The sun had to shine for a reason, it had to. How does it shine when someone so beautiful is gone? A woman which made it seem like the reason the world even moved was because of her. Now she was gone, and nothing seemed to be worth it. All the purpose for everything he seemed to do was gone. There was no reason to even go on. It seemed like the sun had disappeared, and no one could heal him.

Now as he stood atop a grave that shouldn't even be there, he was frozen. Frozen like time didn't exist anymore. The world had stopped moving since he held her in his arms, cold. The paramedics had taken her away saying they would do all they could for her, had they lied? The doctor wouldn't look him in the eyes, and he had exploded. Who knew what he had done. All he remembered was falling to the ground a sob choking out his throat, but he didn't cry.

Now he did, every single night since she had slipped away. He tried working only to break in tears every time he entered her workspace. He could never go back, not now. He had quit and left the office without looking back. Now seven months since she had left him, he still hadn't gotten over it. Though he had sold everything that reminded him of her. His truck, house, everything. He packed and left town only to find himself back her. Even though he promised himself to leave everything behind.

He had left for Mexico, only to find that that to reminded him of her. Nothing could wash away her face, not beer, nothing. He had traveled around the country picking up girls in bars for one night of pleasure. He had turned into Tony. How could that possibly be him? It was though. Now he looked down and set the bouquet of roses on her grave.

"Boss?" Tony's voice filled his ear. Gibbs turned slowly towards him. It was Tony, but was it? His hair buzzed off, and his attire more mellow then it used to be. How could so much change in five months?

"I'm not you boss DiNozzo." he said looking back down at her grave.

"Your right...your not...my old boss would fight to get over this." Tony said hitting one of Gibbs' heart strings.

"Your right...but he died with her."

"I know." he said looking down to he grave. "A little of all of us died with her...I know my boss died." he added trying to catch Gibbs' eye. Gibbs covered his eyes with his hand feeling the tears come. Why? He had lost so many people in his life, why was he able to get over Shannon but not her?

"It's not right..." Gibbs choked out. It wasn't.

"We know who did it...how come we can't prove it?"

"I don't...k-k-know." he said trying not to break down in front of Tony. He had done that to many times before. He was supposed to be strong, how come he wasn't anymore?

"Stop trying to be a man...cry." Tony said completely shocking Gibbs, but that's all he needed to set him off. Gibbs fell to his knees tears falling down his face. He cried, like the person he was right now.

"I was supposed to protect her!" Gibbs shouted at Tony who just dropped to his knees next to him. "She's supposed to be alive..." he added dropping his head into his hands.

"But she's not and do you think this is how she would want you to be?" Tony asked. He just shook his head falling to the ground like he had done so many times before.

"Abby...why?" he murmured into the grass. She couldn't be gone.