"What is this?" He stares at the bottle his sister is handing to him, his eyes red from the tears he told himself he wouldn't cry but did anyway.

"This, my dear baby brother," Leah tells him, sitting down next to him, legs crossed, facing him on the couch. "Is a very special type of medicine that will make you forget. It's called vodka."

"I don't want to get drunk, Leah."

"Well, maybe you don't, but I do. And no one likes to drink alone. So here. For my sake."

Seth takes the bottle and takes a swig. He coughs, his throat burning.

"Jesus, Seth, you're more innocent than I thought. Don't chug that shit."

He pushes the bottle away, not wanting another taste.

"Oh come on. That won't make you drunk! You're a big giant wolf, you're gonna need more than that."

"I don't want more than that," he mumbles. Leah pushes the bottle towards him.

"Come on," she urges. "It won't hurt. Not till morning, at least."

He shakes his head.

"Seth-"

"No Leah!" He shouts. She stares at him, sits back, and takes a swig from the bottle. He notices she doesn't cough.

"He's really fucked you up, hasn't he."

He scratches at his arm, trying to concentrate on the television. "I don't wanna talk about it."

"No, of course you don't, but we're going to, not unless we want you blowing up and massacring the town."

Seth shakes his head. "Can't we do this another time?"

"Nope. Mom's out, and I've got five bottles of vodka to get through."

"What, are you planning on killing me through alcohol?"

She shrugs. "Wouldn't hurt as much."

He stares at his sister, who stares back. Then he cracks a little bit of a grin and goes for the bottle. "You're a terrible role model."

She shrugs. "Shut up and drink."

xxx.

God only knows how many drinks later, and Seth and Leah are playing a game.

"Never have I ever gone streaking through Forks."

"Does... does being an accomplice to the streaking count?"

He gives his sister a questioning glance.

"S... senior year. Prank. Sa... Sam went."

He nods. "That... it counts."

Leah throws back a shot.

"My turn. Never have I ever gone cliff diving."

Seth drinks. She glares. "I went with him. Uhm, with Sam. It isn't like... I mean... I didn't get, get hurt."

"Whatever. Go."

He looks out the window, thoughts plaguing his mind. He clearly isn't drunk enough yet.

"Never have I ever had my heart broken by Jacob Black."

They both drink to that one.

xxx.

He doesn't even know where they're going. He doesn't even know where he is. Or who he is. Or what his name is.

"Wh... what's mahname?" He slurs. The woman next to him laughs.

"Your name is Sam. No!" She erupts into hysterical laughter. "Your name isn't Sam! Your name is, it's, it's Seth! SETH!"

Seth jumps up. "YEAH! I'm Seth! And you, you're... you're Leah!"

Leah grins. "I'm Leah! I'm your sister!"

"My sister!" He yells, and they both embrace each other tightly.

"So, sister," he says, looping his arm through hers and stumbling slightly over a rock. "Where... where are we going?"

"Well, dear brother," she says. "I think we're going to egg a house."

"Who... whose house?"

She gives him a dark look. Then she looks both ways, and whispers, as if it were a really dirty word.

"Jacob Black."

"Oh," Seth says, staring up at the sky. Then he says, not exactly to anybody, "I love him."

Leah nods. "So do I."

They walk along in silence for a while. Then he says, "Sister. How- how are we gonna, gonna egg his house? If we don't, have any? Eggs?"

Leah stops, puts a hand to her chin as if thinking.

"Uhm. Rocks."

"But that's! That's dangerous!"

"Brother! Think of, of what he did!"

Seth knows very well what he did. "But it wasn't, it wasn't his fault. It was her fault. Rebecca. Rachel. Renee. Rooly? Renesky?"

Leah snorts. "No, it's Renesmee."

Despite the pain in his heart, Seth laughs. "Really?"

"Yeah!"

"That's... that's a stupid name."

"It's retarded."

Suddenly, he starts to laugh. He laughs really hard until he can't breathe. Then he falls to the ground and laughs and then suddenly he's crying. He lays on the sidewalk and stares at the sky and he cries and Leah asks, "what?"

"It's a gay name."

She lies down next to him. She takes his hand in hers and says, quietly, "maybe, when we wake up in the morning, we won't love him anymore."

xxx.

When Seth wakes up in the morning, his head is throbbing. The light shining through his bedroom window blinds him. Light breathing next to him sounds like someone is shouting in his ear.

It's Leah who is sleeping next to him. He wonders if they cleaned up after themselves last night.

When he goes into the kitchen, he sees his mother cleaning up empty vodka bottles and figures they didn't.

"What's wrong, Seth?" Sue Clearwater says, much louder than is necessary. "Does your head hurt? Would you like an ASPIRIN?"

He stares at the empty bottles and he tries to remember his night but all that comes to mind is sobbing on the sidewalk and at that memory more tears come.

He really cries far too often for a werewolf.

At the sight of her son crying in front of her, Sue loses most of her anger and advances, trying to wrap her arms around him. But Seth jerks away and walks out the door.

He knows where he's going the entire time but he won't admit it to himself, not even as he walks up to the door and pounds. The sound makes him flinch and he leans his head against the cool glass as he waits.

No one comes to the door.

The door is locked so he shoulders his way in with ease and makes his way to Jacob's bedroom. Of course he's not at home. Why would he be? Not with everything he ever wanted over at the Cullen house.

Still crying, more from anger now than anything else, he proceeds to rip apart Jacob Black's room, tearing up paper and knocking over his dresser, ripping clothes.

When he's done, he somehow doesn't feel any better.

xxx.

Leah is waiting for him when he gets home.

"You went after him."

He nods.

"He wasn't at home."

He hesitates. He shakes his head.

Then Leah laughs. She laughs for a long time. Then she says, "I know. I went and checked, too."

Seth makes a noise that is somewhere between a laugh and a sob.

"Are we getting drunk tonight?" He asks her. She shakes her head.

"No."

"Then how do we make this pain go away?"

Leah takes his hand in hers and squeezes tightly, as much for her benefit as for his.

"We don't."

I don't know what's up with me and Seth lately. But expect more of this pairing.