Rebirth

Characters © DC Comics.

[AN: This is a look into one of the dynamics in the Joker/Harley relationship. If depictions of masochism and/or sadomasochism bothers you, please do not read. Dark fic. ]

Things hadn't gone well for Harley at all. It had been one of her first heist attempts alongside The Joker since she'd broken him out of Arkham Asylum, and she totally blew it. True she'd messed up in the past on a few occasions, but never had she been given the death glare that she was getting now.

Inside she knew what had truly set her puddin' off. It wasn't the fact that she'd made one tiny slip up, but the fact The B-man was involved in this one.

Harley sat quietly to herself as the car zoomed towards their hideout. Nobody was speaking. Even his other cronies had chosen to hold their tongues for fear of their fate ending up six feet below ground.

Harley bit her lip and shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Should she dare break this silence and try to ease his anger?

Taking a deep breath to calm herself, she began.

"Hey Mistah J why so angry?" (as she spoke she crept closer to him.)

"It's not like our chances of getting Batman are gone for-"

Suddenly, Harley's words were cut off by a harsh slap to the face. Instantly she recoiled. Eyes brimmed slightly with tears as she stared, almost in shock, as her puddin' was now turning his attention back to the road. Almost as if she wasn't worth his attention.

Her chin quivered slightly as she rubbed the sting out of her cheek. She could already feel the slap leaving a bright red mark.

Not wanting to upset him further, Harley kept her gaze out the car window. Sniffling quietly to herself. While staring out the window she began to ponder why exactly that slap had conjured up a mixture of emotions. Sure it had upset her, but something else was beginning to bubble to the surface. Some unknown emotion that had been buried deep deep down until this very moment.

Looking back at The Joker, Harley realized that it wasn't over with just one little slap. No, not with him. She knew better then that. Even though she'd only been with him a short while, she felt she knew him better then most people did…if that was even possible.

While pondering all these thoughts, Harley didn't even realize that a faint flutter was coursing through her body at the thought of The Joker doing something like this again.

~**~

When they got back to the hideout, all the goons were immediately shooed away. The Joker pointing a gun a their heads really seemed to speed up their departure. Harley and The Joker were the only ones left in the room now.

Looking around the room one could tell that it wasn't well taken care of. It was rather dilapidated and things were littered all over the floor. From old curtains to broken glass from shattered mirrors or old pictures. The carpet was extremely dirty as well. With them always on the move to different hideouts, there really was no need to clean.

Her eyes had trailed all around the room before coming at a stop at Joker's form. He stood quite and still. Eyes giving his harlequin helper a seething glare. One filled with anger and a faint mix of amusement.

Harley was unsure what to do here. So far, he hadn't yelled at her. Which was something quite shocking to her because he almost always yelled when he got angry. But this time, he was just standing there.

Trying to ease the building tension, Harley cracked a weak smile but that brought nothing from The Joker. Instead, she was immediately shoved hard against the wall. She gave a strained squeak as he squeezed her thin shoulders with enough force she felt they might break. This coupled with the dizziness from her head slamming against the wall really didn't help much.

He was so close to her now that she could feel his hot breath caress against her skin. Almost in a sinister manner. It gave her a faint shiver. Out of all of her time with him so far, he'd never been this rough with her. Flashing her eyes quickly over to the doorway for a split second, she suddenly felt his gloved hand grip her face in a vice-like hold.

He shoved her face back around towards him. He didn't yell or anything. Instead, he said in a soft purring voice that made Harley shudder inside.

"Look at me."

All the while he kept pressing Harley harder and harder against the wall. She was beginning to find difficulty breathing.

Keeping that same pleasant voice that, at times, hitched in it's inflection, he continued on.

"Now Harley, sweetheart, pumpkin pie…I'm sure you can tell me just why everything plus my chances of….finally…getting…Batman were just completely thrown out the window. Hmm? I'm sure you can tell me that can't you? You're a smart girl, aren't you?"

Realizing he was now waiting for a response, she meekly replied,

"y-yes M-mistah J."

A sudden smile crept slowly across his scarred face. There was a glint in his eye that Harley couldn't quite put her finger one. It unnerved her.

"How about we turn this into a game? You give me the correct answer, and everything goes peachy keen hunky dory. But give me the wrong answer, and I break one of your fingers."

While speaking, his hand had crept up and had taken hold of Harley's wrist. He now held her trembling hand. Stroking and caressing it softly, almost lovingly, with his fingers.

Seeing he was dead serious about this Harley managed to keep a cool head as she nodded mutely.

A giddy sound like laughter came from The Joker as he gripped her hand a bit firmer.

"Goodie. Now let's begin, shall we?"

Harley gulped as she kept telling herself to remain calm. Her Mistah J wouldn't do anything to her. This was all just a bluff. Still, she had to keep her head about her.

She let out a slow breath as the game began.

"Ok, honey. Can you please tell me just why the guards were alerted to our presence when attempting to rob that museum?"

She bit her lip. Inside she knew the truth but it pained her terribly to even utter those words. It made her feel as if she was a failure, and what she'd failed at was making him happy.

She didn't know why she said what she did next. Perhaps out of nervousness or not wanting to see the painful truth of it. Either way it was blurted out. She lied she lied to her one and only.

"Uh, I dunno Mistah J. M-maybe it was Jim? May-maybe he tripped the alarm? You know how he is sometimes-"

Crying out in pain as her hand was crushed, Harley whimpered and squinted her eyes shut, knowing what was to come next. Why did she do it? Why'd she have to lie?

Snatching up her pointer finger on her left hand, he then twisted it harsh at an unnatural angle. Pain seared suddenly through Harley as she emitted a piercing scream that was muffled by The Joker's hand. Her screams harsh against his hand. Tears running down her face now as she sobbed.

"No, I think you know the real answer. It was your fault, wasn't it Harley? Answer me."

His face barely an inch from hers now. He moved his hand slightly from her mouth so she could speak.

Tears still streaming down her face, she choked back a sob as she spoke those awful trembling words.

"It-it was my fault, Mistah J. My fault.."

She said barely above a whisper.

"Aaaaaaannnd that's why you're going to be punished….right now!"

He growled as he smashed his fist against her face letting her topple to the floor with a thud. He then commenced to beating every inch of her body. With every punch he spoke, and with every word it seemed the blows were landing harder and harder.

"Your fault! Your fault my chances of getting rid of that over-grown flying rat are now gone! Your…fault…Harley!"

As she felt each blow bring fresh new pain to her shaking body, she also felt the pain of her pudding's harsh words. Yes…it was her fault and she needed to accept that. With each blow she found herself coming closer and closer to that acceptance.

Also, she began to notice that with each harder blow, punch and kick, there was that strange flutter again. As waves upon waves of pain now filled her, she began to feel almost giddy. As if she almost liked it.

Almost like with every new wave all her raw energy and hopelessness was let out. She also began to feel a twinge of arousal. That was what shocked her the most. As the beating slowly ebbed she let out a low moan. Mixture from the pain and pleasure her pudding's punishment had brought.

Her body was still shaking.

She felt a sudden jolt of surprise as The Joker had then cradled her in his lap against his chest. It lulled her to sleep almost instantly. The muffled heartbeat and breathing of him. Also how his voice sounded muffled yet somehow still strong against her ear.

"You know I'm truly sorry for doing that, honey. But I had to. You had to be taught a lesson.."

He then carefully took her bruised face in his hand and tilted it upwards so she could face him.

"You have learned your lesson right? No more lies?"

She laughed as much as her painful body would allow.

"Yes, Mistah J. No more lies. Truth always from now on."

She then sighed contentedly as she snuggled against his chest. She couldn't help but feel somewhat happy after all, even with a beaten body and a broken finger. But somehow this entire experience had been soo liberating to her.

She wondered if she would ever be able to experience it again?

Her thoughts were interrupted by The Joker rousing her awake almost gently. He'd then gotten up and headed towards the bathroom.

Somewhat confused, Harley tilted her head to one side most likely giving a comical look. What on Earth was he doing? Weren't they just getting relaxed right now?

She then heard the medicine cabinet open with a squeak and some rummaging through the many assortment of items in there. Finally, the door shut with a snap and he came out bearing what appeared to be a foam splint, bandages, and a couple pills of medicine.

Setting back down on the floor he gently took her hand with the busted finger and eyed it carefully. It amazed her at how easy he was being…when just a few minutes ago, he was violent.

She gave a whimper when he brushed against the busted digit accidentally.

He caressed her face gently with his free hand, wiping away her tears.

"shh-shh-shh-shh"

His voice was very gentle…almost loving. Well, as close to loving as the Joker could get.

"Eeeasssy Harley, we got to get this bandaged up." he said as he carefully applied the splint, wrapping it together with the bandages he brought.

"Wouldn't want a bad healing job, now would we?"

With that finished he gave her the two pills.

"Here, take these. They'll help with the pain."

Getting her a glass of water she then swallowed the medicine. She began to feel better almost instantly. Little did she know how long this good feeling would last.

~**~

Over the next few weeks everything had seemed to go smoothly for Harley. Her Mistah J appeared to be in a lighter mood around her and wasn't quite so snappy with her. He'd even gotten her a drink when she'd slipped up and asked him. That shocked her. Normally she would've just been belted in the mouth, but this time he'd cheerfully done as she'd asked. Even whistling while doing so.

While this was a nice break for her, Harley really wanted to get back into the swing of things with him. All she'd been allowed to do for the past weeks was just lay about. Him never even asking (or demanding) that she accompany him. Which was usually the case, and she'd always happily oblige.

But not now. Now he'd been saying for her to stay at the lair, that they had things covered. Treating her like a child it seemed. It was fine for a while, but now she was getting itchy feet and wanted to spend more time laughing and messing with the Bat with her puddin'

As soon as she heard the front door come slamming loudly open, she popped her head up from the covers. She'd been using the couch as a bed during the day. Instantly ecstatic, she bounded towards him with open arms. Almost unable to contain her giddy excitement.

"Hiyah Mistah J! Everything go alright, or should I say all wrong with the Bats?"

As she spoke she hovered around him closely, like a lost puppy. He didn't seem to irked by her presence, though. He simply gave her a smile and patted her head gently.

"Everything went exceedingly well, Harley. We almost had him this time."

He'd turned and was sauntering nonchalantly as he spoke.

"Oh the look on his face when the car blew up. Hmm…a shame that family was rescued though. Their reaction would've been funny to see."

Harley expression feel slightly at his words. Hmm…seemed like Mistah J was more relaxed this time. In fact, she'd taken notice that he'd been in increasingly more and more good moods whenever he arrived back home. Always more then happy to share fun stories of mayhem and chaos that she'd missed out on.

With each one Harley felt more and more sad. It seemed the happier he got, the sadder she became. But why should she be sad? What right did she have to be sad? She didn't. If her puddin' was happy, that's all that should matter.

Still, the sadness brewing inside her was becoming more and more difficult to bear. She didn't know how long she'd be able to last.

Fighting back the break in her voice, Harley said in her best cheerful voice,

"That's-that's wonderful puddin' I'm sure you really got the Bats goin' bonkers there."

She'd managed to smile but a faint flutter of the edge of her mouth caught his eye. He turned and faced her directly. His eyes narrowed faintly.

"Are you sure? You're tone ah….says you think differently…."

Cursing herself on the inside for not being strong, she simply shook her head. For some reason this helped her voice become slightly stronger. The wavy break hardly noticeable now.

"Yeh, I'm sure, Mistah J. Why would I not be? Sounded like you had a fun fun time."

Just as she went to continue, she felt something warm and fuzzy rub against her leg. This action accompanied by a whine. Looking down she noticed it was Bud.

Suddenly realizing, she quickly said she had to go feed the babies and walked into the kitchen. Secretly she was glad of this interruption. Tears were now pouring down her face.

The Joker, while setting on the cough, might not have been able to see her tears, but he defiantly sensed them. He quickly covered his mouth with one hand as he let out a stream of quite giggles. His eyes fluttering closed as he rocked back and forth n the couch in glee.

While in the kitchen Harley'd gotten the meat from the fridge and was now absent mindedly placing it into the bowl. Bud and Lou danced around her madly, yipping softly in happiness. Looking down at her babies she couldn't help but smile. They always cheered her up when she was feeling down. She began to get lost in thought, only for that to be broken by a soft nudging at her leg. Lou was now gently pawing at her leg. He stared at her intently, yipping softly. She tilted her head slightly.

"What's wrong my baby?"

Lou gave another nudge and it was only then that she realized she was holding the last piece of meat.

"Oh, here yah go sweetie."

she gave it to Lou who proceeded to snatch it up gratefully. He sighed contently as he chewed, happy to get his meal.

As she watched she pondered. How could she have forgotten Lou's meal? She'd never done that before. Her lip began to tremble as her eyes flooded with tears. Not wanting to alert Mistah J or cause a scene from the henchmen, she quickly wrapped her arms around her babies and buried her tear streaked face into their fur.

The babies, sensing her pain, whined softly and licked her face. Trying to do what they knew to comfort her. Harley cries where muffled by their fur. After weeks of her pent up frustration she was finally letting it out. But she didn't know if this alone would be enough to sooth her ache.

~**~

Over the next few days the routine had stayed the same. Mistah J went off and left her all by her lonesome save for the babies. All the while her frustration was mounting more and more. She'd wanted to say something, but the fear of upsetting her puddin' had stopped her. She didn't want to see him unhappy, even if it was for her sake.

While he was gone, her mood would drastically decline during the day. Only for her to force it back up when he arrived home. It worked for a while, but no more. Lost in her frustration she was now standing in front of the mirror. Her hair tousled and messy from her getting up from a nap. She frowned at the mirror. She didn't like her reflection that way. It reminded her of who she was before she'd met her love.

She wasn't that anymore. Or…was she? After all, Mistah J no longer took her anywhere she was just stuck at home. The same thing day after day. Like it was when she was living the 'normal' life as others called it. What made that so much different from now? Nothing. It was exactly the same.

These thoughts finally pushing her frustration to it's breaking point, she let out a squeal of rage and fury as she yanked at her hair. Her hands then coming down into balled fists as she suddenly struck her leg hard.

In that instant she stopped. She gazed into the mirror as a fresh wave of pain began to flood through her. With this feeling her mouth gaped open and a faint groan escaped her. Gripping the edge of the sink she came to a sudden realization. The frustration she'd been feeling all this time had somewhat eased up. She felt….better in a sense.

With this realization she then peered at her leg carefully. The spot that she'd struck had now grown a faint shade of red. She touched it and winced at the pain. Gazing back at the mirror she slowly closed her eyes and struck again. This time harder. At contact, and even louder groan escaped her. Her legs began to shake as waves of pleasure. With her eyes closed she then imagined it wasn't her striking, but Mistah J. Punishing her for something she'd done wrong. Each strike became harder and harder. Her mouth parted gently as she began to pant. Soft moans escaping her.

"Mistah J Mistah J…."

She moaned softly…

~**~

While discovering this had eased her frustration somewhat, it did little to help her sadness. Without anything to do for him she felt useless. Especially when she was unable to accompany him anywhere.

Keeping her bruises a secret from him had been somewhat easy, but she didn't know how long that would last. She shuddered at the thought of what he'd do. He would be soo mad at her. He'd know she was the cause of them as well. He hadn't laid a hand on her since that night he'd poured it to her good.

Keeping the secret had lasted, but it had all come to a head a few days later.

As she was changing in the bedroom one day, she was loudly interrupted by The Joker slamming the door open. This was actually normal and usually she would've gone on and finished getting dressed all the while listening to his rants about how they were going to blow up buildings or rob a bank that day.

But on this day, Harley jumped nervously as he came in. Not wanting to draw too much attention she crept as normally as she could towards the bathroom, claiming she had to brush her teeth. The Joker, not being fooled, had followed.

Noticing that Mistah J was staring right at her and her feeble attempts to hide the bruises before he could see, she let out a slight scream. That was what sealed it.

"Why so jumpy, Harley?"

He asked casually, leaning against the doorframe. His eyes locked onto her bare legs.

She'd let out a feeble shaky laugh.

"Oh, sorry puddin, yah scared me is all."

The Joker's mouth twitched in an almost knowing smile before he spoke again.

"That's funny. You used to not be scared of me before?…….Why now?"

He'd gotten dangerously close to her face now. His eyes glinting evilly in the light. Trying to cover up her words she shook her head.

"Did I say scared, I meant startled. Yeh, That's what it was is all."

She'd managed another feeble laugh as she stared at him. Trying her best to show in her eyes she was not lying. But it usually never worked.

He simply nodded casually and straitened up slightly. The smile still playing on his lips.

"Ohhhhhh ok. I see. Just startled you is all. Didn't mean to, Harley."

His features twitched with something. Harley, knowing him the best out of any of them would say it was rage.

She'd also noticed that his tone had grown increasingly more deadly as he spoke.

Sensing danger her breath quickened as he began moving towards her. She saw no way out, he'd caught her like a rabbit in a foxhole.

"Oh, and before I forget, one more question, Harley. Could you tell me how you got THESE!??"

He growled viciously as he bolted like lightening towards his escaping prey. Holding her wrist in a vice grip he'd jerked her to her feet and was now making her stand eye to eye with him. The tips of her toes barely grazed the linoleum floor. She gasped at the pain in her arm but not dared take her eyes off him.

"Answer me. How'd you get those bruises."

He quirked an eyebrow as he waited for her reply. Not hearing one he jerked her arm up even tighter. The burning ache almost blinding her it was so painful.

"Tell me, or your whole ARM goes buh bye."

His voice a deadly whisper, hot breath caressed her ear.

She winced. She knew he wasn't playing around.

Biting her lip her voice came out in a shaky breathe.

"I-I did Mistah J…I did it…to myself."

To her horror a wide knowing smile spread over his features. His yellow stained teeth showing through parted lips. He'd jerked her up even higher to where her feet were completely off the ground now. The pain so bad it felt as if her arm were being slowly ripped out of it's socket. She fought not to pass out on him.

He'd then grabbed her other arm, jerking it over her head. This caused a slight yelp from Harley. He then slowly began walking her backwards towards the toilet. The lid was down so it easily made a makeshift seat for her to set on. She cried out more from being startled then fear as he forced her to set down. Her expression then turned to one of confusion as he then sat on her lap. His legs startling her so even if she wanted to get up she couldn't. She was now trapped. Trying not to cry due to the pain screaming from her heavily bruised legs, she tried casually to look into his eyes. But inside she shook with unknown fear. She'd screwed up big-time.

The silence was suddenly broken by a giggling fit from The Joker. He had to cover his mouth to stifle it.

"Harls, you really slay me, you know? You loved it when I beat you, didn't you? You wanted to be hit again."

His laughing fit started up once more.

"And-and not getting it from me you couldn't take it anymore and decided to take care of the problem yourself. "

His expression then turned deadly as he grabbed Harley shoulder's tightly.

She noticed the tone in his voice fluctuate with his words.

"You shoulda tooold me Harley. If it's a beating you want….a beating you're gonna get."

Now sensing immense danger and a possible threat to her life, she tried to protest but was cut off by his fist slamming into her face. Even with her fight or flight response on full force, she still let out a mewling groan at contact.

At this The joker let out a squealing laugh.

"You really do love it, dontcha Harls?"

He continued to laugh psychotically as he slammed his fists repeatedly at Harley's trembling frame. All the while she continued to let out soft cries of pleasure.

~**~

After a while when the pain and slowly began to ebb away, Harley awoke to find her still seating on the toilet. But she noticed something different. The Joker was now holding his switchblade out. He was casually twirling it between his fingers. Her fuzzy mind registered an unknown tune he was humming.

Turning as seeing her eyes flutter open, he flashed her a grin.

"Ahhh, good you're awake."

He then placed his hand around the back of Harley's head in a forceful manner and brought it towards him. This action instantly awoke her. She stared at him. Stared at the knife. Even with the pain she still managed to shake with fear.

"P-puddin'?

Her voice shaky.

He was tilting her face to the side as she spoke. The bright lights now flashed directly in her weary vision. She shut them tight.

All she could hear now was his voice.

"Ah, ah ahhhhhhhhhhhhh, no talking right now. This is tricky.

Wouldn't want to uh slip or anything here."

Even though she couldn't see him she could practically hear the smile in his voice. Taking in a small breathe she fought to remain calm. It was obvious this was another of his tests and wanted to see if she'd pass or not.

Her composure was instantly shaken to the core though when she felt the blade press into the side of her mouth. Her tongue pressed against it wetly as she swallowed, fighting against her growing dry mouth. She knew what was coming next. What was etched on his face would soon be etched on hers. Still, she couldn't help the tears that were now pouring down her face.

'Please…no."

Her voice barely a whisper. The blade making it difficult for her to speak properly. Her voice coming out jumbled.

Mentally, she began fighting for something that could possibly snap him out of doing what he was about to do. She couldn't think of anything else but one word.

"Daddy…"

Ridiculous. She thought. That wouldn't do anything. Why she even though of that word she didn't know. He wasn't her father. She was an adult. Stupid really.

She heard him laugh slightly.

"Daddy eh?"

He seemed to disregard the word as he then told her to stay still. Gouging her eye out wasn't what he'd had planned for this one.

He then pressed the blade full force with violent speed into her jaw line. This causing a deep rip of the skin from the edge of the mouth all the way to the tip of the ear. She screaming in ear shattering agony as blood seeped and poured from the wound. The Joker did little except say "I know I know" casually as he moved for the other side of her mouth, repeating the process.

It was too much. She'd finally passed out.

~**~

She'd awoken a second time to find herself laying comfortably in their bed. The covers drawn over her casing much desired warmth to spread over her. She sighed gently and went to yawn, only to be cut off by a sharp searing pain.

Reaching a weak hand up she felt along her mouth. Stunned she felt what seemed to be stitches along the gashes. She then felt a sudden gush of happiness flow over her. Her Mistah J had taken care of her. Then perhaps he wasn't as angry as she thought he'd been. It had all been just to teach her a lesson, that's all.

As her weary eyes tried to focus on the room, she noticed The Joker standing in the doorway. Shifting his weight from one foot to the other he spoke.

"Ah, you're awake pumpkin."

His voice was cheery again. No hint of the deadly tone at all anymore that she'd heard earlier.

She strained to nod at his words. Her head still pounding from the pain.

He strolled casually across the floor coming to stare out one of the windows in the room. Moonlight shone heavily through the tattered curtains.

"It's been a while since we've had any fun with The Bat or even blown up a city together, Harley. What do you say on doing just that? When your uh scars heal of course. "

Harley was suddenly ecstatic. She squealed with happiness the best her injuries would allow.

"Of, of course Mistah J!"

"I can't wait to give the old bats the run around."

As much as she was delighted that her Mistah J was now paying attention to her again, she couldn't fight the wave of fatigue that was now flowing over her. Stifling a yawn she laid her head against her pillow, slowly waiting for blissful dreams to come.

The Joker then stalked back across the room, speaking as he did so.

"Of course, baby. But rest for now."

As he got to the doorway he turned slightly to face her. His features twitching in a would-be smile.

"I can't wait for Gotham to get it's first look at the new you…"

Harley's eyes had now fluttered closed being lulled to sleep by her puddin's laughter echoing throughout the house.