Disci: Hey one and all. This is a parody of Alex Rider. It will consist of all of the books i have read so feel free to Spot them out and shout them to me...I`ll give you a chapter if you do :P.

But all rights go to their story owners-not is purely for fun.

Chapter 1

Schools Out

"Dring, Dring, and Dring" The schools bell rang out suddenly, loud and clear. It was the second to Last day of term, and a whole mass of hours of fun. Hope fully not including getting shot at, manhandled or threatened in any way was awaiting the spy boy....ME. Alex rider and all that stood in between me and the happiness of summer was the MI6 boss, also known as Mr Blunt, though I have many more names but I shouldn't really say them.

So far everything had gone well; there were no men in black suits with pistols in their pockets, or men with massacred face. Nope, there was none of this insight, besides spotty kids and girls with thick make up, like the schools snot soup, and teachers that...just...Looked...scary and...Old.

Sometimes when the teachers got angry it looked as though they were about to have a heart attack. So lots of fun...and bets.

As I made my way down the stony, gum filled corridor with the other thousands of shouting children I couldn't help but smile and join in. Kids were ripping up old test papers. Although I suspected that bits of my stolen homework was among it, and throwing it up into the air with whoops and shouts. I felt someone smack in to me on the next corner and turned to see one of my best friends.

His name was Tom, Tom Harris and he is about the same age as me, although he's small for his age, he makes up with it for speed which really irritates me on sports day, as we become main rivals . He had black spiked up hair, in what he called the style which made him look like a hedgehog and was lethal if he shook his head anywhere near your face. With Bright blue eyes he could easily be found in the dark.

But my little buddy here was one of the two people who knew my deadly secret, and strangely envied me for it. I looked around, savouring up this moment. The smell of the corridor, the sound of the children's happiness and the annoying jokes that Tom was saying...well shouting. I just wanted this moment to go on and on forever and ever. But of course, moments like this are always destroyed by the adults. And I knew that it was only a matter of minutes, seconds even that they would attack and once again scar my life in some way or other.

"Oi, wait up "shouted Tom from somewhere of to my left. He came over and thumped my shoulder playfully.

"What was that for...."I stared at him enquiringly, waiting for an answer but instead I got a huge grin. So I thumped him back

"Ow, hay what the hell..." he growled while rubbing his shoulder

"You did it to me so, fairs fair I guess...so what are you doing tomorrow Tommy... after school" I smiled and looked towards him while walking on forwards.

"Footie you blonde bimbo" Tom mumbled the last bit looking down as we practically threw ourselves of the stairs.

"Oh great your back to the blonde jokes again, look I will physically rearrange your face if you don't shut up with those stupid jokes.... small fry" I smiled looking down after clenching my fists.

"But it`s funny, and everyone seems to enjoy it" He grinned.

"yeah well so`s your face, and everyone is laughing at you not with you...remember that."I raised an eyebrow at him and looked at down at his shoes, for some reason his trainers had caught my attention but he interrupted me by shoving me playfully in the shoulder into a girl in front of me

"Hay...Watch it" she said looking slightly up at me and frowning. I put my hands up in surrender

"I'm so sorry... but somebody pushed me" I growled the last bit shoving hard into tom sending him flying into a maths classroom. When he disappeared from sight with a yowl, I turned my attention back to the girl. She was fairly pretty with dark brown hair that was turning blonde and deep blue eyes.

She looked familiar and as I was about to ask where I might have seen her before she had started laughing, as a startled maths teacher turned to see Tom flying into her lesson. And her laughing seemed to be infectious because a smile had started to creep up on my face. I don't think I fancied her but she seemed to be such a nice person that anyone would want to spend time with and instantly feel better, she also had a certain shine about her, angelic somehow, though I bet she was opposite if I got to know her.

A grumbling sound stopped me and I turned to see Tom behind me with only a mind for revenge. He smiled cheekily at me when he caught me staring at the girl, I frowned at him. The girl had disappeared to catch her bus and he nudged me hard in the ribs.

I fell to the floor gasping and heard him giggle.

"Sabina won't like this..." I kicked my foot out to kick his shin and watched him tumble down, but he managed to land on top of me with an "oof" I coughed up what felt like my lungs.

"Argh, get of me you lump what the hell have you been eating...Cement" I pushed him of me and brushed myself down. That's gunna bruise, I thought as I touched my rib and a familiar rush of pain raged from it.

"Nice elbow punch" I smiled grimly and held out my hand for him to help himself up on

"Ow...OW....Ow" Tom winced ad he limped down the hall. "I don't think I'll ever be able to walk again" he grumbled

"Oh stop being such a baby" I grinned cheekily but winced when my ribs flushed with an ache that was all too familiar.

"I don't know why you look so happy, we've got footie tomorrow, I figured your gunna need me but I won't be able to look out for you now" Tom playfully barged my shoulder as we headed out into the sunshine and fresh air. I stopped and looked at him.

"Firstly, sure I use you as a bodyguard to shield of some of the ball attacks, but do you think I would actually need you!" I lengthened the last bit with a sly smile, he knew I was joking but gave me a hard shove anyway. I pushed him back and we both ran the rest or the way to the bike shed whilst punching each other out the way, to see who would get there first. I hadn't noticed it but the playground had totally filtered of children and gave it an eerie kind of feeling. I pushed Tom`s face into the wooden door and was about to reach my bike with a shout, when something hooked round my ankles and they were pulled out from underneath me.

"I beat y....." I managed before the floor greeted my face with a wonderful slap. I stood up spitting out dust, and turned to see Tom fixing on his bike helmet.

"You cheated" I shouted through clomps of dirt whilst fetching my own.

"No I didn't, I just...."

"Grabbed my ankles...like id taught you...I should do less of that" I thought more than said the last part. With a shake of my head and a huge smile I walked round to unlock my bike, once I had finished I started to the front door part. I could see Tom struggling with his bike chain that someone had messed up. I frowned and looked down at the mess.

"Need some help there" I asked with a sigh after I heard the sniggers coming from the other side of the outside shed. The local bullies were back, and I was already pleased that there face wasn't in sight or they'd be having their faces re-adjusted, then again I'd probably be doing them a favour. Tom didn't even look up, but just shrugged and started to fumble around with it. So I bent down after leaning my bike on the post and started to help out. After a swearing and mucky 5 minutes we were finally finished. Rubbing my hands on my trousers I patted Tom`s back and said goodbye, just so I left a hand print. Tom nodded a thank you and tapped the side of my face then sped out the door while shouting.

"See you at football, I'll try and take it easy on you" there seemed to be a snigger, and then a curse as he nearly rode into a tree.

"Yeah that's if you're still alive" I shouted back and was awarded with a swearword. I smiled and placed on my helmet; I readjusted my bike and set off. Before I got out the gates something caught my eye, and I found myself staring at the old and burned science block. I still couldn't quite believe what had actually happened, and it still gave me shivers thinking about it. There was utter silence as I looked out at the gawping hole of the science block. I Shook my head to try and get rid of the recurring fear but couldn't help thinking of the body at the bottom, MY body. I shook my head and breathed out once more, then turned around and pushed off from the ground, and was soon pedalling fast done the road. Little did he know that his world was about to be turned upside down, with even more violence and dangers....somehow.

I bombed it down the Little alleyway, I wasn't really focusing on my cycling ,or even where I was going but my mind was full of what I could be, WILL be doing this summer. It sounded so weird to actually be thinking of something to do that didn't revolve around kicking peoples ass`s or being a target for items that people feel like randomly picking up and throwing at my head or elsewhere.

To know that such a thing as endless days of fun were true and not a dream was very strange I turned tightly round a corner and Sabina suddenly popped into my mind I wonder what she`ll be doing this summer if she`s not too busy with her horse, of course....or family .

As my speed increased I felt a sudden thrill, the speeding down hill feeling. It felt totally exhilarating, the wind violently whipped my hair in and out of my eyes, and a cool breeze played around with the back of my neck. My school tie flapped around my right shoulder like a wild animal that had been agitated. Yep! This was the PROPER life for a fourteen year old; oh how I love my bike...I skidded left and fast pedalled down a footpath. I was nearly home; nearly home it was just the park to concur after the main street. I started to manoeuvre my trusted mountain bike around the local, and not local, pedestrians careful not to run anyone over, who I didn't want to anyway. When suddenly a girl, with curly blonde hair and tattered clothes. Raced out of the pharmacists, and straight into my path.

The poor girl looked around 5 maybe 6yrs old and when she turned to see a huge bike with his rider racing towards her, I bet she got the shock of her life. Of course being me I tried to swerve out the way, because I don't go round running poor little kids over with my bike like grand theft auto.

"Ahhhhhhhhh......"

Disci:

Yepi I'm improving this so...let's see if this will be better.

XSmidge~