AN: I've been feeling a bit more creative lately. This will be a series of vignettes. I'm just playing around with ideas in my head. Haven't uploaded anything in so long.

Disclaimer: I do not own them.

Who am I? Lately I haven't been able to figure it out. I've given myself lots of time, putting it off day by day, blaming it on school, blaming it on the food I eat, blaming it on being sick last week, I even try to blame it on not getting enough sleep.

Daily I wake up, eat breakfast with Wei and Xiao Lang, go to school, come home, do my homework, go to sleep, and then the cycle repeats. I have even given up on tagging along to the magical twosome's card capturing parties every night. I can't seem to shake this feeling of uselessness. I haven't felt this way in a long time.

Before Xiao Lang, no I should say before I was his fiancée, I was that. Useless. I don't think my father ever found me of any use, of course, I wasn't a boy. Sometimes I hated being born into the Li Family. What good is a name if you aren't even wanted? Before I was born, they thought I was a boy. My father and my mother, they even raised me like one. When I was old enough to walk they forced me into martial arts, they encouraged me to play outside, and when I fell from climbing trees, they didn't fawn over me like Xiao Lang's parents did his sisters. They told me it was natural. In a way, I want to thank them for not raising me to be a prissy princess. But no one likes a loud mouth brat. So I've been told many times to my face.

I am loud. I am defiant. I am confident. I am Mei Ling. Yet I've never been able to relate. I couldn't relate to anyone.

I found relating difficult.

Xiao Lang walked into class, silent and demanding. The giggling from the cliques of girls around the room caught my attention as Xiao Lang's eyes swept the room for two empty seats. The room held it's breath as he chose and swiftly sat down. I responded to the glares directed toward me with a wavering smile as I sat down next to him. It was tiring.

I was awkward.

"Hey! I haven't seen you in a while, Lu Qiao said she hadn't talked to you all summer!"

"Oh hey Mei Ling! Yeah I haven't been able to catch up with her yet."

"Hehe, well I'm sure you'll catch up with her soon. She came to school today I think..." I smiled, "Cause you know first day of school and all."

She blinked at me unsure of how to respond. "Oh..."

The class began to file into the class room. And that... was the end of that.

I always screwed up.

He climbed the tree, higher and higher, reaching the top.

"Xiao Lang!" He didn't want to come down.

I stood beneath the tree, arms crossed and angry. "If you don't come down now I'm telling," I stomped my feet beneath him.

"Fine! I'm coming up!" I called, beginning to climb. I wanted to see the world from the top too.

He looked alarmed, "No! Stay there I'll come down!" Of course, he didn't want to get in trouble if I fell.

"I won't fall Ah Lang! Shee-" Just as I said that my foot slipped, my shoe flew, and fell to the ground with a soft thud. I screamed.

"Mei Ling!" he scrambled to me, reaching out his hand, but I couldn't reach.

I slipped some, feeling the bark splinter into my fingers. I screamed again, this time in pain. He lunged forward and grabbed onto my arm.

But it was too late, we landed on the ground and I heard a sickening crack. I waited for the pain to come but it didn't, when I finally opened my eyes I found Xiao Lang writhing in pain cradling his left arm.

I relied on others too much.

I wailed into Tomoyo's lap as she patted my back. Why did things hurt so much?

"Why couldn't it be me?" I cried, sobbing hard, the hot tears seemed never ending.

She responded by smoothing my hair.

The tears made me choke,"I'm the one that loves him the most!!"

Was I really just someone useless?

Because this loud, defiant, and confident Mei Ling is lost.

Wasn't there anyone out there that could give me an answer?