Chapter 2

Telling Peeta

"Katniss just tell me, I can take it."

I slowly look up at him. I feel the hot tears slide down my cheeks. It is quite here at the back of the train that I swear I just heard my tears hit the ground.

Pull yourself together Katniss. I say to myself. He's going to have to find out sooner or later.

"No you can't. If i were to tell you, you would hate me almost as much as i hate myself and i couldn't live with that Peeta, I can't afford to lose you."

I great I've really done it now. Now i have to hop for a miracle and for Peeta to drop the subject completely but like that was ever going to happen.

"Katniss come on just tell me. Whatever it is i think i have a right to know."

Well he is right about that.

Oh here we go again. I think to myself as I feel even more of those hot tears stream down my face. I can't have Peeta see my like this I push the tears back and try to act brave.

"Peeta I will tell you but you have to promise to not get mad at me."

"Katniss please, I love you. What could possibly be so bad?"

My God he has no idea. If he leaves me I will have no one to blame but me. But I don't have a choice, if I don't tell him now then, then I don't know what he will do.

"Peeta, when we were in the arena, I worked out that Haymitch had figured out a system with our sponsors – one kiss = one gift. So I thought that the more I kissed you, even when I didn't want to, we would have a better chance of survival."

I look up at him to see that he looked angry, hurt and confused all at once.

"So that's it then. You never really loved me you just wanted to win. I can't believe you Katniss!"

I watch him get up and head for the door. I run after him a grab his hand before he can go any further.

"Peeta I wasn't finished."

"What Katniss? You're just going to hurt me again."

"No Peeta, because when we were about to eat those berries I realised that, that ..."

"That what Katniss?"

"I realised that I love you."