Disclaimer: None of the characters or settings related to the TV show JONAS belong to me! Please don't sue!

I've always heard horror stories about organising weddings. Normal girls turn into complete bridezillas because the napkins are the wrong shade of white or the gardeners pruned the roses without telling anyone. With only two weeks to go I was expecting Fliss to be in hysterics. I forgot, of course, that Fliss organised people as a job. It should have been no surprise when I walked into Fliss's apartment to see colour-coded files and mood boards all stacked neatly against the wall. My mouth dropped open before I recovered and began to laugh.

"Oh Fliss, you definitely have to plan my wedding for me!" I smile and she puts down her coffee cup and comes over to me.

"Deal." She releases me and we sit down on her sofa. "So, have you found your dress yet?"

"I think Stella would kill me if I didn't use her…" I grin and shake my head, "Apparently she has the perfect outfit lined up."

"Well, as long as you're there and looking hot… I have a cousin or two who I'm dying to introduce to you." Explained Fliss and I immediately groan.

"I'm off men for a while, Fliss, I'm focusing on the dancing." My face breaks into a huge grin, "I had some fab news this morning… I've got funding for the entire of next season! We still need to make ticket sales but we've got a theatre and everything!"

"Elle, that's absolutely fantastic! Still, I'm going to miss you over in England though."

"Did I mention the theatre is off-off Broadway?" I remark innocently and Fliss shrieks wildly.

"No you did not, you little…. Elle, I'm so happy!" She throws her arms around me and laughs, just as Andy walks through the door.

"Oi, that's my girl, Elle… watch where you're putting those hands!" He jokes but Fliss merely runs up to him and grabs his hands before jumping up and down.

"Elle's moving back, Elle's moving back, Elle's moving BACK!"

A smile slides over Andy's face and he winks at me, "What a shame… and I thought I'd finally got rid of her."

He drags Fliss back over to the sofa and they curl into one another. For a second I feel a pang of regret and jealousy. I want a relationship like that, unconditional love and complete understanding. Still, I pull myself out of it and grab my bag, reaching for a sheaf of papers. I did have a reason for coming here after all.

Fliss was keeping her wedding - I say her wedding since Andy wanted absolutely no part in planning it - very traditional and classy. I was unsure if she would like the first dance song I had chosen considering it was a little off-the-wall.

"I found a song that would be perfect for you guys but Fliss, it's not really conventional…"

"I thought as long as the actual wedding was traditional then the reception could be fun so it might be alright. What's the song?" Fliss asks and I brace myself.

"Can I have this dance?" I tell her and Fliss breathes in audibly.

"Yes." She exhales, "Oh yes!"

"You like it?" I check and she nods.

"Oh Andy, it's perfect, isn't it?" She whispers and looks up at him, utter adoration in her eyes. To my surprise Andy Carter, self-confessed cynic and sceptic, merely kisses her on the top of her head and nods.

"Well, I'll get started on the choreography right away – something easy, don't worry…" I direct this at the dance-challenged Andy and he visibly relaxes.

I gather my stuff, getting ready to go to the next Danceheads rehearsal that I had been on the way to when I decided to drop by.

"Oh, by the way, you gave me a plus one, right?" I check and Fliss looks at me quizzically, "Do you mind me asking Abi?"

"Of course not… Elle, you do know that JONAS is invited, yeah?" Fliss looks at me and I inhale sharply.

Nick is going to be there? Nick Lucas? But I'm still not over him! He hates me and he's going to…

Fliss cuts my thought process off with a sympathetic 'It'll be okay' and I smile, gather my bags and exit the room, my head still spinning from the new information. The worst of it was, as much as I never wanted to see him again, some tiny part of me still flutters at the thought of being in the same room as him.

Stupid heart. It needs to get some perspective.

It's getting ridiculous now, this Nick thing. For 10 days straight I've spent two-thirds of every day thinking about him and his stupid band and his stupid car and his stupid hair and his stupid jeans and… you get the picture. I'm driving to get Abigail from the airport and still I'm panicking about seeing him again. I love him; I honestly, truly love him. It's an all-encompassing, overwhelming feeling and I hate it. I'm not in some stupid Taylor Swift song or rom-com movie. This hurts and it's painful and ugly and I need it to stop…

Screech.

I breathe heavily… I just ran a stop sign.

I gently pull my car over and rest my head on the steering wheel. Luckily I was going slowly so the guy coming across had time to swerve and drive on after giving me a very explicit sign with his hands. I so deserved that. For a second, I lift my head and take a deep breath before beginning to cry.

I could have killed someone. But even now, when I'm crying at the side of the road after a bout of dangerous driving, I'm still thinking of Nick and our accident.

"When did you become God? Have you even heard of the sanctity of life? I could have been KILLED! You did this because of some stupid rehearsal?"

I shudder. I was even worse than him; I did it because of a stupid boy. A knocking on the side of my car jolts me away from my pondering.

"Excuse me, Miss, are you okay?" A guy's voice floats in and I turn my head to look at him.

Typical. It's Kevin Lucas.

"Elle?" He exclaims and I answer in shock,

"Kevin? What are you doing here?"

"You ran a stop sign and pulled over; I wanted to make sure you were okay." He explains and I double take.

"You want to make sure that I am okay?" I ask incredulously and he nods before climbing into the passenger side.

"In all fairness, I didn't know it was you when I pulled over." He reasoned.

Yeah, now it makes more sense. After all, why would Kevin want to make sure I'm okay? He hates me. I wipe my crying eyes with some tissue from the glove compartment and take a few deep breaths.

"Well I'm fine now. I was just a little distracted..." I sigh and turn to look at him, "But thank you, you know, for checking on me."

For a moment Kevin searches my face, staring intently at my eyes.

"Everyone makes mistakes." He offers and for a second, our eyes connect and I think he means something more. Then I break eye contact and look down.

"I could have killed that guy." I murmur and bite my lip.

"It was a mistake."

"No, it was more than that. I could have killed him. How can I forgive myself that?" I say to myself, unaware that I'm speaking it out loud.

Looking at the dashboard, I miss Kevin staring at me again. This time he nods and opens the door. Stepping out of the car, I swear I can him talking. I strain my ears to try and hear what he's saying.

"Miss you, Mace." He mumbles as he slams the door shut. As he safely gets into his car, I accelerate away. My thoughts are focused only on the road as I drive extra carefully, anticipating every single driver I meet. It's only when I pull outside the airport and catch sight of Abigail that the full gravity of the situation hits me.

If Abs is surprised at me on the verge of tears in the car she doesn't show it. I carefully drive to the nearest coffee shop and park up before bursting into tears. Gently, Abi unbuckles my seatbelt and lets me cry on top of her for a good ten minutes before her curiosity gets the better of her.

"You want to explain, Elle?" She demands and I sniffle unattractively, wiping my nose with the back of my hand.

"I'm a self-centred, jealous bitch and I don't deserve the friends I have." I summarise and Abi looks at me oddly.

"Whoa. Try again." She tells me and shoots me one of her best glares.

I explain about the stop sign and the constant thoughts of Nick. I touch on Fliss and Andy and how much I miss my relationship with Nick. I spill my heart out to Abi and she just sits there and listens. She doesn't interrupt or cut me off to ask me questions. I pour out all my worries and flaws to her and as I finally come to a stop she just looks at me.

"Oh sweetie." She sighs before hugging me harder for a second.

"Now you listen here, Elle, you are not self-centred and you're not a jealous bitch. Yes, maybe you envy Fliss and Andy's relationship but, honey, who wouldn't? That doesn't make you a bad person. You ran a stop sign. Yes, you could have killed someone but you didn't. Be thankful you didn't and take it as a warning that you need to change something. You have to stop this obsession with Nick. "

I sniffle and nod, taking a deep breath. Obsessing over Nick? It was like I was back at HMA again! What was I doing?

"The truth is that he was awful to you. I was there in that alleyway and you'd just saved his life. He was so out-of-order. I know he's JONAS and for you that means a free pass but if it were me, I'd have slapped him one."

"But I didn't tell him about Macy." I argue and she rolls her eyes.

"So you lied. Big deal. He's the reason you left the country…. don't argue with me about LABAN and opportunities Elle, I know you ran away from HMA because of those people. You're an Anderson now, not a Misa. You're not the same girl who left and Nick needs to recognise that. Can you honestly say that you are Macy Misa now?"

I thought hard about Abi's point. Macy Misa was an obsessive sports fanatic who knocked over the Lucas Brothers on a daily basis. I though over my list of Misa rules again.

A Misa takes things seriously.

A Misa doesn't let out emotions.

A Misa doesn't cry.

A Misa locks away their heart so they don't get hurt.

A Misa is the best.

Did I want Macy to be gone? Had I been hiding under the illusion of Annabelle for too long?

I smiled lightly. I was crying over a broken heart, that's three rules down to start with. And sure, I take my dance seriously but as for life, I learnt how to have real fun in England with Abi and here, with Andy and Fliss. I didn't want to end up like Dad, bitter and alone with nothing but the football on TV. Now I'm still sweet and kind and still have a wicked curveball but I'm more than a Misa. I'm an Anderson.

It's weird to think that Macy Misa is gone. But of course, she isn't and never will be. Macy was my childhood and shaped me as a person. But Elle, she is who I am. Macy hid away from emotion but Elle… no… I embrace it. A Misa thinks emotions made you weak and vulnerable. My beloved Agnes de Mille taught me better. "Many other women kicked higher, balanced longer, or turned faster. These are poor substitutes for passion."

They gave me a list of rules and told me "That's what a Misa does." Well, here's what an Anderson does.

An Anderson laughs… every single day.

An Anderson walks in the rain… because umbrellas aren't necessary.

An Anderson sobs over sad films… because tears have healing properties.

An Anderson falls in love… because it makes you feel alive.

An Anderson is the best they can be and doesn't ask for anything more.

I could go back and be Macy Misa for Nick and Kevin and Joe and Stella but there's one thing a Misa isn't…

No-one ever said a Misa was happy.

"Hey, Abs." I smile, "I'll always be a little bit of a Macy."

"I know."

I continue on, "But I'm Elle now. I'm not forgetting Macy, I'm moving onwards."

"I know."

"But I'm not a Misa. Not anymore." I finish decidedly.

"I know, but you're still crazy." She giggles and after a moment, I join in.

After a few minutes, we both calm down and manage to control ourselves. In that moment, I realise that Abigail is truly my best friend. I have Fliss and Andy and now I guess I have Stella but no one really compares to Abigail. For the first time I properly look at Abigail. She's slightly thinner and she has bags under eyes that have been skilfully disguised with concealer.

"Now tell me what's up with you, Abi?" I ask her quickly and she sighs heavily. For a second I expect her to laugh it off and put it down to late nights at the hospital. Slowly, she explains that her Dad has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's. She's a doctor and she knows the symptoms and complications. She tells me how he doesn't recognise her anymore. She tells me how she tried to talk about it over the phone to me, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. She tells me she doesn't want it to be real. For the second time, we're crying in my car, but now Abigail is the distraught one and I'm desperately trying to comfort her. Except I can't. Nothing I can say makes it any better. So we sit and I let her cry and eventually we both stop crying and wipe our eyes.

"Since we've sat in the car park for, like, an hour, we'd better go and get some coffee." I swing the car door open and Abi laughs softly and follows my lead. Just before my legs hit the tarmac, my phone goes off. It's Fliss.

"Hey Fliss… Whoa, calm down Fliss… Fliss, stop crying, is someone hurt?..." I try and make sense of the conversation but the only words I can hear make no sense. Something about ruffles and shoulder pads. Finally, Fliss makes her sentence coherent.

"They sent me the wrong dress!" She sobs and suddenly, I picture Fliss in a tearful heap on the floor, surrounded by trashed mood boards and ripped up folders. "Elle, it has shoulder pads… and ruffles down the arms and… oh my GOD!" She shrieks and I wince.

"Fliss, what is it?" I ask and the sobbing becomes louder. I can only make out two words. I motion Abi to get back into the car.

"Fliss, darling, both Abi and I are on our way… just don't panic!" I tell her and put the phone down before speeding away.

"Elle, what on earth is going on?" Abi asks and I say one sentence that no bride ever wants to hear.

"Her dress has a butt bow."

We're only five minutes away from Fliss's house and Abi is on the phone to Andy. Our main issue is that Andy can't see the dress so Fliss is having hysterics alone and refusing to let Andy in. It's only as we pass a row of boutiques that my brain kicks into gear.

"What am I doing?" I mutter and hit the steering wheel.

"Erm, driving to see Fliss?" Abi interjects and I shake my head at her before performing a highly illegal U-turn.

"We have a fashion emergency. We forgot Stella."

Immediately Abi gets it and quickly relays the message to Andy who relays it to Fliss through the door.

"Andy says hurry. She's on the verge of a breakdown." Abi tells me and put my foot down, feeling happy that at least Stella and Fliss live close to each other. Five minutes later and we are screeching into the building's car park. Both Abi and I run for the door and panting, I lean on her buzzer.

No reaction.

I lean on it again and again until Stella's voice sounds down the line.

"Hey Stella, it's me, Elle. You have to let me up." I pant.

"Oh Elle," She whispers, "Now really isn't a good time."

"But Stells, it's an emergency." I beg.

"Erm, just give me a minute…" She trails off and I completely lose it.

"STELLA MALONE, OPEN THIS DOOR NOW!" I shriek and am rewarded with a satisfying buzz and a 'don't say I didn't warn you…' from Stella. I sprint up the stair, Abi following but not quite as quickly. Breathing heavily, I throw open her door only to see the entire of JONAS sat on the sofa with her… including Nick Lucas. Could this day get any worse?

Amazingly enough, the sheer stress of the situation makes me forget my Nick obsession and I look straight at Stella, who gasps.

"Oh my gosh, Elle, are you alright?" She screams at me.

Stella being Stella, she has a mirror right by the door, just so she could check she looked perfect before she left. Right now, I was looking less than perfect. I was bright red from running up three flights of stairs, my cheeks and eyes were all blotchy, red and swollen from mine and Abi's crying session just 30 minutes earlier and I had major mascara issues that showed the tear tracks down my face.

"Was it the car accident?" Kevin asks and Stella snaps her head at him.

"CAR ACCIDENT? YOU DIDN'T TELL ME!" She screams louder and I wince on Kevin's behalf.

From somewhere next to Kevin, I hear someone softly say, "She was in a car accident?" but right now I really don't care.

Abi comes panting through the door and I can see she's in a similar state to me, except her hair is still in it's normal, cute, curly state whereas mine has escaped it's ponytail so that I look a tiny bit like a lion… okay, so a lot like a lion.

"ABI? WERE YOU IN THE ACCIDENT TOO?" Stella continues yelling, body slumped against the sofa back, and Abi looks at me funnily.

"Stop sign." I mouth and she nods lightly before shaking her head at Stella. To add to the drama, apparently Abi can't breathe after running all that way. She sits on the floor, taking enormous breaths and Kevin walks over to her, and begins to put her into the recovery position, which Abi seems to take offence to. Gathering all my breath, I scream one last word.

"STOP!"

Everyone freezes.

"Kevin, Abi is conscious so please stop putting her into the recovery position. Joe, Stella has NOT fainted so throwing a glass of water in her face will only result in your murder, that dress is dry-clean only. Abi, for goodness's sake get off the floor! You came up three flights of stairs; you did not run a marathon. Try going to the gym once in a while. And Stella, do you really think that if I'd been in an accident that I wouldn't go to, oh I don't know, THE HOSPITAL first?" I finish and everyone is looking at me open-mouthed.

"You told me there was an emergency… what was I supposed to think?" Stella grumbles.

"Stella… Fliss just tried on her wedding dress… it has a butt bow."

"BUTT BOW?" She screams and I wince visibly this time. Never mind me being in a car accident, this is so much worse.

"Let's get going!" Stella shouts and marshals the boys off the sofa, "A butt bow… what on earth was she thinking?"

"It has shoulder pads too!" Abi adds, trying to be helpful whilst still trying to catch her breath. Poor Stella's face contorts in pain and she immediately heads towards the door but Abi stops her. Clearly the previous sentence was too much because she could manage two words.

"Two seats." She wheezes and I smack my palm into my face.

"My car only has two seats." I explain but looking at Abi, she waves me on. Pointing to herself and then the sofa, I deduce that she's going to stay here. I blow her a kiss before Stella marches me out the door. I shake my head, wondering if I dare tell her about the ruffles…

As I finally pull up outside Fliss's apartment, both Stella and I leap out of the car and head for the stairs. As we round the last corner, I can hear a hysterical Fliss sobbing.

"Fliss… Let me in, Sweetie…" I pant and bang my head on the door as she continues sobbing.

"I don't want you to see it…" She cries and Andy throws his hands up in the air.

"Felicity! I did not speed all the way from the airport, run up six flights of stairs, meet my ex-boyfriend and leave Abi ALONE with the Lucas Brothers for you to just send me away." I screech but still Fliss doesn't reply. "I brought Stella…."

Suddenly, the door is unlocked and Stella and I barge in before Fliss locks it again. Whilst I help Fliss over to the sofa, Stella immediately makes a beeline for the dress.

"Well, it doesn't look too… ELLE! You didn't mention the ruffles!" She screams before stuffing it back into the bag it came with. Meanwhile, I shove a glass of water into Fliss's hand before letting Andy in. He wastes no time in enveloping Fliss in his arms and she leans in and, for the first time, attempts to stop crying.

"You know, you could wear a sack to walk up the aisle and I wouldn't care," Andy whispers to Fliss and both Stella and I smile, "even it were a sack with a butt bow. You're going to be the most beautiful girl there."

"But I want our wedding to be perfect…" Fliss croaks.

She looks up at him watery-eyed and Andy kisses her lightly, "The only thing I care about is that you get up the aisle and we end up married. As long as that happens, the wedding will be perfect… I promise.

"Do you guys have a four-seater?" Stella asks and Andy nods, "Do you mind if we go to my apartment because I need to take a good look at this dress. I think I can save it…" She trails off as Fliss immediately jumps up and grabs the keys.

"Let's go." She says and we all hurry out of the door.

On the way over I try and fix my make-up so I look less like an escaped convict. There is an awkward quiet as Andy whispers comfortingly to Fliss and Stella slowly peruses the dress. I just rub at my mascara, desperate to get out of the car and back home with Abi.

We take the stairs much slower this time, Fliss and I carrying the dress between us. I dread to think what poor Abi has been doing, stuck in a roomful of Lucas Brothers.

"… And then she decided it would be a good idea to dye her hair…" Abi giggles, "The green hair set off the pink of her costume beautifully!"

"Abigail!" I exclaim, "What are you doing?"

"Well, Joe was telling me about you in high school and showing me some pictures. You never told me you played American Football." Abi smiles innocently.

I immediately round on Joe, "Why did you tell her that?"

"And, apparently, you were a good girl. No drinking, no going out, very focused on sports… I thought they should know about the real Elle…" Abigail continues and I blush bright red.

"They particularly enjoyed my video of you playing Ring of Fire." She bites her lip and I stalk over to her.

"You told me that was between us! You told me you deleted it!" I shriek and she stands up and hides behind the sofa.

"Especially when I told them about when you had to go on stage, still drunk with hair that you'd accidentally dyed green." She ducks and I make a flying leap at the sofa.

"Abigail! How could you?" I tackle her but she squirms away.

"That's nothing, compared to the time she went out after Alex dumped her and she refused to walk home so we had to wheel her home in a shopping trolley." Andy interjects brightly.

"Oh yeah, well the first time you hit on Fliss she called you creepy." I shoot back and he looks wounded.

"Flissy? She wouldn't do that to me, would she?" He pouts dramatically and Fliss giggles loudly.

I scramble after Abi who has hidden in the kitchen.

"I bet you all want to hear about Abigail, I mean remember that night… in London… with the…" I tease and she colours.

"I didn't know he was a drag queen!" She counters and I finally manage to catch her.

"We were in a gay bar!" I laugh and pull her back into the living room.

All three Lucas Brothers are staring at me in complete confusion. I try my best not to look at Nick, focusing mainly on Joe. I'm trying to stay positive.

"So… this dress is heinous." Stella breaks in, "You can't wear it."

"Hold on a second, Stella. Abigail made out with a drag queen?" Andy asks and Abi hits me.

"He wasn't in drag at the time! He said he was doing it so he could pay his university fees…" She admits, "We're still Facebook friends actually."

"What? Seriously?" I counter, "Did he ever pass his Archaeology exam?"

"Yes! He's working at the British Museum though he still dances on the side. He says he can't give up the money…"

I nod thoughtfully, "That's cool."

Now Joe is clearing his throat and I look at him curiously, "C'mon Joe. You guys must have some fun drunk stories?"

"Well, the legal drinking age is 21 over here…" He offers, "I guess we were all kind of busy. You know, tours and stuff."

A heavy silence falls over the room. Both Fliss and Andy shoot pitying looks at Joe whilst Abi awkwardly twirls one of her curls around her finger. I stub my toe into the carpet, looking down to avoid Joe's gaze.

"Regardless," Stella snaps bossily, "What are we going to do about your dress, Fliss."

"Well, we could burn it." She laughs shakily, "Though I should send it back to the company and get a refund."

Stella cocks her head thoughtfully, looking Fliss up and down, "I suppose I could try a wedding dress.."

"I can't ask you to do that, Stella." Fliss shakes her head but Stella is already searching for a measuring tape.

"If she's got the measuring tape, you can't say no." Nick says quietly and I snap my head to look at him, meeting his eyes for the first time.

A bolt of pain shoots through me as our eyes connect and I take a sharp breath. I need to get out of here right now. I break our eye contact and check my watch.

"So, I have rehearsal in minus twenty minutes, I need to get going before Trace decides it's an off day." I give a quick wave, "Andy, could you give Abi a lift back to mine?" I beg him and he nods, winking at Abi.

"Your car's at mine still, right?" He checks, "You going to take a taxi?"

"Yeah, I'll drop by later." I smile and pull my hair down so I can retie it up, "Is that alright?"

"I could drive your car!" Abi chirps and I swing round to face her.

I sigh, "Absolutely not."

"But Elle, I'm a brilliant driver, it's only roundabouts I can't do." She grabs my hand and I giggle.

"Luckily, they don't have roundabouts over here. But still no, I remember what you did to my last car." I toss my keys to Andy, before making a quick getaway.

"That was the squirrel's fault..." Floats down as I jog down the stairs and hail a cab.

Sitting in the backseat, I close my eyes in triumph. I did not let Nick get to me, I did not let the Lucas brothers get to me, I'm not even thinking about... oh wait, I am.

Two weeks to the wedding. It's going to be a disaster...

Author's note: The holidays are back around... finally. I will finish both this story and All the World's A Stage in the near future, I promise, so hang on in there if you're still enjoying them. Thank you to everyone who has been so patient and understanding; I love you all!

XOXO Vi