A/N: This is the little paradoxical surprise I told you about last week, not only because of the format, but for the bittersweetness of it all. I have so loved this story, and I had MEGA-fun with it. But in case you don't know me, I don't leave any story hanging. Besides, I want to have more time to work on my upcoming stories. (And, oh, by the way, before I forget and if any of you don't know, all three seasons of Danny Phantom are now available from Amazon! I was so excited when I found that out that I just had to get them! YIPEE!) Ahem, sorry. Enough commercials and back to reality. So, in a nutshell and as you can see, the chapter's title says it all. IDNOAC and, of course, ENJOY! And, of course I can't forget to wish a very Happy Birthday to America! Happy Fourth of July! 234 years strong!
Danny Phantom Bloopers—Chapter 40—It's a Wrap
Bloopers 201 to ?
Behind the Scenes and on the set of Frightmare with truephan
Really, this is sorta truephan's dream-come-true….
TRUEPHAN: Hello, Danny Phandom! You're not going to BELIEVE what happened! When the cast and crew of the Danny Phantom series heard about this story covering all of their bloopers, they were way too eager to grant me the unique privilege of interviewing them about their reaction to this story….The interview was….uh, one-of-a-kind… to say the least. And how appropriate it was that they granted me the interview during the shooting of one of my fav episodes, Frightmare….Well, with that, ROLL it, Marv!
*film rattling*
Truephan walks onto the set of Casper High's cafeteria, the camera following closely behind her. She is giggling like the very excitable phan that she is….
TRUEPHAN (turning to the camera and giggling the entire time while speaking): OHMYGOSH! I can't BELIEVE I'm here! This is SOOO Cool! Uh, ahem, focus!
She then sees Butch, Danny, Sam, Tucker and Jazz and screams in delight.
The cast and crew immediately look over to see what kind of loon honked like that (too bad for truephan that her scream DOES sound like a loon!).
TRUEPHAN (blushing but still giggling ridiculously): Hello, everybodee! I'm truephan!
The cast and crew look confused and don't say anything.
TRUEPHAN (clueless that they have no idea what she's talking about): You know! The phan who wrote about all of those bloopers about the show. You know. Danny Phantom Bloopers that has been posted on Fanfiction for a few months now?
Finally, Butch nods his head with the vague recollection. He walks toward truephan, followed by Danny in ghost form, Sam, Tucker and Jazz.
BUTCH: Oh, yeah. You're the craz—I mean-the creative author who wasted, er, wanted to honor us like that, right?
TRUEPHAN (chuckles in embarrassment): Well, what a nice thing to say! But I can't take all of the credit. Nicktendo Squad was really the brains behind all of this, you know. She just let me take the story over after Chapter 9.
BUTCH (murmuring under his breath): Oh, THAT would explain why it went all downhill after Chapter 9. (now speaking louder) AHEM! Oh, that's right! Well, we're glad you're here, aren't we, gang?
DANNY, TUCKER, SAM and JAZZ (in unison): Yeah! All right! I guess! Can't wait!
Truephan beams in delight. But everyone else just stands there in silence again.
TRUEPHAN: (finally breaking the silence, but sheepishly so) Well, heh-heh, I am here for that interview…uhm…can we go sit down somewhere?
BUTCH: (pointing the way) We can go over there.
Everyone walks over to some chairs just at the edge of the cafeteria. Most of them have the cast's names on it. Truephan is so excited when she notices them that she sits right next to Danny's chair. But she doesn't notice that she has just sat upon Butch's chair. Butch frowns a bit but doesn't say anything. He sits in another chair and then all the crew, including Stan the Prop Man, Van the Camera Man, and Jan the Edit Man also come up, stand next to everyone and watch.
Once again, there is an awkward silence as truephan fumbles in her fluorescent green tote bag for the list of questions she has planned to ask.
TRUEPHAN (shuffling papers and mumbling): Now, where is it? (now very excitedly) Oh, here it is! Okie-dokie, are y'all ready?
Everyone present either nods his or her head or answers with a 'yes'.
TRUEPHAN: Okie-dokie. This first question is for Butch—man, that's SOO cool! I just called you by your first name!
Butch rolls his eyes but smiles just the same.
TRUEPHAN: Anyways, you were able to read my story recording all those bloopers, right?
BUTCH: That's right. Though I must say…
TRUEPHAN (interrupting him with a grin): I'm sure that you took them in stride, even though those real bloopers I reported must have been a major embarrassment for you, huh?….
BUTCH (frowning in slight irritation, but trying to hide it since he is on camera): Uh,….
TRUEPHAN (interrupting again, still with a smile on her face): After all, if you would have taken the storyline for Danny Phantom more seriously, then you would have made more of an effort to edit those bloopers...
BUTCH: (working hard at not frowning more): Wait a…
TRUEPHAN (nodding her head): You're right! You should have waited to personally re-check those episodes. After all, you owed it to your phans, you know, for the legacy of it all, or some such nonsense...
BUTCH (gritting his teeth in growing irritation): I think you should….
TRUEPHAN (waving her hand flippantly, obviously not having heard him, and then sighing): Oh, well, there's nothing you can do about it now, huh? And it did give me great fodder for this story, so without them, there really wouldn't be a story and I wouldn't be here right now, now would I? SOO, the legacy will have to be just a teensy-weensy, itty-bitty, little lame—but lovingly so…Hey, I just did some rhyming and alliteration in the same breath! (looks back down at her list of questions)
Butch silently gets up and heads toward the cafeteria set. Truephan looks up, ready to ask him the next question. She frowns a bit when she can see that Butch has left the scene.
TRUEPHAN (not at all bothered): Oh, did he get hungry? Heh-heh, good thing for him that there is a cafeteria nearby, huh?
The rest of the crew tries to keep a forced smile on their faces. Truephan then turns right to Danny.
TRUEPHAN: Hey, Danny, now I have another question from my "list of questions to ask the DP crew". Isn't that soo awesome that I have my own 'list of list-thingies' like you?
DANNY: (a bit confused about her question): Uh, sure.
Truephan looks at him a bit dreamy-eyed and phan-struck, forgetting to get on with the questions.
DANNY: (frowning a bit in embarrassment and rubbing the back of his neck): Ah, aren't you still going to do that interview thing?
TRUEPHAN (snapping out of it): OH! That's right. Sorry. Ahem. Well, I have to thank another phan, Glofish, for this question.
Danny arches up one of his eyebrows, afraid to ask more.
TRUEPHAN: Anyhow, Glofish says he—or she—You know, I really don't know if Glofish is a guy or gal. Anyhow, I'll just call him—or her—Glofish, then, OK?
Danny shrugs.
TRUEPHAN (smiling): Well, anyways, quite a while back Glofish wanted to me to report on a blooper that had to do with your forgetting about the cable around your waist that help you to fly, and then you get tangled up and crash. But I just told him, er, her, er, Glofish that I just want her—him—Glofish—and now you—to know that I know that you really fly and so don't need any cables! So, it's funny that people think you need cables, right?
Danny smiles in triumph.
TRUEPHAN (snorting a bit in amusement): I mean, you crash into things all by yourself without any lame excuse that you got tangled in non-existent cables, huh?
This time, Danny frowns in disapproval.
TRUEPHAN (oblivious to his response and still smiling): Well, anyways, could you tell all your phans what your fav blooper was?
The camera pans right to his face and Danny instantly smiles.
DANNY: Gee, I've never thought about it before. I guess that any one of them where I pulled a prank on Vlad or Stan the Prop Man would be my favorite.
TRUEPHAN (pausing at first, but then smiling again): Well, I can't say that I'm not surprised, especially after what happened to poor Stan. (snorting in jest) After all, we all know how teenage boys are, being so immature and awkward and all! So, what else can we expect from you?
Danny's eyes flare green.
TRUEPHAN (this time seeing Danny's response): You know, everyone says you look so cute when you do that thing with your eyes. And you know, they are sooo right! Tee-hee!
Danny frowns but since Truephan has immediately looked down to see what her next question will be, she doesn't see that.
DANNY (grumbling under his breath): I wonder if she's related to Stan the Prop Man!
TRUEPHAN (triumphantly): Heard that! Do you think I could be? Gee, I'll have to ask Aunt Mabel who's in charge of our genealogy! But anyhow, I have a few more follow up questions about some bloopers that some of the loyal phans just alerted me about and I haven't been able to cover yet. I'm sure the phans would love to hear the explanation right from you! I can even directly quote your response! How cool is that?
Danny rolls his eyes and this time puts on a fake grin.
TRUEPHAN (only noticing Danny's smile): Oh, I see you agree! Goodie! OK, this one was brought up by a very brilliant and observant friend of my, Angelus-alvus!
Danny frowns in confusion but then smiles again right away.
TRUEPHAN: Well, anyhow, AA—hey, did you know that person let's me call him, uh, that person AA? —isn't that so neat?
Still with the fake smile, Danny shrugs.
TRUEPHAN: Well, anyhow, he says that happened in "Reign Storm". It's in the scene where you blast Vlad out of the ghost shield just outside of your house when you were about to confront him about the Ring of Rage.
DANNY: Oh, yeah! That was right after Valerie got hurt the first time and we were all safe in my home because of the ghost shield. And then I called Vlad out to the front of my house to get him to come clean, but he wouldn't, so I zapped the streetlight so that I could zap him and...
TRUEPHAN (interrupting and frowning with irritation): You're drifting off the point here, Danny!
Danny frowns in irritation but shuts up.
TRUEPHAN (smiling again): Well, anyhow, did you ever notice that when you zapped Vlad out of the ghost shield, your ecto-blast actually went through the ghost shield? It's not supposed to do that...unless you're so much stronger than we all thought!
Danny smiles and then blushes at the compliment.
TRUEPHAN: Either that, or your father goofed up again, so much so that either the shield had a hole right there or it was so weak a baby could have pushed through it!
Danny frowns again.
TRUEPHAN (glancing at her next question): Oh, here's another blooper!
DANNY (rolling his eyes and sighing): Does there have to be?
TRUEPHAN (oblivious to what he said): And this blooper was spotted by that very clever phan, Pii. (turning and looking right into the camera with a big smile) By the way, Pii, did I ever tell you that I think you had a very cool name?
DANNY (smiling sarcastically): Uh, aren't you drifting away from the point there, truephan?
TRUEPHAN (clearing her voice and frowning in irritation): Hmph! Yey, well, whatever. (sarcastically) Now, to the point: in 'Fenton Menance', when Jazz was telling us about your thinking you were imagining ghosts in the first scene, you were about to crash into the Fenton RV head-on, but in the actual 'real' flashback you were going to crash into the Fenton RV with your feet leading the way! I don't get it. That was a very big blooper! Can you tell the phans what really happened?
DANNY (deadpans): Maybe Jazz just remembered it wrong?
TRUEPHAN (blinking a bit in disbelief): Well, that might explain it...But I thought they stopped the scene before you actually hit the windshield because you really didn't want to hurt that cutesy-wootsy little boy's face of yours!
Danny frowns in irritation again.
TRUEPHAN (cheerfully oblivious): Tee-hee, I'm so glad you are a little vain like that. Anyhow, I'm done with your questions for now, Danny!
Danny grumbles under his breath, but truephan immediately turns away from him and toward Jazz. Danny uses the opportunity to leave the scene.
TRUEPHAN (grinning): Well, really, I was really going to ask you the same thing as your brother, Jazz: that is, what your favorite blooper was...
Jazz opens her mouth to answer, only to be interrupted by Truephan.
TRUEPHAN (grinning more): But really, I think I owe the phandom to point out another blooper that hasn't been covered, but has to do with you, OK?
JAZZ (dumbfounded as she slowly responds): OOO-kay.
TRUEPHAN (happily): YAY! Well, we all know that you weren't consistent in what you wanted to be when you grew up. And as a matter of fact, I document these three things you said you wanted to be: 1. A brain surgeon in the '13' episode, 2. a Yale professor in this very own 'Frightmare' episode set we're on—NEAT!—and, 3. in most of the episodes, a psychologist. So, which is it? You should be old enough by now to figure out what you want to do with your life! But I think you need to become a psychologist because obviously you're having issues with decision-making.
Jazz frowns in irritation.
TRUEPHAN (holding her hands up and waving them in surrender): Sorry, but those are your issues, not mine!
Truephan then turns to Sam, not noticing that Jazz has also left the area.
TRUEPHAN (sweetly): And speaking of 'issues', there's Sam!
Sam immediately scrunches her face in disapproval, but truephan, who glanced down at her paper again, doesn't see that.
TRUEPHAN: But you know, Sam, I think all of us phans really saw through you in all those shows! I must say that you weren't too good at hiding your true feelings about Danny, which, by the way, I think is very sweet! (suddenly cheering) Danny and Sam 4EVER! Ahem, well, yeah. But really, Sam, don't you think that you're really like an egg that's hard on the outside but all gushy on the inside? Oh, wait a minute! I forgot! Ha-ha! You're an ultra recycle-vegetarian, right? Maybe you don't eat eggs.
Sam draws her hands in a fist but keeps a forced smile on her face. And before she can do or say anything, truephan interrupts her…
TRUEPHAN: OK, then you're really a marshmallow under a hard candy shell. The reason I feel that way is because of how you acted in "Life Lessons", especially when you were all cuddly with 'Lilith'. Really? For a sack of flour? C'mon, Sam, there's my proof...admit it!
Sam growls under her breath in irritation and stomps away...
TRUEPHAN (triumphantly): I KNEW it!
Truephan glances at her list of questions again.
TRUEPHAN (a little too loudly) Oh, yeah! Tucker!
TUCKER (jumps a bit at her loudness and then a little nervously): Y-Yeah?
Truephan blinks, wondering what he's so nervous about. But then she shrugs.
TRUEPHAN: Now, then, Tucker, what was your favorite blooper?
TUCKER (smugly while lifting his PDA up to his cheek): Any one of them that featured my fabulous PDA, of course!
TRUEPHAN (unimpressed): I don't remember any bloopers about that. BUT. Speaking of that PDA, is that thing for real or just a deus ex machina used to come up with solutions in a hurry?
TUCKER (confused): Uhhhh, what's a deus ex-wha-wha?
Truephan blinks incorrigibly as if Tucker's from another planet. Tucker frowns.
TRUEPHAN (realizing he's serious): You know, that's Latin for "god from the machine" which is a plot device whereby a seemingly inextricable problem is suddenly and abruptly solved with the contrived and unexpected intervention of some new character, ability, or object, which in this case would be an object: your PDA. You should have known all that since you were bombarded with all that knowledge from the Cramtastic Mark 5 in "Fanning the Flames".
This time, Tucker blinks incorrigibly at truephan as if she's from another planet.
TRUEPHAN (shrugging): Well, OK. Maybe. But hey! Just where did you get that PDA, Tucker?
TUCKER (smiling again): So glad you asked that! I got if from Skultech 9.0 in that episode called His Own Worst Enemy.
TRUEPHAN (scratching her head): Don't recall that one. Anyways, so are you saying that you really are only as smart as your PDA is, then? Gee, I totally disagree with you, dude! I had always thought you were very smart, especially because of your brain infusion in the "Fanning the Flames" episode and not just a comical relief like the series always had you as.
Tucker frowns in irritation again and shoves his PDA back into his pants pocket before walking away.
TRUEPHAN (calling after him): Sorry that the truth isn't comical relief enough for you, dude! Oh well.
She glances around and finally notices that the only people left are part of the crew; namely: Stan the Prop Man, Van the Camera Man and Jan the Edit Man. She frowns at first before brightening with a huge smile again.
TRUEPHAN (addressing Stan, Van, and Jan): Well, guys, I hadn't planned on interviewing you, but now that I think about it, it might be a good idea for the phans to get to know you a bit more. After all, we really feel you're just like family to us, too!
The three men shift a bit uncomfortably.
TRUEPHAN (smiling): So, some phans asked me if you were brothers. Are you?
They all shake their head in a 'no' gesture.
TRUEPHAN (slightly sighing): That's a relief! I was feeling sorry for you at first, wondering what your parents must have looked like after seeing your big noses or large ears or that balding head! So, come to think of it, maybe I don't want to be related to you, Stan!
All three frown disapprovingly.
TRUEPHAN (nonchalantly): Still, y'all really made us laugh in all of those bloopers! (snickering) Heh-heh! Make me wonder why you weren't fired long before now!
STAN THE PROP MAN (shrieking a bit): That's it! I'm outta here!
TRUEPHAN (giggling as she watches Stan stomps off): Hey, you said that just like one of those bloopers! That is SOOO awesome!
But when she turns back to Van and Jan, she sees that they, too, have left. But then, she quickly directs the camera to pan to the right. Most—except one—of the cast and the crew are slowly walking back to her with their hands behind their back.
TRUEPHAN (looks at the camera excitedly): Oh, look, everybodee's coming back! How cool is that?
Everyone walks up to her. But then, truephan notices that everyone is smiling at her a little too earnestly. In fact, it creeps her out a little.
TRUEPHAN (a little nervously): Uh, I didn't miss an interview with anyone else, did I?
SAM (dryly): Lucky them.
They all then bring their hands forward and most of them are carrying very large bowls. Still not liking how they are smiling, truephan suddenly cringes.
TRUEPHAN (eyes widening): Hey, heh-heh, guys! That was a great interview! You know it was all just in fun, doncha?
They all slowly shake their heads in denial.
TRUEPHAN (chuckling nervously): Now, you're kidding, right? Those were really innocent questions. Don't tell me you were upset by that?
The cast and crew smile wickedly and nod their heads in agreement this time as they ready they reach into the each of their very large bowls...
TRUEPHAN (finally realizing she has touched too many touchy nerves): Oh, c'mon, guys! It was all in fun….(eyes widen as most of the cast gets closer)….I mean, I don't blame you, really. I used to get upset with all those bloopers from the show, because I really love the show and want to be proud of it. But now that I've written this story…..(Now the entire crew has joined them and they are closing in)…uh, now, uh, now, I think having all those bloopers makes your show more endearing….and uh, charming!
The cast and crew then bombard her with food!
TRUEPHAN: (alarmed): Remember, we're still on camera!
The cast and crew don't stop.
TRUEPHAN (now covered with food running off of her) All right! ALL RIGHT! Food fight! I can take a hint! But I thought we were on the set for Frightmare, not Mystery Meat?
The cast throws even more food at her. Finally, they're done and grin in triumph over her…
TRUEPHAN (sniffing a bit as the food drips off and looking a bit dejected into the camera): OK, gang, thanks for the interview, anyways. And thank you again to Nicktendo Squad for letting me take this over. I hope you are pleased. And I can't forget to thank all of my loyal readers for, well, reading! But I especially thank all the brave souls who sent a review—and then got my response! Nevertheless, these special readers are AWESOMETASTICAL and I would like to give them WHOOHOOTASTICAL thanks to them by name, in order of their appearance in this entire show and endeavor (pulls out very long list) Ahem, and be patient a bit, K? Here we go: pearl84, PunkMichPhantom, acosta perez jose ramiro, BrandyMyDog, Nicktendo Squad, Queen S of Randomness 016, Nano Phantom, Queen Skellington, Squirrel holding a bazooka, Trinity Fenton-Phantom, Dianne Phantom27, animephoenix2468, stick fight3, Mischievia Samantha Fenton, I'm-paranormal33, Angelus-alvus, angel-of-the-obvious, Kassandra-Nichole, Linzerj loves Warriors, Princess of Rose, Bluegoo2, Max Ride 101, WhyCantIJustBePerfect, ghostgal14, LindseyJ, Serial-Doodler, EchoHeart, Glofish, aryaneragon4ever, Pii, Shadeslayer, TheChickKingingtheSodaMachine, inukagome15, Kitty Ghost, CaliforniaGrl and last, but not least, russiandani! …And very special KUDOS to all those who gave me such TERRIFIC ideas to work with! YOU ROCK…..Now, don't forget to look for my next adventure, co-written by one of my personal favorite FF authors, pearl84, called 'Seeing is disBelieving'. I hope we will be posting within the next couple of weeks. I'm very excited and honored to have undertaken this endeavor with such an AWESOME writer! I hope you join us, and REMEMBER, it will be posted under her name, not mine; that is, pearl84. But when you read that story, just remember that I had my paws all over it, too!
But as Truephan is still talking, Danny finally comes flying over to her and quickly hovers above her with an extremely large bowl in his hands and a mischievous grin on his face.
TRUEPHAN (looking briefly upward when she sees him and then back at the camera again, sighing in resignation): Well, I was wondering where he was and...I guess I did deserve it!
She's then covered in a downpour of green ectoplasmic goo from above.
TRUEPHAN: (spitting out excess goo from her mouth as she wipes her eyes): It's a wrap!
THE END
*film rattles a bit more before coming back into focus.*
Truephan has a towel over her ectoplasmic goo-covered head and checks over her shoulder before turning to look straight at the camera. No one appears to be around her.
TRUEPHAN: (whispering to camera) Or, I just might get back at them with more bloopers in some kind of post script…you never know!
ENTIRE DANNY PHANTOM CAST AND CREW (in unison): HEARD THAT!
Truephan runs away and off camera, screaming in fear, as the entire cast and crew of the Danny Phantom animation series runs after her.