Disclaimer: Nope...not mine.

Author's Note: So I think this is the last chapter. I might add on a short one after this, but I think this is a good place to leave it for now. Please R&R and enjoy!

My mouth tastes like Jack Daniel's as I hear my phone going off in the living room of my apartment. I fell asleep on my couch last night with a half-full glass of Jack forgotten on the coffee table. I rub my eye and reach for my phone that is on the other side of the end table. "Hello." I say into the receiver while I try to find my watch to check the time.

"Cameron, where are you?" Foreman asks at the same moment I realize that it is ten thirty. I was supposed to be at work two hours ago.

"Shit!" I say to no one in particular. "I'm on my way." With that I hang up my phone and run to the bathroom to take the quickest shower of my life. Even though it would be better to just get dressed, I don't need House asking me why I smell like whiskey on a Wednesday morning.

I finally end up running into the conference room at eleven fifteen. It's vacant. I let out a sigh because I know that it will now be my task to find them and get up to speed on what's been happening with our patient…that is once I find everyone. Another mission that I have made for myself is to avoid Cuddy. I don't think that I can look her in the eyes right now.

The first place I check is the lab. Foreman is in there alone and so I push open the door and he gives me a nod as I walk toward him. "What's going on with the patient?" I ask as I pick up the blue case file that he set down next to the microscope.

"Just waiting for the results on the aspiration stain." He answers without looking at me.

"Bone marrow aspiration?" I say looking again over the chart in my hands. "Is House thinking Myelofibrosis?" It would make sense, the shortness of breath, the high body temperature, and the enlargement of the liver and spleen.

"Yeah and look I'm not going to pretend like House isn't pissed that you were late this morning, but in saying that I am not getting involved." He says as he quickly makes eye contact with me and then turns back to the microscope.

"He was seriously upset? But you've been late and Chase has—"

"I'm not getting involved…why I said that. Test's positive." Foreman says as he leans back in his chair. "The marrow shows chromosomal abnormalities."

"We're going to have to start her on Hydroxyurea." I say plainly. "I'll go tell House."

With that I leave the lab and head back up to the conference room. I take the back stairwell so that I lessen the possibility of running into Cuddy on the main stairs. I swing open the door to House's office to find him playing with his ball on his chair. "Its Myelofibrosis. We're going to start her on Hydroxyurea and continue to monitor her spleen for a few days."

"Glad to hear it." He says with a toss of the ball above his head. "You're off the case." He finishes as though it is the most natural thing to finish off approval with.

"What?" I ask as my mind still tries to process what he just said.

"You're off the case." He repeats with no change in his tone.

"Why?" I stammer before I can realize the words are out of my mouth.

"You missed a differential. You were two hours late to work. And you're hung over and in no case to practice. You can go home now." He says with a sigh and a nod of his head.

"Is this supposed to be funny?" I ask and I hope he doesn't pick up on the confusion and anger that's flying around in my head. Neither of these emotions necessarily directed toward him.

"It wasn't supposed to be funny haha." He says with a straight face and then continues tossing his ball in the air.

I don't know what made me do it; I don't know why I thought it would be a good idea. But his nonchalance at dismissing me mixed with the frustration of my girlfriend deciding she wants nothing to with me drives me to it. So I reach out and swat hard at the red and gray tennis ball while its mid air. It flies into the glass wall with a thud and I let out a self-satisfied sigh before turning and leaving the room. I throw my lab coat onto the coat rack in the corner and grab my coat and bag in pretty much the same manner. As I storm through the lobby I can hear her heels from behind me. "Dr. Cameron." She says. I keep walking. "Dr. Cameron." She says again with a little more emphasis this time.

I stop but refuse to turn around. She can learn what its like to chase after me for a change. "Can I talk to you in my office, please?" She says with her business voice. I don't turn to look at her. I am afraid if I do the anger will come back. As angry as I am at her and House and this whole mess that my life has made of itself I don't want to say anything that will drive a bigger wedge between Lisa and I. I don't sit down in my usual spot as we enter her office and I think that she notices. She sits down on the couch and looks up at me expectantly as if she wanted me to come to her office to talk to her. I get a feeling I know what's coming.

"Why did you leave last night?" The one question I knew she was going to ask that I know I don't want to hear.

"Because if I was going to sleep alone, I might as well do it in my own bed." I answer back and cross my arms across my chest.

"Allison…" She begins but never develops. She would have nothing to say.

"Listen, I've just been dismissed for the day because I was late for work and missed a ddx. Can we not do this right now?" I don't mean to be snippy but the seething anger has reappeared and it's making it hard for me to look at her. I am torn between walking out her door and never looking back or crawling onto her lap and kissing her senseless. In the end I know I will choose neither. Its just nice to think that I have options sometimes when I know that most of my life I have let my decisions be dictated by other people's emotions.

"Don't be a child, Cameron." Again with the surname. "Not everything is about you." I don't understand what she means by saying that.

"I'm not doing this now." I say. I am about halfway to opening the door when I turn back around and walk towards the couch. When I am standing just in front of her I lean down and take her lips into a soft kiss. Without saying another word, I pick up my bag and I turn and walk out of the room. I hope she knows that I want her to walk after me. I want her to ask me not to go. I want her to follow me to my car and tell me that she is sorry about the way things turned out this past month. I want her to kiss me the way she did in August. I want her to not leave the bed after I make love to her. I wonder how much of that Jack Daniels is left in the bottle on the coffee table.

As it turns out, when I get home the first thing I do is check my e-mail, something I haven't done in a while. I send an e-mail to my brother and ask him what he is up to. I check my inbox every few minutes to see if there is a reply. I move to the bedroom so that I can't see the bottle anymore. When four rolls around, I go for a run. I sit on my couch and eat a hummus and vegetable wrap in my running clothes. I sit on the couch and take a shot. My phone rings around six. "Hello." I cough into the receiver as the Jack burns the back of my throat.

"Can you come over?" Cuddy asks quickly on the other end of the line. The connection crackles.

"You should come over here." So I can ask you to leave or beg you to stay and you will have to think about it. "I shouldn't really drive right now."

"Ummm, okay." She stammers. "I'll be there in twenty."

"Kay." I say and then close the phone. I wonder if she was going to say I love you before she hung up.

Fifteen minutes later and there is a buzz from the intercom that lets me know she has arrived. Without saying anything I buzz her in and lock the deadbolt so that the door is slightly ajar. I hear the door swing open and Cuddy deadbolts it again behind her. When I don't hear footsteps toward the direction of the couch I turn my head to see that she is still standing there. She has hung her coat up on the hook but is still standing by the door. I see she hasn't brought her bag. I try not to speculate about what that means. "Do you want some tea?" I ask as I stand and try to head toward the kitchen. The Jack decides to pick this moment to go straight to my head and I must sway a little bit as I take another step because she is at my side faster than usual.

"Are you okay?" Cuddy asks with a concerned tone. She places her hands on my hips to try and steady me.

"Yep." I smile. "Did you want some tea?" I ask again as I try and twist from her grip and head towards my initial destination.

"Have you been drinking?" Lisa asks with a judgmental furrow in her brow.

"Why not? Its not like I had any work to do today." I know that was the wrong answer but I just…don't know.

I make us both tea and she sits on the couch and waits. I rejoin her on the other end of the couch and hand her her cup. "Thanks." She says and doesn't let her fingers linger on mine.

"Not a problem." I reply.

"What happened today?" She asks after a few minutes of silence filled only by the sounds of us sipping our tea.

"It's a long story." I say.

"Why were you late for work?" Cuddy pries again.

"When I say it's a long story, that isn't code for: I really want to talk about it." I turn and meet her eyes and see a glimmer of hurt and my heart sinks. "I'm sorry." I back peddle. "It's just been a terrible day. I don't mean to take it out on you." I try and meet her eyes again but she is staring at the blank TV. "Lisa?"

"I don't want people to know about us." She blurts out.

"What do you mean?" I ask tentatively.

"I realized the other day when House made it obvious that he knew about us that I could lose my job." She says apologetically. I don't know who is apologizing to. "I don't think I can do that."

"What are you saying?" I know what she is saying in all honesty. I just can't stop my head from wishing that this conversation won't end the way that I think it is going to.

"My job is my life, Allison." She justifies. "I don't know if I can give that up yet or if I will ever be able to."

"I'm not asking you to do that."

"But by loving me, you are. What would the board do if they found out I was sleeping with one of my employees who just happens to be a woman? What happens then? I get to watch my whole life's work go up in smoke because I like your soft skin?" She pauses. "I just don't think I can do that."

"Will you ever be able to?" I breathe. If I had any air in my lungs I would have said it more forcefully.

"I don't know." She answers. At least she was honest.

"Can you please leave?" I ask.

"Could I stay here?" She asks at the same time.

"Ok." I answer. I get up and toss my tea in the sink. The chamomile starts to irritate my stomach and I feel like I am going to vomit. "I need to take a shower."

I leave her in the living room as I head back to the bathroom. I turn on the hot water and strip my clothes off as fast as I can without looking in the mirror. When steam starts to rise over the top of the curtain, I step into the tub. I jump back from the scalding water and turn it down before stepping back under and letting it wash over my upturned face as I rub my neck with my hands. A cold breeze runs over my back and I turn under the water towards the temperature change. When I open my eyes, Lisa is standing in the shower. I open my arms and she steps under the water with me. I hug my arms around her slim rib cage and gasp for breath slightly as water rushes over my face still. "You love me, too, right?" I ask quietly.

"Yes." She turns to kiss me and I turn my head away. She looks stunned at my rejection and I turn under the water again and reach for the shampoo. As I wash, I feel her arms encircle me from behind. I bite my lip, will myself not to kiss her. When I finish I turn off the water and step out of the shower. I hand her my extra towel and we dry off in silence. I pull on a t-shirt and swish some mouth wash over my teeth before heading into the bedroom to crawl into bed. Cuddy does the same and follows me into my room. She waits a minute before getting into bed as well. I don't understand her. She just finished telling me that she chooses her job over me and yet she curls herself around my body and breathes against my neck as we lie silently. I fall asleep wrapped in her.

Like clockwork, she is out of bed two hours after I fall asleep. Her dropping her shoe while trying to get it on alerts me that she is leaving. I roll over onto my side and watch her dress. She notices me and looks at me with an exposed expression but continues on. As she is about to leave the room I say, "Don't expect me to be there when you decide you want this." And then she leaves. I roll back over onto my side and hug my legs to my chest. I don't know how long I cry before I fall asleep.