A/N: Hi guys, how's the beginning of fall going? I'm looking for new inspiration for my writing so I've been branching out to reading some really good Zelda and Fire Emblem fics; have any of you guys read any really good fics lately? Will you let me know in your reviews what some of your favorite Nintendo fics are so I can go read them? Thanks everyone!

"Nope"

"But—"

"Nuh uh."

"Bowser…"

"Not gonna happen."

"Why not?" Peach whined, holding up a magazine and shaking it at her stubborn new husband. Nearby, two interior decorators, a Goomba and a Toad, cast nervous glances at one another, neither daring to utter a peep.

"Peach, there is no way I'm gonna sleep in a bed surrounded by a buncha bows and flowers and girly stuff. I'm Bowser, King of the Koopas, not…Oberob, King of the Fairies."

"It's Oberon; and it shouldn't matter where you sleep, as long as it's next to me, right?"

Bowser scratched his head for a moment, "What's wrong with my bedroom? It's got me all over it. It'll be like you're sleeping next to me, and next to me on the other side, and me on the curtains, and me on the floor…"

"That's exactly what's wrong with it!" Peach shouted. "This whole castle is all Bowser, no Peach. The corridors are gloomy, the parlors are drab, and everything is just…"

"Perfect for a showdown with a burly final boss!"

Peach slammed her fist down on the table, a bad habit she had picked up from her beloved husband, "I am NOT a final boss."

Bowser laughed, "You kinda look like one right now though. H-Hey, what are you doing with that plate of cheese," he cringed, preparing to be showered with dairy products.

"Unbelievable!" Peach turned on her heel and marched off with the cheese platter, slamming the door to her former guest room, the only room in the castle decorated to her specifications.

A storm raged outside as Bowser sat with his giant head perched on his claw, losing yet another game of chess to his genius son, Ludwig.

"Father…that is an extremely unwise move. I will give you the opportunity to retract it, if you desire."

"Hmph," Bowser grunted, looking away.

"King Dad! King Dad!" Junior busted into the room at full speed, skidding to a stop and bellowing at the top of his lungs, "King Daaaaaad!"

Bowser groaned his displeasure, "What did I say about INDOOR VOICES?!" Bowser roared back at his youngest son.

"Ow ow ow," screeched Junior, sticking a claw into his ear and rubbing vigorously. "Never heard what you said, 'cause now I'm deaf."

"Dear brother, I do not believe that's how deafness wor—"

"Ludo, didn't you hear me? I said I'm deaf, so I can't hear what you're saying either. I also maybe definitely did not hear what Mama Peach was saying in her room about King Dad. Because I'm dea—"

"We heard you, runt. Ludo, get this kid a cure for his deafness so he can tell me what Mama Peach was saying."

"Father…" Ludwig shook his head, "If my brother were truly deaf, he should still be able to-"

Ludwig sighed, stopping himself. "And what does the little prince require to cure his deafness?"

"Cookies!" cheered Junior.

Soon, Ludwig returned, muttering to himself that when he was the only Koopaling he would never have received such pandering treatment.

Junior forcefully dug into his plate of leftover biscotti, "Hooway," he cried, mouth full of cookies, "Ifs a mira-cull! I'm cured!"

"Yeah yeah," Bowser grunted, "Now get to the story."

"Uhh…" Junior rubbed his head, pulling on his ponytail to try to remember. He jumped up suddenly, "Oh yeah! King Dad, Mama Peach is really, really mad."

Bowser slumped, deflated, "Tell me something I don't know."

"Uh, she's so mad she was saying things like…King Dad's an insensitive jerk and she doesn't know why she married such a stubborn idiot with no taste."

"Wh-What did you say?!" Bowser roared, rising out of his seat to glower at his son.

"Waah! I didn't say it!" Junior howled, "It was Mama Peach! She's really mad and that's why I came to tell youuu!"

Bowser sighed and sat back down.

"Father, has something occurred between you and Mother?"

Bowser grumbled and avoided eye contact, looking not unlike a child who has been caught making doing something he's not supposed to. "Ludo…is the castle looking…drab and gloomy?"

"Perpetually, dear father. The spiked chandeliers and glowering faces of your noble visage, while intimidating, are perhaps a bit…démodé."

Bowser grunted, "Don't swear while your Mama Peach is around."

Ludwig rolled his eyes, "Apologies, Father. What I meant to say is that I have deduced your disagreement with Mother is over the castle décor. Doubtless, she would be more comfortable in a living space that is more aesthetically aligned with what she has grown accustomed to in the Mushroom Kingdom."

"But it's so…" Bowser fell silent.

"I understand completely, Father, but consider…what is pink but a pale shade of red? What is a bow but a complex knot? Surely there is a compromise to be made?"

The Koopa King grunted, sulking.

"Junior," commanded Ludwig, "Call Wendy O., I have an idea."

Bowser tentatively knocked on the door to the guest bedroom, the echo bouncing off the bare stone walls of his castle. Hmm, perhaps I should get some kind of tapestry…

Peach slowly opened the door, peeking out to see her guilty-looking husband in the doorway. She sighed and folded her arms across her chest with a sad expression.

"Peach…I, uh, mis…miscommunicated," he grunted the only marriage advice he could remember from Kamek's long lecture about achieving marital bliss.

"Oh? How so?"

"Uh, I don't know; but you're sad and I don't want to be, so I must have said something wrong."

Peach sighed and placed her hand on his firm, scaly arm, "Bowser…it's tough being away from my home like this. I really love being here with you and the kids but…"

Bowser looked into her sad, blue eyes and felt a look of worry flash across his face, "You…you want to go back? You can't! I mean, we're married now and…"

Peach chuckled, and pressed her cheek against his carapace. "Don't worry, I'm not moving back. I just think it might be nice to have a little vacation back home. I'd take you with me but…"

Bowser winced remembering his last visit as the official-unofficial king of the Mushroom Kingdom, "I don't think Toadsworth's puny little heart could take it."

Peach blushed, "Um, yeah. We might want to wait a while before you come back."

Bowser buried his face in Peach's hair, smiling until his eyes crinkled at the edges. "I love you, Peach."

Peach pressed her cheek closer to her king, "I love you to-ooh…?"

Peach rose as their tender moment was interrupted by a loud knock on the guest room door. "Mama Peach, King Dad, you better not be doin' anything weird, 'coz I'm comin' in!"

Junior burst though the doorway, "It's READY!"

Bowser growled, "What the hell kinda knock was that? What if we were doin' somethi—"

Peach flushed, "Uuuhhh, that's enough dear. What's finished, Junior?"

"Your new bedroom! Ludo and Wendy worked together and I helped!" Junior boasted, with his tiny chin and chest thrusted toward the ceiling.

Peach giggled and wiped a bit of paint off his little cheek, "Oh, you did, did you?"

"Should I be worried?" Bowser asked, a suspicious glint in his eye.

"No way, King Dad! Come see! Hurry guys, hurry!"

Junior grabbed Peach by the hand, and took off running. Peach was barely able to grasp Bowser's claw to slow everyone's speed a bit as they all took off running down the hallway.

"Da da da duuun!" Junior sang, and he burst through his third door of the evening. "Presenting King Dad and Mama Peach's new room!"

Peach and Bowser's eyes widened as they stared into the room, a cascade of red glitter falling on their heads upon entry.

"Ah, Father, Mother, you have arrived," Ludwig remarked casually, sitting at the white grand piano, smirking at them over the lit candelabrum.

"Hey Daddy, Mama Peach," said Wendy, silhouette visible from behind a backlit dressing screen, "Like, what do you think of your new room?"

Peach smiled through grit teeth, pupils the size of pinpricks. Red heart-shaped bed. Red glowing paper lanterns. Faux fur rug. A disco ball?!

"Um…"

"What the—" Bowser exclaimed, "This room looks kinda like a love hot—"

"Lovely place!" Interrupted Peach, "Thank you so much, Ludwing and Wendy. Thank you for all your, um, hard work."

"Hey!" Junior cried, "Don't forget about me! I did all the artwork! See?"

Junior pointed to a large framed painting directly behind where Bowser and Peach had entered the room. Though the painting was rough, clearly rushed with thick lines, splatters, and obviously made by a child, it clearly depicted Bowser and Peach in a…horizontal position.

"Junior?! What in the world is this picture?!"

It's Mama Peach and King Dad in a tickle fight!" Junior presented, proud and innocent. " I drew King Dad winning because he always wins, but don't worry, you're a for-mid-a-ble opponent too, Mama Peach!"

Out of the corner of his eyes, Bowser caught Ludwig and Wendy trying hard not to snicker. "Alright, that's it. Everybody out. Now!"

"But, King Dad!"

"Daddy!"

"Father!"

"OUT!" He bellowed.

"Thank you very much for your hard work everyone," Peach managed to squeak out before the door slammed on the Koopalings. The two older kids collapsed in quiet hysterics while the other one frowned and demanded to know what was so funny.

Inside, sitting on the heart-shaped sheets, Peach was the first to speak. "Bowser, I'm very sorry. I see now that I was wrong to demand you change your bedroom."

"No. This is my fault," grunted Bowser, struggling to take down Junior's unintentionally lewd mural off the wall. "I shoulda realized…how important your surroundings are." He exhaled, finally bringing the frame to a rest on the floor, where he spun it around so it faced the wall.

He sat on the bed next to Peach, panting a bit. "You're my wife, and I made a vow to put your happiness first. If that means sleeping in bows or Barbie's Dream House, whatever. I'm…I'm man enough for that."

Peach smiled, "You're so sweet, my handsome king."

Bowser fixed her with a goofy smile, "Hey, since it's too late to do any interior decorating tonight, we might as well work with what we've got. What would you say to a nice tickle fi—"

In reply, he received a shriek and a sequined heart-shaped pillow to his face.