Of Schemes and Drunk Politicians

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing.

Summary: Written for COL 09, Relena is tired of Heero's excuses as to why they can't be together and takes matters into her own hands.

Rated: M (sexual situations)

"I HATE him!" She cried out, her hands balled up into white fists of fury.

Out of the corner of her eye, her best friends of nearly four years took a step back. "Honey? Do you think maybe you could put down the knife?"

Their friend turned angry eyes on them, the kitchen knife held high in the air. "Hilde, I'm well aware of my surroundings when I'm ranting."

Hilde took a step just behind Dorothy. "You sure?"

Both blondes gave her annoyed looks – one for the insult and the other for suddenly becoming a human shield.

"What exactly is it that gives him the right to think I don't need him." Seething, Relena thrust the knife down and sliced the innocent vegetable on the counter. "I mean really? What am I? Two?"

Hilde twitched when her friend sliced at an inhumane speed. Damn, she'd heard a few of the pilots training her – for self defense of course – but not to be a fucking maniac!

Relena chopped up two carrots, then a few celery sticks before she noticed both girls hadn't moved from the doorway. "I'm not going to accidentally stab you. I'm pissed not irresponsible."

Hesitantly, the girls moved to the kitchen table, eyes never wavering from the weapon clad hand.

One thing was for certain, if Heero even thought about walking in here, he'd be dead for sure.

"What did he say, exactly?" Dorothy asked, careful to not say anything that would set the girl off. Wars she could handle. Hell, armies didn't even give her a sliver of fear. But best friends with sudden bursts of rage…not so much.

Oh if she ever got a hold of that damn pilot and his egotistical macho bullshit, she'd strangle him until he was six feet under – and then stomp him down two more feet.

Relena's sharp intake pulled her out of her thoughts and found the girl near tears. "I just don't understand. What is so wrong with me that he can't even stay long enough for me to wake up in the morning after a night of-"

"Spare the details, sweetie. We get the picture. He's an ass." Hilde intervened and Dorothy silently thanked her. While they were close, it wasn't necessary to know all there was to know of Relena Dorlain. "But I don't think you should cry your eyes out over him."

Relena made a pathetic effort at denying her emotional distress, but the large hiccup at the end pretty much killed the attempt.

Dorothy cocked an eyebrow at this. "What you need is a night out. A fun, stress-free, dance till you drop, drink till you're knocked out, girl's night out."

Hilde gave an encouraging nod. "I think that sounds like a good idea."

Misty eyed, Relena finally threw down the knife on the counter and gave a sharp nod. "You are absolutely right. Forget Heero and his dick headed advice. If he doesn't want me, I can find someone who does." She stormed out the kitchen, heading for her closet to find something nice to wear while her friends took a deep relieving breath.

"Remind me the next time to wear body armor when we answer a distress call," Hilde muttered just as Dorothy rolled her eyes.

…

"You did what?!" Duo exclaimed, hands flat on the desk as his eyes bugged out of their sockets. "Are you insane or just that stupid?"

Sitting before him, his friend and colleague for some time since the war and thereafter, Duo found the man's mindset, well to put it bluntly, crazy. For the most part he'd been silent, with his eyes shut like he'd been sleeping for the most of the yelling.

"How could you do that man? I thought you loved her!"

Heero's eyes finally popped open at that. "I do." He said tiredly. "But that isn't good enough to endanger her life over."

Scratching his head, Duo dropped back into his office chair exhausted. "Man. I swear. What is it with you and taking control over everything? Do you ever think about what she wants? I mean come on, she's twenty two. Not a child. And this whole self-sacrificing thing, it's getting old by the way."

Heero threw him a look of disapproval at that.

"What? You know I'm right." Duo rubbed at his temple. "But I guess you're just gonna have to learn the hard way."

An eyebrow rose at that. "How so?"

Amusement worked through him at the response. "Well, have you noticed Relena isn't some ordinary stuffed shirt politician? She's hot! If you won't take her, someone else will and do you know where you'll be? Sitting on the sidelines while he kisses her and holds and makes love-"

The pilot suddenly shot up from his seat as he stalked out the door. Smiling, Duo waited until he was sure the coast was clear before punching in a few numbers into the office ViaCom. After a few short rings, his lovely girlfriend's face graced the screen. "Hey babe, what's up?"

He gave a famous Maxwell smirk and leaned into the screen. "Nothing much just a bit of scheming. Interested?"

Hilde paused, screwing her face up in mock consideration. "Who is the target?"

God did he love this one. "Our good old oblivious love struck friends."

Eyes sparkling in delight, Hilde gave a smile. "Well then of course, I'm in."

"Good."

The brunette gave him a wink. "You should know that Dorothy and I are taking Rel out to a club tonight. Might possibly be our perfect moment to strike?" She let her words fall into a question though her eyes gave way to her mind already plotting.

Did he say how much he loved this woman? Well he did.

"Perfect. I'll be in touch with information about Black bird." Code for Heero. For some reason, Hilde and he talked a lot like for work purposes and eventually careened out to their daily life.

Giving a salute, Hilde blew a kiss. "Roger, I'll be sure to keep an eye on Mother Dove." Relena. "Later babe."

The screen dissolving to black, Duo punched in a few more numbers and found his good old war buddy. Picking up the receiver, Duo leaned back in his chair. "Hey Q-man. Listen, I need a favor. Would it be possible to imply a threat? Yeah I know it's not smart and he'll kill me for it. Wait how'd you know it was for Heero? Ah, yeah. I am predictable. But you gotta love my determination. Yeah. Mmmhmm. She'll be there. Hil and Dorothy will be with her as well."

Duo twisted a pen between his fingers. "Yep. Okay, thanks a lot man. And if I die, remember to bury me with deck of cards and a joke book for the afterlife." He heard a short laugh from the other end before a disconnecting sound. Sighing happily at his amazing work, Maxwell leaned back until the chair tipped too far back and he and the chair went flying. "SUNAVA-Oomph!"

…

8 pm, Friday Night.

Relena felt warmth vibrate through her skin. The taste of alcohol touched her tongue as she took a deep breath, moving through the crowd. Her friends sat in coroner booth.

"Finally!" Letting out a sigh, Relena dropped herself in the seat and brushed a hand through her now damp hair. Not only was the place crowded, but so many caused the place to feel more like a sauna. "It's hard to even step into the entrance let alone trying to get through to anything else."

Dorothy waved her hand, obviously not caring of the popularity of the club. "Don't worry about that. Here," She pushed a glass to her, filled with blue liquid "drink this."

Making a face, Relena eyed it carefully. "What is it?"

"Poison." Hilde laughed. "The good kind."

Relena sighed and drank the blue liquid. Though it had a fruity taste, the drink burned down her throat. "Mm, wow." She covered her mouth and coughed. "That was a lot stronger than I expected."

Laughing, the girls called out for more as the club thumped out, vibrating through the speakers.

9:30, Friday Night.

Heero stepped into the club, the black shirt he wore, already sticking to his skin. A group of girls giggled into his ear as he walked by them. One reached out to grab his ass. He side stepped, looking for his target.

Normally, he would have already staked the place out. Made sure to find a perfect spot to watch on but that didn't happen. Instead, the warning of a potential threat on the Minister didn't reach him until a half hour ago; thanks to some idiot he would find and fry later.

A couple was bumping and grinding on the dance floor, their arms swinging around. Heero moved beside them, trying to find the young blonde when someone rammed into him from the back. He went to teach the moron who would strike him from behind when all he found was a man on the floor, in a drunken stupor. It seemed so was everyone else in the club.

Heero heard a sharp gasp, followed by a giggle. "You knocked him over!" A woman fell into him, her fingers grasping his shoulder for balance as her other hand reached to touch the unconscious man. "You okay?" She hiccupped. "He's not getting up." Eyes bleary with haze, she looked up. "He's not getting up." She repeated.

That's when he finally could see her. "Relena?! What the-"

Hilde and Dorothy's face matched his own when they came up to claim their friend from touching complete strangers. Confusion. "What are you doing here?" Heero asked them.

Dorothy poked him in his side.

"Funny, we should ask you the same question. Seeing as this is a girl's night out, not a girl's plus one guy night out."

Relena made a mock jab at him like Dorothy had. "Yeah. What are you doing here?"

When she went to make another jab, her footing slipped a bit and her balance went south. She tipped forward, until Hilde reeled her back up with an arm around her waist. "Woooh, easy girl! You almost had a date with the floor."

Hugging her friend close, Relena let out a goofed up gasp that sounded more like she were entertaining a baby then fearing gravity. "Ooh. That would be bad, right?"

Both women rolled their eyes. "Yes. It would." Dorothy hooked her hands on her hips and returned her attention back to Heero. "So what exactly are you doing here?"

Before he could open his mouth, Relena answered with her own conclusion. "You came here to stop me from having any fun! Right? I know I'm right." She huffed and detangled herself from Hilde to push a hand on Heero. He didn't budge, but that didn't stop her.

"Relena, I only came here because someone said you were in danger."

The blonde gave him a puzzled look, turned to the dance floor and returned her attention to him. "Really? What is so dangerous about a dance floor? You afraid someone might make me dance until my feet are sore? Ooh!" Her eyes brightened as an idea popped into her head. "I know! Maybe a man would actually ask me to dance and he would fall for me."

A tick worked over his eye.

Dorothy and Hilde both caught sight. Oh, this wasn't going to be looking good.

"Um, Relena sweetie. I think it's time we call it a night." Hilde tried to coax the girl. Relena eyed her friend like she'd grown two heads.

"Are you nuts?" Relena waved her hands about the club. "We've only been here for a little while."

"How many drinks have you had?" Heero's cool hands touched her skin. "And what the hell was it?"

Dorothy's brow puckered as she touched the Minister's forehead, "Some weird drink that was on the house. Me and Hil had some as well. Geez, Relena. Your head's on fire."

Decision made, Heero excused himself for a few minutes. "Keep an eye on her." He ordered to the girls before heading in the back of the club to 'speak' with the manager.

About fifteen minutes later, Heero came back to find Relena now bouncing around up on a stage. Her dress barely made it to her knees as it swirled about her body when she began twirling like a top. "What happened to watching her?"

Hilde pinned him with a glare. "Oh yeah. You try controlling a suddenly rebellious drunk Politian and see how far you get with keeping her still."

"Besides," Dorothy pointed to the blonde who was busy making 'hoos' and 'haws' to the crowd which cheered her on, "she's not in any danger."

Just then a guy about twenty five hollered for her to strip. Heero nearly decked him out until he saw Relena give a wave of her hand like it was nothing and started for the zipper of her dress. "GET HER DOWN!" He shouted and all three went to bring the Minister down. She fought for a moment until finally giving up and instead snuggled against Heero, her arms wrapped tightly around his neck.

"I think it's time to go home now." He muttered. Relena laughed.

"Only if I get to sleep in my pretttty dress."

Carefully, he made his way out the door with the semi-conscious politician and her entourage of friends to an expensive looking parked car. He buckled her in the passenger seat of the black Jag and closed the door to find the girls eyeballing him.

"What?"

Hilde crossed her arms. "You better take care of her."

He frowned. "You're not coming?"

Both women shook their head. "No. I think you and her need to have some time alone. Let you deal with the aftermath of that little speech you gave her."

He mentally groaned. "She told?"

Dorothy snorted, flipped her hair over her shoulder and started heading back into the club, Hilde right behind her. "Have a good night Heero. And don't do anything I would do."

Heero shook his head as the two disappeared back into the mass of bodies and jumped into his car. The last thing he needed was this.

…

"What," Heero felt every fiber of anger ripple through his body that wished to be unleashed on the idiot's head, "do you mean no one is here?"

Duo laughed. "Dude, Rel and the girls had planned on sleeping over at Hilde's and my place. That would give everybody the night off at the Dorlian residence."

"Fine." He punched the disconnect key and shoved his phone back into his pants pocket before lifting Relena higher as she started to slide from his arms. "Looks like it's just you and me." He mumbled to her as he pushed open her front door.

A few muffled giggles erupted from behind him as Relena grabbed his butt for leverage. She tried to mock salute him but found she couldn't leave her hands from their position without being airborne again . "Yes Sir, Sergeant Sir." Yeah, tonight just wasn't going to be looking good.

10:00, Friday Night.

"Relena, you have to take the dress off."

Glaring with daggers in her eyes, she chucked her other heel at him, narrowly missing his head. Damn it! Why was he so fast!

"No! You promised I could sleep in it!"

What was she two? Heero grounded his teeth as he planned that damn manager's death slowly. Who spiked an already alcoholic drink? Seriously? Relena not being all that tolerable with alcohol tanked on drink two. She'd had six. "Relena, you can't." This was getting ridiculous. "Come down from there, please. You're going to end up getting hurt."

Instead of heeding the warning, she stepped higher until she ended up crouched on her tall high boy dresser. "I don't think so, Buddy. You just wanna see me nekkid!" She threw a brush. It only grazed his shoulder. He didn't even flinch. The fucker!

"I do not!" He looked offended. She suddenly felt like crying.

"What, you don't want to see me naked?" She half said, half whined. Her eyes were already near tears when Heero realized what she thought he'd said.

"No. Of course I do. I mean, I've already seen you naked it's just that - I don't want to see you naked unless you want me to. Damn it! Relena would you just come down from there?"

At the stress filled look on his face, she finally conceded and started to come down when her foot caught on the long black dress she'd worn and set her tumbling forward.

It wasn't until about a half second later did she realize that instead of kissing the floor, she landed against something softer, warm. And breathing hard.

"Oh no!" She backed up only to find a smashed Heero on her bedroom floor. "Are you okay?"

He let go a slow breath before replying with a quiet 'yes'. Sure that he was alright, Relena loomed over him, the V-cut of her dress becoming dangerously low as her breasts started to show. "You look like a bug on my floor." She laughed, still drunk as ever and pressed a kiss on his forehead. "There, feel better?"

Instead of sitting up straight, it seemed Heero was breathing all the harder. That threw her into a panic. Even though she hated his guts right now, she didn't want him to die!

"Heero? Are you there?" She worried her bottom lip, fingers probing his sides to see if he was hurt elsewhere. When her hands went lower, past his belt, she found her hands immobile.

Heero sat up, keeping his hands locked about her wrists as he pulled the both of them up. "Enough." He vented and dragged them over to the dresser. Quickly, he selected her pajamas and handed them to her. "Change. Now."

Relena knocked them from his hands and raised her chin defiantly. "I'm not a child, Heero."

He fixed her with a death glare that had sent many a men running in fear. She stuck her tongue out.

"Relena…" He grounded out. Boy, he really liked doing that.

Mock yawning, Relena looked around, not a care in the world.

"Get changed or else…"

Oh that was the last straw. She set her eyes on him, jaw set firm though it was clear she could hardly stand straight without wobbling.

"Or else what? You're going to spank me?" Relena let out a laugh, highly amused by this - until she caught sight of something in those dark blue eyes that had her burning up for other reasons beside the drink rushing through her veins. Immediately a blush crept through her cheeks. "I told you. I am not a child. You can't order me around."

They locked eyes, neither willing to let the other win. Relena's wavered slightly, attention drawn to his mouth. Heero watched on in awe as her lips parted, breath hitched. Normally, she wouldn't so much as twitch under his gaze, but the liquor seemed to intrigue her libido with a hidden itinerary.

For some reason, his groin reacted on its own accord to the woman before him. Damn it, when it came to her, she killed all sense. Sensuality, lust, everything he'd always kept in check screamed to be let out like a tidal wave. The goddess before him, in all her splendor, seemed to be the key.

"Relena…"

She kissed him then. Her mouth all but sucking the air from his lungs; and he didn't give a damn. Didn't want to, it felt too good to feel her lips against his after the long absence of it. But she was drunk. Did she even realize what she was doing? The thought startled him enough to try and break free. Fisting a handful of hair, Heero pushed against her. She fought back, her body trying to dominate. Smirking at that, he felt her hands clamor to the nape of his neck. One thing was for certain, whether sober or not, she remained stubborn as all hell. When she wanted something; she got it.

Finally, when they broke for air, the disarrayed look on Relena's face made him break out into a smile.

"I didn't want to kiss you." She stated, but her features looked more confused than offended.

"No?" He teased. That earned him a haughty look.

"You tricked me." She finally said, her head bobbing in agreement. "That's what happened."

Oh right. "You kissed me. Not the other way around."

Relena gave her best imitation of a glare to him. "I did no such thing."

Heero cocked an eyebrow. Her eyes darted down. They both knew who started that kiss. "Do you want me to leave?"

Looking around, she fiddled with her hair as her eyes remained unfocused, as if lost to what to do.

Taking that as a 'yes', he started to leave when a hand grabbed his arm, stopping him.

He turned to find her again glaring at him. "I didn't say yes."

"You didn't say no either."

Relena looked at him then, her eyes burning for something, anything to give reason for his departure. In truth, he shouldn't have been here. Telling her that they couldn't be together, that she didn't need him…and low and behold she was holding on to him like a lifeline. Much like he felt she was to him.

No one truly knew just how much Relena broke through all the barriers he'd built up as a child. Learning through harsh situations and even tougher hardships from being a war orphan, Heero was secluded to live a life alone. Society was its own war, one he actually feared to step in.

Relena though wouldn't give up. She kept encouraging, comforting, and even bullied him until finally the walls came down until they were nothing more than ashes.

"Don't leave." She whispered. Two seconds passed and finally the hand unclaimed his arm and she stepped back. He followed her actions just in time to see the black dress he'd been asking her to change out of slipping down to the floor.

He took in a large gulp of air. The giddy look had returned on her face and before he could really understand what was happening, she had her arms wrapped around him as her lips claimed his.

This though, he didn't fight. Couldn't. This one petite woman could undo him without breaking a sweat, where others relentlessly tried to break him with more torture then he cared to remember. So how could her touch unravel him? Was he weak against her? Against his hormones? No. He knew it had more to do with the actual woman – not the caress of one that gave way to his solid stature.

"What are you doing?" He mumbled against her mouth. She laughed. Did he really have to ask?

"What does it look like? I'm seducing you."

Relena fumbled for his clothes, hands already ripping apart his shirt. When skin finally kissed air, Relena ran her hands down his chest before stiffening. He found her eyes wide, almost fearful.

"What's wrong?"

She shook her head. "I can't do this."

"It's alright." He cooed, touching her cheek.

"No." Relena now looked aghast. "I can't seduce you like this. I'm taking advantage of you. "

Now that had him interested. "How exactly are you taking advantage of me?"

She waved her hand at him. "You're drunk. It'd be like raping you."

"I'm not drunk, you are."

Relena thought this over, her mind wrapping around the events of the night before giving him a beautiful smile. "Oh. I am. Never mind then." Her mouth was on him faster than he could blink.

Heero pushed on her shoulders, gently detaching her from him. "Am I taking advantage of you?"

At this, Relena let out an amused snort. "Heero, you're about as dangerous as 'Ducky in Pretty in Pink'."

Heero's brow puckered, hands seizing her waist. She gasped out in laughter as he tossed her on to the bed.

"Ducky my ass." And kissed her so thoroughly, steam seemed to roll off her skin as her toes curled in the blankets.

"Not bad." Then she frowned. "How did you know who I was referring to by the way?" She watched the pilot's face molt with a blush that had her shocked. "Oh my god, I don't know what's scarier, Heero Yuy, emotionless perfect solider blushing or that you watch chick-flicks."

Heero, not planning on answering, kissed her until they were both once again breathless.

"You're not going to answer me are you?" Relena questioned, her mouth pulling into a goofy grin.

He kissed her again. The grin disappeared.

She moaned, their skin brushing against each other. "Can you please stop teasing me?" She panted. "I'm not sure how much I can take of this."

Heero smiled and reached a hand down between her thighs. "What do you want?"

Feeling his hands coasting down between her legs, she shot him a lustful yet pleading glower. "Touch me."

"Where?"

She actually whimpered. "You know where, Heero. Don't toy with me." She thrust a hand out and seized his to guide him exactly where she wanted him. "Here. This is where I want you."

Wet and ready, he could feel heat radiating through her thin frail black panties. With ease, he pulled at the edge of them and like feathers; the fabric came apart in his hands. He felt more then heard the sudden gasp from Relena. But he had more important matters to handle then worry over a simple piece of fabric that she would soon forget about.

Placing a finger at her entrance, he watched as her face became strained with torture and need. The finger slid in, toying just at her clit and her mouth fell open in a silent cry.

Even drunk, she remained quiet, afraid for anyone else to hear.

"No one is here, Relena. It's just us." He plucked at her folds, making sure that it hit her clit. She wanted to cry out; bit her lip instead. "Scream for me." He murmured a second before his mouth was on her. This time she didn't have the control or will to smother the cry as her body thrashed against his mouth. He licked between the seams of her lips, then divulged inside her treasure of sweet nectar. Immediately, he felt himself groan at the familiar taste and he wanted more. He stroked her with a finger on the outside while his tongue worked her on the in. Relena's eyes were squeezing shut when she felt the first spasms of her orgasm. 'Dear God, she panted, why did I ever want to kill him?'

"Heero," She whispered loudly in warning. He knew what she was trying to tell him. Already he could taste her delectable flavor as her thighs began to squeeze shut. Her head lulled back as her body released. Fingers tangled in his dark locks, Relena held him there as her body shuddered in pure pleasure.

The man truly did have a way with his mouth.

When her lazed, Heero brought his head up to find her eyes slightly closed and her mouth parted while she gave pitiful gasps for breath. His smirk caught her eye. Oh no. She may be a little drunk, may have been sated a little – but he would not wear that smug look on his face without at least being in her predicament.

Carefully, she pulled herself up from the bed. Heero watched with curiosity as she pulled him to sit on the edge of the bed. When he did, she stooped down, bringing his pants and boxers along with him. They sat at the ground which she used as protection for her knees while she pulled his already straining cock into her two warm hands. He jumped at immediate contact and Relena reveled in it. Intimacy was always still new territory for Heero. Even though they'd been together for at least a handful of times, foreplay never quite been like this. Too shy and vulnerable, they never explored another quite like this.

Bold with booze and hormones rushing through her veins, Relena leant down and slid him into her warm inviting mouth like heated silk. Heero's hands, not wanting to harm Relena, dug into the bed's sheets as his eyes tried to stay focused. But it was hard. Seeing her blonde hair fan out around him like a curtain as her tiny mouth took him in with ease…it was like she knew exactly what to do…

His eyes widened when she flicked her nails down the base of his dick, causing a weird sensation to flutter up his shaft and down his back.

"How" He let out a breath, trying hard not to lose it. Damn it! Never had he lost this much control. Bullets whizzing through the air, nearly making holes all through his body, sure that he could handle. Knives flying and nearly slicing his throat – not a big deal. But this…

Relena pulled back, her mouth glistening as ocean blue eyes danced with fiery amusement. She was enjoying this just a little too much. Before he could ask how she knew this, her mouth sank back down on him, taking him completely. He nearly died right there.

At that moment, all thoughts, questions, worried – flew out the window as his body seized and he felt himself letting go. Relena purred as her fingers caressed him down while he released.

When she felt him finish, she pulled back and smiled. "Not bad." She licked her lips and they tugged into an infuriating self-satisfied smile that had him growling as he pulled her up into him and flipped them onto the bed, her back against the mattress.

She let out a squeak but it was silenced within seconds as he claimed her mouth. The mixture of both their tastes meddled into a completely different delight as they dueled for dominance. He fought her until they were both breathless and had to come up for air. But Relena wouldn't give in. She flipped over, onto his waist as each leg straddled to one side. Heero's eyes drew in when Relena maneuvered herself down his body, her now very slick center sitting just at the tip of his cock.

"I think it's time you realize that you have no control," She purred and then impaled herself onto him. They both hissed neither moving for a brief moment as everything became vivid. "Enough games, Heero." Relena's eyes found his and what he saw startled him. At the corner of each eye, crisp tears sprang forth. She rocked against him and his body instinctively followed.

With each thrust, every muscle throbbing, they drew closer. Not long, they were holding each other closely, eyes never wavering from each other. "I'm sorry." Heero whispered. The painful exquisite feel of her walls surrounding him, stroking was becoming unbearable. Relena wasn't doing much better. Her now redden cheeks were wet from shed tears as her eyes glazed over.

Touching her face, he cupped it into his palm, wiping away the debris of salt teardrops there. No words needed to be said. He held her waist just as they finally reached that plateau of carnal need. They held one another until they released a long tired breath. Relena collapsed into warm, waiting arms and pillowed her head against Heero's shoulder.

After a long while, Relena closed her eyes. "Do you mean it?"

"Yes."

She licked her suddenly dry lips. "We can be together. You won't try pulling away again?"

Heero brushed back a loose strand of hair from his face and kissed her lips, saturating them once more. "No. How can I? It's obvious I'm completely lost without you. And I can't really see myself without you."

She blinked, completely stunned. "Did you just-" Paused, worried her bottom lip.

"Stop that." He gave a tired growl.

Eyes wide with puzzle, "What?"

"Chewing your lip like that. You know it drives me crazy."

Relena frowned. "Crazy like you want to jump me and make mad wild passionate love with me or crazy like if I don't stop you're going to sucker punch me like Wufei does to Duo all the time?"

Dark blue eyes narrowed. "Are you still drunk?"

She pinched her fingers together and moved it a hair apart. "Slightly. But you didn't answer me."

"What do you think?"

She took in a long, drawling moment then glanced at him, looked away, and back to him.

Relena watched as a tick worked just over his eye and it gave her less time to jump from the bed and take off, Heero tailing her.

"I guess that means you do want to take advantage of me, eh?" Relena laughed, ducking around her bedroom door, a stark naked pilot right behind.

10:00, Saturday Morning.

Duo sat at his desk, the phone clutched to his ear as he listened to the news. His mouth, still hanging open, he took in the sight of a black eyed, bloody nose manager from the club Hilde and the girls had went to last night.

"He did what?"

The camera came back from the newspaper headlines that would be going out tomorrow morning and found Hilde looking somewhat guilty. "Beat him to a pulp."

"What happened to watching them?" Duo asked, completely at a loss.

"Well apparently, no one can spike Ms. Relena's drinks and get away with it."

Rubbing a finger against his now throbbing temple, Duo cracked a wincing smile. "So I guess that means I'll be having a chat with Heero soon eh?"

Hilde winced. "Well…at least you can say it was only partially your idea…"

Duo gave a deadpanned look. "Maybe we should plead insanity and Dorothy can just say it was in her nature."