Takono: And now, ladies and gentlemen!! May I present, the one! The only--

Usopp: (whisper) Hey Takono, do you mind not being in this fanfic?

Takono: O_O (GASP) (dramatic pause) But-but-but-but--

Usopp: Well you DO usually screw some up... I'd really rather do this myself... I mean can't there be ONE asking column without OC's popping in on the authors side?

Takono: i guess... fine. (walking off)

Usopp: (jumps through curtains) TA-DA!!! (fanfare)

(crickets chirp)

Takono? What happened to all the letters?

Takono: Oh, you're talking to me? I thought I wasn't welcome here.

Usopp: Can you at least tell me where all the questions went?

Takono: They never came. This chapter's only an introduction.

Sanji: Oi, Usopp! Make sure to give all the girls my best--

Usopp and Takono: NOT NOW!!!

Takono: (walking off)

Usopp: H-Hey! Where are you going?!

Takono: To do homework. I've got an essay, some social studies homework too...

Usopp: You mean you're just gonna leave me here??!?!

Takono: Teachers orders.

Usopp: (sigh) Fine. (spins to the audience) Well, I guess it's just me then! Ask anything you want! I don't care who it is, I'll take care of it! My... ahem... FANS... can range from little schoolgirls to assassins straight... out... of... (awkward silence) (turns pale) YOU KNOW WHAT?!?! KIDS AND TEENS ONLY!!! NO WAY I'M GONNA DIE!