Author's note: Hey, guys! I've written some Twilight fanfiction before, but this is the first one I've published. I'm a pretty experienced fanficcer, though! So anyway, I hope you guys like. Jasper/Bella is definately the most fun ship to write for, in my opinion. Also I am a Belasper shipper all the way. Belasper FTW! :D (Y)

Enjoy! xxx

Edward had been quiet with me ever since Phoenix. I could see the pain in his eyes whenever he looked at me, like there was some internal battle raging, causing him physical pain. Every time I asked him what was wrong he'd evade me in some way. He kept to himself more, no longer driving me to school, and often not even sitting with me at lunch. In the last week we hadn't spoken at all. It was like we were never even friends.

Now I was sitting alone in my room, looking at the rain rolling down my window. Suddenly the drops seemed to be distilling a yellow light. I looked down and saw a lemon-coloured Porsche sitting in the drive, making my beat-up old truck look like scrap metal. I could just make out the shapes of two people in the car. Just as I squinted to try and make them out, I heard the doorbell ring. I looked again.

The car was empty.

The Porsche was vaguely familiar to me: I remembered seeing it in the Cullen's garage. However, even as the flicker of hope ignited within me I knew it wouldn't be Edward. I stood up and walked towards my bedroom door, pausing to glance in the mirror as I passed it. My brown hair tumbled around my shoulders, untidy but clean. My nondescript green long-sleeve t-shirt was open quite low at the front, my black vest peeking out from between the buttons. I considered my face, bare except for the brown mascara I now wore on school days, thanks to Alice's encouragement. My lips looked pale, giving my face a wan, tired look. I bit them gently, encouraging a light flush. Better than nothing.

I hurried to the door, hoping whoever was there hadn't heard me fall at the foot of the stairs. Of course I knew they had. I opened the door and took in the sight of Alice and Jasper. I felt the tiny glimmer of hope I had still been holding in my chest die. Jasper's face was familiarly unreadable, but looking at Alice I noticed her customary smile for me was somewhat forced. I looked down and saw she was holding something white - an envelope. My greeting died on my lips as I saw the writing on it. His writing.

It was a letter for me from Edward. This could not be good.

"Hi, Bella," Alice's usually cheery voice held an undercurrent of anxiety. "mind if we come in?"

Wordlessly I stood back letting them enter. Jasper's eyes were fixed on mine as he passed me, following Alice. I knew he could sense my dread, and his expression did nothing to soothe me.

I followed them into the living room and gestured mutely at the surrounding chairs. Alice sat in a cosy chair, Jasper stood beside her, his hand on her shoulder, and I sat facing them on the couch.

"Bella," Alice began, "it's about-"

"Edward." My voice was dull, heavy. Alice looked at me, concern written across her delicate features. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jasper's gaze flicker to my lap. Looking down I realised my fingernails were digging into my thighs. I couldn't even feel it. "Oh God, he's done something stupid, hasn't he." It was a statement. I could read the truth from their expressions, their tense body language.

"Well, stupid is a matter of opinion," Alice said quietly.

"What's your opinion?" I asked, sharply, trying not to glare at her.

"I…" She trailed off and I saw Jasper squeeze her shoulder.

I closed my eyes and swallowed. Biting my lip I inhaled deeply through my nose, trying to prepare myself. "What has he done?"

"He's gone."

I didn't bother asking some stupid question, like "where" or "why". I knew why, and where didn't matter. He wasn't here.

Alice handed me his letter and it took all my strength to open the envelope with my trembling fingers. His words filtered through my mind, but the meaning was clear. He didn't want to put me in danger any more, he couldn't bare the thought of me being hurt because of him, or worse, by him. He knew that because of his self-control issues, he could never give me everything I needed or deserved. The words blurred together and the letter fell to the carpet, my hands returning to their position, fingers imbedded in my thighs.

I don't know how long I sat like that. My eyes were closed, so I almost jumped when I felt a cold hand close over my own. I relaxed my fingers out of my death grip on my legs and responded to the cool touch. I felt the hand take my limp one firmly and a thumb ghosted over the skin on the back of my hand, raising the hairs there. Simultaneously I felt an arm wrap around my shoulders and pull me lightly into a marmoreal, muscular body.

I opened my eyes and looked at Jasper. Even as his eyes locked with mine I felt a wave of calm wash over me, and only then did I notice there were tears pouring down my face. I tried to smile at him, to let him know I appreciated his comfort, but it was as though my muscles had forgotten what smiling was. Even with Jasper's induced calm, the tears kept coming.

Time always passed strangely when I was with vampires. At some point I thought I heard a whisper, very low and fast, and then a car engine, and I became aware that Alice was no longer with us. Perhaps it was his strange power, but I didn't feel at all uncomfortable alone in Jasper's presence. I remembered how he'd had to be so careful when we first met to keep away from me, and I heard Edward's voice in my head.

Desensitised.

At the thought of him I drew a breath, somewhere between a gasp and a sob. The sound of my ragged breathing tore through the silence and I felt Jasper flinch. Some part of me remembered how his power seemed to work more the closer I was to him, and with no real thought for anything other than relief from this unbearable pain, I reached out my free hand and snaked my arm around his neck, pulling us into a sitting embrace.

I rested my head against him and closed my eyes, listening to the sound of him inhale and exhale with inhuman regularity. His smell was different to Edward's, fresher, greener, and yet somehow incredibly sultry, like a beautiful flower floating on a crystal pool, or a plum tree covered in ripe fruit, standing a dewy meadow. It spoke of safe places inside danger, or possibly the exact opposite. He stroked my hair back from my face and I heard his breathing hitch momentarily as he inadvertently exposed my neck.

And suddenly an idea struck me.

"Jasper," I said, straightening to look at him. I was a little surprised to see that he, like me, had had his eyes closed. He opened them and looked at me and I noted their colour was dark, verging on chocolate.

"What is it?" he asked, looking concerned. His eyes lightened as I pulled back from him and I marvelled at their opalescent caramel brilliance. "Bella?" His voice snapped me back to my train of thought.

"I need your help. You have to do something for me, please say you'll help." He looked uncomfortable to be put on the spot. "Please, Jasper," I begged him. His expression softened at my tone.

"What do you need?"

"I need…" I trailed off, wondering if this was right. But I couldn't see any other way to be with Edward and that was all I needed. "I need you to bite me."

A/N: Dun dun DUUUUUN! :D OK, so hope you guys like this. I don't really quite know where it's going yet, so I'm going to need some nice reviews to boost my muse! That rhymes. I'm happy now. R&R PLEASE!!!!!!! :) xxx