Title: No redemption, no salvation
Rating: M+15 for themes
Warnings: Spoilers for season three and slight for the characters and plot of season 4
Characters: Dean, Castiel, Uriel

Summary: There would be no salvation for Dean Winchester, not this time.

Perdition is a permanent place of hell where there is no redemption and no salvation.
- We believe, Rulon T. Burton

Hell was a prison; a cage made out of blood and bone, fear and sin where every eternity the demons found new ways of testing the strength of his flesh. There was no redemption here, no salvation. And yet, as they sliced, tore and carved into him he screamed for a saviour.

The first thing Dean felt as he entered the gates of hell was heat. The floor beneath his feet hissed and sizzled, cooking his soles. He hopped from foot to foot as his skin began to blister and his hair to smoke. Looking back now, he laughed that he had called that pain; what he had to learn.

When the demons grabbed at him, digging into his flesh with fingers and tools he gritted his teeth and swore at them. The snarls of explicit words soon turned to howls of pain, wrath to bargaining.

They played on his every fear, every skeleton in the cupboard. They ripped him apart by the seams, savouring the sight of defeat in once defiant eyes before sewing him back up and starting all over again.

Dean had once favoured the dark, it was a safe cocoon where he could hide from the world and himself. In hell the sparse moments he had by himself in the shadows were the ones he dreaded. Listening to others scream and gurgle on their own blood and not knowing what was coming next. He'd rather feel pain than nothing at all.

There was no way of telling time in hell. Days, months, years he laid on the rack having his skin tore from his body all in the stretch of a few minutes. Everything merged into each other until there was nothing but pain and heat. The day the angels walked the fields of the forgotten souls however was one he would not forget. He could have been there a century or maybe even only a few hours; he had no way of knowing, nor did he care. His chance at getting out was here.

The two figures walked with determination, one tall and commanding and the other graceful and sure. Hands ripped and pulled at their robes, begging, pleading but they took no notice; nobody came here without a reason.

Dean watched, shaking as they stared at the multitude, searching for something. He froze as they moved closer to him and before he knew it they were standing in front of him.

"Please", he choked out through split lips, "Please help".

The graceful one looked down at him and Dean found himself staring into the face of an angel. Light poured from the figures onto him and for a moment, one split second Dean felt peace. He tried to match the gaze as the angel stared at the shattered remains of his soul. The light tugged at his last moments of life.

His deal, his death. The pain as his chest was ripped to shreds while Lilith laughed. And Sam- oh, Sammy.

Dean reached for the memory but it fell from his grasp as the angel looked away.

Nobody came here without a reason and Dean knew he was not theirs.

A sob caught in his throat as he reached for the only thing that could save him.

He felt a hand on his own, but it was a controlling grip, not a comforting one. The hand pried his blood crusted fingers away before letting go.

"I'm sorry', the angel said, his voice empty and cold, "It is not you we are searching for".

Dean sought the man's face, searching hungrily for some sort of mercy. Blue eyes stared vaguely back at him. They reminded him of the sky, both in colour and their seemingly endless expanse. He wondered what the sky looked like now, trying to recall the sensation of wind on his face, the warmth of the sun on his back as he drove his car, Sammy by his side.

Then the blue eyes were gone and Dean was left with nothing but fading memories as the darkness began to close in on him. He opened his mouth to scream but it was lost in the multitude of other dammed souls.

There would be no salvation for Dean Winchester, not this time.