Temporary Fix

It was like a thick gray ocean, minus the water. Kyle clenched his hands at his sides, determined. He stood facing Stan and Damien in what he called a 'Nowhere Place.'

Kyle felt ad for Stan. It didn't seem fair that he had to lose Kenny as soon as he forgave him. Now wasn't the time to dwell upon such things, though. They were going to get Kenny back, not lose him.

At the same time, though, there was a small- but not as small as Kyle would have hoped- told him to just turn around. Go home. If Kenny comes back, nullifies his deal, then Kyle would be a goner. Kenny traded his own life for Kyle's. If Kenny got his back… But Kyle didn't pay much attention to that voice. Kenny died for him. The least he could do was return the favor. He took a deep breath. He'd faced death a thousand times, not knowing he was going to inevitably live through his loved one's sacrifice. One more time. Just one more.

"The spirit should be the easiest to find, "Damien explained, "it should look exactly like him. The spirit is the connection to the body, as I said. The soul, though, is the hard part. It won't look like anything. Just… more gray. But you should be able to sense it, or hear it thinking."

Kyle nodded mutely, and Stan just continued to stare at him, intent.

"Got it? All right. Just say my name if you find either. I'll here you. Now walk." Damien turned then, and left. Stan nodded at him, and turned as well. After a short pause, Kyle followed suit, disappearing into the gray.

Karen sobbed, in complete hysterics. Kevin gritted his teeth and remained silent, clenching his fists in his lap against the chair beneath his legs.

Dammit! You goddamn idiot… damn you… damn you to hell!

It was a small service. No one ever missed Kenny. Even though Kenny had been acting really damn weird, and he hadn't come back yet and it had been two damn days. What if he… what if he didn't? No one would notice. No one would care.

Kevin swore out loud, then got up and left while Father Maxi was still preaching. A tug on his hand told him Karen had followed. Maybe if some of his brother's so-called 'friends' had bothered to show up, it wouldn't have hit him so hard. But no one from school had come. Cartman had said he would, but where was he now? Home sleeping, probably. Kyle? Selfish bastard probably thought he was the only one left in the world who missed Kenny.

Kevin shook his little sister's hand off, and turned out of the graveyard, back to his car. He couldn't sit there anymore, and watch people twist their fingers in their hair and sigh like his brother's death was meaningless. Maybe it was common- but not meaningless.

He wrenched the door open jerkily, frustrated. Just because he was a damn ass to his brother all the time didn't mean he couldn't care when he died! He was a goddamn older brother, it was his job!

Kevin sighed, feeling all the anger go out of him. Something had been wrong with Kenny for too long now. His mind was always elsewhere, he said things that made no sense, he seemed dark, depressed- there was a general wrongness to him all the time now. Kenny thought his brother didn't notice the gun he kept stuffed in his back pocket, under the thick folds of his hoodie. He thought his brother didn't notice just how often he used it on himself rather than get hit by a train, or fall off a cliff. Karen was outside the car, beating her tiny fists against the window at him. Dammit, Kenny… Who the fuck do you expect to take care of this damn kid if you ditch us?

All the anger, and all the bad feelings, and all the thoughts directed at his little brother didn't matter. Kenny had died two days ago and not yet come back.

Kevin let his forehead rest against the steering wheel.

Kyle took determined steps, undettered by what would have surely had any ordinary person frightened and reluctant. Kyle, though, had purpose, and reason. It was calming himself with these very thoughts, when the mist parted, and a thing that looked very much like Kenny drifted by. Kyle's heart leapt, and he stumbled forward that last step, grabbing him by the wrist.

"Kenny? Kenny!" Kenny, though was unresponsive. Kyle sighed. It was only his spirit, "Oh, Kenny…"

Stan was far more tentative than his friend. Not only was the general location frightening enough with it's blankness, but the idea of coming up to a conscious Kenny and apologizing for being such a jackass was disconcerting as well.

Hello?

Stan paused, looked around. "Um… hello?"

Oh. You are back, then.

Stan recognized he voice, and the guilt hit him suddenly at the greeting.

"I, um…" He stuttered, forgetting his carefully practiced lines.

What do you want with me?

"I- I'm sorry! That's- what I wanted to say. I'm sorry."

Eh? What for?

Stan paused, "It's Stan. I'm apologizing for being an ass."

Oh.

"Oh?"

So you're Stan, now. I had hoped you'd be Kyle.

Stan's heart sunk, and he didn't answer.

Did you want something?

"I want you to come back with me! Come home!"

…I don't want to.

"Why not?"

It's nicer here. It's quiet. Peaceful. No one is disturbing me. I don't feel hated here.

"Hated? By who?"
Well, you, of course.

"Me…?"
I'm done with being glared at every time I come near you. I'm finished with knowing that every time I kiss my boyfriend, you see it as a low life molesting your best friend. I smile, and you hate me. I speak, and you hate me. I exist, and you hate me for it.

"…I don't hate you…"

Oh, but you do. You so do. I had thought I had explained this… you simply are not San-like enough. You hate me, Stan, this is simply truth.

"I- what?"

Sigh… Of course, I guess you are close enough for comfort's sake. You're very convincing, if it makes you feel any better. Either way, it is not only Stan that has driven me to liking this place.

I suppose it was just everything, together. My best friend, hating me every second of every day. The stress and pain I've put on Kyle just by being who I am, death and all. The constant barrage of insults from Cartman, ever so slowly whittling away at my self confidence. The lack of attention from my family, the steady decline in my grades, the visits to the hospital, the trading away of myself… all in all, all of what made up 'me' made me hate 'me.' It's surprising how easy it is to look at oneself after one has died.

There was a silence, calm from the voice of Kenny, faltering, and honestly scared from Stan.

"Oh, Kenny…" Stan said, finally.

There was a sharp intake of breath.

Kenny. Kenny! That's my name!

"Of course it is! Who the hell else could worry me so much?!"
Then you are Stan! The real one!

"Who the hell else would I be? Jesus Christ, dude, I'm sorry!"

I wanna go home. I just wanna go home.

"I thought you liked it here-"

I forgot who 'I' was…

"Don't worry, dude, we're here to bring you back."

We? Who's we?

"Me and Damien and Kyle, duh."

…I can't go back. Kyle will die. And I'm already dead!

"He won't die, idiot! No way we'd lose two friends! Damien talked to his dad, and you can come back."

I can go back?

Stan nodded.

I can go home.

Draik: Sorreeeee… I didn't mean for it to take so long! ;=.=

Kenny: WHERE'S DA CHAPTERS BEEN, BITCH?!

Draik: I'm SORRYYYYYY *sobs* I HAD SCHOOL!

Kyle: lame. LAAAAME.

Kenny: *shuffles off*

Draik: Where's he going?

Kenny: *coughcough* You'd been gone so long-! And I needed to be written about, and-

Stan: He cheated on you with other authors.

Draik: NU! YOU WHORE.

Kenny: D:

Draik: *hits with the hammerspace frying pan of magic awesomeness*

SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG! THANKS FOR BEARING WITH ME!