A./N.: Hi everyone! This is my first PD fanfic and I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy writing it. Please leave plenti of reviews.

Disclaimer: All characters belong to Disney.

The Queen's Commitments and Joseph's Secret

1. Am I Too Late?

Clarisse eyes widened at what Mia was suggesting. She blinked once and tried to calm her thoughts, which were raging at impossible speed through her mind. Both happy visions of an unsure future and painful memories of the past engulfed her for a moment. What Mia offered seemed impossible, miles away, but a small bubble of hope began to form in her chest, lifting her heart.

"Did you hear that?" she asked Charlotte tentatively, to stall for time.

For a moment Charlotte seemed unsure what to answer. Instead she directed her gaze straight ahead and formulated a diplomatic none-answer.

"Not if you didn't want me to", mumbled Charlotte, causing Clarisse to laugh nervously.

"Oh, Charlotte."

There was deep affection for the younger woman in her voice and she smiled at her. She handed her aide the earpiece back and fiddled with the coat of her dress. It was a nervous tick of her, the only she allowed herself to exhibit in public. She stepped slightly forward as Charlotte stepped back, giving her Queen as much privacy as was possible at the moment. Again Clarisse straightened her coat and called out her love's name.

"Joseph."

There he was. The most handsome man she had ever laid eyes on. The man who held her heart in his hands almost from the first moment they had set eyes on each other 35 years ago. The man who had saved her life numerous times and pieced it back together.

"Your Majesty?" he inquired, cold and distant.

Ever since she had turned him down, yet again, he had created a barrier between them and guarded his heart with the same fierceness with which he had previously guarded his Queen's life.

A lifetime of old-fashioned education battled with her heart. A woman did NOT ask a man to marry her. She waited demurely until she was asked but Clarisse realised with a jolt that Joseph HAD in fact asked her. All she had to do now was accept what he had offered ... if he still ... she just had to try to win him back!

"Dear Joseph", she spoke softly, feeling a weight being lifted off her shoulders.

Her smile was tender and loving and completely threw Joseph off guard. What was she playing at? His head cocked to the side and he quirked an eyebrow at her. Clarisse wasn't usually this insecure and evasive. Normally she always spoke clearly what upset or bothered her ... at least with him. He waited, not so patiently, for her to continue.

Clarisse was more nervous than ever before in her life, even before her wedding to Rupert. It seemed that so much more was at stake than before. Her life as Clarisse was. Once brought in contact with love, desire and dreams of a happy future with the man she loved, Clarisse was unwilling and unable to transform back into cold, collected and distant Queen Clarisse. Gathering her courage around her like a cloak, she swallowed and spoke the question burning a hole into her heart.

"Am I too late to ask you to accept my hand in marriage?"

It cost her more than she was willing to admit to herself. Suddenly she was an awkward teenager again, afraid of being rejected and humiliated.

Joseph coughed convulsively and looked overwhelmed. A thought crossed his mind; he would never be bored with Clarisse by his side. Never taking his eyes off her, he made a decision to change his life for life without her wasn't worth living and he wanted to spend the rest of his life showing this woman how much he loved her. He smiled still a little unsure if he had really understood correctly but played over his own nervousness with a joke.

"Well, I thought you'd never ask", he said at last, causing Clarisse to heave a sigh of relief. Then he turned to his second-in-command. "Shades, you're in charge now. Good luck with Lionel ... I'm going to a wedding."

He was eager to finally claim Clarisse as his wife while Clarisse herself stood somewhat shyly next to him and waited for his move.

Her doubts had been beaten down only momentarily. All of a sudden they came crushing back down on her. Doubts about what her people might say to all this. Doubts if she really had the makings to be Joseph's wife. Well, to be a wife again, period. She had grown rather accustomed to being in charge of her life. Doubts if she was enough for him. Her heart rate sped up and she became more nervous by each second that passed.

Joseph handed Shades his top hat and fumbled his earpiece off, tossing it carelessly into the hat. Then he turned back around to Clarisse and extended his hand for her to grab on.

Charlotte handed her Queen the bouquet of flowers Mia had handed her ... it seemed like hours ago. So much had happened in the meantime and at such great speed. Charlotte felt more than overwhelmed but also exhilarated on behalf of the woman she so admired. Clarisse deserved all the happiness in the world. Clarisse's hands shook a little as she took the flowers from her and smiled nervously at her aide. Charlotte saw in her eyes that her thoughts were reeling and terrifying her to no end. She smiled encouragingly at the older woman. That was the only fault in Clarisse; she tended to overthink everything.

Clarisse extended her own hand and put it gently on Joseph's before smiling nervously at him. He seemed to feel her anxiety for he took her hand and slid it through the crook of his arm. Then he smiled at her with all the love he felt for her in his eyes and started the slow walk down the aisle.

With each step Clarisse felt the doubts fall away again and she straightened her spine. Suddenly she became aware of the murmur and talk all around her in the church. Surely her people felt as overwhelmed as she did. In the attempt to lighten the mood and strengthen her own resolve, she tried to joke.

"I know it was short notice ... but you were all dressed."

The church erupted with giggles and quaffs and even Joseph chuckled. He was well aware of his bride's nerves. Gently he squeezed her hand a little and saw an answering smile spread over her face. She was now radiating happiness.

Finally they reached the altar with Joseph fretting every step if Clarisse might change her mind again and bolt. Clarisse on the other hand had made her decision and had never been one to back out at the last moment. She had chosen Joseph and would now see it through to the end ... A terrifying thought hit her and for a moment she stumbled.

Joseph immediately caught her by tensing the muscles in his arm and imperceptibly heaving her weight. From the onlookers' point of view it seemed as if Clarisse had only leaned in closer to her love. But Joseph felt the slight tremble throughout her body. He softly brushed against her, trying to wake her and drag her out of her thoughts. She smiled at him in response but only barely.

Clarisse's mind was in turmoil. Suddenly she didn't feel like the giddy bride with normal worries about her future but more and more like she had felt at her wedding to Rupert. She felt yet again like the sacrificial lamb, repeating the same words she had used so many years ago. "I will see it through to the end", she had convinced herself with fake bravado. It had been such a hollow statement, such naive nonsense and a stupid mistake. Was she about to do the same mistake again?

Joseph stood in front of the Archbishop and watched his wife handing Mia the flowers. She was beautiful and graceful and elegant. He had known the moment he had set eyes on her that there would be no other woman in his life. Always he had been attracted to her physically but slowly he had realized that the attraction was but a tiny part of what drew him to Clarisse. She was also quick-witted and intelligent, charming and warm, caring and open-minded. And then had come the day when he couldn't lie to himself anymore and had to admit that he had fallen head over heels in love with his Queen. His eyes now glistened with his love for her and the joy to finally being able to show it in public.

When Clarisse turned back towards Joseph she immediately noticed his eyes resting on her face. Hesitantly she raised her own eyes to meet his and was seared to the bones by the look of unadulterated love in them. No, it was no mistake to marry him! Joseph was the complete opposite of Rupert in every way. With him she could finally find happiness and real love.

"My Lord Archbishop, I would like to take this man as my husband if you please", she said serenely, again in control had with the Queen facade firmly in place.

The Archbishop raised his eyes heavenwards and sighed deeply.

"Finally!" he exclaimed softly, smiling indulgently down on Clarisse and Joseph.

Not for the first time this day, Clarisse felt her facade slip and she stared at her Archbishop and friend with wide eyes. Her smile vanished instantly and she chanced a peek at Joseph in astonishment. They had thought nobody had noticed a thing. Joseph, though, smiled at the Archbishop and squeezed Clarisse hand.

"We have come together for a different wedding", intoned the Archbishop without giving neither Clarisse nor Joseph the chance to reply. He was smiling softly and lovingly at his Queen. She deserved happiness more than anybody else he knew and he was ecstatic to bind her to the man who could provide such happiness for her.

Both Clarisse and Joseph didn't really pay attention to the words spoken until Sebastian Motaz nudged Joseph softly. It was time for him to make his vows.

"With this ring I thee ... finally", Joseph glanced cheekily at the Archbishop, "... wed."

He swore solemnly, meaning every word from the bottom of his heart. Nothing would ever change his love for this wonderful woman. Clarisse was overjoyed and couldn't contain her smiles or the moisture coming into her eyes.

"I pronounce you man and wife", said the Archbishop, drawing a faint gasp from Clarisse. "You may kiss the bride", he said at last.

Joseph, still holding both of Clarisse's hands in his, smiled lovingly at his blushing bride. For a moment it seemed Clarisse was overwhelmed and a bit scared. He wasn't quite sure what she could be afraid of. A kiss in a church packed with people was certainly not a big step ... even though Joe had to fight for control just standing next to her. Yes, he definitely desired this woman and her body. Finally he was in a position to live his fantasies. And then he was presented with a picture of the past.

----

He stood outside the Queen's suit at night as was his duty. Her Majesty had retired early seeing as her husband had settled down for a long night filled with alcohol, card games and crude men talk. Suddenly around 2 am Joe heard the soft clicking sound of a door's lock opening and closing again. Since the palace was silent every sound, even the tiniest, was amplified. Joe was enabled to hear every word spoken inside the suite.

"How much have you lost?" asked the queen.

The king only grunted and Joe heard the noises of someone taking off clothes.

"You better go to your own suite, Rupert. I am not in the mo..."

"Shut up", snarled the king and Joe heard the distinct sound of flesh hitting flesh. "You are my wife and will do as I say."

Joe had to spend the next hour clutching his hands into tight fists and staring straight ahead with anger and murder in his eyes while he was forced to listen to Clarisse's whimpers of pain and humiliation and the king's grunts.

----

Now his thumbs were softly stroking Clarisse's wrists as he reassured her with his eyes that he would never hurt her. Her eyes were still uncertain but suddenly a slight jerk went through her body and she swayed towards him. Clarisse trusted Joseph with her life, had done so for decades now, and she knew his love was pure and his soul gentle, despite the harshness of his profession. Over the years there had been many situations where he could have taken advantage of her vulnerability but he had never done so. And it was only a little ol' kiss.

Joseph jubilated on the inside. She had made the first move and given him permission to kiss her. Leaning forward, he met Clarisse in a gentle, quick peck. The moment their lips met, it was as if the world shrank and grinded to a halt. An electric spark had ignited between them and Joseph, yet again and not for the last time, found himself battling down his hormones. Clarisse's dilated eyes but soft smile told him more than words that she had felt it too.

Then Mia's whoop broke through to them and catapulted them back to earth. It was time to face the music.

----

In the horse-drawn carriage Clarisse took a seat, reeling with the realization of exactly what she had done. She had married Joseph! She had really married Joseph! The impact on her was almost unbearable. What would her people think of her now? What would the staff at the palace think? ...

Her thoughts stopped there as Joseph settled down beside her. He was shy and uncomfortable. Normally he would take his place standing behind his queen and now it almost felt as if he was deserting his post.

Shyly both newly-weds smiled at each. It would take them some time to get used to the new situation. Joseph took her hand and brought it to his lips, placing a soft kiss onto it, and Clarisse smiled more radiantly at him, extending her other hand to cup his cheek for a moment.

Cheering from the crowd around them effectively put an end to the exchange of tenderness. Squaring her shoulders and heaving a sigh, Clarisse bowed to the inevitable and graciously waved to her subjects. Joseph next to her waved too, albeit a bit shyly. Clarisse bit her lip to keep from laughing and whispered instead:

"Remember Mia's lessons."

Joseph grinned now and tried to imitate Clarisse's movement, ending up in more of a mockery so he gave up and just tipped his forehead in a quick salute. He had seen Kings and Prince Consorts do that. The approving nod from his bride told him that he had mastered the first hurdle as the man at the Queen's side.