A/N: Hi, dear reader. I don't know if you still remember where this fanfic last stopped, but I'm glad that you're here to drop by and read. I'm sorry, I'm careless. I forgot how much time I've been wasting. Although, I'm glad that there were nice "heartwarming" comments and reviews on the previous chapters. I'm still appalled of myself. You gorgeous person, you. Please read and review. It's only been 5 months. :3
I'm sorry.
SEVENTEEN
I walked home along with my sorrow. The roads were lonely, quiet and dull. It didn't seem this way when Haruna stayed by my side, walking. She would always stop by somewhere to pick up a coin or even notice a flying dandelion petal in the air. She believed in miracles. It was her dreams and wishes that helped her make me fall even more.
The emptiness I felt as I walked by the places we used to stop by was such a pierce in the heart. Her voice, her appearance and even her scent keep flashing through my senses. I pause for a while at the park where we first kissed. It was also the place where we make up for every fight we have. I fight this overwhelming urge to run back to her home and just beg, on my knees to make her change her mind.
But it looks like nothing can change her mind now.
I arrived home at approximately 12am. It was still cold outside. The weather was matching the coldness in my heart.
The bed I laid down on was so much harder for some reason. My body ached. My head ached. My heart ached so much.
I stay in one position where I lay back on my pillow, staring at the ceiling, face and mind, utterly blank. It was just like what Haruna once said. Falling in love was easy, and it makes you really happy. But it doesn't last forever. And imagining the pain is so much easier than actually experiencing it.
My eyes were about to give in. I want to cry all night. I didn't think that I'd get hurt this much ever in my life.
How will I sleep? How can I fast forward time? How can I rewind it? Will she still give me a chance? Will I ever get to speak to her again?
I want to ask so much. I want things to happen. I really, really do.
Ehe. I'm desperate. Who would have thought that the great Yoh Komiyama would ever experience isolation?
Who would have known that Haruna was all that I needed to feel secure, accompanied, and complete?
Wow. I'm cliché. This feels weird.
As I rose from my temporary death, I felt the heaviness of my whole body. My heart was as if it was about to fall from my arteries. I am close to hopelessness. I'm becoming emo.
Damn.
The seconds turned into minutes, and the minutes turned into hours. I haven't gotten a single wink of sleep.
I'm a mess.
I looked at the mirror to see my hair all messed up, my nose; red from all the sniffing, and my eyes sore from all the crying.
Yes, I admit defeat. My tears fell as heavy as they are. The lump in my throat faded as droplets of salty liquid streak down my face.
Am I gay?
What am I doing? How could I be thinking of negative things? A calm, cool man would've dealt with this maturely. He would have sat down on his bed and thought of what he should do. He would think of the positive.
This is my way of dealing with this problem:
1. I sit on my bed, crying my eyes out while swinging myself forward and backward.
2. I stand up a few seconds after swinging and start walking from the left side of my room to the right.
3. I constantly do this for approximately 4 hours.
That's it. I'm going crazy. This is not me. This is a lost puppy.
But who could blame me? I feel like I'm a lost puppy in the Milky Way.
I'm miles away from home.
Being with Haruna was my only home.
I bury my face into my hands. My eyes are shut. The whole world was dark.
What's the difference? When my eyes are open, all I see is a dull room. A dull world is all that was around me.
I need Haruna.
I need her now.
A/N: The update was super late because I had to apply for college and a lot of stuff came up. I sure hope you people still click that green button down there.
The next update will come out as soon as I'm done with it. I'll promise if you review my lovelies! :3