This is just a little piece of fun I wanted to share with you all. My apologies for highly un-Jane Austen dialogue. Enjoy!

Episode 1

Scene 1 :

Bingley : What a beautiful place !

Darcy: If you don't mind living with savages.

Elizabeth: Mmm! Interesting point of view. Let's show to the audience that I'm really free.

Scene 2:

Mr Bennet and Lizzy: Our family is stupid but they are fun anyway.

Jane: I want to marry for love.

Elizabeth: So do I.

Scene 3:

Bingley: I love the country. I love country dances and I loooove Bennet eldest girl.

Darcy and Bingley's sisters: Heaven save us from country savages.

Bingley: Come on Darcy. Dance.

Darcy: No. Go away. I don't want your leftovers.

Elizabeth: Oh I hate him. I will make fun of him to make me feel better.

Darcy: She is laughing at ME?!

Mrs Bennet: (raves about everything concerning Bingley)

Mr Bennet: Spare me!

Mrs Bennet: (raves about Darcy)

Elizabeth: I don't care for him. Have I said that before?

Miss Bingley: Let's find out if I have a rival.

Bingley: Jane is an angel.

Scene 4:

Darcy: The wall is such a good place.

Sir William (to Bingley's sisters): Now how about a visit to St James with me?

Bingley's sisters: Help!

Miss Bingley: My poor Darcy. Standing there all alone.

Darcy: Hmmm. Nice eyes!

Elizabeth: Why does he stare at me like that?

Lydia: Let's dance and make a lot of noise.

Sir William: What about dancing with Miss Elizabeth?

Darcy: Why not?

Elizabeth: Certainly not.

Darcy: Really nice eyes!

Miss Bingley: Whose eyes are you talking? (Mine, of course!)

Darcy: Not yours.

Scene 5:

Mrs Bennet: We must secure Bingley with all haste. I have an idea. Let's get you sick. Yes, brilliant!

Jane: Achoo

Bingley's sisters: That is what we thought. Baaad family.

Elizabeth: I'm going to show how free I am again.

Darcy: She is even better in such disarray.

Bingley: Whatever will make Jane happy, will make me happy. Stay here with us.

Darcy and Bingley's sisters: Oh great.

Miss Bingley: Let's see if I can redirect his attention.

Darcy: Think again.

Scene 6:

Elizabeth: Ooops! Wrong room.

Darcy: I don't know what to say (bows)

Elizabeth: Let's leave this room quick.

Darcy: What have I done to her to deserve that?

Miss Bingley: Georgiana is such a great girl.

Bingley: All young ladies are so accomplished these days.

Darcy: I have another opinion to make the author and screenwriter write a few more lines.

Miss Bingley: I have all the qualities of an accomplished lady.

Elizabeth: And I take pleasure in contradicting Darcy.

Darcy: This woman is driving me crazy!

Scene 7:

Mrs Bennet: Right. Plan of this day: Let Jane stay here as long as possible, praise Mr Bingley once again, insult Mr Darcy.

Elizabeth: I'm so ashamed.

Bingley's sisters: Suffer Miss Bennet, suffer.

Darcy: Let's have a bath to have all the viewers drool over me.

Elizabeth: Once again I'm so free.

Miss Bingley: Maybe I can distract him from his reading.

Darcy: You wish!

Miss Bingley: Let's resort to plan B.

Darcy and Elizabeth debate again.

Darcy: I am mad about this woman. I must not. I must not.

Darcy: I am glad she departs at last. Am I really?

Elizabeth (about Jane and Bingley): Look at these two love birds. It is so cute.

Elizabeth: I am so glad to go home.