The idea for this one shot was given to me by another reader (A Lost Angel) and I'd like to thank him for it. I hope you all enoy and feel free to review as this is my first attemt at writing a humourous tale. For more information on my upcoming profects feel free to check out my bio. Thanks.

Naruto's Great Ramen Challenge

Konoha – Mid Morning

"C'mon Sakura-chan," Naruto begged. "No way Naruto," Sakura responded. "Sakura-chan," Naruto said, "You got too. I mean, I'll be leaving with the purvey sage for two and a half years in two days! This will be our last chance to be together! Let's go out on a date!" Sakura was annoyed. For the past three days Naruto had been asking her out non stop. And he had spotted her on her way to Tsunade-sama and continued his assault. Why couldn't he be satisfied with just being her friend? True Sasuke was gone, but Naruto had to know how she still felt about Sasuke. If this were a year or two ago Sakura would have told Naruto to go jump in a lake. But she had grown to like Naruto. He had become one of her dearest friends. That's how she wanted it to stay. But she didn't have the heart to be mean to him.

"Sakura-chan," Naruto said, "Sakura-chan, did you hear me?" Sakura was desperate and as she walked she came up with a brilliant idea. "Ok Naruto," she said, "I'll go out with you." "You will," Naruto screamed as he jumped up and down and danced awkwardly. God, Sakura thought, he's a terrible dancer too. "I'll go out with you Naruto," Sakura continued, "under one condition. You have to cook the meal." Naruto immediately stopped dancing and stared blankly at Sakura and said, "Me….cook….but….ahhh….ummm." I knew it, Sakura thought; I knew that would get him. Naruto may love food but everyone knows he was the worst cook in our class. There's no way he'll be able to make me anything and he knows it. He'll give up for sure.

Much to Sakura's surprise, Naruto began to smile and then gave her the thumbs up sign. "No problem Sakura-chan," Naruto said confidently, "I've been training on my cooking skills and I've become a great cook!" "What," Sakura screamed, "But….when….how? I mean when did you find the time to learn to cook?" "Well," Naruto said, "When not on a mission or training I had to find something to do right? So I worked on my cooking!!" Naruto then turned and ran away and as he ran he turned to Sakura and waived and yelled, "Tomorrow night Sakura-chan. You'll taste the greatest meal you've ever had!! Believe it!!"

Sakura stood dumbfounded as she watched Naruto run off. As he disappeared around the corner she suddenly slapped her forehead and screamed, "I just had to say yes! I just had to challenge him to cook the meal! God I am such a dumbass!!"

As Naruto turned the corner he came to a sudden halt and leaned against the wall. His face turned from excitement to fear and concern. Damn it, he thought, why did Sakura have to ask me to cook the meal? I can't cook! What the hell am I gonna do? I promised her the greatest meal ever! Trying to formulate some type of plan, Naruto came up with an idea. Getting up he began to run in the opposite direction. I know what to do, he thought, I'll just go to the chef of the greatest ramen in the world, Teuchi. I'll pay him to make our meals and Sakura-chan will never know the difference. Naruto couldn't help but laugh over the brilliance of his plan.

Konoha – Ichiraku Ramen Bar

"No, no, no," Naruto screamed as he read the sign over the closed restaurant. "Owner Away on Business." Naruto felt instantly nauseous. He fell to his knees and slammed his fist on the ground. What am I gonna do now, he thought. This is it. This was my big chance with Sakura-chan and I'm gonna blow it. It was then Naruto heard someone say, "What's going on Naruto." Naruto looked up to see Shikamaru and Choji approaching. "Dude," Shikamaru said, "What's wrong with you? You look like Choji when someone tells him we're out of food." Naruto got to his feet and walked over to his friends and began to tell them the entire story.

Shikamaru and Choji listened intently as Naruto explained and as his story came to an end they both stared at Naruto quietly. Then they looked at each other and broke out into raucous laughter. "Man," Choji said, "are you in over your head. You can't cook!" "I know, I know," Naruto said as something dawned on him, "But you can Choji! In fact you and Shikamaru were the best cooks in our class!" "No way Naruto," Choji said as he raised his hands in protest, "I've got no interest in helping you trick Sakura-chan. Besides if she found out, she'd skin me alive. And I like my skin, it keeps me warm."

"Oh come on Choji," Naruto said, "Sakura isn't that bad! Besides, as a ninja you guys have to help a comrade in need and I'm desperate. You guys have to help me!!" Shikamaru rolled his eyes and put his hands to the back of his head. "Damn Naruto," he said, "You always have something going on. You're damned troublesome is what you are." Naruto smiled. He knew whenever Shikamaru called him troublesome it was right before he would agree to help. "Fine," Shikamaru said, "We'll help."

Naruto pumped his fist, "Yes," he said, "I knew you would!! You guys won't regret this!! Get all the guys together tomorrow and remember whatever you do, don't tell Ino or Hinata. Those girls will tell Sakura-chan for sure!"

Konoha – The Next Day

The Sun was high in the sky, it was about noon and several of the boys including, Shikamaru, Choji, Lee, Neji and Kiba stood in front of a large store room just south of Ichiraku Ramen Bar. They stood shoulder to shoulder as Naruto paced back and forth in front of them. "All right men," Naruto said, "You know our mission! We have six hours to create the greatest meal Sakura-chan has ever had! Now, I know none of you are gourmet chefs, but damn it, we're shinobi! Shinobi, never back down from a challenge! If we meet an impossible task, we find a way! We've defeated strong ninja and we can do this, right!!"

Everyone seemed to look at Naruto with a dejected, disinterested expression, except Lee, who leapt forward and pumped his fist. "Yes, yes, yes," he screamed, "We can do this Naruto-kun! We won't let you down!! We will overcome this challenge! I promise you that if I fail I will run three; no four hundred laps around Konoha!!" "Yeesh," Shikamaru said, "Neji, why did you bring him along?" "He over heard us talking about this and insisted on helping out," Neji responded.

Kiba kept staring at Naruto and for a while thought better of asking the question he was sure everyone else had on his mind. In the end he decided to go ahead anyway. "Uh, Naruto," Kiba asked, "What's with the green helmet?" Naruto stopped walking, removed the helmet and stared at Kiba. "Well," he said, "Since I am the leader of this mission I should where the hat of a general!" "Oooook," Choji said, "If we're going to cook I guess we need a kitchen." Naruto smiled and said, "I already thought of that."

Naruto walked passed them and up to the door of the store room. Turning to face everyone he said, "You see, as Ichiraku's greatest patron I am privy to many secrets. One of which is where Teuchi practices his new recipes away from prying eyes." Naruto then turned and, using a key unlocked the storage room and swung the door back. "Behold," he screamed.

As they all walked into the large room they were all amazed at what stood before them. On every wall as far as the eye could see was ingredients, meats, dried noodles. In one corner bags of flour were piled nearly to the ceiling and off to the left was a large freezer piled with fresh fish and meat. As they walked in their senses were overwhelmed by the sweet fragrances of fruits and spices. Choji walked a few feet further than the others and dropped to his knees and began to cry. "This," he said, "Is by far the most beautiful sight I have ever seen!" "Hey Choji," Naruto said, "We're here to cook not eat dude." "Hey Naruto," Shikamaru said, "There's no way Teuchi would let you know about this place. Much less give you a key. How'd you really find out about this place?"

"Ok," Naruto said, "I followed him one night and saw him go into here. I found out where he hid the key and snuck in after he went home. It was seven or eight years ago, ok." Shikamaru smiled, "I knew it." "Look," Naruto said, "How I found this place doesn't matter. What does is that we've got all the ingredients to make the greatest ramen dish of all time. So let's do this thing!"

Hearing Naruto's passionate speech, all the boys ran off and grabbed aprons and caps to cover their heads. Once dressed they all gathered again. "Alright Naruto," Lee said, "What are we making?" "We're gonna create the worlds greatest Ramen that's what!!!" "Ooook," Neji said, "And how do we do that, exactly?" Naruto's smile slowly faded from his face as he considered this for seemingly the first time. Scratching his head he said, "Ummm, well I figured all of us combined could come up with something." "What," Shikamaru said, "None of us are good cooks. In fact only Choji is any good and he's only passable."

"Passable," Choji screamed as he looked angrily at Shikamaru, "But last month when I made those treats you said they were incredible. You took some home!" "Yea," Shikamaru said as he laughed nervously, "Those things were terrible. I actually gave them to Kiba for Akamaru." Kiba then said, "Ah, I wondered where you got those dog treats from." "Dog treats," Choji screamed, "I can't believe you gave them to Akamaru….."

Naruto then interrupted, "Hey guys can we focus on my problem here?! Ok, so let's just split this up into tasks. Choji and Lee will be in charge of cooking the pork and fish. Shikamaru will make the rice. Kiba will handle the broth and soup and Neji will cook the vegetables and I'll take care of the spices. Alright team…..Let's do this thing!!!" The boys then split up and ran off to their posts. Naruto started gathering all the spices everyone would need and began to prepare them while Choji and Lee ran into the freezer. Kiba leapt up and grabbed a large pot and began to fill it with water while Shikamaru took another pot for the rice.

For a while things seemed to be going well until Naruto heard a large crash and screaming coming from the freezer. As he and the others arrived at the door, Naruto swung it open to see Choji and Lee argueing and Lee holding a large fish trying to defend himself. "I'm telling you we need to make a meal with fish," Lee screamed angrily. "No way," Choji responded, "Fish is no good for this kind of meal! Only pork will do! And if you can't see that you're an idiot!" "Why you bastard," Lee screamed "How dare you call me an idiot! I challenge you right here and now!" "Bring it little man," Choji said.

"Hold it," Naruto screamed, "quit fighting the both of you!" "I have an idea," Lee said, "let's ask Naruto. It's his meal anyway. Besides just because you're fat doesn't mean you know the best when it comes to food." Hearing those words, Naruto, Shikamaru and Kiba grew nervous. It was then Lee remembered his mistake and turned to see Choji who was now red with anger. "Did you," Choji said, "just call me FAT!!!" Naruto and Shikamaru quickly leapt at Choji in an attempt to stop his rage as Lee began swinging the large fish in an attempt to defend himself.

Meanwhile – Just outside the storage area

Kakashi was walking down the road reading his newest novel. He was definitely enjoying his day off and seemed deeply engrossed in his book. As he walked by the storage area he heard the screams coming from the room including a deep yell from Choji and Lee. What the hell is going on in there, he thought. For a moment he considered checking things out but then again. This is my day off, he thought. Whatever's happening in there doesn't concern me. And with that Kakashi returned to his book and walked away.

Meanwhile – Back in the Kitchen

Shikamaru and Naruto had managed to finally get Choji under control and pinned him against the far wall. "Damn," Naruto said, "Choji get's pretty damned strong when he's upset." "Yep," Shikamaru said, "too bad we couldn't get to him in time." Lee, who was lying on his back on the floor then sat up and spit out the fish that Choji had stuffed down his throat. "I'd like to apologize to Choji," he said, "Like you said, you are not fat. You're just husky. Naruto, if you don't mind, I'm gonna take a little nap now." And as he said that Lee fell back to the floor and passed out.

A few moments later Naruto and Shikamaru emerged from the freezer carrying an unconscious Lee. They placed him in the corner and noticed that despite the commotion Neji had not moved from where he was. "Yo Neji," Naruto said, "How come you didn't come to help." "You had things under control," Neji said, "Besides, there was nothing to see. Lee acted like an idiot, called Choji fat and got his ass kicked." "You're a cold dude," Shikamaru said. Neji just looked at them and shrugged.

As Naruto was returning to his table he caught a wonderful scent. Looking over he could see Kiba standing over his big pot and went over to him. "Kiba," Naruto said smiling, "your broth smells great. What did you put in it." Kiba smiled in appreciation, "Oh, it's just an old family recipe." "Shikamaru came by and asked, "Shouldn't you be using the large spoon to twirl the broth." No need," Kiba said as he lifted the cover, "Akamaru's got that covered." Looking into the pot, Shikamaru and Naruto saw little Akamaru spinning around and around in the broth.

Naruto and Shikamaru looked at each other as they both felt nauseous and turned away to throw up. Once done Naruto looked at Kiba who seemed confused by their reaction. "Kiba," Naruto screamed, "You can't put Akamaru in the broth!!" "Why not," he said, "this is how we cook in my family. Our dogs always help." "Shikamaru then suddenly stood up straight. "Always," he asked. "Yep," Kiba said, "Our dogs always help in some way in preparing the food. Why?" Shikamaru then thought back to a month ago when he was invited to Kiba's for dinner. Once again he was nauseous and ran to find a bathroom. Naruto turned red with rage and pointed to the corner where Lee slept, "Go sit over by Lee," Naruto said. Kiba walked over and slumped down by Lee as Naruto said, "You too Akamaru." Akamaru barked and leapt out of the pot and sat on Kiba's lap.

Meanwhile, Neji is stood by his table continuing to slice his vegetables when out of the corner of his eye, he saw movement. He turned and looked under the nearby cupboards but saw nothing. Then again, he saw movement behind him. Turning sharply he found nothing there. What the hell is going on, the thought. "Byakugan," Neji said as he activated his power. Looking around he saw nothing until he looked at a small mass of chakra hidden in a nearby cupboard. What is that, Neji thought as he crept closer. As Neji slowly opened the cupboard a small furry creature leapt out and grabed hold of his face.

Neji jumped to his feet and screamed while running frantically, "Oh hell, what is this thing! Get it off me!! Get it off me!!" Hearing the noise, Shikamaru, Kiba, Choji and Naruto race to Neji and as they arrive they stop in amazement at what they see. "Oh my God," Shikamaru said, "Is that, is that an…..?" "Yep," Naruto replied as he smiled, "It's an Onbaa." Naruto, Shikamaru, Choji and Kiba burst into laughter as they watched the baby Onbaa clinging to Neji's back. Neji grew ever angrier and eventually yelled, "Alright, now that you've had your fun can you please get this damned thing off of me?!" "Alright, alright," Shikamrau said as he grabbed the Onbaa and tried to pull it off. After a while Shikamaru stopped, "Man, this thing is stuck on tight. Hey guys try to help me here." Choji, Kiba and Naruto ran over and grabbed at the Onbaa and pulled but even combined they couldn't free Neji. "Now what," Choji asked as Shikamaru and Naruto looked at each other in silent agreement.

"This is completely embarrassing," Neji said as he sat next to Kiba and an unconscious Lee. The Onbaa was still clinging to his back and was now digging through his hair. "Sorry Neji," Naruto said, "but we don't have time to help you right now. As soon as we finish cooking we'll get him off you." Naruto, Shikamaru and Choji returned to their cooking and after a while things began to run smoothly. About an hour later Lee began to wake up. "Ooooh," he moaned as he held his head, "What hit me?"

"Choji," Shikamaru responed. "Man," Lee said as he got to his feet, "Sorry Choji. I'll never call you that again." Choji nodded in acceptance of his apology as Lee returned to help the others leaving Neji and Kiba to watch. Another hour passed and things were still going well. Naruto walked over to check on the broth he was making and picked up a bottle of cooking cherry when he noticed it was empty. "Hey," he said, "what happened to the cherry? "Oh," Kiba said, "Lee said he was thirsty and drank it."

Everyone immediately stopped what they were doing. "Lee drank that," Neji asked nervously. "Yea," Kiba said, "So what." "Kiba," Shikamaru said, "don't you know there's alcohol in this!" "So," Kiba said who was now more than a little confused. Suddenly everyone heard the crash of several pots and they turned to see a red faced Lee, who swayed from side to side. Oh hell, Naruto thought. Slurring his words and seemingly on the brink of passing out Lee said, "Hey! You guys…..let's….let's do some training! This cooking stuff is booooooring! It's not like this is gonna make Sakura love ya or nothing!!"

Neji and Kiba got to there feet slowly as Shikamaru cautiosly approached Lee. "Lee," he said, "why don't you sit down and rest?" "Nah," Lee said, "I'm good Shika!! Let's do some trainin'!!" "I think we're going to have to restrain him Shikamaru," Neji said. "Restrain me," Lee said drunkenly, "C'mon and try it pretty boy!"

Meanwhile – Just outside

Kakashi was walking back the other way. He had just finished his novel and was looking forward to getting something to eat. When from the storage he heard screams once again and the voices of Naruto and his friends. Once again he considered investigating what was happening when he heard several large crashes. Thinking better of the whole thing, Kakashi walked away whistling to himself.

Meanwhile – Back in the Kitchen

Seconds. That's all it took to destroy hours worth of work. Lee, in his drunken state was like a whirlwind. In trying to restrain him Lee became enraged and when he wasn't slithering out of their grasp he was throwing them left and right and attacking in a drunken flurry of punches and kicks. Lee's fighting style was completely unpredictable and in the ensuing melee pots and pans went flying, spices were dashed to the ground, plates and glasses were broken. The food that was being prepared was all thrown to the ground and everyone was left a mess. Finally they were able to restrain Lee and tied him up. Lee now lay on the ground, sleeping off his drunken stupor. But the damage was already done.

"Damn," Shikamaru said, "Lee ruined everything! What are we going to do now?" "The only thing we can do," Naruto responded, "we start over and try to get it right. Kiba we'll need your help. Just keep Akamaru away from the food from now on." "You got it," Kiba said.

After cleaning up some of the mess, they got back to cooking and a few hours later they had finished their meal. "Alright," Naruto said proudly as they stood over the large pot of Ramen, "We did it guys. This is got to be the greatest meal ever!!" "Well," Choji said, "We should probably taste it first before saying that right. "No problem," Naruto said as he took two chop sticks and took a taste. For a moment everyone stared at Naruto waiting for his response. Suddenly they saw Naruto's face turn green as he quickly turned away and began to hurl.

"It can't be that bad," Choji said as he took a taste. Within moments Choji turned green and also began to vomit. Kiba then got close to the pot and sniffed it and his face instantly distorted in disgust. "Man," he said, "We went wrong somewhere!" Naruto then stood up straight and wiped his mouth. "That's stuff is disgusting," he said. "Well," Neji said, "Maybe we can give this to Onbaa." Neji then leaned over the pot allowing Onbaa to smell the food. Taking a whiff the Onbaa yelped and leapt of his back and scurried off out of the kitchen.

"Well," Neji said, "At least we know what can get rid of an Onbaa." Naruto looked at the clock and began to panic. "Guys," he said, "We've got two hours left! What the hell are we going to do!?" It was then the door to the kitchen flew open and they turned to see a person standing there. As their eyes adjusted to the light they saw it was Shino. Shino closed the door and walked up towards them. "What's going on guys," he said. "Shino," Shikamaru said, "How'd you find us?" "My bugs found you," he said, "it was obvious you guys left me out of whatever you were doing."

"So what are you up too," Shino asked. "We were trying to create a meal that Sakura would love so I can convince her to go on a date with me. But we messed up and all we could make was this." Shino leaned over the pot and then moved back and said, "Yep, that's some nasty crap you got there. Naruto, you really should make an effort to know you're friends better. If you did you'd know I'm an excellent cook. In fact I cook all the time when not on a mission." Everyone stared in amazement. "Shino," Naruto said, "You can cook?" "Of course," Shino said,"Didn't Kiba tell you, he knows I can."

Slowly Naruto and the others turned and looked at Kiba angrily who was staring at the roof as if trying to remember. "Oh yeah," he said, "That's right. Shino is a great cook. I forgot about that." "You forgot," Naruto yelled as he tried to grab Kiba by the neck. Shikamaru, Neji and Choji grabbed Naruto and struggled to pry him off of Kiba as Shino asked, "Naruto, would you like me to make you a meal?" Naruto let Kiba go a quickly turned to Shino. "Yes," he said desperately, "Shino, you've got to help me!" "Consider it done," Shino replied.

The Next Morning

She had been training since early in the morning. Tsunade wasn't lying when she told her how difficult this would be. For the past few hours she has stood in the same place. Standing in front of this large, dying fish trying her best to save its life. She stood using her chakra to first flow through the fish to determine the reason it was dying. Then she had to use her chakra to halt the cellular degradation and then repair the damage. Each step required precise control and maximum focus. She had failed twenty times already today.

Then finally, it happened, the fish leapt up, flashing around and she quickly put it back in the water. Excited, she turned to see her sensei sitting behind her on the couch watching. "Good work Sakura," she said, "rest for a few minutes and we'll do it again." Sakura smiled and immediately sat down and looked at the fish swimming. The training was hard, the hardest thing she has ever done. But it was worth it. She would get stronger. Like Naruto will. Naruto, she thought.

Up until a few years ago she had seen him as a loser and a nuisance. Now, he was her inspiration and one of her closest friends. And until last night, that's all she saw him as. But last night she saw something more, so much more. Naruto had stopped by on time and to her surprise, was well dressed and clean. "Sakura-chan," he said while blushing, "You look great. Umm, the meal is ready as promised." He led her out into the forest and into a clearing where she saw a table, two chairs and a candle in the middle.

Initially she found herself amazed at the elaborate setup and was somewhat speechless. Naruto had definitely put some thought into this. He pulled out her chair and had her sit and then placed a covered dish in front of her. "Well," he said smiling, "I hope you like it." As he said this he lifted the cover and the first thing Sakura noticed was the delicious aroma. Naruto sat down across from her and waited anxiously as she took her first taste of the ramen.

Sakura tasted it and for while just let the flavor wash over her taste buds. After a few moments Naruto was happy to see her smile and say, "Well Naruto, this isn't the best meal I've ever had. But, it is pretty good." For the next two hours they ate and talked about nothing of real importance. They spoke of her training and his upcoming trip and once, only once, they spoke of Sasuke, and the good times they had. After diner Naruto walked her home and they said their goodbyes and Sakura, much to her own surprise, kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks for diner Naruto," she said as she closed her door.

And now, looking at this fish that she had saved, Sakura felt a single tear roll down her cheek. And it was then she realized something. She realized that she would miss Naruto, so much more than she ever thought. Be careful Naruto, she thought, and hurry back home.

Meanwhile – Near the main gate of Konoha

"So how was last night," Iruka said. He and Naruto were just finishing up a bowl of Ramen at Ichiraku's as he asked that question. "Great," he said as he smiled brightly. Iruka smiled, "Well that's a great way to say good bye to a person Naruto. I'm glad it worked out. Now, you be careful on this long trip Naruto." "Hey," Naruto said, "I'm a ninja of the Leaf and the future Hokage. This will be no problem at all!"

"Let's get going Naruto," Jiraiya said as he looked in. Naruto took his list big gulp and then called out to Teuchi and said, "Thanks for the ramen. Oh, and one last thing Teuchi-san I had to use your store room yesterday." Teuchi was shocked and said, "What, how did you even get in there!?" "I knew where the key was," Naruto said. "Sorry but you were away and I couldn't wait for you to come back. Listen I made a little mess in there. I hope you don't mind. I'll make it up to you when I get back."

Naruto then ran to catch up to Jiraiya and yelled, "I'm off Iruka-sensei!" And as he made his way to the gate, Naruto thought of all the friends he's made. All the friends he was leaving. He thought of Sakura, he thought of how much she smiled last night. And of that kiss. He thought of Sasuke and of how much stronger he had to and was going to become. And then he smiled and turned to the large mountain overlooking his home. That mountain was his hope, his inspiration and a constant reminder of his goal. He raised his hand and clenched his fist knowing that one day…… "Watch me," he said.

"Hey what are you doing," Jiraiya asked, "Let's go Naruto!!" "Coming," Naruto said as he ran off.

Later on that Day

Made a little mess huh, Teuchi said as he scrubbed the floor. He looked around and saw pots and pans scattered, dishes broken, spices and flour spilled everywhere. I swear Naruto when you get back here you'll pay like never before, he thought. Then he heard a feint noise but before he could react a small furry create leapt from out of the shadows and clung to his back. Startled Teuchi jumped up and looked behind him to see a little Oonba hanging on. "Oh you'll pay," he said angrily, "You'll pay alright, NAAARUUUUTOOOOOO!!!!"

Fin.