Edited and updated!
Warnings: Naughty language and boys kissing
Disclaimer: I don't own South Park. If I did there would be lots of yaoi.
(The boys are supposed to be aged 14 in this.)
I Dare You To Kiss Him
by Mootycakes
This lazy Saturday afternoon we find our favorite quartet of fourteen year old Hell raisers taking a break from their scheming ways to hang around their their clubhouse, the treehouse in Stan's backyard. Kenny managed to steal some Playboys from his stepfather, Stan snuck some beer from the back of his dad's mini-fridge, Kyle brought homemade cookies, not telling anyone he made them himself in fear of being called a faggot, and Cartman, being the selfish fellow he is, brought nothing along but his racist and prejudiced jokes.
After the boys ingested their fare share of cookies and beer each, Cartman's share being twice as much as any others', they sat in a circle preparing for another fun game of truth or dare. It always seemed to provide a high level of entertainment for them. There's never a lack of creativity on the dares or cruelty in the truths asked. Last time they managed to get Kenny to go to school completely nude and act as if he didn't notice anything was amiss until Mr. Mackey, now working as the junior high school student counselor, went nuclear on him. Kyle also admitted to being gay, and amazingly Cartman only made one jab at his expense.
"Alright guys," Kenny begins, holding an empty bottle in his hand, "I'll start." He sets the bottle in the center of their circle and spins it around. After a few seconds it stops and points to Kyle.
"Oh yes," Cartman snickers. "This is gonna be good. Anything else you want to profess to us? Sex change perhaps?"
"Shut it fatass! You're the bitch here, are you sure you're not going to get a sex change?" Kyle retorts.
"Ay! Suck my balls Jew!"
"You'd enjoy that wouldn't you faggot?"
"Okay guys!" Stan interrupts their argument. "What's it gonna be Kyle? Truth or dare?"
"Why do you ask him? It's always truth. He's too much of a pussy to take a dare."
"Fuck you fatass!" Kyle yells at Cartman. "Give me a dare, Kenny." That shut him up. Cartman glares back at Kyle as Kenny smirks.
"He was right guys, this is gonna be good," Kenny says. "Okay then Kyle, I've got a good one for you. Since you and Cartman won't ever shut the fuck up, I was thinking you could use your mouths for something else. I dare you to kiss him."
Kyle and Cartman's mouths both drop open in shock. "What the fuck Kenny?!" Cartman yells.
"The kiss has to be on the mouth, last for at least thirty seconds, and include tongue. It has to be real and you have to pretend that you're enjoying it. If Cartman is too pussy to go along with it I'm sure Stan will be happy to oblige," he finishes and gives the teens a mischievous smirk.
"I can't believe this dude," Kyle sputters.
"You're the one who said dare," Stan laughs.
"Well Stan, you better pucker up then, because Cartman is way too pussy to go along with that dare," Kyle says. "You're probably afraid of catching my gay Jew diseases right?"
"Ay! Fuck you Kahl!"
"Oh that's original. Come up with some new material tubby."
"I'm not fat anymore asshole!"
Cartman growls and grabs the front of Kyle's shirt, pulling the other boy up to him. "Too pussy huh?" He asks before harshly shoving his lips against Kyle's own, shoving his tongue in Kyle's mouth when he gasps in shock. Slowly Kyle begins to reciprocate the kiss, moaning softly he threads his fingers in Cartman's hair. Kenny wolf whistles at the pair and Stan stares at them in shock. After what seems like thirty seconds, Cartman roughly shoves Kyle away from him, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. He glares hotly at Kyle. "He said to pretend to enjoy it faggot, not moan for more like a bitch."
Kyle gives him a hurt look. "God dammit Cartman," Stan mutters under his breath. "Let's move on. Your turn to spin Kyle."
"I can't stay, dude. I've got some shit to take care of at home. So, I'll see you later," he says, rushing out of the treehouse.
"What a fucking faggot," Cartman jokes after Kyle is out of sight.
"God dammit Cartman!" Stan yells. "Give him a fucking break!" He looks over at Kenny. "And I can't believe you would be so stupid to dare him to do something like that."
Kenny gives him a confused look and shrugs at him chuckling lightly. "What? I thought the queer-mo would like a little homo affection."
"Ay! I'm not a faggot you poor piece of shit!" Cartman yells in response. Kenny snorts in amusement.
"Yeah, well maybe it was something Kyle would like a little too much," Stan said while giving Kenny a knowing look that has him staring back in shock.
"No fucking way dude," he starts as Cartman chugs another beer. "He's into fatass?" He laughs heartily. "No fucking way!"
Cartman sputters and spits out a mouthful of beer onto Stan. "He's what?!"
"Into you," Kenny answers. "I thought that much was obvious considering how thoroughly he was kissing you. You know I was joking right? I didn't think you actually wanted to kiss him, but it looks like you wanted it even more than he did."
A blushing Cartman yells at him, "Ay! Screw you asshole! Fuck this shit! I'm going home!" He grabs a couple cookies before jumping out of the tree.
"They'll be together before long," Kenny laughs.
Stan sighs heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose, "That's what I'm afraid of."
Author's Note: I don't really care for this story. I thought up and fell in love with the concept, but I don't think I finished it all too well. It feels pretty forced to me. Let me know what you guys think in a review please. Criticisms are welcome!