Title: I'm Alive 5/5

Author: Alyce Gates

Rating: T

Pairing: Dean/Cas

Spoilers: Everything through the end of Season 4 is fair game. I have heard a few spoilers for season 5, but none of them are included in this fic.

Summary: Just another version of what happens after the end of Season 4. A little angst, a little humor, a little romance and a happy ending. ;-)

Disclaimer: Characters are not mine, I just like to play with them.

Dedication: This is dedicated to Ashley and Nicola both of whom made this story possible. You two are awesome!

I'm Alive 5/5

Dean lined up six empty beer cans on the fence behind Bobby's house and then turned and walked back to where Castiel was waiting.

"Is this really necessary?" The former angel asked with a pout.

"You need to be able to defend yourself, Cas." Dean insisted, selecting a gun from the duffle he'd brought with him.

"I doubt a gun would do much good against Lucifer," Castiel pointed out.

Dean rolled his eyes and tried not to let his irritation get the better of him. Part of him was just glad that Castiel was talking to him again. The former angel had been quiet and withdrawn since they had gone to church a few days ago. He always seemed to have some excuse to leave the room whenever Dean came in. Castiel had also stopped asking the hunter for hugs. Dean was surprised by just how much he missed them.

A little while ago Dean had found Cas and Sam talking on the front porch. Castiel had seemed lost in thought while Sam was trying, and failing, not to laugh at something. When Dean had asked what was so funny, Castiel had started to reply, but Sam had cut him off.

"Inside joke," his younger brother had teased, winking at Castiel.

It had been Sam that suggested the shooting lesson. Dean was surprised he hadn't thought of it himself.

"You don't need to worry about Lucifer, he's my problem. A gun may not kill all the things we'll face, but it may slow them down. Sometimes, that's all you need. Dad taught me that."

Castiel studied the collection of guns Dean had laid out on the duffle.

"As an angel, I have slain many demons with a sword."

The hunter laughed. "Cas, you don't even trust yourself with a razor! If I gave you a sword you could end up cutting your own head off!"

At first Castiel looked angry, but then he sighed and gave Dean a small smile. "You're probably right. Though I don't know that a gun would be much safer in my hands." He said.

Dean nodded. "Of course not. 'A gun in an untrained hand is worse than one in your enemy's hand'. Something else Dad used to say. That's why I'm training you. Just give it a chance, Cas. It won't be as bad as you think," He assured.

"Ok, I'll try," Castiel agreed.

Dean grinned at him and chose a gun. "Good. Now, this lovely girl is a Taurus Model 92 nine millimeter, standard with a ten round magazine." He explained, showing Cas how to load it and release the safety.

Dean showed Castiel how to put in ear plugs, and warned him that it would still be pretty loud. He fired three times, knocking off three cans. Castiel jumped each time he fired.

"Okay, Cas, now you try."

Castiel mimicked the way Dean had been standing and holding the gun. He took a breath and pulled the trigger.

Dean suppressed a laugh at the look of surprise on his face. Castiel had started out point the gun at the fence, but the force of the kick-back had him pointing the gun straight up.

"Good. Now you know what to expect." Dean then proceeded to show him how to stand, grip the gun and line up the target.

"Like this?" Castiel asked.

Dean stepped back and looked Castiel up and down from head to toe. The green, long sleeved t-shirt fit him snuggle, hinting at the lean muscle underneath. And the jeans… Castiel in blue jeans was one of the hottest things he'd ever seen. Dean moved forward to stand behind the former angel, lightly pressing his chest against Castiel's back. He placed a hand over Castiel's on the gun and one hand on the smaller man's shoulder. Castiel trembled slightly, and Dean felt a rush of warmth swept through him, and there was a tightening below his belt.

"Breathe in," He whispered, inhaling Castiel's scent deeply to demonstrate, allowing his nose to touch the other man's neck.

"D-Dean," Castiel stammered, his entire body shaking.

Dean ran his hand down Castiel's arm, and removed the gun from his hands. He quickly flipped the safety on and placed the gun back on the ground.

"Dean, what-" Castiel broke off with a sharp gas as Dean suddenly spun him around.

Dean pulled the smaller man flush against him, staring, transfixed into wide, innocent eyes, more blue than the clear Montana sky.

"This-this hug feels different," Castiel whispered, a pink tongue darting out to lick his dry lips. Dean groaned slightly at the sight.

"This hug is different," Dean told him, lowering his head and allowing their lips to touch.

Castiel stiffened and jerked his head back, eyes growing impossibly wider. Dean held on, refusing to drop Castiel's stunned gaze.

"I don't know…" Castiel trailed off, his eyes dropping to Dean's lips.

"Do you trust me, Cas?" Dean asked voice husky.

Castiel seemed to relax slightly at the question, and raised his eyes back to Dean's. "Of course I do," He said, smiling slightly as he tilted his head back to Dean for another kiss.

The hunter happily obliged the silent request and pressed his lips firmly against Castiel's. This time, Castiel raised his hands up to cup Dean's face and leaned into the kiss eagerly.

Dean ran the tip of his tongue along Castiel's lips.

"Open," He murmured, moaning with approval when Castiel obeyed.

It was so different from any kiss Dean had ever had before. The newness was refreshing. The last kiss he had was from a barmaid he'd known all of two hours before slipping into a back ally and taking her against a graffiti covered wall.

For him, up until this moment, kisses had always held a slight feeling of wrongness. It was a part of why he enjoyed them so much. He had always found the slight thrill that he was doing something bad and getting away with it to be exhilarating.

But kissing Castiel was nothing like that at all. There was absolutely nothing wrong about the way Castiel tasted, smelled, and felt. He tasted fresh, like the spring air after a thunderstorm. He smelled like freshly laundered clothes, and slightly like Sam's hair gel - like family.

Castiel dropped one hand to Dean's right arm, impatiently pushing up his sleeve and fitting his hand into his mark on the hunter's bicep. A reminder that though Dean was currently in a more dominant role, Castiel had claimed him first. His grip tightened.

Dean felt a rush that left him light headed, and feeling like he was floating. He felt like the only him holding him up was Castiel's hand on his arm. Dean pulled back with a gasp, startled to see that he and Cas were levitating almost three feet above the grass.

Castiel noticed at the same time Dean had, and soon they were both falling onto the ground. Dean groaned for an entirely different reason.

"And scene!" A sickeningly familiar voice called out with a snicker.

Dean was on his feet in an instant.

"What are you doing here?" He demanded angrily, trying to hide his fear. Surely it couldn't be time yet…

Zachariah held his hands up in am, 'I mean no harm' gesture, still smiling that oily smile. It made Dean want to punch him, angel or not.

"Calm down, boys. It's not show time yet," he assured them.

Dean tried not to let the angel see how relieved he was. Castiel remained silent, still on his knees from the fall and watching them with obvious terror in his eyes.

"If it's not time yet, why are you here? You promised no 'angel of Heaven' would bother us until it's time," Dean reminded, trying to gain the upper hand.

Zachariah shrugged. "I'm not here to bother you. Just to deliver a message," the angel said, looking around the car yard with distaste.

Dean, acutely aware of Castiel's fear, gritted his teeth against a smartass comment.

"I'm listening," he prompted.

Zachariah's gaze swept the yard again, and it occurred to Dean that the angel was looking for something. "Tell her that whatever she's planning, it won't work." He said finally.

Dean blinked. "What? Who?" he asked, confused.

Zachariah glared.

"Tell her that if she turns herself in, the Host will show her mercy. If we have to bring her in, and she can't hide forever, she will be destroyed."

"Anna escaped?" Castiel asked with a gasp.

"Like you didn't know," Zachariah said with a sniff, though he suddenly began to look slightly uncertain.

Dean grinned smugly. "Haven't seen her, but if I do I'll be sure to tell her how awesome she is for giving you the slip," he taunted.

The angel scowled. "I also came to tell you that the countdown has started. You have three days to prepare yourself, Dean. Better start saying your goodbyes. It's almost omelet time, and you can bet we will be cracking all of your eggs!" Zachariah laughed to himself, and turned a cruel gaze to Castiel.

"And one of your eggs will burn to ashes in the fire."

Castiel looked away.

"Three days, hero," the angel reminded Dean, and then disappeared in a whoosh of shadowed wings.

"Dick," the hunter muttered and then looked down at Castiel.

The former angel had silent tears rolling down his cheeks.

Dean reached down and pulled Castiel up into his arms, rubbing comforting circles on the smaller man's back.

Castiel sniffled and buried his face in the hunter's shirt. Dean swallowed; his throat was starting to burn as he held back his own tears.

"Shh, Cas it's gonna be okay. I promise. It doesn't matter what they do or where they send you. I'll walk into hell itself and pull you out, just like you pulled me out. I swear it," he whispered pressing a kiss to the smaller man's forehead.

Castiel pushed back with a huff. "Dean! I'm not going to hell!" he nearly shouted in exasperation.

Dean blinked.

"Of course you're not. I mean… You're not? Cause I'm pretty sure that's what Zach meant by that egg in the fire comment," he pointed out.

Castiel rolled his eyes. Dean had to hide a grin at the very human gesture.

"I told you, Dean. Zachariah is not God! Nor does he speak for Him. Hell is not for the faithful, and my faith has never been stronger," he insisted.

Dean just stared down at him, wanting to believe, but not daring to hope.

Castiel sighed and gave Dean a tired smile. "Angels do not know God's plan, but we know, I always knew, when I was following it. My being here with you right now is God's plan, Dean. I've never been more certain of anything."

Castiel stretched up and planted a sweet kiss on the hunter's lips. Dean pulled back shaking his head.

"Are you trying to tell me that God planned for us to be together? Like together, together? 'Cause from what I remember from the few Sunday school classes I had to attend when Pastor Jim was watching us, this is supposed to be a sin."

"Does it fell like a sin?" Castiel asked, tilting his head in question.

"No," Dean answered without hesitation and Castiel smiled.

"With every passing day, every new thing I learn or experience in this human existence I feel more and more like I have finally found where I belong. I'm no longer a warrior of God, but a true son of man. It's something I didn't even know that I wanted," Castiel held a hand up in front of his face, staring at it with a kind of awe.

Dean took the hand in his and placed a kiss on the palm.

"It's not a sin Dean. It's our destiny."

They shared another kiss.

"Then why were you crying?" Dean asked, suddenly remembering what started this surprisingly comfortable discussion.

Castiel blushed and looked down.

"It's silly. But when he mentioned Anna was free, I was afraid you might prefer to kiss her instead of me. It hurts to think about," he confessed.

"Oh," Dean said, surprised.

Castiel glanced up at him from underneath his lashes. "Would you? Prefer Anna to me?"

Dean pulled the former angel back into his arms and leaned in close enough for their noses to touch. "Anna who?"

&&&

It was nearly sunset by the time they made it back to the house. There had been no more shooting instruction, just sweet kisses, shy touches, and the joy of a new found love.

Dean was not at all surprised to see Anna watching them approach from Bobby's porch; he figured she would show up eventually. However, her appearance was a bit startling.

"Anna, trying out a new look?" He asked, reaching out to take Castiel's hand to reassure him.

Castiel gave his hand a squeeze and turned his gaze to his old superior.

Anna nodded toward them gravely. Her once pale, smooth face was now darker and lined.

Her dark red hair had turned mostly silver, shot through with stripes of pure white, and her dark blue eyes had changed into a translucent gold. She didn't 'look' like Anna anymore, but there was no mistaking that it was her.

"What happened?" Castiel asked her.

She just watched them quietly for a moment. When she finally spoke it was with a voice that was rough with age yet powerful and resonating.

"Dean Winchester. I once told you that only four angels had ever seen God's face. Now, there are five. It does not come without a price, but I now have the knowledge you need to stop Zachariah."

Dean was stunned. She had actually seen God?

"You saw Him?" Castiel demanded, gripping Dean's hand tighter.

Anna nodded.

"I fell once. I wanted to be human. I believed that being human meant being closer to

Him," she admitted.

"You were sure in for a rude awaking. Must have been disappointing to find out you were wrong," Dean commented

"I wasn't wrong, Dean. For me, it was God's will that I become human. But it was also His will that I not stay that way. I learned what I needed to learn. I appreciated it. And I grieved for my human life from the moment my Grace was renewed. I now know what it means to be human and what it means to be an angel. There are so few that can say that," she smiled at Castiel before continuing.

"And now that I have seen Him, I know that I am who I am supposed be. I am an Angel of the Lord, and I will continue as such until my time ends."

"Sorry," Dean mumbled, but she laughed.

"Don't be. I'm not." Her eyes turned to watch the setting sun and she repeated her earlier statement. "I have the knowledge you need to defeat Zachariah."

Dean sent Castiel a confused look, but the former angel just shrugged.

"I thought Lucifer was the one I was supposed to defeat."

Anna shook her head.

"The prophecy states that the one who begins it, is the only one who can stop it. But prophecies are tricky things, and are seldom to be taken at face value. Castiel, you were cast out of Heaven under the pretense that you had directly interfered with a prophet, but you see, Zachariah interfered first. He lost faith, and grew… bored. He gave the prophecy to the demon, Azazel. Dean that is why your father, and then you yourself were led to make those deals that sent you to hell."

Dean glared at her, feeling an old pain and resentment well up.

"So if it wasn't meant to happen, then why didn't God stop it, huh? Why did he leave me down there for so long! Why would he do that to me?"

Castiel put a comforting hand on his back, and Anna's gaze turned sympathetic. "God's first gift to the world was free will. It was your choices that led you to Hell, not His. And it was Castiel's choices that brought you back."

"I was ordered to pull him out of the pit," Castiel reminded her.

"So were all of the other angels in your garrison. And yet you were alone when the time came."

Dean was feeling a bit overwhelmed by this point. He'd had a long day, and his mind was still trying to wrap around the fact that Castiel was in love with him. All this 'God' talk was making his head hurt.

"Okay, look. This is all well and good, but you still haven't told me how to stop Zachariah," he complained.

Anna looked up suddenly, tilting her head as if listening to something. She nodded and with the sound of feathers in the wind she was suddenly standing right in front of Castiel.

With two fingers she touched his head, and the former angel gasped.

"What are you doing?" Dean demanded, pulling Castiel away from her.

"The knowledge is Castiel's now. He will explain, but I must go. Good luck, Dean."

&&&

"That's Bullshit Cas!" Dean yelled, and began pacing Bobby's living room.

Bobby and Sam were sitting on the couch watching as Castiel relayed the knowledge that Anna had given him.

Dean couldn't believe it. After everything they'd been through. It all fell to Sammy, again. His little brother, who he had gone to Hell for. Sam, who had been doing so well to break his addiction to the demonic blood.

Castiel had told them about a spell. One so old, it predated the written word. The spell itself was simple and straightforward. The problem was getting Lucifer to be still long enough for it to work. Sam could do it though. All he had to do was get juiced up on demon blood again, and he would be powerful enough to hold Lucifer long enough for the spell to take effect.

Sam didn't bat an eye before agreeing. He was so willing to do whatever it took to right what he felt was his wrong.

"And what exactly does the spell do?" Bobby asked before Dean could start ranting.

"The same thing it did the first time it was used. It will imprison Lucifer back in his cage. The world will go on as it has until it is time for the end," Castiel explained.

Sam stood up and faced Dean.

"I can do this Dean! You've got to let me," he pleaded.

Dean just shook his head wearily. "There has to be another way… The Prophecy! Cas, the prophecy says that I have to be the one to stop it, remember?"

Castiel looked at the floor.

"I was thinking about that… And it's true, Dean. I won't do the spell if you don't want me to. You are the one who ends it, by stepping back and letting us end it."

Dean paced and swore for a few more minutes before dropping tiredly into a chair.

"I hate prophecies."

&&&

The plan went so smoothly it could only be divine will. Dean and Bobby summoned Lucifer back into the convent where he had risen. Sam, stronger than ever, held him immobile and silent. Dean stood back and watched Castiel perform the spell. As he worked they were surrounded by the Host. A multitude of angels, led by Anna, gathered and watched as the first fallen angel was bound back into his prison.

When the lights dimmed and the dust settled only Bobby, Castiel, Sam, Dean and Anna remained.

Dean immediately ran over to Sam, who lay unconscious on the once more pristine stone floor of the chapel.

Dean cradled his brother in his arms, growing more fearful by the second as Sam was not breathing.

"No, please! Anna! What's wrong with Sam? Fix him," he demanded, not taking his eyes off his unnaturally still brother.

Anna walked over and gently pressed two fingers to Sam's forehead. The younger Winchester gasped and sat up panting.

Dean hugged him so hard his arms hurt.

"Dude, I- n-need to br-breathe," Sam protested.

"Sorry," Dean said, but he was grinning from ear to ear. Dean helped Sam stand up.

"Thanks, Anna," Sam said, sincerely. She nodded and turned to Dean, who thanked her as well.

Anna turned to Castiel with an eyebrow raised. "Need I even ask?"

Castiel looked at Dean with the brightest smile and shook his head.

"Hey, what happened to Zach? He's not gonna send some archangel after Cas, is he?" Dean asked her, only half joking.

Anna smiled wickedly. "Zachariah is undergoing… well, I believe you like to call it, 'bible camp'." She nodded to Bobby and then turned to leave. "Sam?" She asked over her shoulder. The younger Winchester just looked at her. "You have two days to decide. I suggest you don't waste time."

And then she was gone.

Bobby began to clean up, making sure that no clue remained as to what had happened in that place. Dean ruffled Sam's hair then walked over and swiftly kissed Castiel before going to help Bobby.

Sam raised his eyebrows at Castiel, who just shrugged, primly.

"So Cas, what was it that Anna was going to ask?" the younger Winchester wondered.

Castiel tilted his head.

"She was going to ask if I wanted my wings back. Like Anna herself, I am now who I was meant to be. Luckily, I didn't need to see God's face to figure that out. Just Dean's," Castiel said with a pleased smile.

Sam snorted and turned to leave, but Castiel stopped him. "And what did she mean when she said that you only have two days to decide?"

Sam sighed and looked away.

"She gave me the knowledge of an old spell too. You see, this will be the third time I detox from demon blood, and there is a pretty good chance I won't live through it this time," he admitted.

Castiel frowned eyes shifting to watch Dean who was happily cleaning up a chalk outline on the wall, out of earshot.

"The spell will erase what Azazel did. My blood will be completely cleansed of his, and nothing like this can happen to me again."

Castiel noticed the wary look on Sam's face.

"But there is a price?" He asked.

Sam nodded.

"Hey! C'mon you two! Let's hit the road," Dean called practically bouncing over to them and snagging Castiel around the waist. Bobby muttered something unflattering about Dean under his breath and carried a heavy black bag of supplies out to his truck.

"We just stopped the apocalypse! Beer and chicken wings are a must," he insisted pulling Castiel closer for a kiss.

Sam cleared throat and Dean looked at him over his shoulder.

"Cas's mine, Sammy. Go get your own angel," Dean taunted with a laugh.

Sam couldn't help but smile at how light-hearted his brother was. Dean hadn't laughed this much since before John had died.

Dean placed one more kiss on Castiel's cheek then dashed for the door. "Last one to the car has to pick up the tab!" He called and ran out into the sunshine.

Sam and Castiel were quiet for a moment.

"You have to tell him, Sam," Castiel said, quietly.

Sam shook his head.

"Not today, I don't."

End.

I'm Alive lyrics- Kenney Chesney

Feat - Dave Matthews

So damn easy to say that life's so hard
Everybody's got their share of battle scars
As for me I'd like to thank my lucky stars that
I'm alive and well

It'd be easy to add up all the pain
And all the dreams you've sat and watch go up in flames
Dwell on the wreckage as it smolders in the rain
But not me... I'm alive

And today you know that's good enough for me
Breathing in and out's a blessing can't you see
Today's the first day of the rest of my life
And I'm alive and well
I'm alive and well

Stars are dancin' on the water here tonight
It's good for the soul when there's not a soul in sight
This motor's caught its wind and brought me back to life
Now I'm alive and well

And today you know that's good enough for me
Breathing in and out's a blessing can't you see
Today's the first day of the rest of my life
Now I'm alive and well
Yeah I'm alive and well

A/N: Thanks so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. I have an idea for a sequel, but it will probably be a while before I write it. In the mean time, enjoy the new season of Supernatural! I know I will 

Take Care,

Alyce