Well here is the final chapter. I thought about and epilogue but decided to end it here. Thanks for those that left feedback and hope even if you didn't that you enjoyed the story. Hopefully I can get another one written soon. Thanks again.

Chapter Five-Christmas Day

Fraser woke with a start and was breathing quickly. He wiped the sweat from his forehead and slowed his breathing down. He found it hard to catch his breath and tried to sit up. He leaned over the bed but felt like he was suffocating. He struggled to lift his shirt then reached down and peeled off the tape holding the bandaging around his mid-section. He knew he shouldn't do it, but he just couldn't take a full breath with the tight bandaging. It came off, and he felt immediate relief and slightly more pain, but he could live with it. He stood unsteadily and moved toward the window, cracked it open, and breathed in deeply. He had no idea what time it was because there was no clock in the room, but he knew it was close to sunrise. He walked slowly to the closet. He figured he might as well get dressed for the day.

He put on a pair of jeans and a blue button up shirt. Getting his boots on was a little more difficult but once he managed, he quietly made his way to the washroom to shave and wash up. He slowly made his way down the stairs figuring it would be ridiculous to lie in bed fully dressed. He sat by the sad little tree and watched the lights. He felt tightness in his chest and throat. Maybe it had been a mistake to come down here. All he could remember was her here playing with Ray's nieces and nephews and decorating the little tree. He placed his head in his hand and focused on Sikes and the anger he felt. It was wrong to want the man dead but he did and in his grief he did not care if the man was evil or on some drug induced high when he did what he did. Fraser rubbed the top of his eyebrow and watched the lights shimmer. He made a note to remind Ray that lights should be turned off at night as they were a fire hazard.

Vecchio almost felt a panic when saw the window in Fraser's room open and rushed downstairs when he saw the Mountie asleep in the chair next to the Christmas tree. Vecchio's mother was in the kitchen making coffee. Vecchio gave her a kiss. "Merry Christmas Ma," he said with a smile.

"Merry Christmas Raymondo. Benny was asleep when I came down. I thought I would make coffee and a little breakfast and maybe he would wake up. Vecchio nodded as he helped his mother. It was tradition whether in Florida or in Chicago, that he helped her with breakfast on Christmas morning. Usually it was a bigger affair when the whole family was there. He had to admit that he enjoyed the laid back morning this year even though it was somber. This was far different than other Christmases.

They were setting the table when Fraser walked into the dining room. "Merry Christmas," he said quietly and with a smile.

"Merry Christmas Benny," Ray's mother said with a hug and a kiss on the Mountie's cheek. "Come on sit down for a little breakfast."

Vecchio shook his hand and gave him a pat on the back. "Merry Christmas Benny."

Fraser wasn't anymore hungry this morning as the other days but he would eat dutifully to please Ray's mother.

They finished and placed the dishes in the kitchen then went by the tree. The little tree that only she had the heart to pick out, Fraser thought as he bit the bottom of his lip.

Vecchio saw the torment on Fraser's face but only briefly then the calm covered the storm.

"Hey Frase. Just sit down…you too Ma. I'll get the gifts. There are only a couple. I brought yours from your apartment Benny."

"Thank you Ray," Fraser said trying to sound reasonably cheerful. He did not want to ruin the mood for them and he did not want to be here opening gifts. Christmas had always been a time for them to give thanks even if it was simple with few gifts. He was thankful for his friends, but the meaningless death of Rebecca was just such a dark hole in his heart.

Mrs. Vecchio tore open her gifts with a glee like a child that did make Fraser smile. "Oh Ray. This is so beautiful," she said raising up beautifully embroidered scarf, "How did you know I needed a new one."

"Because you have tried fixing that other one so much," Vecchio said.

She grinned broadly as she kissed Vecchio on the cheek. She then opened a simply wrapped package. She gasped when she pulled out a wooden nativity scene. "Oh my, Benton. Did you make this?"

"Yes ma'am. I was not sure…"

"Oh it is so beautiful. Just beautiful." She got up and smothered him in an embrace then finally a kiss on the cheek. Despite himself he blushed at the attention.

"Um, it really wasn't anything," he mumbled.

"Oh yes it is. Just beautiful," she said putting it on the mantle.

Vecchio opened his gift and smiled broadly. Inside was a wooden carving of a wolf. "A statue of Dief. This is really good Benny. Thanks a lot." Vecchio actually did like it and secretly envied Fraser's ability. "Open your gifts now."

"Oh yes, quite right." Fraser said. He opened the one from Vecchio's mother. He pulled out a pair of leather gloves lined with sheepskin and a thick wool scarf. "Thank you very kindly Mrs. Vecchio. These fit perfectly."

She grinned broadly and nodded satisfied. Vecchio handed Fraser another gift. "I know you really don't need much, but well, this is from me and Franny."

Fraser undid the ribbon and he could tell by the packaging that it was likely Francesca that had wrapped it. "Franny wrapped it," Vecchio chimed in and Fraser had to smile. Sometimes it was as if their minds were linked. Fraser opened the petite box and inside were two pairs of opera tickets.

"I think she is hoping you would take her but we know how much you love music and opera which of course adds to your weirdness."

"Ray," Fraser said. "I really don't know what to say. This is very generous of you. Perfect. Thank you very much."

Vecchio patted Fraser on the back. "I'm glad you like them Benny."

"Such wonderful gifts and mine were just…."

"From the heart," Vecchio said, "And to be honest if I could carve wood like you then I would have made you something too."

Fraser grinned. "Well can I help you with something?"

"No no Benny." Mrs. Vecchio said as she gathered the wrapping, "You and Ray watch the parade on T.V.," she said as she went to the kitchen. "Won't be much work since there are only the three of us."

Fraser smiled and stood slowly up from the chair. He winced slightly hoping that Vecchio had not noticed but he could feel the detective's eyes on him. "You okay Benny?"

"Yes Ray. I am fine thank you. I am going to go upstairs a moment then will be back down to join you and watch the parade."

Vecchio looked up from his T.V. guide. "Hey guess what. 'It's a Wonderful Life' is on too in about an hour. I know you love that show." Fraser smiled as he turned around from the staircase.

"Sounds good Ray. I'll be back in a minute."

Fraser slowly made his way up the stairs. He was warmed by the gifts he had received and the genuine thought put in them. It had taken him time to determine what he wanted to make for Mrs. Vecchio and Ray. He actually had made a little something for each of the family members. He knew that Americans purchased most of their gifts, as did most Canadians, but he had grown up in places with no shopping malls and people tried to make gifts that said as much about the giver as the receiver.

He set down the tickets, scarf and glove on the dresser then went and sat by the window for a while. Being down stairs in front of that tree was harder than he thought. He would have to put on a good face for the Vecchios. He let the cool air hit him on the face and felt himself relax. Christmas will be over soon he thought as he got up to go back downstairs. He wondered why his father had not yet appeared as he made his way slowly down the stairs. He sat quietly in the soft chair next to Vecchio and watched the rest of the parade followed by 'It's a Wonderful Life.' He and Ray did not speak through most of it except for small talk.

Vecchio watched Fraser sit there staring at the television. It was a vacant uninterested look. Despite Fraser's efforts the Mountie could not pretend to be interested. To be honest, Vecchio wasn't much interested either but they couldn't just lie in bed all day on Christmas. "A Christmas Story" was on after that and for a moment Fraser actually laughed when the one boy got his tongue stuck to a pole. Fraser told Vecchio a story about someone he knew who had something similar happen. For a moment the twinkle had returned to his friend's eye but then it was gone and replaced with an imperceptible look.

"Dinner smells good," Vecchio said finally.

"Yes. Yes it does." Fraser answered with a slight smile. "Your mother really should not have gone to this trouble."

"Believe me Benny. This is no trouble for her. She loves to do this stuff and it's only the three of us this time. She bakes a mean chocolate cake from scratch.

"Mmmmhhmm,. I can smell it."

"You hungry?" Vecchio asked looking toward the kitchen.

"Yes a little bit."

The doorbell rang and Fraser and Vecchio turned to face each other. "Dief," Fraser said simply.

"Yup," Vecchio said as he got up, "I'll get it."

Fraser watched him walk toward the door. "Hi Elaine," he heard Vecchio say. Just a second or two later Diefenbaker was licking Fraser's face.

"Hey boy," Fraser said with a smile. "I missed you too." The dog whimpered and sniffed Fraser's hand, face, and ribs.

"Don't worry Dief. I'm fine. Really." The dog yawned then snorted. Fraser drew the wolf closer to his face as he patted him. "Yeah. I know I can't keep anything from you."

"Hi Fraser," Elaine said walking in. She had brought three small parcels and put them under the tree, "Merry Christmas."

Fraser stood up. "Merry Christmas Elaine." She touched his arm and looked up at him full of concern.

"Thanks for taking care of Deifenbaker Elaine."

"It's okay Fraser. I really have enjoyed having him around. He has missed you though." She studied his face a moment. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine, thank you. Better under the care of the Vecchios," Fraser said aware that she had taken his hand in hers, but he did not pull away.

She smiled. "Well I'm glad Benton. I was worried."

He nodded with a slight smile of appreciation. He was not sure what else to say when Mrs. Vecchio came into the room with Ray behind her. "Won't you stay for dinner with us Elaine," Mrs. Vecchio said as she began setting the dinning room table.

"Oh no," Elaine said, "I don't want to barge in."

"Don't be ridiculous. We have plenty of food, unless you have other plans."

"No I don't, but well are you sure?" she said with hesitation.

"Of course," Vecchio said. She looked back at Fraser and realized she still had his hand in hers and let go.

"Mrs. Vecchio cooks exceptionally well, Elaine. I wouldn't say no," Fraser said moving toward the dining table. She laughed as Diefenbaker bounded after him. She moved toward the table and sat down without saying another word.

Fraser made every effort to look interested in dinner and keep up with the conversation. It was actually a pleasant meal and conversation and years of practice allowed him to push any unpleasant thoughts far away for a short time. After coffee and cake they spoke just a little longer before Elaine said good-bye.

Mrs. Vecchio busied herself with cleaning with the usual insistence that she do it alone. Vecchio and Fraser went and sat by the tree again. "Hey look Benny, we forgot about Elaine's gifts."

Fraser looked up from petting Diefenbaker. "That was very kind of her."

"Yeah it was. Here's yours." Vecchio handed a small package to Fraser.

"Hey look at this. It's a perfect model of my baby!" Vecchio said holding up a box of a model car. "Hey it even has the paint. That's cool. What did you get?"

Fraser opened the small box. "Ah, 'The Complete Works of Shakespeare.' That was very thoughtful indeed. I had mentioned that I had lost my copy on a trek through the Yukon last vacation."

"You go trekking on vacation and read Shakespeare?"

"Yes Ray."

Vecchio rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Well I'm tired Benny. I'm going to bed. Do you need anything else?"

"No no. I will be back up soon. I am doing better."

"Okay well Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas Ray."

Fraser listened to Vecchio go up the stairs. Finally he was alone. He no longer had to try to act like he was unaffected. Of course they were all affected to some degree or another, and he knew he couldn't completely fool Ray, but he didn't want to ruin Christmas just as he knew Ray had put on a show of his own.

Fraser closed his eyes. Maybe time would heal wounds, but Fraser wasn't sure this time. He would prefer to feel the physical pain in his side than the heaviness in his heart that just would not lift.

I should have just left her alone. Ray was right. I should just stop trying to help people, smother them with kindness then they end up dead. They end up dead. He rested his head on his hand. He felt the anger rise inside of him. He had the urge to throw the tree through the window, to break something anything, but he sat there with his eyes closed thinking how he had failed.

"Are you going to open my gift Benton?"

Fraser's head snapped up and he nearly jumped out of his seat. He looked wide- eyed into the face of Rebecca. "I uh, uh…I must…uh...be dreaming."

"No son," his father's quiet voice said from behind him. Fraser looked back. "Dad, I…uh Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas son. Sorry I couldn't get here sooner. I was a bit tied up looking for your present," the elder Fraser said with a nod toward the little girl standing next to the tree.

"I made it just for you Benton," she said as she approached him.

He just looked at her. She smiled at him sadly. "It was not your fault Benton. I know you blame yourself. You shouldn't blame yourself."

"I…it was my duty to protect you."

"No it was not Benton. It was not your duty to protect me."

"I should have just left you alone Rebecca. I should have…"

"Left me to my sad little life? You made my life happy Benton."

He looked away. "It was because of me that you died Rebecca. Sikes aimed to kill me."

"And I was meant to save you. I dreamt of it many times." She stood in front of him and he looked at her again. His eyes had watered slightly though he willed them to dry.

"I don't understand…you are a child Rebecca. An innocent child who did not deserve the life that you had."

She smiled. "There are so many like me Benton, and you cannot save them all. You know that…you knew that, but in your heart you know you can make a difference. You made a difference in my life, gave me something to hope for, to admire. I knew that you cared for me like you care so much for so many. It would make me sad to think that you would lose that because of me. There are so many others that need you."

He stood up and began to pace. She spoke beyond her years. His side hurt, his head hurt and as it had since that day his heart hurt. "Benton, I am so much happier here. You just don't know how wonderful it is to be here. Now I can watch over you and others all the time. It was what I was meant to do."

Despite his efforts, he felt tears run down his cheeks. He tried to blink them to stop but they didn't. "You are…okay?" It seemed like a stupid question, but he didn't know how else to ask it.

She stepped in front of him so that he came to a halt. "I am so okay Benton. More than okay, but I'll be sad if you are sad because of me."

He sat down and she stood next to him. "Now will you open my gift?" She extended her arm to hand him a scroll.

He looked at it then at her. She was smiling. "I couldn't buy you anything you know, so I made this for you. I left it here that day we decorated the tree. Ray said you would be coming here for Christmas dinner."

He wiped the tears then began to unroll it. He half smiled half sobbed when he saw a picture of himself running apparently after a suspect. His name was scrawled next to it with an arrow pointing to the red coated figure. Above it was an angel with a similar arrow pointing to it with the name "Rebecca." He pulled the paper close to his chest and could not hold back his tears.

Vecchio watched from the stairs. He had heard Fraser talking so came down to check on him. He stopped when he saw Fraser opening the small scroll. He had known Rebecca had put it under the tree, but had forgotten it was there. Vecchio did not know what to do. Superman did have tears. Vecchio fought back is own, not sure if they were for seeing his friend in pain or for the own loss he felt of the little girl.

"Son let it out. Don't hold it in like I did when your mother died. It nearly ate me alive," Robert Fraser told his son as he placed a hand on Fraser and squeezed. He wanted his son to feel his presence literally. Bob Fraser looked at the little girl and nodded. She smiled as she approached Fraser and wrapped her arms around him.

"I'm sorry Benton. Please don't be sad, please." Fraser looked at her but she was blurry because of the tears. He suddenly felt claustrophobic. He stood up quickly and hissed as he grabbed his side but he ignored it as he rushed out the front door and started running.

"Oh crap," Vecchio said. He was thankful he had left boots by the door. He thrust his feet in them and ran after the Mountie.

Fraser was already halfway down the street by the time Vecchio had picked up speed. "Benny wait…….Stop Fraser!"

oOoOo

Rebecca held Bob Fraser's hand tightly. "Did I make it worse?"

"No my dear. He will be alright. He just well, he just needed some air. He will be fine, just wait and see. The Yank will take care of the rest."

oOoOo

Fraser's lungs were burning and his side was screaming at him. He reached the end of the block and collapsed in the snow near the stop sign. He grabbed a branch that had fallen in the wind. With a grunt he stood and used it to swing at the stop sign over and over.

Vecchio stopped a couple of yards away amazed. He approached Fraser slowly. "Benny," he said calmly, "It's okay…" Fraser ignored him and kept swinging until Vecchio wrapped his arms around Fraser's arms. The Mountie was breathing heavy and there was a slight whistle in his breath. "Benny, it's okay."

Vecchio steadied his friend as Fraser sunk to his knees. He could feel Fraser shaking and occasionally catch his breath. Vecchio realized Fraser was still crying. Vecchio sat there unable to hold back his own tears. "We'll get through this Benny. We will."

After a few minutes Fraser sat up on his knees. His eyes were red but dry. He swallowed hard. "She came to me, by the Christmas tree."

Vecchio wiped his eyes and looked at his friend. "She told me," Fraser continued, "that she could watch over me." He swallowed hard. "That bullet was meant for me Ray. It should have been me. It should have been me."

Vecchio would have felt the same. What would Fraser tell him? "I know Benny, but maybe it wasn't. We can't understand why….you know that don't you."

Fraser pulled the small scroll out of his shirt and handed it to Ray. "She made this for me before it even happened."

Vecchio looked at it and felt the lump in his throat. He handed it back to Fraser. "She's watching over you now."

Fraser looked past Vecchio's shoulder and saw Rebecca with his father. He smiled at her. "Yes, she is."

Vecchio grabbed Fraser's arm. "Come on before you get sick. You have to see the doctor tomorrow. I don't think we should tell him about your little exercise."

"No probably not."

"You still outran me even with cracked ribs."

"We shouldn't tell anyone that either?"

"No we shouldn't."

Superman did have tears but he would heal. Vecchio was sure of that now and he would heal with him.

The End