Well, I kinda liked my first attempt at a TMOHS/YGO crossover, but I found a way to improve on the concept: Rewrite the entire series in a fashion fitting Yu-Gi-Oh fanfics, but still retaining the essence of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. Without further ado, I present to you, Ha-Ru-Hi! (The Revised Series)
Duel 1: Haruhi Suzumiya comes to Town.
Five years after the introduction of the Duel Monsters Trading Card Game, it rose to international stardom as being the most popular game ever created. Everyone was into it, young kids, teens, adults, EVERYBODY.
I dueled as well, but not as well as some people. By the way, the name's-
"KYON!"
AUGH!!
Taken by surprise, in my new classroom.
"Kyon, why don't you stand up and introduce yourself?" asked Mr. Okabe.
My eyebrow twitched in slight annoyance at the stupid nickname. How my little sister had somehow spread it around the world was beyond my understanding. Everyone called me Kyon, my parents, my friends, AND my teachers.
I figured arguing the point would do me no good, so I stood and smiled, hoping to make a good first impression, "Hello everyone, there's really not much to say. My father moved here with his career, and I ended up coming to this school. I hope I can get along with everyone and we can have a good school year."
"Thank you, Kyon."
Sighing, I sat down, as a girl about my age, with short, dark-brown hair and an orange ribbon stood up behind me.
"I'm Haruhi Suzumiya." the Girl began, "I came to this city looking for answers to questions that had yet to be answered. Questions involving Card Games, time travelers, aliens, ESPers, and interdimensional sliders. If you have anything related to these topics, say them now, because I don't care for anything else. Thank you."
Sitting back down again, she began looking through a deck of Duel Monster Cards, as if curious about their origins.
Now I should take this moment to pause and clarify, I had heard rumors of Suzumiya-san around the school, but this little spout of insanity still surprised the crap out of me. Who did this girl think she was? Dr. Who?
The teacher was baffled, he didn't know what to say.
"Uh... thank you, Haruhi. Next..."
A short time passed before I decided to talk to Suzumiya-san. I didn't know that to expect, but what the heck.
"So that was a joke right? That whole thing with ESPers and time travelers and stuff? My name's Kyon."
Great, now I was even introducing myself with that dumb nickname.
It seemed my attempt to capture her attention was not to end in failure. Her arms uncrossed and she smirked, "Well, would you happen to know anything about that stuff?" she asked, getting slightly excited.
"I wouldn't say that I've ever seen any proof on the matter," I said, not quite agreeing or disagreeing with her, "But it is an interesting subject I suppose."
People around the class were giving me strange looks, some shaking their heads in dissapointment, I rolled my eyes, ignoring them and plowing on, "But suppose they did exist," I continued, "It would be a one in a million chance of finding them. There are billions upon billions of people that live on this planet, and something like an esper or an alien would be an extremely uncommon thing. How would you go about locating one, especially since they'd most likely want to remain hidden?"
Haruhi frowned at this and rubbed her chin, looking thoughtful for a moment.
If she wasn't so crazy, I'd probably ask her out on a date.
"You raise a good point," she conceded, but then her determined glare returned, "However, it is my mission to seek the answers out. Normal life, normal friends, I'm not meant for it. And these cards," she pointed toward her deck, "are the key to finding these answers."
"A deck of Duel Monster cards?" I asked, "THAT I know about."
"Really?"
"Yep, I happen to have a deck as well. Most everyone does."
"Oh. So these cards are owned by everyone?"
"Some are. There are some cards that aren't produced as often. These are called, 'Rare' cards, and thus have higher value," I explained.
"Oh..." Haruhi then picked a card from her deck and put it on her desk. "Is this one of them?"
"Well..." I took a look, and recognized it, "... yes. It's very rare. Only three are known to exist... How'd you get this card?"
"This deck was my father's, before his disappearance." Haruhi explained. "I could conclude that this card was his rarest. So, I guess, Everyone would be after Blue-Eyes White Dragon here."
Everyone immediately heard the name of the card, and turned to us, shock on their faces.
"Buh...Blue-Eyes?"
"No way!"
"Doesn't Seto Kaiba have all three of them?"
"It could be a Fake!"
"True that."
"Someone check it out!"
A student looked over my shoulder and yelled, "This is rarer then the True Blue-Eyes! It's Blue-Eyes White Dragon, Envoy of the Light!"
"STUDENTS! To your seats!" Obake intervened just in the nick of time. God, thank you, Sensei.
It was later in the day when I would hold a conversation with my two friends on the roof, Taniguchi and Kunikida.
"I heard she's a total weirdo," whispered Taniguchi, brow furrowing, almost as if he was concentrating on something.
I laughed lightly, "This coming from someone like you?"
Taniguchi pouted, "I'm serious Kyon. Apparantly, the last school she went to, a cool guy, which every girl loved, asked her out, and she totally dumped him five days later."
I rolled my eyes, "That's normal, happens all the time."
Kunikida interrupted, "Apparantly, she hasn't had a relationship that has lasted more than a week."
"So he's a jerk," I said with a shrug, "Big deal, there's tons of them."
Taniguchi and Kunikida looked at each other, both frowning. "It's not normal, Kyon, when she dumped him, she was always shouting about how she didn't have time for normal humans."
I frowned, then why in the world was she talking to me?
I looked to the right, down below at the baseball field at the side of the school, and I caught sight of Haruhi, scaling the large fence at the end of the field with what looked like a radio on his back, what the hell was she doing? It makes sense that guys would try to date her. She was quite the looker, but her personality ruined her completely.
Yet something was driving me to hold conversation with her.
Taniguchi interupted my thoughts, "So how do you do it?"
I looked at my friend and raised an eyebrow, "How do I do what?"
"Don't play dumb with me, I saw the smirks she tossed at you when you two were talking in class, it's getting ridiculous. She must think you're an alien or something because all you had to do was bat your eyes and explain a game to her. She was staring at you for the rest of the period!"
I frowned, I wouldn't go so far as staring.
"Well she was!" shouted Taniguchi.
"I'm just talking to her," I said with a shrug, "It's not like I do anything special."
"Uh huh, I'm onto you, Kyon."
I frowned, "What is your malfunction, Tani-kun?"
"I told you not to call me that!!"
"Pass down the basket and draw your new seat assignments."
I took the basket in my hand and rushed to draw the little piece of paper out. I smirked when I realized my new seat was by the window, the second to last seat in the back of the class. I couldn't help but breathe a small sigh of relief.
Good bye forever Haruhi.
A few minutes later saw me with my face buried in my arms.
This had to be some kind of weird twist of fate.
Some cosmic coincidence.
The smirking deck-holder was still in the seat behind me, "So Kyon," she said, "What do you really think about the whole thing?"
I raised my head up and sighed, "What whole thing?"
"About me being crazy. I know the rumors being tossed around about me, and it doesn't surprise me one bit."
I had to admit, she had a certain kind of charm about her.
I mentally slapped myself, get a hold of yourself, man!
"Well..." I paused, "All great people in history were different from the norm, Albert Einstien, Da Vinci, Steven Hawking. They all revolutionized the world in thier own way because they were 'strange'. However, they also had something else, they were geniuses. Normal High school kids like us should just worry about trying to pass and get through our lives." I turned my body slightly to look at Haruhi again, and her smirk had disappeared. She was now glaring out the window. What did I do to piss her off?
SIGH.
Well, I'd better start ignoring her.
...Was something tugging the back of my shirt.
Something was DEFINITELY tugging my collar.
AUGH!!
That something hit my head on Haruhi's desk. Recovering, I turned and narrowed my eyes. It seemed to have no effect, "That's it!"
"What's it?"
"If the answers I need won't come to me, then I'll go looking for them!"
I blushed when I realized the whole class was staring. Before I hadn't cared much, but now it was just plain embarrasing. "Suzumiya-san, maybe you should calm down a little."
"No!" she shouted, "It's so simple I can't believe I didn't realize it before." She loomed over me, "Come with me, Kyon!"
"Wha..."
Before I had realized what was happening, I felt a gust of air rush through my hair, and Haruhi was running out of the classroom with me in tow.
"STOP! ARE YOU MAD!? CLASS DIDN'T EVEN END YET!"
It appeared that she did not hear me, or was just plain ignoring me. A huge grin was plastered on her face as she dashed me through the halls to God knows where.
The fact that I had ended up with this troublesome girl was more than enough for me to handle. Whatever deity that lived in the sky must have suddenly decided, 'Hey, that dude looks like he has a boring life, let's spice it up a little.'
I LIKED my boring life thank you very much, and I wanted it back.
These inner monologues of mine really need to stop, I have a seriously bad habit of talking to myself.
I opened my mouth to shout another complaint, but it appeared stopped. "Okay," she said, still with that goofy grin.
I looked at my surroundings, it appeared we had stopped in the stairwell, "And where are we exactly?" I asked.
"This is where I go to think."
"The stairwell?"
"That's beside the point. I'm going to make a club!"
"A club?"
"Yeah, and it'll be dedicated to finding the answers I need, which, as stated before, included things like aliens, espers, and time travelers. We need to get a clubroom."
A small protest rose in my throat. We? Since when had this involved the word we? Last time I checked I wasn't about to take part in the crazy schemes going through this girl's head, yet here I was...
In the stairwell...
My protest suddenly died, "Just do whatever you want," I grumbled, bringing a hand to my face.
MEANWHILE...
"The Light Envoy has been located."
"Excellent. Soon, the other Envoys will reveal themselves."
"Yes, of course. And what of the Humanoid Interfaces stationed in that area?"
"They'll not interfere. I KNOW the Integrated Thought Entity, and it will not take interest until drastic events are caused..."
"What is this 'Drastic' you speak of?"
"... Idiot. You just ruined the mood."
BACK AT NORTH HIGH, KYON'S POV
I tried to resist... I really did...
The fact that I was standing in the middle of the deserted literary club in no way meant that I was appeasing Haruhi's crazy antics. In fact, I was totally against them.
It all started a couple of days ago.
When I had foolishly spoken to the Duelist known as Haruhi Suzumiya.
"The literary club was going to be shut down if no one joined," she explained to me, opening the door to a very blank room. In the center of the room sat a long table with a single chair, in that chair sat a lavender haired girl about our age with glasses, flipping through the book in her hands quietly, "She was the one that joined."
"Yuki Nagato," said the girl quietly.
"And he's okay with this?"I asked sceptically.
"It's fine," said Yuki.
"But are you sure about this? You'll probably get booted out."
"Yes. But I'm willing to risk it."
I sighed heavily, obviously my last ditch effort had not succeeded in detering Haruhi's will. "Then it's decided!" she shouted, "This will be our club room, hold on a second, I'll be right back!"
She disappeared as quickly as we had entered, and not but a minute later she dragged in a very cute and very frightened looking red haired girl, "This will be our mascot!" she shouted joyfully, "I always go through the building on lunch breaks to find cute girls that happen to be Duelist, and you just can't get any cuter than this!"
If you were a guy, you'd have a very sick mind, Haruhi Suzumiya.
"I don't know what's going on," said the girl timidly, looking around the room in fright. Her eyes landed on Nagato-san, and some of the fright vanished, "Oh, I see. Okay, then, I'll join your club." She spoke so quietly it was hard to hear what she said, and I instantly felt sorry for her, "I'm Asahina Mikuru."
"You are one sick girl Suzumiya!" I shouted, "First, you get me involved in your escapades, and now her! Are you some sort of bisexual rapist or something?!"
She smirked and chuckled, as if I had made a joke, "She's not the only thing I've got. I've decided on a name for this club!"
Oh no.
Attention world!
The name for the secret club borrowing the literary room is about to be revealed!
"SOS Brigade!"
My stomach did a backflip, "S... O... S?"
"Save the World by Overloading it with Fun Suzumiya Haruhi's Brigade."
Please tell me she was joking.
Please tell me I would wake up any minute now to my little sister bouncing on my back.
My first week at high school, and my life had already been ruined.
Why did she drag me into this?
Dammit I've gotta stop this inner monologue.
Next Chapter: Revelations! and the First Duel!