DISCLAIMER: I own nothing and no one from Spiderman. I am just a poor college student who also happens to be a Spidy fan and this just happens to be a fanfiction that my mind came up with that I feel like sharing with other fans. I make absolutely NO money from this. It is merely for fun and hopefully the enjoyment of other fans. Please don't sue and fans please enjoy.

Author Note: I would like to just quickly mention that I haven't seen/read a lot of spidy stuff recently… like in the past year… two years… something like that… anyway if I totally mess something up here, I'm really sorry… But I don't think I did… I hope I didn't… anyway I hope you enjoy…

Separate Note: To any Spidy lovers I would really recommend the novel "Spider-man: The Darkest Hours" by Jim Butcher. I think it is really excellent. Quite possible one of my favorite Spidy stories. Plus I simply love the way Butcher writes :)

Chapter 16: The Reason

Finally everyone was gather together in the kitchen. Robby pulled the pans of food out from the oven where he had put them to keep them warm and after that breakfast was like a mini buffet.

Peter and MJ were still a bit bashful around each other, lightly blushing every time their eyes met, but the promise of food had them both up and in line together.

At the table, Jameson tried to engage Peter into a conversation and Peter tried to accommodate, but found talking through a mouthful of eggs can be difficult.

"Oh Jameson," Robbie said joining the others at the table with his own plate of food. "Let the boy eat in peace."

The editor grumbled something under his breath and stabbed a sausage with his fork, but didn't push any further.

"Sorry." Peter murmured sheepishly, but really not that 'sorrily' for he was hungry. Really hungry. Truthfully he hadn't noticed how hungry he was until he had finally left the bedroom. Then the smells of food had hit his senses and he all but drooled at the thought.

A bit later after the eating was mostly done and Peter had finished his sixth plate, the talks finally began. It took a moment for Jameson to get his thoughts together. Simply put the editor couldn't remember a time he had seen so much food disappear into one person outside an eating contest and especially into such a skinny, kind of 'small' person at that. Really Peter couldn't have been much taller then five-two or three. Not exactly what you would have expected from someone who had 'extra' abilities. Although, from what he had seen, Jamison had to admit the boy did have more muscles on him then the old newshound had expected to see such a lean frame. Really watching Peter these past few hours, the boy seemed like just a normal teenager. Well maybe not totally 'normal,' the editor reflected thinking of the time Peter had jumped out of the window. But also definitely not what I was expecting for the person behind the mask.

Jameson decided to delve right into the many issues that surrounded the Spiderman persona. First of all of which was Peter's age.

"Peter," the editor said seriously, catching the teenagers attention. "You're too young to be doing this." Jameson gave a wave of his hand as if it explained everything and even though his words were vague, everyone knew what he was talking about, but the newsman wasn't done yet. "You should be enjoying your final years of childhood like a proper teenager not gallivanting around rooftops doing this 'Spiderman' thing."

"Mmmm," Peter mumbled mildly, nibbling on his last piece of bacon, his tone neither agreeing nor disagreeing with Jameson's statement.

Jameson gave the boy a hard look from where he sat. "You don't seem to surprise by my little speech." And I spent so much time trying to figure out what to say, the editor's mind added silently to himself.

"Oh sorry…" Peter said looking up. "It's just… that's what DareDevil keeps telling me. And Fury. And a bunch of other people…" The teenager sighed before looking back up into Jameson's eyes. "The whole 'you're a kid/live your life' speech kinda lost its effect about two years ago."

Jameson was stunned once again. He thought he would have gotten used to it by now, but Peter was really starting to become one surprise after another. What did these so called 'super peoples' do on there off time? Sit around and talk? It was still hard for the editor to think of any of them having 'normal lives' but Peter was obviously an example. Going to school. Having a job. Doing homework. But even though he was surprised, Jameson wouldn't be deterred from what he was saying. "Peter this really is not life for a kid your age.

"Hey," Peter said just a bit defensively. "Technically I can drive now… if I had a car… but that's not the point. The point is that in a few more years I'll legally be an adult."

"Which is exactly why you should – "

"Jameson…" the boy who was Spiderman sighed, his head resting on a hand. "Let me ask you a simple question: if not me then who? Who else would be able to do or simply would do the things I am doing? Despite what you obviously think from your editorials and what you say, there is no glory in this… Okay maybe a little, but more often then not I get shot at rather then applauded." Jameson winced at that and he felt Robbie beside him also tense at the words. It bothered both the men immensely to think of a kid getting shot at and even more so when it was someone they knew. Peter saw the subtle change come over the two men and felt a bit sorry, but bluntly he was too tired to sugarcoat what he was saying. Now that the teenager had been fed, there was nothing he would have liked better then to go curl up somewhere and fall asleep again, but he knew he couldn't. Not yet anyways. It simply wouldn't have been fair. Well, he thought a little drearily, they wanted the truth and now they're going to get it. Raw and unadulterated from the horses mouth. Peter mentally sighed and sat a bit straighter, trying not to outwardly give away how exhausted he really was.

"I know you were expecting some demented psychopath behind the mask probably with some sort tortured childhood with an abusive mother and a drunk father or something…" Peter shrugged. "Sorry, but all you got was me…"

Silence suffused the room as everyone thought about what had just been said. There was much insight in Peter's words… and maybe a little more truth then even Jameson wanted to admit to himself.

"So exactly why do you… do what you do?" The editor finally asked.

Peter looked away thinking. "It's… complicated." He said after awhile. "It's… Oh boy how do I explain this without sounding totally crazy?" Peter chewed his lip as he mused over the problem. "It's because I can… I know that sound lame," the teenager added quickly. "But knowing I can do something that could ultimately save someone else's life makes me feel responsible to or, I guess you could even say, for them… if that makes any sense at all." Peter rubbed his brow trying to figure out the best way to explain everything.

"It – I think it at least partially comes from something my uncle told me before he died. He said that 'with great power comes great responsibility' and I believe that. I know it sounds crazy but think of it like this: if someone is choking to death and you know the Heimlichmaneuver and you also know no one else in the crowd does, would you stand there and do nothing? I have the ability-the power to save people no one else can and so I do…Boy now I just sound conceded." Peter looked up at his audience and give then maybe just a bit of a tired smile. "You know there isn't really an ideal way to explain all this per say."

Even Robbie was speechless at that and he was the one mostly on the 'for Spidy' side of the issue, but what Peter had said about his reasons… That was pretty spectacular. And, to top it all off, it even had pretty sound logic behind it… Really if you thought about it in those simpler terms it made practically perfect sense.

"Of course there are some other reasons," Peter continued to say after a moment of thought. "But I'm afraid those are private. Lets just leave it at I'm sick of seeing people die." It was obvious to all present the kid was avoiding the topic of his family. Which under the circumstances was understandable.

"So have you ever killed anyone?" The words were out of Jamison's mouth before the editor really realized what he was saying. He could have kicked himself for entering into such a delicate topic with such callousness, but what was done was done. Now he just held his breath, dreading what the answer might be.

Peter frowned at the editor, his eyes cold. "That's a dark question. Are you sure you really want to know?"

The teenager looked intense then, scary. Jameson felt a little bubble of fear rise in him, but he wouldn't back down. It wasn't so much that Peter's physical appearance had changed, the editor realized, but rather the feel in the air around him had. The teenager felt powerful… maybe even dangerous, but then the moment past and Peter was just a teenager again.

"No," the kid said looking away from the editor and down at his plate. "I've never killed."

There was silence in the room for a while then Peter spoke again. "I almost have," he said in a soft voice barely above a whisper and then he looked up, his hazel eyes directly meeting Jameson's own. "And the thought of it scares the shit out of me."

The words forceful and at that moment the kids eyes were so filled with a fear that Jamison couldn't imagine all that they had seen.

Peter suddenly slouched back in his chair, breaking eye contact with the editor. He couldn't believe he was going to tell them all this… Even M.J. didn't know some of this stuff, but well… here it goes. "You let go…" he started in an overly calm voice, struggling to find the right word to describe what he was trying to say. "You go too far and… bad stuff start to happen. I've heard of it happening before. Someone with… powers take things too far and then they start to think they have the power to take things into their own hands. And-and things happen and suddenly they find themselves with blood on their hands and hitting for the other team." Halfway through the speech Peter had to put his hands under the table so the others couldn't see they where shaking slightly. Why am I telling them all this? he wondered staring at his trembling hands. Maybe, he decided, maybe it's because I need to tell someone. Soon... just to have someone else know...

A gentle hand came to rest on his shoulder and Peter started in surprise. He looked up to find MJ standing beside him, looking down at him with kind understanding. He smiled up at her and closed his eyes, resting a hand over her's.

He sighed and looked back at the two news hound on the other side of the table. They were both looking at him in a strange way. It was a look that he had never before seen on either of their faces and he didn't really know what to make of it, but, he reasoned, if anything I've already dug my grave. Anything else I say can't hurt more then it already has.

"It's a very fine line to walk, between what's right and wrong, at least in this situation. There is no real black and white, just a bunch of grey that come in various shades of light and dark. Really you have to have some principles to stay sane doing it. One of the most common rules I find that people use is what I think of as the 'no kill rule' which basically boils down to no killing ever." Peter grew quite then as dark memories of the past resurfaced. "I-I have seen people die before. One was an enemy. He was killed violently, really upclose and personal and… and the sight of it almost destroyed me…" He looked up tiredly at the two sets of eyes that were still staring at him. "It's so different from what people see in movies and whatnot and… I find it scary that some would… rejoice in another's death…" A sad kind of look crossed Peter's face. "Bet they wouldn't think the same way if they where there in person… Sorry," he said suddenly, a faint smile spread upon his lips as if he was trying to reassure his audience who seemed to be in shock. "This is getting depressing. Would you mind if we changed the subject?"

TBC…

Well here we are in the first chapter of 'the talks.' I REALLY hope I didn't totally mess up… I can't remember the last time I was so anxious about the upload of a chapter. Eeek… I really need to apologies for how long it's been since my last chapter. I've been having computer troubles and after that busy school troubles… so yah… Please review. I really would like to see what people think… but please no flames… if you have criticism that's fine but a review that simply says something like "I hate it" isn't very helpful. Lastly thanks a bunch for sticking this out with me and I really, really hope you enjoyed. I would really like to write some more today but I really need to start in on my homework… ugh…

Battosailover5: Um I really don't know what you mean by "spice the story up a bit…" sorry if the story's falling short of your expectations but I'm doing the best I can…

CGreene: Sorry the weird 3 link thingy was my fault. I kept getting cold feet when uploading the chapter because I was doing a lot of the writing at school between classes so I was crunched for time and every time I uploaded I ended up taking it down again thinking I could make the chapter better later that afternoon/night if I spent some more quality time with it… sorry… my bad… I'll try really hard not to do it again… and with the cliff hangers… really I don't know any other way to write… plus I want to keep you guys coming back for more you know? I just love having you guys around. I don't want to loose you;)

Brightfire15: I am so happy that you are enjoying my writings… I really hope you will continue to do so… Please please… I really hope I didn't mess up… sigh… Oh and thank you so much for the non-centered news. That info really helps me out :)

JasonTKD: Hummm that identity revelation sounds pretty anti-climatic… or at least anti-something… wonder why the creators decided to do it that way… Thanks for the info though… I really appreciate it :) I'm afraid I don't know One More Day… really I don't know a lot of Spidy stuff… there's just so much out there and so little time… sigh…

HiddenFanGirl: Thanks for the answer. I really appreciate the feedback. I'm also really happy that you enjoyed my last chapter so much… things are going to get a little serious as seen in this chapter and probably a couple more but I really hope you will still enjoy.

Kitty-chan and Nya-chan: Sorry it's been so long darling. I know it's been more then a month since your last review but I still hope you will enjoy this…

Kaitsu Himaru: Thanks for your kind words. Yah… I loved the clothes scene too… Really I couldn't resist putting it in… :)

SmileyDJingles: *Chuckles* I'm glad I could make someone happy:) Your review really made my day.

Werewolf5: Hey I'm so happy to see a new reviewer! Glad to have you on board. Yah the whole short chapter thing… I know… bad me… I'm currently trying to extend my chapter at least a bit longer then they used to be. We'll see how that goes. Oh and yes Ne Yo did a song called Miss Independent, but Kelly Clarkson did one two and they are totally different song. Both are really good though. It took me awhile to figure out which one I wanted to use as my chapter title because I like then both. I ended up going with Clarkson's because she's a she and MJ's a she and so yah… that was my reasoning. If you want to it's really easy to look the songs up on youtube and give them a quick listen. And thank you so much by catching my 'defiantly's' I really appreciate it. I will be the first to say my spelling and grammar is not the best but I do try… I bet though, if there are more then one 'defiantly's' around, my computer might be automatically changing them… hummm… them again I might just be an awful speller… yah that's more likely. Anyway thanks again. I'm afraid I don't have time to go back and edit old chapters right now but when the time comes along I will definitely keep that in mind:)

P.S. Chapter title: "The Reason" by Hoobastank (funky name that is… Hoobastank…rolls off the tongue in very… interesting ways… Hoooooooobastank…)