Author's Note: I meant to post this on the release day of the Kakashi Gaiden anime episode, but the full version just turned out to be too long. The full version is very smutty, seriously, so if you have an aversion to smut, I suggest you only read this shortened version… which is pretty smutty itself, but at least it doesn't blatantly violates this site's rules.

If you enjoy smut, there is a link in my profile that will lead you to the full version.

Beta'd by slinkymilinky =]

"…" – speech

'…' - thoughts

He blinked once.

He blinked twice.

Kakashi's head spun as the bright white ceiling came into focus. His hand went to soothe the throbbing in his head.

'Huh?'

No forehead protector? No ANBU mask? Where was he?

An arousing tingle crawled up his leg and his attention snapped downward to find Sakura healing a nasty gash on his calf.

"Yo." He held up his hand in a greeting.

"Give me a minute." Sakura replied distractedly.

Being healed was usually a soothing experience; the medic's chakra would gently seep into his body and pull together any damaged tissue, muscle or bone and regenerate the cells until they were back to normal. Kakashi had been healed by countless medics during his career as a ninja and he could release a general statement saying that being healed was very comforting. However, for some reason, he had always found Sakura's particular chakra to be more…erotic than he probably should have.; it was a little unsettling and it made him less attentive during missions if he knew Sakura would be on duty when he got back.

"Okay, sensei." She looked up at him and grabbed his chart. "I've healed all of your wounds but you'll need to come back on Sunday for a follow up."

"Sure thing." He hopped off the exam table and bolted for the door. "I'll see you later, Sakura!"

"Wait." The medic grabbed the back of his uniform. "We're not done here."

Kakashi's arm remained extended, desperately reaching for the doorknob.

'Ahh, so close.'

He felt himself being thrown back onto the exam table and his eyebrows shot up curiously at the sight of Sakura. The Copy Ninja couldn't remember the last time he had seen her in a nurses' gown but he was sure that it was usually much longer than mid-thigh and he hadn't been able to see the curve of her hip the last time either. Did the top always have that much trouble holding in her breasts like that? And he was almost positive that those heels weren't standard issue the last time he was in the hospital.

"What are you smiling at?" The pink-haired chuunin queried.

"The gods must be smiling on me." His eyes creased.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It looks like they've sent me the naughty nurse today."

"Don't be a pervert." A flash of disbelief passed through her expression before she blushed. "You're past due for your physical, so since you're here we might as well get that done."

Ugh, he hated physicals; there was a very good reason why he's been past due for his latest one.

"Well, as you can see…" Kakashi stretched, squatted and did a few back flips. "I'm perfectly healthy, so there is no need for a…"

The Copy Ninja's eyes took note of his surroundings; concrete walls with no windows and only one exit.

"What happened… to…?" He pointed curiously around the room.

"It's a special room just for you, sensei." Sakura replied with a smug smirk. "You seem to have a habit of ducking out of appointments early."

His eyes became very round as he spotted a seal barring the door. There was no doubt in his mind that he could break it, but the question was: Could he break it before Sakura broke his legs?

Before he could fully contemplate whether or not having his legs broken by Sakura would be more painful than a possibly invasive physical, a piece of fabric hit him in the face. Upon closer inspection, it looked like a surgical mask.

"How considerate of you…" Kakashi stared at his student with an edge of confusion in his expression.

"I was just thinking that you would want to keep your face covered."

"And why would that be an issue?"

"I'm sure you remember that the full physicals require you to change into a hospital gown." She said matter-of-factly.

"A full physical?"

An evil sparkle lit up her expression. "You know – height, weight, reflexes, hernia test, prostate exam…"

Kakashi's Sharingan suddenly became alert. "Wait, what?"

"It's your own fault that you've missed all of your appointments; we usually don't do all of that at once."

"Well, then maybe you could let your poor sensei off the hook this time?"

"Gowns are in there." The pink-haired chuunin pointed towards the cabinet against the opposite wall.

The Copy Ninja's head hung low as he trudged to the corner to find a hospital gown that even remotely fit him.

"You're not even going to give me some privacy?" Kakashi turned his head bitterly towards her.

"I don't see why I should." She replied slyly.

She had a point; if she was really going to go through with all of those procedures he might as well strip and lie down – eagle spread. The Copy Ninja looked up and smiled gently; she had her back turned. At least she was letting him keep a shred of dignity.

Sakura kept her nose buried in Kakashi's chart, wanting to turn around to take a peek but not wanting to show the obvious tinge of pink running across her cheeks. It was a generally accepted fact that a shinobi in an ANBU uniform was the ultimate kunoichi aphrodisiac, but Sakura had just found something even more alluring.

Hatake Kakashi in an ANBU uniform might have been, hands down, the most arousing sight the medic nin had ever seen. It exposed just the right amount of lean muscle to draw her attention to him, but kept enough hidden to make her wonder how mouth watering he would be underneath.

Yes, Hatake Kakashi in his ANBU uniform was definitely a turn-on; she would have called it the ultimate aphrodisiac if she hadn't just caught sight of the Copy Ninja stripping out of his ANBU uniform. Sakura was positive that it just didn't get any sexier than that. It was rare for her to see him without his forehead protector covering his Sharingan, which in turn kept his spiky bangs away from his face. Kakashi's messy hair and mismatched eyes combined with his mask just gave him this mysteriously magnetic aura. And that aura just seemed to get stronger as he was stripping; by all the great Hokage if she looked directly at him she might have melted.

Maybe she could just get another little peek in…

"Ah!" She jumped back when her eyes met a muscled chest. "Kakashi-sensei! Why aren't you dressed?!"

Kakashi's eyes formed happy crescents as he stood in front of her only wearing his grey boxers and blue surgical mask. "None of the gowns fit me, so I thought I would be more comfortable like this."

Sakura took a few steps back, covering her blush with his chart. 'He's up to something… but I can't back down now.'

"We-well, if that's what you prefer then I can't argue with that." Her eye twitched.

"I'm glad you feel that way."

Medic nin or not, Kakashi was glad that he could still fluster her and maybe if he did it enough, she would rush the exam, thereby forgetting about a few embarrassing procedures.

"Take a step on the scale please." She gestured pleasantly.

The Copy Ninja obeyed and watched lazily as his medic fiddled with the weights on the scale. After scribbling down a few numbers she pulled out the measuring rod from the scale and Kakashi blinked when the rod fell over and tapped him on the head.

"You've gained a little bit of weight, sensei." Sakura commented as she wrote down the last number on his chart. "And you're shrinking."

Kakashi's eyebrows furrowed. "That doesn't sound right."

"It's just a consequence of old age." Her dimples formed as she smiled up at him.

"Do it again." He growled and stood at attention.

"If you insist."

Kakashi stood deathly serious as Sakura redid his measurements; he was determined to prove that he was not shrinking or getting fat.

"Ah." Sakura mused as she scribbled down new numbers on the chart. "It looks like you're the same height: five feet and nine inches..."

"I thought so." The Copy Ninja's eyes creased happily.

"…but that doesn't change the fact that you've gained about five pounds." She finished.

"Hmm…" He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "… I suppose my training is responsible for that; muscle weighs more than fat after all…"

"Or you could just be eating more." The pink haired chuunin chimed in from the background.

Kakashi grimaced. "Remember when you used to respect me?"

"Yes, then last year you started telling people you were twenty-five years old." She rolled her eyes at him.

"I was twenty-five last year." The Copy Nin said jovially.

"If twenty-five means thirty, then yes, I'm sure you were twenty-five last year."

Kakashi looked appalled. "Not only do you not respect me, but you don't even trust the word of your sensei?"

"You do realize that I have your medical chart in my hands, don't you?"

"Asuma has it good; his students still respect him." He looked to the ceiling. "I don't even think I remember what it feels like to be respected anymore…"

"I'm sure Yamato-taichou still respects you, sensei." Sakura said offhandedly.

"Do you know what it means to be respected Sakura?" His tone became a bit dramatic. "I'll tell you what it means to me…"

"Stop." Sakura held up her hand in exasperation. "Don't… just don't, sensei."

"You've caught on quickly." He smiled again. "Naruto usually stops me half way through the chorus."

"I may have been spending too much time with you." A stress mark throbbed on her forehead.

"Well, you were always my favorite." Kakashi ruffled her hair.

"I was just telling Sasuke-kun and Naruto that because they were so jealous that you taught me the Chidori and helped me improve my Rasengan…" Sakura paused dramatically. "Oh wait…"

"Now, now, Sakura…" The Copy Ninja waved his hands placatingly.

"Just have a seat, sensei…" She pinched the bridge of her nose as if to fend off a headache. "… so we can get this done."

"Yes, ma'am!" He gave her a salute.

Everything was going according to plan. Kakashi just needed to find a few more buttons to push and he was sure that Sakura would become so annoyed that she would throw him out… or knock him unconscious. Either way, he would be able to get out of a physical exam. Now all he needed to do was find another opening.

The medic knelt down to examine the joints around Kakashi's knees when her sensei hummed pleasantly.

"Is there something wrong, Kakashi-sensei?" Chakra charged in her fist in preparation to test his reflexes.

"This position certainly has potential, don't know think?"

The chakra around Sakura's fists dissipated quickly and was replaced by a fierce blush on her cheeks, it seemed that her patient could affected her with a few simple words, just like he could all those years ago with his detached demeanor and outrageous porn habit. There was a sharp tap of her fist on Kakashi's knee causing his leg to snap outwards. The grunt the Copy Nin ground out disguised the sound of cracking bones. It was then repeated with his other knee.

The pink-haired chuunin looked up at the jounin with a wide smile on her face. "Your reflexes seem fine, sensei."

A bead of sweat trickled down his cheek and was absorbed by his mask.

"Oh, is there something wrong?" Her fake smile hid the fiery gleam in her eyes. "Are the old joints getting to you?"

'Of course she would bring that up again…' The Copy Ninja thought bitterly.

After another quick healing Sakura's hands went to his neck, gently stroking the bare flesh and leaning in to examine him closer.

"What are you doing now?" Kakashi found himself inadvertently talking to her breasts.

"Checking your lymph nodes." She tilted her body from side to side, trying to get a better angle at his neck.

The Copy Ninja noticed how her breasts swayed slightly with her movements and sometimes her arms would push them inwards, accentuating them to him further. After a very distracting blood pressure and temperature check, he realized that his plan was starting to go slightly awry. Kakashi hadn't even noticed how divided his attention was until he felt the cool metal of a stethoscope on his chest, which caused his nipples to harden considerably. His grey eye followed her hand carefully, while his Sharingan kept her cleavage in its view. The tomoe spun discreetly, memorizing the shape and movements of her breasts. It even picked up a faint swelling at the peaks of her chest…

'She's not wearing a bra!' The revelation danced around the jounin's head, sending erotic twitches into his boxers. 'This is not what I need right now…

Everything continued swimmingly until…

"Ah!" Kakashi grunted as pain slashed into his chest.

"Oh, sorry sensei!" Sakura winced. "I guess I chipped a nail earlier…"

"I wish you would've paid more attention to that…" He grumbled and rubbed his chest.

"Oh, don't such a baby, Copy Ninja."

"Your bedside manner is terrible, I'd like to see how you would react if I cut into the most sensitive part of your chest."

"Terrible bedside manner?" She rolled her eyes. "Well, if you're going to be like that…"

Sakura leaned downward and took his nipple into her mouth, giving it a soft kiss.

"Is that better?" She stared up sweetly into his flabbergasted expression.

'What the holy fuck was that?!' Kakashi's mind screamed but the words just couldn't come out of his mouth.

The medic chuckled and ignored her patient's surprise. "I need you to take a deep breath."

The jounin stared at her.

"Sensei!" Sakura tapped his chest. "Breathe!"

There was a sharp intake of breath in his lungs followed by rapid exhaling before he could follow her directions. His eyes darted around suspiciously as she moved behind him with the stethoscope. This had to be some sort of genjutsu; there was no way that the real Sakura would do something like that. Maybe she would've done the "kiss to make it better" thing as a joke, but he distinctly felt her suck on his nipple as she pulled away. His Sharingan didn't pick up anything unusual and he didn't want to embarrass himself by picking up his ninjato and stabbing himself if he really wasn't caught in a genjutsu. For a moment he thought that maybe somebody had used a Transformation Jutsu, but Kakashi had already recognized Sakura's scent and the way her chakra felt as she was healing him. This was most definitely Sakura, but what was she up to?

"Kakashi-sensei!" The pink haired chuunin snapped her fingers in his face. "Look at me."

'That shouldn't be too problematic.' The jounin thought as a light shined into his eye. 'At least I don't have to worry about talking to her breasts again.'

Sakura leaned closer to him, forcing his eye to follow the light around the room. She paid special attention to his Sharingan, which wasn't odd seeing how most medics did. He didn't really understand why though; it's not like anybody knew enough about it to diagnose anything that might be wrong.

'She seems to be getting kind of close…' He frowned beneath his borrowed mask. 'It's too bad I can't smell her with this mask on; damn it, I should've just kept my regular one.'

"What are you doing?" Kakashi snapped his head back suddenly, away from the intrusive, prickling sensation flooding into his eye socket.

"There are some swollen nerves in your Sharingan; I'm just going to heal them."

The Copy Ninja's eyebrows furrowed.

"You're starting to go blind in that eye; it's probably from overuse of your Mangekyou Sharingan." Sakura looked concerned. "The same thing is happening to Sasuke-kun; the healing will help slow down the deterioration of your vision until we can find a permanent fix."

Kakashi couldn't help but be impressed; nobody had ever told him any beneficial information about his Sharingan before. Maybe he should start going to his check-ups, at least if Sakura was his medic. He gave her a permissive nod and felt the tingle of her chakra return to his eye; it spread down through his chest and straight to his groin. The jounin had no idea how she could have such an effect on him… especially with an eye exam! Perhaps Icha Icha was starting to warp his mind; there were plenty of nurse-patient scenarios and this situation seemed suspiciously familiar...

"Okay." She put away the light and Kakashi couldn't help but notice her blush. "I'm going to start your hernia test, so you're going to have to…"

"Have to what?" His eyes creased at her.

"Have…to…" A vein throbbed silently in her forehead. "Have to… take off your boxers…"

"Why, Sakura!" The Copy Ninja gasped dramatically. "That is completely unprofessional; I'm going to have to report you!"

"Sensei…" She turned to the cabinet behind her to find gloves. "… don't make this harder than it already is."

'I could say the same to you…' Kakashi tilted his head slightly as she bent over to look for the gloves in the far back of the cabinet.

The, much too long, slit at the back of her medic's gown gave him a teasing view of her creamy thighs and perfectly rounded backside. If he could tilt his head far enough maybe, just maybe, he could see the cut and color of her panties. Kakashi wasn't sure when but it seemed that he had already given in to his perverted tendencies and was just about to throw caution concerning his student to the wind. Unfortunately for him Sakura had located the latex gloves before he was done with his investigation.

"Kakashi-sensei…" The medic sighed. "Please…"

"If you really wanted to see me naked, there are other ways to get that done."

"I want you…" She blushed. "… to be serious about this."

"Of course, Medic Sakura." He saluted and froze in place.

"Well?"

"If you want to take a look, you're going to have to be a professional and take the initiative." His eyes creased smugly. "Haven't I imparted that lesson on you?"

Sakura's brow twitched.

She took a deep breath and marched up to him. "I hate you."

Kakashi's eyes closed in a broad smile and scratched the back of his head but his eyes quickly snapped open when he felt a sudden chill around his manhood. His eyes went down to find Sakura knelt in front of him with his boxers around his ankles. The Copy Ninja jumped a bit when he felt hands poking around his pubic area and, he desperately wished he was imagining it otherwise he might start getting the wrong ideas, somewhat fondling his penis and scrotum.

What was taking her so long? Was she impressed? Did it matter if she was impressed?

'Yes…yes it did.' Kakashi thought quietly.

"Uhh, you about done down there?" He carefully kept his eyes away from her.

"Are you getting testy?" She grinned.

"That's very funny." Kakashi grimaced slightly, allowing his treacherous Sharingan to catch sight of her examining him. 'Oh, God… if she would just open her mouth…'

Damn, he had to stop thinking like that. Dirty thoughts lead to those naughty tingles, which would lead to hard, throbbing erections and he would like to keep his aloof persona intact, especially around his student, and if he were to get a boner from a hernia exam that just might shatter the appearance he wanted to project. She just needed to hurry and up… oh fuck; he was getting hard. Did Sakura have to caress his dick like that? No, not caress; she was examining him. Nurses do not caress their patients' cocks during an examination! Except… maybe in an Icha Icha novel… there were some pretty good scenes in Icha Icha Paradise when Junko had to pose as a nurse to find her target who had a very distinctive scar on his inner thigh. Needless to say, she had to go through many patients and each examination was rather… intimate. Icha Icha Tactics had some really good ones where…

'Oh shit!' Kakashi snapped to attention. 'Did she just squeeze my balls?'

"I'm impressed, sensei."

'Damn right you are.' He thought smugly.

"Most shinobi don't take care of themselves down there; it's good to know you're not a mess."

"Well…" He murmured sheepishly, his ego deflating a little. "You gotta give the people what they want."

"I'm sure you do." A flicker of something Kakashi couldn't quite identify flashed through her eyes.

"Okay…" Sakura stood up, only a slight hint of pink on her cheeks. "You look fine down there. You're going to have to turn around and bend over for me, sensei."

The Copy Ninja swallowed his anxiousness quickly, ignoring that he was already at half-mast and replied, "Isn't that supposed to be my line?"

"Don't be a smart-ass."

"I wouldn't have to be if you weren't so desperate to see my ass."

"Sensei, I swear on every Hokage that I will make this as painful as possible if you don't turn around and bend over, right now!" She barked in frustration.

"Okay, okay…" He held out his hands placatingly. "Don't make any rash decisions…"

'Mission failed…' The Copy Ninja grumbled in his head as he got into position. 'This is probably the most humiliating thing that as ever… Oh…OH!'

A slickened, slender gloved finger pushed its way through the tight ring of muscle, teasingly moving in and out to gently stretch him. Kakashi started chewing on his lip as her finger went deeper, the joints on her index finger pushing the walls of his ass apart ever so slightly more than the rest of the appendage. He felt her knuckle pressing against his entrance, the very tip of her finger pushing against that spot. That one damn spot that took him days to build up the courage to find when he was a teenage-jounin, pouring over the illustrations of the first volumes of Icha Icha Paradise.

"Hmm…" Sakura mused curiously.

"Some…thing… wrong?" The Copy Ninja said slowly, not wanting to give her the satisfaction of a stammer, but acutely aware of the biggest erection of his lifetime being crushed between his stomach and the exam table.

"Not at all." Her voice held a measured amount of smugness.

"Well, then what's…"

Kakashi cut his sentence short, in fear of his voice cracking. His eyes bulged and his fingers tightened painfully around the edges of the table. The Copy Ninja had never in his sixteen years of sexual experiences with civilians, kunoichi, prostitutes and various other mission objectives had felt such an amazing jolt of pleasure. What was she doing to him? If he hadn't been consciously using everything he had to hold back, Kakashi just might have blown himself all over the sterilized table.

'Damn her…' He growled in his head, concentrating on the way she was still fingering him. 'How is she…?'

Then it hit him.

'She's using chakra!'

He had to put a stop to this. She had another thing coming if she thought that he would just let his student humiliate him like this. Kakashi planted his palms firmly on the table for leverage and began to push himself up. However, he ended up wide-eyed as he jolted forward, almost smashing his face into the wall. Sakura had added a second finger to him, doubling the amount of chakra that was now pulsating against his prostate.

'Fuck!' The Copy Ninja felt his medic twist her fingers around inside of him. 'I'm so close… too close…!'

The silver-haired jounin couldn't pull away now. There wasn't a creature in existence that could stop such a pleasing sensation when they were this close to their climax. Kakashi took pride in the fact that he hadn't moaned aloud during this procedure, this tortuous in and out, in and out and in and out. Soon, his eyes screwed shut, his body tensed and the most pleasingly erotic sensation filled his body along with the mass release of his hot, sticky seed that was beyond satisfying. A pleasured rumble escaped him as he came all over the, now, unsterilized exam table and was left with a bewildered, labored breathing that was starting to overtake his body.

"Whew… I'm glad that's done." He felt Sakura's fingers slide out of him and the sound of her gloves snapping off. "Are you okay, sensei?"

The teasing in her voice was not lost on him.

"Do you normally last that long?"

The Copy Nin's eyes rounded; she was simply insulting him now. He had to get out of here before he did anything rash… or perverted. Kakashi yanked up his boxers, gathered his clothes and quickly tried to break the seal barring the exit.

'I am not going to go home and masturbate…' He growled in his head between hand seals. 'I will not…"

Yes, he wouldn't go home and masturbate, mainly because he was so turned on that he probably wouldn't make it home anyway. Hell, Kakashi would be lucky to make it to the nearest men's room to do it.

"You always preached the virtues of patience to Naruto." Sakura drawled from behind him. "Why are you rushing?"

'Because I just learned that my most innocent student just might be enough of a pervert to rival me…' Kakashi rested his head against the door.

"We're not even finished yet."

"What else could we possibly have to do?" The silver-haired jounin turned, his voice sounding more haggard than he intended.

The medic was sitting on the only untainted part of the exam table and crossed her legs, looking rather pleased with herself. Kakashi's eyes rounded for the third time that day as he watched her lazily drag her fingers through his spilt orgasm. His mouth fell open in his mask as she brought her fingers to her lips and gently licked the sticky liquid off one finger, then the next and finally inserting them into her mouth to suck off the remaining bits of his warm seed.

"It's your turn to give me a check-up."