Love Potion # 9
CHAPTER ONE: FIRE BURN & CAULDRON BUBBLE
"Hold it right there, child."
Kitty stopped dead in her tracks, cringing. "Oh, hey!" she chirped without turning around. Her voice was much too bright to be natural. "Ororo! I didn't, like, know you were in here." She grinned nervously. "What a, like, pleasant surprise."
"Today is my turn to make lunch." Suspicious, the white-haired woman stepped closer. "What exactly are you doing in the kitchen? It's off-limits, you know. You shouldn't be here. Unless, of course, you happen to have dishwashing duty."
"No," Kitty said hastily. "That was, like, last week." She edged closer to the door. She seemed to be hiding something underneath her shirt, making the pink fabric bulge oddly. "I was just in here to get a - to get a glass of water."
"I don't see you holding a glass."
"Uh - I, like, put in the sink." Kitty crossed her fingers, out of sight of Ororo. "I washed it and everything."
"I don't see a glass in the sink, either." Ororo planted her hands on her hips. "Child, are you lying to me?"
"No," said Kitty quickly. She paused. "Well. Not really."
Ororo cocked an eyebrow. "I see."
Kitty hung her head.
It was a warm morning in early September. School had just started back up again, a fact which was greeted with varying excitement and disgust, depending on the student. At the Xavier Institute, everything was moving like clockwork. For the first time in months, everything was peaceful and relaxed; nothing was out of the ordinary. Nothing, except for this. Ororo stepped closer. "Kitty, turn around."
Kitty winced. "I - I, like, can't."
"Why not?"
"I just - I just can't." Kitty gave a gusty sigh of frustration. "Listen, Ororo, I'm not doing anything wrong! I, like, promise! Scott wants me in the Danger Room in ten minutes and I have to write a letter to one of my friends back home. Plus, I have loads of homework. Can't I, like, go? Please?"
"Not until you show me what you're hiding." Her voice was firm. "Turn around."
Kitty sighed again, this time resignedly. Slowly, awkwardly, she began to turn around, clutching her bulging stomach with both hands. "This is, like, totally unfair."
"I have my own opinion on that." Ororo peered at the girl's bulky sweater, eyes wide in amazement. "What do you have under there? The entire refrigerator?"
"Ha, ha." Kitty rolled her eyes. "OK, can I, like, go now?"
"Certainly not. Show me what you're hiding."
"Ororo!"
"Now."
Realizing that it was useless to argue, Kitty waddled her way to the counter. Grumbling and scowling, she reached a hand up her shirt. She paused for one last desperate effort. Her face grew imploring. "Please let me leave?" she pleaded, batting her eyelashes. "Pretty please with sugar on top?"
Ororo was unmoved. "That may work with Kurt, but not with me. Now show me what you're hiding before I have to call the professor."
Kitty glowered. "Fine!" Quickly and angrily, she emptied the contents of her sweater onto the counter. Seeds rolled every which way while a large bottle nearly toppled over the edge. Kitty caught it just in time. "There," she said sullenly. "It's just, like, food, OK? I was hungry. I'm, like, sorry. Can I go?"
"Wait one moment." Bewildered, Ororo began picking through the objects on the counter. She read the label on the bottle. "Sweet red wine?" She looked up at Kitty, slightly shocked. "Kitty, you're a bit young to be drinking this early in the morning."
Kitty shrugged.
Ororo continued to study the food. "Basil leaves - cloves - apple seeds - vanilla extract - strawberry juice - apple juice - ginseng root - and what are these?" She held a tiny packet up to the window. "Rose petals? Where did you find rose petals in the kitchen?"
"I didn't. I found them in, like, the garden."
Ororo narrowed her eyes. "Seems like a strange snack to me."
Kitty carefully avoided her gaze.
"Most students would have smuggled peanut butter and crackers, not basil leaves." Ororo tapped her chin thoughtfully. "There's something very fishy about all this."
"What time is it?"
"Why do you need to know?"
"Just tell me." Kitty seemed suddenly anxious. "Please."
Ororo looked at her wristwatch. "A quarter past eight."
"A quarter past eight! Like, this is horrible!" Kitty's face grew tragic. "Oh, Ororo, you have to let me go. Please! I'm, like, begging you. It's really important! Like, I'll do anything you want, just let me leave!"
"What's important? Kitty, it's a Sunday! No school!"
"It's so important, Ororo. I'm, like, totally desperate. I have to go, I have to. You got to, like, understand me." She clasped her hands, almost crying. "Please! Please!"
Ororo was baffled and a little suspicious. "Kitty, I can't. Not until you explain-"
The door burst open.
Both looked over, startled.
It was Scott. He seemed harried. "Ororo," he gasped, "there's - trouble. In the Danger Room. Evan - got - hurt. You'd better come - quickly."
"Oh, good lord!" Ororo dashed across the floor. At the door, she paused, giving Kitty a stern look. "I'm warning you, child; if I come back and you're not here there will mean a great deal of trouble!" Then she was gone, trailing on Scott's heels.
Kitty waited until her footsteps had faded into silence. With a quick furtive glance around the kitchen, she gathered the ingredients back under her shirt. "Sorry, Ororo," she muttered, "but I, like, have to do this." Then, glancing around to make sure nobody was watching, she scurried out of the kitchen and up the stairs to the room she shared with Rogue.
"Kitty!" Rogue's enraged voice began the moment Kitty stepped over the threshold. "What the hell are these things doing in here? Ah almost burned the curtains down! Have you gone crazy again?"
Kitty slammed the door, scrambled with the lock, and then leaned limply against the door, breathing hard. "No."
"Then what are they?"
"Candles."
Rogue rolled her eyes disgustedly. "Ah know that. Ah meant, what are they here for? They're horrible. They make the room smell like a French brothel."
Kitty surveyed the little circle of pink votive candles with a proud smile. "They are pretty, like, overpowering, aren't they?"
Rogue, sitting on her bed with a stack of textbooks, gave Kitty a threatening glare. She was obviously at the end of her rope. "If you don't tell me what's going on right now, Ah swear Ah'm going to take your favorite sweater and tear all the buttons off." She caught sight of Kitty's bulging shirtfront and her jaw drooped open. She shook her head slowly. "That's it. Ah need a new roommate."
"Like, Rogue, totally chill, OK?" Kitty made her way to the bed and began removing the food from underneath her shirt. "I swear, I'm not doing anything, like, dangerous. Relax."
"What's that? Wine?" Suspicious and incredulous, Rogue sidestepped the ring of candles and came to survey the goods. "Leaves? Flowers? Seeds? What, have you gone New Age on us?"
"You're the one who believes in hardcore witchcraft," Kitty said calmly, spreading her ingredients evenly over the bed. "I'm just, like, casting one harmless little spell."
"Ah should have guessed." Rogue started for the door. "Call me when it's over, OK? Ah don't want to be turned into a frog."
"Rogue!" Kitty grabbed the edge of her shirt. "Like, hold on a moment! I'm not turning anybody into a frog. Don't, like, worry about it." She smiled innocently. "Anyhow, I sort of need your help."
Rogue wrenched free from her grasp and looked at her distrustfully. "What spell is it?"
"Come on. Just, like, promise you'll help. You owe me one. Remember how I, like, showed you the answers to that calculus test?"
"Ah'm not promising anything until Ah know what spell you're casting."
Kitty sighed resignedly. "Well, it's not really, like, a spell. I mean, it is, but it's more like a - like a recipe. A recipe for a potion."
"What sort of potion?"
"A love potion," Kitty admitted reluctantly.
Rogue instantly headed for the door. "That's it. Ah'm out of here."
"No, no, no, no!" Kitty ran ahead desperately and blocked her exit. "Listen, Rogue, I, like, totally need your help, OK? I can't do it without you. It won't affect you at all, I promise. I'll, like, only use it on one person and that's it. You won't even have to look at it if you don't want to." She widened her eyes imploringly. "Please?"
"Ah hate love potions," Rogue snapped, trying to push past.
Kitty outmanuevered her. "Of course, I could always, like, tell the principal that you had help with that test," she suggested slyly. "That might really hurt your chances of, like, getting out of phys ed this year."
"You wouldn't." Rogue narrowed her eyes. "You wouldn't dare."
"I'm a desperate girl, Rogue. Just, like, promise me you'll help." She glanced nervously at the clock. "And hurry! It's like, five till nine. We hardly have any time."
Rogue relented with a scowl. "Fine. But only because you blackmailed me! Ah'm not doing this because Ah like you! Remember that."
"Thanks, Rogue," Kitty said, smiling with relief. "You're, like, a total savior. All right," she added, voice growing business-like. "Let's get busy. We have to have everything ready at, like, nine o'clock precisely."
"Why?" Rogue asked, following her as she gathered up all the ingredients.
"'Cause this is Love Potion #9," Kitty said, as if it should be obvious. "Ninth hour of the ninth day of the ninth month. September the Ninth at nine o'clock AM. That's in four minutes. Nine votive candles, nine apple seeds, nine, like, everything." She gestured towards the closet. "Could you, like, get the cauldron and the wooden spoon?"
Rogue obeyed. "Where the hell did you get the cauldron?" she asked, amazed. It was small and heavy and ancient. "A museum?"
"You'd be surprised what you can find in the basement. Just set it down in the center of the votive candles, OK?" Kitty opened the bottle of wine. "Now. I have to dump all this, like, stuff in, and then stir it nine times. You can chant the incantation."
"Why me?"
"Because you want to skip phys ed this year."
Rogue rolled her eyes.
"Nine ounces of wine, nine basil leaves, nine rose petals, nine cloves, nine drops of vanilla, nine drops of apple juice, nine drops of strawberry juice, nine bits of gingseng root, and like-" Kitty suddenly stopped, her brow furrowed. "Oh, no!"
"What?"
"Only eight apple seeds. I must have, like, lost one." Kitty bit her lower lip anxiously. "I wonder if it will still, like, work, with one apple seed missing?"
"Probably not."
"But there's no time to get another one."
Rogue shrugged.
Kitty gazed at the clock, then back at the cauldron and its odd mixture. She made a quick decision. "Well, I'll just have to, like, hope for the best," she said firmly, tossing the seeds inside and picking up the wooden spoon. "I can't wait till next year to try again. This is, like, my only chance." She looked at Rogue. "Ready?"
"No."
"You, like, have to be. You promised to help. Just read the words I wrote here." She handed Rogue a slip of paper. "Almost time."
"This is ridiculous," Rogue muttered, scanning the paper. "Insane."
"One minute -"
"Ah can't believe Ah'm doing this."
The clock struck nine. "Now!" Kitty began stirring vigorously. "Read, Rogue! Like, now!"
Rogue cleared her throat. Self-consciously, she recited: "LET THE ONE WHO DRINKS THIS WINE, SHOWER ME WITH LOVE DIVINE. SWEET LOVE POTION NUMBER NINE, MAKE HIS LOVE FOREVER MINE." A strong breeze ruffled the curtains. Kitty stopped stirring. "There. Ah did it." Rogue dropped the paper onto the floor. "Now Ah'm outta here. Hasta la vista, you crazy little weirdo."
"Wait! You, like, still have to help me boil it." Kitty covered the cauldron with a cloth. "Then we strain it through a cheesecloth and bless it in the names of, like, the nine love-goddesses. And then-" She grinned. "We chill and serve!"
"To who?"
"That's for me to know and you to, like, find out," Kitty said, blushing a little. She hastily changed the subject. "Anyhow, come on. We don't have much time before Ororo gets back to the kitchen. And, like, I have a lot of explaining to do to her; I don't want to run into her any sooner than I have to."
The two girls, holding the cauldron between them, made their way furtively into the hallway.
Neither of them noticed the ninth apple seed lying on the bed.