Hello people! so here's the very last chapter of Insanity is relative! I hope you like it!

I don't own Harry Potter

Bellatrix was trembling with overwhelming ecstasy and fear. She could barely breathe she was so determined; determined to join him, determined to become his most faithful servant.

Bellatrix could not believe how close she was to him, merely three seats down the table. She shivered in delight at the thought and kept her gaze on his face, without ever meeting his scarlet eyes. She had to admit that he wasn't exactly as she had picture him. In her mind, Voldemort was a tall handsome man, not strangely deformed and deathly pale. As she looked upon him now, she realized how foolish she had been. Being handsome was like wanting to fit in with the other millions who wanted the same thing. It was falling prey to vanity and arrogance. He was above all those mortal weaknesses. He was absolutely perfect.

It had been Rodolphus's father who offered up the Lestrange manor for Lord Voldemort's use and it was as her step-father announced his decision, on her wedding night, that Bellatrix found at that she had, in fact, married the son of one of the original Death Eaters and Rodolpus also had the intention of following his father's footsteps. After that moment, Bellatrix had decided that she did not regret marrying Rodolphus Lestrange…at least until she found herself before him. Then all the regret came crashing down upon her once more until she thought she'd drown in it. It was as he apparated in the hall, running his cold eyes over her without a word, that she realized that she was madly in love with him. She did not know why she hadn't figured it out before. She loved him, yes, but she had always thought that it was the love that came from extreme admiration, to the point of obsession. Now she realized that it was another type of love; the type she should have felt for Rodolphus. This love was an immensely powerful sexual and emotional attraction one felt for their lover. She had been an idiot, she knew that. How could she have not realized? She was being an idiot, even now, for allowing herself to love him. She knew that it would only end in tears and pain.

There were other men seated at the table. She recognized most of them as the sons of well-known pureblooded families. Some of them were even her old classmates! She found it almost humorous how, for the past five years or so, she had been questioning every pure-blooded friend and relation she knew, in hopes of finding a way to him, only to find out that most of his Death Eaters were actually good friends of the House of Black. She realized now, as she received their angry glares, that it was because she was a woman that they kept silent about their double lives. They did not believe it practical to have her amongst them. They did not think that she would be of any help. They probably feared that, being a woman, she would use her beauty and sexuality in order to climb the social pyramid. For all these reasons, they had not told her the truth. For all theses reasons, she decided to prove them wrong.

"Before we begin, Lestrange tells me his son wishes to pledge his life to Lord Voldemort. Am I correct Rodolphus?"

Voldemort's voice came as a surprise to her. Again, she had imagined it to be different. It was so very cold and emotionless. He did not speak loudly, as if he knew that his Death Eaters would strain to hear his words even if he were to whisper. She knew she would.

"Ye-yes My Lord." Rodolphus said, nervousness ringing clearly in his voice. Bellatrix blushed, utterly embarrassed by her husband's weakness.

Raising his long spidery fingers, the Lord Voldemort gestured him forward. Flushed with pleasure yet clearly afraid, Rodolphus got to his feet and made his way towards his new master, at the head of the table. The next series if events puzzled Bellatrix. As she stared at her husband, silently begging him not ruin her chances, he gave a strange spasm and then fell into what looked like a trance. For only a few minutes, both men were completely silent, standing motionless before each other while the others waited. During those painfully long minutes, the lone witch glanced at the Death Eaters, comforted to see that some were just as puzzled as she was and infuriated when she noticed most had smug smiles plastered on their smug faces, understanding shinning in their eyes. Her eyes met her soon-to-be brother in law who quickly averted his gaze, as if ashamed to know her. She did not understand. Was she not from the House of Black? Married to a Lestrange? In a pure world, she could have been the queen! So why was it that in the presence of her king, she was suddenly treated like some simple harlot?

"Lucius what's happ-?"

"Legilimency" He answered curtly, clearly ordering her to stop speaking. Her pride hurting, she immediately opened her mouth to retort just as Rodolphus began to shake violently, clearly out of his trance.

"Hold out your left arm." The dark wizard instructed as he took out his wand, acting as if nothing had just happened.

Rodolphus did exactly as he was told, holding out his shaking arm between him and Voldemort.

The Dark Lord brought his wand down in a sharp stab upon his arm and her husband clutched it, grimacing in pain. Almost immediately after, he was ordered back to his place with not a single explanation made. All of this, Bellatrix watched in awe, feeling her heart beat wildly in her heaving chest.

"Your life belongs to me now, Rodolphus Lestrange. You will do well to remember that."

"It is a great honor to serve you, My Lord." The newly enlisted Death Eater replied.

Curiously, Bellatrix peered over his arm at the strange black mark her idol had left on her husband's arm but she didn't have much time to fully inspect it for she suddenly realized that Voldemort had not called out her name. He was now looking down at a piece of parchment that appeared to be a long list of names, lost in thought.

Fear filled her lungs like air, silently suffocating her as she fought against the urge to panic. Was she going to be overlooked as simply the wife of a Death Eater? She glanced around the room, searching for help but the men ignored her. She had waited so many years! She was not about to be ignored for the sake of the egos of men! Fear made place for anger and passion and before she could control herself she stood.

He looked up.

"My Lord? I wish to pledge my life as well." She announced, her voice sounding weaker and more afraid as she would have liked.

The room went incredibly silent and Bellatrix could almost see the tension in the air. All the men bore expressions of horror on their faces, eyes reverting between their master and the crazy woman.

Voldemort's eyes narrowed with disdain.

"You? What can you do for me?" He asked, a cruel smirk appearing on his waxy-pale face.

'This is it.' She thought. 'My chance to prove myself.'

She clutched the edge of the table, forcing more strength into her voice.

"I can fight for you, my Lord!" She said, the words poured from her lips like clear water, as clear as the truth in her words. And just like water, she could not stop the words once they escaped. Exhilaration overcame her fear and anger.

"I am talented, I swear I am! With more training and time, I promise you I will become more powerful then any of your other Death Eaters!"

Angry hisses filled the room as the men whispered to each other, strongly displeased.

"It is true!" Bellatrix snarled, glaring down at them, silently challenging them to prove her wrong. She then looked back up at Voldemort, clear adoration shinning in her dark eyes.

"My Lord, you must know that I speak the truth! I do not join you out of fear or lust for my own power! I join you because you are the rightful master of this world and I am but a servant! A servant who worships you and who would fight until the end if only to please you!"

The moment she finished, the overwhelming silence pressed against her eardrums and for a moment, she feared she had gone too far. She dropped her gaze quickly and dared not look back up as she awaited his response, silently cursing herself and every other Death Eater in the room.

"Come here girl."

Bellatrix glanced up, too shocked and frightened to speak. The courage (or insanity) that had momentarily possessed her had now completely abandoned her in her moment of need. She did go and stood before him. Something strange happened the moment their eyes met. The floor disappeared from under her feet and the walls disintegrated into smoke. Bellatrix was standing alone in complete darkness with only her thumping heart to be heard. Before she had time to process what was happening, the scenery changed again...

She is standing in the entrance hall of the Black Manor, Andromeda by her side, holding her hand. They wait anxiously, not quite certain of what is going on, Dromeda; with her thumb in her mouth, Bella; fiddling with the hem of her dress. The sudden crack, loud to a child's ears and the apparition of their parents surprises the two girls. They freeze. The woman they call mother comes towards them, carrying a bundle of cloth in one arm. She lowers the bundle, allowing the girls to see the little babe. She is a week old. Bella thinks she looks like one of the gnomes they used to have in their garden before they were all exterminated. She does not want to look at her anymore but her father is now behind her, hands placed on her shoulder, and she cannot move.

"What do you think?" He asks her.

She looks back down at the baby and notices the pale strands of blond hair on its ugly head. She looks at her father, her mother, her sister…they all have black hair. She doesn't like it. She doesn't like the fact that she will now have to call her sister.

"A that?" Dromeda mumbles in her baby voice, pointing at the newborn with her spit covered thumb. It was her way of asking questions.

"Her name is Narcissa." Mother replies, stroking the baby's head.

"She's not a Black." Bella affirms quite confidently.

Her mother gets angry. Her father is exasperated. It all ends in angry tears and a resentful apology on Bellatrix's behalf .

Narcissa is an ugly name. She is comforted by that fact. She decides that she will think up the ugliest nickname for her…something to match that ugly pale hair. Something like...Cissy…yes that would work just fine.

Other memories played before her eyes at mind-blowing speed. However, some of her memories did not seem to rush past as quickly as the others and Bellatrix knew that these were the memories that Voldemort found most interesting. Every single, painful memory was pried from the darkest corners of her mind and it felt like she is going to see her entire life. Everything she had ever felt, every secret she had ever protected, was laid out and in the open for Voldemort to see and Bellatrix knew that everything depended on this moment....

Bellatrix runs across the dusty floor, in one of her best dresses, a priceless goblin-made crown upon her head and a large stick at hand. She jumps onto the windowsill, brandishing the stick like a weapon. It is her magic sword. She is a great witch-queen. And Kreacher is the dreaded dragon. She fights valiantly, brandishing her stick at the house-elf who pretends to fight back to the best of his capabilities but with much less enthusiasm.

"I will protect my people!" Bellatrix shouts, her weapon jabbing here and there. Kreacher cannot dodge it. It is coming too fast. The large stick collides with his jaw and he falls to the ground. A peel of laughter escapes Bella's throat as she waves her stick, victoriously.

"I killed the dragon!" She exclaims, still laughing.

Kreacher coughs up a broken tooth and smiles…

Bellatrix could feel herself blush with shame as she heard a cold chuckle ring in her mind. She hoped dearly that Lord Voldemort would not penalize her for being a foolish child.

"Rabastan! Rabastan I'm on the team!"

Bellatrix appears at the top of the hill, dressed in silver and emerald Quiditch robes. Her beautifully wild black hair tied in a long braid down her back. Rabastan Lestrange stands near the lake, staring up at her, his eyes shinning with pleasure. Overwhelming pride and happiness takes control of her mind and she sprints down the hill, robes bellowing around her. She laughs, feeling like a little girl again. She doesn't notice the rest of her friends, sprawled lazily on the grass. She runs straight for him, delighted with herself. He smiles, holding out his arms to her. She jumps into them, wrapping her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck.

"Well done Bella." Rabastan laughs, a blush slowly working its way onto his cheeks.

"I knew they'd choose you."

Bella does the next thing that comes to mind. She leans forward and kisses him. Her very first kiss. But the kiss is cut short as Rabastan stumbles backwards in shock and brings them both plunging into the ice-cold lake, still intertwined. Bellatrix feels impossibly happy. She wants to remain under that cool calming water to savor her victory but kicks nevertheless, her hand finding Rabastan's in the darkness. They surface to the sound of wolf whistles and laughter…

Bellatrix remembered that day. It had been one of her fondest memories. She wondered what the Dark Lord thought of it...or if he cared at all. Probably not.

He moans her name. He whispers how much he loves her in her ears as she lets her hands wonder over his body, finding those places that make him groan louder. Her skin tingles with excitement and every breath is getting harder to take but she keeps her mouth tightly shut.

"Bella…Bella I love you." He moans again.

She looks up at him, seeing someone else in her mind. She sees the dark handsome man who haunts her dreams every night and she whishes with all her heart that it could be him in Rabastan's place. Bellatrix keeps her mouth tightly shut because she is afraid that it would not be Rabastan's name that would escape her lips…

Bellatrix was almost too horrified to pay any attention to the next stream of memories. How could she have forgotten about that? She was mortified. How would she be able to join his ranks now?

The mudblood boy twists in odd angles, thrashing about. His face is screwed up tightly and he is begging for mercy. She hates him. She almost wants to kill him. Earlier that day, he had hexed her baby sister because she had used the word 'mudblood'. Her darling sister is now in the Hospital Wing and this boy is now in excruciating pain, with no one to hear his cries. The others laugh behind her. She knows they admire her for her guts and confidence. She does not care at the moment. All she cares about is the overwhelming sense of power and hate she feels. She loves it. She loves having power over him…over the world. At any moment, at any time, she could inflict pain on anyone who dared disrespect her. She finds it hard to believe that she had spent so many years of her life without the Cruciatus Curse. It almost feels unfair. But she is making up for it now. She wishes she was doing it for him... for Voldemort. It had always been for him. Every breath she took was for him. But this time…it was for Cissy.

At last, Bellatrix was freed from her memories, trembling with fright. She knew that he had seen everything and was judging her. Would he understand the complete and total devotion she felt for him? Would that be enough? She dared not look at him now. She feared that even one wrong move would be the end of her hopes. So she waited, thinking over what she had seen in her mind. Many of those memories were forgotten memories she did not want to remember. She easily discarded them again. She was well trained that way. She could easily bend her mind to her advantage. When she was younger, when her parents would shout at each other late into the night, Bellatrix would shut her mind, forcing herself to forget. That skill grew with her and helped her enormously. It helped her now as she quickly shut her mind on those reminiscences who were bleeding like freshly opened wounds.

Still the Dark Lord did not stir. Apparently she was far more puzzling then her husband. She did not know if that was bad or good. She could feel the Death Eaters hard stares on her. She could catch their angry expressions from the corner of her eye. So she took refuge…refuge in those memories that she did not want to forget again. Those rare moments in her life where she had been truly happy. She caressed them silently, like jewels amongst cold black coal. Those were the memories that gave her courage and the strength to fight back, to prove them all wrong.

"Your arm, Bellatrix."

It came so quickly, so unexpected, that Bellatrix shivered with delight and anticipation. She held out her arm, only too willingly and nearly gasped out in pain as Voldemort stabbed her arm with his wand; the same way he had Rodolphus's. As soon as the tip pressed against her pale skin, her arm began to burn with excruciating pain and she was forced to clutch it just as Rodolphus had. She could feel the poison coursing through her veins, burning her flesh until it was black and dead. She hurried back to her seat, regretting not have made the most of her closeness with The Dark Lord. As she settled back down, she carefully loosened her grip on her left arm and stared at the throbbing mark on her arm, formed from the burnt flesh. It looked like someone had tattooed a skull with the tongue of a snake onto her forearm. She couldn't have been more proud.

"Oh and Black?"

Bellatrix flushed and looked up.

"Yes My Lord?"

Her onyx eyes met his scarlet ones for only one moment before she quickly focused on his mouth, her stomach aflutter.

"I'm holding you to that promise."

Puzzled, Bellatrix frantically tried to recall the promise that she had made, silently cursing herself. And that's when she remembered it.

'With more training and time, I promise you I will become more powerful then any of your other Death Eaters!'

Her heart swelling up with pride and joy, she smiled and affirmed quite confidently;

"I will not let you down, My Lord."

soooooo? what d'you think? i really hoped you liked it. please let me know its always a pleasure to get reviews! Thanks for reading this story!
lots of love from the silly frog! :D
-xxx-