Hello people! :D

A/N: I thought of doing a funny story and this was the result!

Warning: Swearing, drunkness, and nudity (with sexual implications) up ahead!

Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine! *cries* Wish it was though!

FULL SUMMARY:

Las Vegas: the desired destination for the group of Konoha shinobi. It was a village known for it's parties, gambling, and high security. Any man or woman, civilian or ninja could harmoniously share a drink in this safe haven. Though under the pretenses of sleazy bar and disreputable casinos. Under the flashing lights one is heard to lose themselves in the moment.

That was exactly their mission.

Sasuke Uchiha was still out and about with his team, the Taka, and it was unnerving for the ninja. In order to lift up the spirits of Naruto and Sakura, Tsunade ordered them to a retreat. The requirements were: have a blast and return in three days time.

Upon arriving there was a nagging feeling that this was a horrible idea. . .

Story starts here:

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V

Sakura Haruno found her eyelids heavy as she stirred. There was a gentle fogginess clouding her senses.

Gradually, her ears began to take in the low sound of her lungs heaving in and out.

Her nose couldn't quite place the unusually musky scent that whirled about in the air.

Green eyes peered out from under thick lashes, taking in her surroundings in a frustratingly sluggish manner. It took her a full two minutes to discern that she was not in her own bedroom.

The wall before her was painted in a creamy colored brown. A bedside table stood harmlessly next to the headboard, the maple surface occupied by a plain lamp with an off white shade along with a digital clock. It was at the sight of the clock she surrendered to the tug of her eyelids, sealing themselves willingly. Her inability to distinguish the red blur of the clock proved to her that she was not awake enough yet to deal with the situation she found herself in.

Her conscious swimming in the darkness behind the fleshy-lids was comforting.

Sakura felt herself being lulled back to sleep by the husky breathing that was hot on the nape of her neck. The warmth emitting from skin on her backside and waist was comforting.

That struck a cord somewhere within her, but she couldn't comprehend why. . .

"Hmm," came a soft hum from somewhere close by, reaching her ear.

The side of her head ground into the soft pillow gently, trying to return to the tranquil dreamland in her mind.

There was movement at her stomach, a hand clutched her body, pulling her closer to the warmth behind her. It felt so nice, but Sakura couldn't shake a bizarre nagging feeling.

A soft wet object trailed the skin of her neck and the pink haired woman shuddered with pleasure. The wet thing continued lapping at her skin and it began to tickle.

An innocent giggle escaped her lips at the sensation. That was when it finally clicked into place.

" 'The hell!?" she screamed, abruptly snapping from her daze. She jolted upright, the stale air of the room hitting her exposed flesh as the sheets fell away. The frantic woman comprehended that she was also naked. But that was nothing compared to the surprise she found awaking at her side.

"What's your-- Aw fuck."

Kiba Inuzuka looked mortified as he gawked at the presence of bubblegum pink hair. Glassy green orbs reflected his horror. The pink haired woman's naked upper half was exhibited shamelessly.

It wasn't a bad picture, but the implications of the situation caused the brunette to squeeze his eyes shut and reopen them, as if it was an illusion that would disappear after the ritual. No such luck.

"W-we didn't," whispered Sakura, her rational side begged that it wasn't Kiba that was lying naked at her side.

Kiba pushed himself upright, finding that he wasn't clothed in the slightest. He winced.

"It kinda looks like we did," he countered hesitantly.

The realization was taking a leisurely amount of time to sink in. As the reality of their circumstances seeped in, they gazed incredulously at one another.

"I'm gonna take a shower," decided the kunoichi after a moments thought. She got to her feet, pulling one of the sheets around her body, only to trip over a large lump on the floor. She let out a wail of shock as she collapsed in an unceremonious heap on top of something.

"Are you alright?" questioned Kiba, yanked from his daze. On his hands and knees the startled ninja peered over the edge of the mattress to find Sakura sprawled out over a suddenly awakened Shikamaru Nara, he too lacked in the ways of clothing.

"What the hell?" inquired Shikamaru, jerked from his peaceful sleep. He'd been rudely awakened by something heavy falling on top of him. The first thing he recognized was the sharp pain that nailed his cranium and pounded inside his skull.

His dark eyes focused on the ceiling, the fire detector, the inactive overhead light, and then the somber, tan face of a certain dog nin --who looked utterly at a loss for words, and then his gaze fell to the weight on his chest. It didn't take much to register that the weight was the stripped body of his pink haired colleague, Sakura.

Sakura pushed her, for some reason, extremely heavy body off of the poor man she'd accidentally fallen onto. She was shocked to find Shikamaru's face peering up at her.

"You've gotta be kidding me," she said disbelievingly. She drew herself away from the dark-haired man, cowering in the corner of the room. She pressed her fingertips into her temples, trying to comprehend what the fuck was going on.

"No fucking way!" spat Kiba, incredulous. "A threesome, with you two?!"

"What?" questioned the other man in the room, his eyes shifting between the others.

"I had sex with Kiba and Shikamaru!?" gasped Sakura, staring intently at the small chip in the wooden floor by the biggest toe of her left foot. She felt faint as her skin paled. The dryness of her throat becoming more of an issue, it was beginning to hurt.

Now Shikamaru was fully conscious of his indecent exposure, he ripped at the blanket that was covering the bed, knocking Kiba onto his side. Once he was covered, the genius began to think. Think back to last night. Think back to what brought him to join a threesome with Kiba and Sakura. . . .

Nothing.

It was a big gaping hole.

"How did this happen?" asked Shikamaru, at a loss for any sort of explanation. A rare occasion.

Sakura shook her head deliberately, hands still pressed the sides of her cranium.

"No fucking clue," Kiba pitched in.

Silence.

"We all must have gotten wasted," assumed Shikamaru, his voice steady. As his open palm pressed to his forehead, muffling the thumping pressure in his skull. He felt it was his duty to rationally assess the situation. "I can only remember arriving in Las Vegas and going out to a party. I guess we all must have consumed a LOT of alcoholic beverages and somehow. . .the three of us ended up here and. . ." The rest was obviously from the current state they found themselves in.

"Great going, genius," Kiba said, snorting. "I could have figured that much out."

Shikamaru shot a glare at his partner-in-crime-for-the-night. "Well, I'm only stating the facts so we can figure out what happened, dumbass."

"Screw y--"

A disgruntled laugh came from the corner of the room, drawing the men's eyes to stare bewildered at the pink haired woman.

"It's obvious what happened!" she yelled at them, fury taking over. "You guys tricked me into fucking you!"

"Ha! Like that would happen!" barked the dog nin, laughing disdainfully. "One: why the fuck would I go for someone as flat chested as you?" The woman looked appalled, but Kiba continued. "And two: I definitely wouldn't team up with that smartass over there to do it!" His index finger was outstretched toward the other man, but his gaze hadn't left the flustered kunoichi.

"Kiba, calm down!" snapped Shikamaru, trying to reign in their flaring tempers. "Blaming one another isn't going to solve a damned thing. What we need to do is get dressed and find the others."

Inwardly seething, the two obeyed.

They scanned the floor for their clothing, crawling on their hands and knees. After collecting her clothes Sakura found her shirt shredded, her skirt torn in two, and the fasten of her bra broken off. She could see that it was the mutt's fault as it appeared a wild beast had torn into her clothes.

"Kiba!" she exclaimed, brandishing the remains of the pink fabric. "Look what you did to my outfit!"

"How do you know it was me?" the brunette questioned agitatedly, as he picked up his boxers from the floor.

"It looks like they were attacked by a wild beast!" retorted Sakura angrily.

Shikamaru had just about reached his limit and he'd only been awake for fifteen minutes. With the horrible headache, he simply wanted to jump into the bed and get back to his peaceful sleep.

"Guys," addressed the level headed shinobi. "What did I say about blaming?"

"Pfft," huffed Kiba, annoyed. "Whatever, Mother." He sneered, then turned to Sakura. "You can wear my shirt if you're so goddamn desperate." He threw his T-shirt at the glaring female.

Grimacing she took it, but she noted that it left her bottom half uncovered.

Grudgingly, the men came to the same conclusion.

"Kiba give her your boxers too," commanded Shikamaru coldly.

The kunoichi and the dog nin's jaws dropped open.

"Unless you want to walk around half naked?" he asked Sakura, who looked sickened by the idea.

"Fine," she complied, gritting her teeth. "Hand them over." She held out her hand expectantly toward the brunette.

Grumbling something incoherent, Kiba passed her his underwear.

It took a lot of will power to pull on the dark green boxers over her own black lacey panties. Sakura cringed at the sight of her reflection. Adorned in Kiba's clothing, with her hair mussed, she looked like she'd just fucked a guy and was now leaving in his underwear. Which she was. It made her heart sink, she'd been reduced to a slut in one night.

Kiba was in a similar predicament. He had only his pants on. His broad, sun kissed chest and refined 6 pack was presented boldly for all to bare witness. He had to admit his body was sexy and nothing to be ashamed of, but he'd prefer to have his shirt and boxers on at that moment.

Shikamaru faired the greatest of the three. His clothes were intact, his only drawback was he couldn't find the band for his hair. It left his dark brown locks falling on his shoulders.

"All right," said Shikamaru, feeling that they were set. "Let's head out and find the others." Then he felt the pressure return and added, "But first, I'm getting some aspirin."

The remaining shinobi agreed, harboring headaches of their own.

The group entered the hall. It was just like they were on a mission and being shinobi it should be no problem. . .right?

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~To Be Continued!~

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Arigato for reading! :)

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Next Chapter: I Don't Remember Marrying You!