MWAHAHAHA!! I had to write this when I saw it was Sasuke's birthday. (July 23) My own birthday is in four days! 8D

Well, I hope you all like this! And I hope it's as funny as I'd like to think. ^^' Please read and review!

"SAKURA-CHAN! SAKURA-CHAAAN!!"

"NARUTO, SHUT THE HELL UP AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM!!"

"EEP!! Y-yes, Sakura-chan!"

SLAM!

I glared furiously at my now-closed bedroom door, hoping my idiot best friend could feel it. I'm not a morning person. Especially when I'm being woken up by irritatingly-loud screaming.

I sat up with a huff, chancing a glance at my alarm clock.

5:28. Thirty-two minutes before I usually woke up.

I hate him. I really hate him.

But, I mused, the hopeless fool was my best friend.

I sighed tiredly, sliding my legs off the edge of my bed and standing. I popped my back and cracked my neck, grunting quietly in relief. Since I didn't have a chance in hell of getting back to sleep, I decided to go ahead and start my morning.

I made my way over to my closet, throwing on the first things my hands touched. Black jeans with a loose chain hanging around the waist and an AC/DC Ball Breaker concert tour t-shirt. I tugged on a pair of black ankle socks and my tennis shoes, briefly brushing my hair before I threw my bedroom door open.

Naruto nearly jumped out of his skin when the door slammed against the inside wall of my bedroom.

He wore a black unzipped jacket over a bright orange t-shirt and black pants.

"S-sakura-chan?" the blond stammered. I silenced him with a glare.

"Why did you come screaming in my room at five-thirty in the morning?" I demanded.

"W-well, you always get up at six, so I thought I'd see you when you got up..."

I sighed. My tone lost its edge.

"And why did you want to be here when I woke up?"

"So I could see if you wanted to go get breakfast with me..."

An exasperated smile tugged at my lips. I should have known. How typical of Naruto.

"Fine."

A contagious grin lit up his face, making my own smile widen slightly before disappearing. An annoyed frown claimed my expression as we both walked through our shared apartment.

"But, you do know that every restaurant around here opens at six or six-thirty, right?"

He seemed to freeze in place, answering my question for me. I shook my head incredulously, eyebrow twitching.

"Honestly, Naruto. You can be so dense."

"But you still love me, right?"

I snorted. "Of course I do, you big idiot."

Naruto grinned again and pulled me into a tight hug. I struggled to push him off me, giving up when he gave no signs of relenting. I gratefully sucked in a breath of air when the blond finally released me.

I grabbed the keys from beside the door.

"Let's go."

Naruto and I were extremely close. Nineteen years ago, just a week after I was born, my father left my mother. He yelled at her to disown me, stating that he wanted a son and that we would not settle for a daughter. My mother refused, and he walked out on us without a second thought. I lived alone with my mother after that.

But one day, a month before my seventh birthday, my mother and I saw Naruto getting beat up by a man outside of a store. My mother defended him, and the man left with a nasty insult. We took him to the hospital and found out that his parents had died a year earlier. My mother adopted him, and we became closer than any siblings could ever imagine.

When Naruto and I were both ten, my mother died in a car accident. Since we weren't legally old enough to live on our own, my aunt – though not blood-related – Anko took us in. We lived with her until we turned sixteen, and she married a man named Hatake Kakashi. After that, we bought an apartment and have been living here ever since.

Naruto and I walked down the streets of Konoha, content smiles in place arms slung around each other's shoulders. He and I were one-of-a-kind.

"Ne, Sakura-chan," Naruto spoke up.

I raised an eyebrow at him, waiting for him to continue.

"Hinata-chan and I have been together for two years, now..."

"Yes, thank you for pointing out the obvious. Now that you've said it, I can finally continue on with my life."

He glared playfully at me, and I made a face back. We both laughed.

"Go on," I chuckled after a moment, regaining control. "So, what about it?"

He went bright red, to my surprise.

"W-well, I...I-i, uh..."

"What's gotten into you?" I teased, poking him on the nose. "You're blushing."

Naruto frowned and looked away, scratching behind his head. I backtracked.

"Hey, come on," I murmured. "Don't get all shy on me. What were you about to say?"

His bright blue eyes met mine for barely a second before he looked away again, embarrassment showing clearly on his face.

"You see," he started awkwardly, as if not quite sure how to say it. "I-i was thinking yesterday–"

"You were thinking?! You shouldn't work yourself so hard! You might get hurt!"

Naruto shot me a dry look at my snickers and smirk.

"Haha. Very funny, Sakura-chan."

"Sorry. I won't interrupt again."

"You promise?"

"Yes, now hurry up!"

"Alright..." Naruto took a deep breath, closing his eyes. "I'm going to ask Hinata-chan to marry me," he mumbled.

I halted then and there, gaping at him openly. Naruto cracked an eye open, wincing at my expression.

"I-is it really that bad?" he stammered, seeming to be afraid of my reaction.

I grinned widely, and this time I was the one to squeeze him in an air-tight hug.

"S-sakura-chan! I can't breath!–"

"Oh, you DO have a brain in that empty head of yours!" I exclaimed loudly, earning a few strange looks from people walking by. Some of them even shied away from us.

"S-sa–"

I pulled back, beaming brightly at his face.

"I'm so proud of you, Naruto!" I cheered. He grinned back impishly, small blush intact. "When are you going to ask her?"

"Today!" he replied gleefully.

"We have to go get her!!" I practically shouted, suddenly feeling extremely hyper.

Naruto seemed to feel the same sudden rush of bursting energy, but backpedaled at my words.

"N-not now!" he cried.

"Why not?" I demanded.

A fearful look came into his eyes. I crossed my arms, glaring holes into his head. He swallowed.

"B-because..."

"Because, why?"

"Because, I...b-because I might mess up, or something."

I stared at him in disbelief.

"You're hopeless, Naruto," I deadpanned. "If you don't ask her now, you'll lose your nerve!"

He still looked uncertain, but I snatched his arm.

"We're going now, whether you like it or not."

"B-but, Sakura-chan–"

"No buts!"

He fell silent, head dropping as I nearly dragged him down the sidewalk. We both moved swiftly in the direction of the Hyuga estate, Naruto nervous and myself certain. It took a full eight minutes to walk there, but my pace never slowed. I knocked politely on the door. A moment later, a man – Hyuga Hiashi, I remembered – answered the door.

"Ohayou gozaimasu, Hyuga-sama," I greeted, bowing. When Naruto didn't budge, I yanked him down into a bow as well. The man nodded at us. "Is Hinata-chan awake?"

"Yes," he murmured. "She awoke just a few moments ago. Would you like me to send her out?"

"Hai. Arigatou."

The man gave us another nod and a grunt before closing the door. We waited for a few moments, and Naruto began to squirm.

"Be still!" I hissed.

"But I can't!" he whisper-yelled back. "What am I going to do?!"

"We'll take her to the park, and you can ask her there!"

No sooner than those words left my mouth, the door slid open. There stood shy little Hinata, smiling timidly. She blushed instantly when she saw Naruto.

"O-ohayou, Sakura-chan, Naruto-kun," she stuttered quietly.

"Konichiwa, Hinata-chan," I chirped. Even she seemed surprised by my obvious enthusiasm. "We're going to go get breakfast and go to the park. Wanna come?"

Hinata smiled softly.

"O-of course. Would you like to come in? I have to change, first."

I accepted brightly, and she held the door open for us. I sat on the nice white couch of the Hyuga house, tugging Naruto down beside me. We both watched as Hinata disappeared around a corner. Naruto went into panic-mode as soon as she was out of sight.

"How am I going to do this?!" he wailed.

I slapped a hand over his mouth, hissing for him to keep it down. He repeated his last words in a whisper-yell once I removed my hand.

"You have to be serious about this," I instructed. For the first time in either of our lives, he listened completely to what I was saying. "Don't rush into it; you have to create the atmosphere, first."

He gave me a blank look.

"Creature the atmosphere?" Naruto echoed, clearly not having the slightest clue as to what I meant. "You mean like clouds, and stuff?"

"No!" I groaned. "The atmosphere! The feeling! You have to set the mood!"

A light clicked on in his head.

"Oooh! I get it!"

There's a first time for everything, I guess.

"And you have to be slow about it," I continued. He nodded, full attention on me. "If you suddenly burst out with 'marry me!!', you'll scare her. And then Hinata will faint, and we'll have to run to the hospital and hope that she doesn't go brain dead from the shock."

Okay, so that was stretching it a bit. But if I didn't exaggerate a little (ahem; a LOT) with Naruto, it wouldn't be able to penetrate his thick skull.

He gasped loudly, hands slapping over his mouth. He nodded vigorously. I beamed.

"Good!"

Naruto stared hopelessly at the floor as we waited, hysteric tears pricking the corners of his eyes. He looked about ready to burst into screams and run around in circles until he passed out from the blood rushing to his head. And knowing Naruto, that was exactly what he'd do if Hinata didn't show up soon.

Thankfully, she arrived a couple seconds later.

She came around the corner, shy blush on her face. Hinata wore a light blue t-shirt with 'DaY DrEaMeR' written in dark blue, cream-colored capris, and tan-colored shoes with white socks. She practically screamed 'cute'.

I wondered absently how someone as innocent as Hinata had ended up with someone as idiotic and loud as Naruto. I thought this over as we all left the large house. It was one of the great mysteries of the world, I supposed.

In no time at all, we had arrived at the park.

It was a kind-of-peaceful place with squeals of joy from little kids and barks from playful dogs. Couples walked around everywhere, reminding me yet again that I was still single. That was a bitter wound in itself, but I ignored it. Guys were stupid, anyways.

I sat down on one of the benches, patting the space beside me for Hinata and Naruto to join me. They complied. Naruto sat between us, looking very much uncomfortable. I nudged him, and he jumped.

I sent him a look that said 'Get a move on, already!' and he sent one back tat clearly stated 'I'm trying!'. I rolled my eyes.

"Oh, darn," I stated loudly. "It looks like this bench is too crowded. I'll just go sit on that one over there."

"Y-you don't have to get up, Sakura-chan," Hinata disagreed kindly. "I-i can move–"

"Not an inch," I cut in, effectively cutting off any argument she might have had.

I stood, plopping myself down on the bench four feet to the left. I glared at Naruto and he winced. The blond turned to Hinata.

"H-hinata-chan?" he stammered, grabbing her hands in his. Her face went red.

"N-nar–"

He interrupted her.

"Ah, just hear me out," he mumbled.

Hinata gave a shy nod. Naruto swallowed.

"I...I've been thinking a lot, lately, and I've decided." I smiled, impressed with his stronger tone. You go, Naruto. "Hinata-chan, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me, and it makes me really happy to see you smile."

Hinata's eyes widened, and she seemed speechless. Naruto's hand slipped into is jacket, and I was on the edge of my seat.

"I know this sounds kind of sudden, but I really do love you..."

"I-i love you, too, Naruto-kun," Hinata whispered, smiling softly. Naruto sent her a nervous grin back, squeezing her hand.

"A-and I...well, Hinata-chan..."

Naruto removed his hand from his jacket, something gripped tightly in his hand. I could feel the grin spreading on my face.

"Isshou kimi no soba ni isasete kudasai."

Please let me be by your side for the rest of my life.

Hinata gasped, pearl-white eyes widening. He flicked the small black box in his hand open, revealing a pretty golden ring with a single diamond placed carefully in the center. I could only imagine how he'd saved up the money to buy it.

"Kekkon shite kuremasu ka?"

Will you marry me?

Tears filled Hinata's eyes, and she threw her arms around Naruto, a smile spreading across her lips. He hugged her back hopefully.

"Hai!"

I was grinning like the cashmere cat. Way to go, Naruto. You did it.

Naruto exploded into a cheesy grin, slipping the ring onto Hinata's finger. I clapped loudly and made a whooping applause, earning several more odd looks from the others in the park. Hinata blushed, but smiled nonetheless. I jumped up and yanked them both to their feet.

"Celebration breakfast!" I declared.

We all three laughed – Hinata's giggle being fairly quiet, though – and I threw my arm around Naruto's neck. His arm encircled my own, while Hinata hugged his other arm.

"Congrats, Naruto," I teased, smirking playfully. "You're now officially a pimp."

Hinata went bright red and Naruto barked a laugh.

"Oh, come on, Sakura-chan!" he joked back, winking. "I'm not into incest!"

We all three laughed again at that, making our way out of the park.

"I-is that the only reason we went to the park?"Hinata guessed.

"Yep," I replied smoothly. "And congratulations, you two." I sent a sly smirk at Hinata. "Am I going to be the bride's maid?"

Hinata looked horrified that I would even suggest otherwise.

"O-of course!"

I laughed and Naruto faked a whine.

"Aw, man. Then's who's gonna be my best man?"

I punched his side, sending his a mock glare. He rubbed his injury, failing to appear hurt.

"Oh, Sakura-chan! You wound me!"

Just as we were about to laugh yet again, something slammed into me from behind. I stumbled, nearly falling flat on my face, and Naruto and Hinata staggered back. A person latched onto my left arm, squeezing me in a death grip. What the hell?!

My head whipped to side so I could tell him off, but my words died in my mouth.

Gripping onto my arm was none-other-than the famous teenage movie star, Uchiha Sasuke.

I stared.

He sent me a dark look.

"Quit staring and pretend to be my girlfriend," he hissed under his breath.

Wait. What?

"Come again?" I asked blankly.

He glared.

"Pretend to be my girlfriend," he repeated in irritation.

"...why?"

I didn't notice Naruto and Hinata. In fact, Sasuke was walking very fast. I think we left them behind...

Sasuke glared over his shoulder.

"If you don't, I'll be attacked by them."

I glanced back, paling when I saw a gigantic crowd of fangirls pursuing us. (Well, pursuing him.) My head snapped back forward and I plastered on a painful smile.

"Oh," I said brightly, acting as if I had said something completely different. "Well, I pity you. I know your pain."

He raised an eyebrow at me as we continued to walk, obviously not expecting my reaction. I sent him a look that spelled out an annoyed 'Really?'

"What– did you think I was going to squeal over you, too?" I asked dryly. I snorted. "If I did that, I'd be a hypocrite. But, seriously. People like that need to get a life."

Sasuke smirked. He actually smirked.

"That just makes things easier," he murmured, looking forward with his smirk still intact. "Just pretend to be my girlfriend for an hour or two, and I won't get mauled. I'll even pay you for your 'services'. It's a win-win situation."

"Not for a couple hours," I disagreed. "My brother and best friend just got engaged, and I'm taking them out for the day."

He seemed surprised at my answer.

"I'll give you double if you bring me along."

"...how much is double?"

"Five hundred bucks."

"Deal."

He smirked.

"Can I at least get my friends, first?" I asked. He glanced down at me.

"Where are they?" he inquired. "I had the impression that they were with you."

"They were," I stated dryly. "Now they're back there."

Sasuke grimaced.

"We go back and get them, or I leave you alone with all those fangirls," I threatened. He glared.

"Fine."

Sasuke halted, pulling me back in the direction we had come from. Thankfully, Naruto was dragging Hinata in a frantic run towards us.

"SAKURA-CHAN!!" he yelled.

I clocked him in the back of the head.

"Quiet!" I hissed.

"Ow, Sakura-chan!" the blond whined, gripping his head. Hinata patted the top of his head uncertainly.

"He's your brother?" Sasuke retorted in disbelief, one eyebrow raised.

"Adopted brother," I corrected.

His eyebrow dropped back down, as if that single answer explained everything. He yanked me back in the other direction, and I saw that the fangirls were approaching. I could even hear their squeals from here. I grabbed Naruto's arm, and in result, both he and Hinata were dragged after me.

"Sakura-chan, what's going on?!" Naruto demanded.

"Keep your voice down!" I snapped. He winced, and repeated more quietly. "He's going to pay me to act as his girlfriend so that his fangirls don't get him."

"WHAT?!?"

WHAM!

"OW!!"

At my scorching glare, he lowered his voice again.

"Why?!"

I shrugged indifferently, still being led.

"Because I'm apparently the only thing on two legs around that hasn't tried to rape him."

I could feel Sasuke's glare on me, but I ignored it. Naruto laughed loudly, and even Hinata giggled.

"Ne, Imouto-chan, how much is he paying you?"

Naruto liked to call me 'Imouto-chan' even though I was older than him. (My birthday is March 28th, and his is October 10th.)

"Five hundred for the day."

Naruto face-planted on the sidewalk, bringing poor little Hinata-chan with him. She landed awkwardly on his back, face flaming red. Sasuke paused, arching an eyebrow blankly at the two. Naruto scrambled back to his feet, dragging Hinata along again, and gaped at Sasuke.

"Just who are you?!" he whisper-yelled.

"Hn. Uchiha Sasuke."

And just like that, it seemed to click in Naruto's head.

"You're Uchiha Sasuke?!"

I sent him a searing glare, ordering him to be quiet for the thousandth time. Sasuke grunted emotionlessly, slowing his pace as the fangirls began to fall back with screeches of 'HUH?!? Who's that girl?!?' I smirked smugly to myself. Getting back at fangirls – and fanboys – was one of my life's missions.

"Dude, your movie In The Eyes of Darkness kicked major ass!"

I agreed. In that movie, Sasuke had played a shadowy character that could use dark magic and read minds. Sure, he was the bad guy, and sure, he died at the end, but that was still one hell of a movie. It was rated R for extreme violence, blood and gore, and cursing.

Sasuke let out a quiet 'hn', smirking to himself. I rolled my eyes. Stupid male pride.

"Naruto, if you start screaming about how much you love his movies, people are going to get suspicious," I said sternly, glaring at him from the corner of my eye. "They'll expect us to already know him, so put a cork in it!"

Naruto sucked in his mouth obediently, hanging his head. Sasuke snorted.

"Dobe," he muttered. "You're taking orders from your younger adopted sister? That's pathetic."

A vein in my forehead twitched. I didn't look at him as I spoke (growled) my next words.

"Oi, I'll have you know that I'm older than him by seven months," I ground out, glaring at the sidewalk ahead of me. People seemed to veer off at my deadly aura. "And what the hell is that supposed to mean?! This 'younger adopted sister' can kick your stuck-up little ass."

Sasuke's eyebrows shot up. Oh yeah. I bet he wasn't expecting my language. Well NEWSFLASH Uchiha Sasuke: my language makes sailors faint from shock.

"Is that so?" he taunted.

He was smirking at me! The bastard was SMIRKING at me!! His ass is going down as soon as I get my payment!

"Yes, it is," I hissed.

"I don't believe you."

My eye twitched.

"You just wait until I get my five hundred," I snarled. "Then your ass will. Be. Mine."

"Hn. So you are just like all the other fangirls."

Wait. Hold up. What'd he just say?

...

...

...!!

What the– oh HELL no!!

I sent him a particularly vicious glare, burning big fiery fucking holes into his chicken-ass little head.

"In your fucking dreams!!" I growled in a low, deadly tone.

He snorted.

"How about I throw you to them now?" I spat. "I'm sure they'd love to violate you in every imaginable way."

His eyes narrowed, and he glanced at me from the corner of his eyes.

"You wouldn't."

"Oh, but I would."

"Trust me," Naruto snickered, sly grin stretched across his face. "She would."

Sasuke glared at me.

"...hn."

I rolled my eyes.

"Where are we supposed to be going?" he muttered.

Oh. I'd forgotten about that. Whoops.

I smiled over at Naruto and Hinata.

"Idiot, Hina-chan, where do you two wanna go?" I asked.

Naruto flushed while Hinata giggled. Even Sasuke smirked.

"Ichiraku!" my hopeless adopted brother shouted.

We received more stares from the people around us. I groaned. Sasuke raised an eyebrow at me.

"What's wrong with Ichiraku?" the black-haired movie star inquired.

"Let me guess. You've never been there. No, wait. Of course you've never been there. If you'd been to Ichiraku a single day in your entire life, you would've already met Naruto by now."

Sasuke seemed to get the point.

"He goes there often?"

"Every. Single. Day."

"So can we go?!" Naruto begged, childish grin glued to his face. I scowled.

"No."

He looked like he'd had a stroke.

"WHAT?!?"

WHAM!

"OW!! ITAI! ITAI!"

Sasuke grunted, eyebrow twitching at Naruto's screams.

"Can it, baka, before I shove my fist down your throat!" I threatened. Once again, Naruto immediately went silent. "We are not going to Ichiraku's so pick somewhere else!"

"But Sakura-ch–"

"No!"

Naruto shrunk back, 'eep'ing quietly.

"Pick. Some. Where. ELSE."

"Uh...h-how about, um...uh...er...ah...Hinata-chan, what do you want?"

Hinata went red, pressing her pointer fingers together shyly and blinking with wide eys at the ground.

"U-um...wh-what about A-akikyo's Grille and C-café?" the dark-blue-haired girl suggested meekly.

"That's a GREAT idea, Hinata-chan!!"

"Sure."

"Hn."

"Never been there, either?"

"Hn."

It figured. A movie star wouldn't go to such 'low-grade' restaurants. Damn them all.

"I'm buying," I announced, sending a sharp look at Naruto. "But you are not going to order more than two things, or you can pay for it, yourself."

"Aw, but Sakura-chan!" the blond whined. "I'm not full unless I eat my rameeeen!!"

"NO!"

Naruto jumped, and Sasuke seemed to be irritated by my sudden yell. Well, they can go suck it, because I already have to struggle to get enough money to continue going to college.

"Naruto, you eat fifteen bowls of ramen at one meal! I'm not fucking rich, so if you want to gorge yourself with food, go find your own fucking money!"

"Eheh...s-sorry, Sakura-chan...?"

Suck-up.

"You seriously eat that much in one meal?' Sasuke asked incredulously. He shook his head, muttering to himself about 'crazy people' and 'dobe'.

And then, all of a sudden, something bright and white flashed in my eyes. I stumbled back. Wh-what the–

"Uchiha-san!"

FLASH!!

"Hey, Uchiha-san! Over here!"

FLASH!!

Sasuke cursed under his breath, tightening his grip on my arm.

"Run," he murmured.

And so I did. If being dragged can be considered running.

We both flew down the street as fast as we could, desperately trying to avoid the paparazzi. Cameras flashed everywhere, and I was pretty sure I'd be permanently blinded once this was over. Sasuke kept his hand clenched around my arm as we hurtled around person after person, not bothering to excuse himself when he shoved some of them out of the way.

"MOVE it!" he growled, pushing his way threw a dense crowd.

I stumbled countless times on people's feet, receiving cries and shock and anger in return. Sasuke whipped around a corner, yanking me after him, and suddenly pulled us into an alleyway.

"Get down," he instructed.

I crouched behind the only trash can in the alley, face heating up when I felt him come in behind me.

Whoa. Let me rephrase that.

I crouched behind the only trash can in the alley, face heating up when I felt his chest against my back as he crouched behind me.

There. That sounds a bit less...dirty.

He placed a hand on the top of my head, forcing me to duck down so I wouldn't be seen. His chin rested on my shoulder, and could feel his breath my ear. My face was flaming. I was getting a bit uncomfortable.

We crouched for a few moments, the only sound being our ragged breathing. My ear was starting to tickle, and my insides were squirming. Oh god. What a time for my hormones to kick in.

Bad thoughts invaded my mind, poisoning my head with dirty images.

Ack! Get them away!!

I could have died when Sasuke pressed up against me even further. He went completely still and his breathing quieted. I held my breath.

Seconds later, there was the sound of many rushed footsteps dashing by the alley. A ton of voices were calling 'Uchiha-san?!' or 'Sasuke-san?!'. The noises disappeared quickly, but we waited on edge.

After a moment, I could hear his labored breathing against my ear again. I shivered, and I felt his body tense behind me.

Well, the shit has officially hit the fan.

"Sakura...?"

Who did he know my– oh, wait. Naruto yelled it a few times.

"Wh-what?"

Damn my wavering voice.

And then suddenly, his breathing was no longer on my ear. It was on my cheek.

My heart skipped about a thousand beats, and my throat dried up.

I felt his nose skin the side of my face, and I nearly had a heart attack – if I haven't had one already – when he seemed to be leaning over me. His hand found my left arm again, and I was suddenly being pulled backwards to face him. Something bumped against my hip–

HOLY. FUCKING. SHIT.

I jumped a good ten feet into the air, toppling over the trash can awkwardly and landing on my head on the other side. I cradled my head, eyes watering in the corners, and hurriedly sat up. I stared at Sasuke in horror, my face on fire.

That better NOT have been what I think it was.

His dark eyes were clouded as he regarded me silently, lips slightly parted to allow himself to breath easier. His face was unreadable.

I think my soul has officially been ripped out of my body and flung into the sky.

It WAS what I thought it was.

That thought alone made my face go so dark red, it was arguable whether or not it was actually red.

Kami-sama must REALLY like to fuck with me. Nothing good could come from two horny teenagers alone in an alleyway who were thinking X-rated dirty thoughts. NOTHING.

"W-we should probably go," I stammered, wincing at my stutter.

His eyes flickered, but he said nothing.

"Uh, S-sasuke?"

He stood up smoothly, offering a hand down to me. I blinked and stared at it for a moment before taking it. His hand closed over mine, and I suddenly got the feeling that I shouldn't have taken his offer.

He pulled me up quickly, alright. Yeah, he pulled me up right into him.

I slammed into his chest, momentarily shocked. And what does he do in my moment of hesitation? He grabs my chin and kisses me. The bastard.

I stared wide-eyed in shock and his lips moved against mine, unable to think straight or move a muscle. I felt those cursed hormones creeping up on me again, and jumped slightly when his hand brushed over mine softly. His lips trailed down to beneath my left ear, smirking against the skin before giving it a light nip and suck.

He pulled back, a cocky smirk on his smug little (hot) face and he chuckled at my expression. Sasuke stuffed his hands in his pockets and strolled right past the pale-white-statue than is yours truly.

To my extreme horror, I found a hickey where he had bit me.

"I may be of need of your services again," the black-haired male murmured in amusement before stepping out of the alley and walking away.

I blinked.

...what?

What the hell had just happened?

Come to think of it, my hand was clenched around something...

I lifted my hand absently and opened it, staring blankly at the contents. In my hand lay five one-hundred-dollar bills.

What the...

Wait.

WHAT THE HELL?!?

I bristled in fury, glaring angrily at the spot he'd been in moments ago.

"BASTARD!!" I screeched after him, hoping that he'd go deaf from it.

I screamed in lethal fury and kicked the trash can, huffing and yelling curses. In my fit of rage, it took a few moments to register Naruto and Hinata peeking around the corner.

"Uh...S-sakura-chan?"

"WHAT?!?"

Naruto cowered, looking as if he was about to wet himself. Then, something caught my eye. I mustered up all of my self-control, managing to retain myself to a deathly growl.

"Naruto, where did you get a hundred-dollar bill?!" I hissed.

He paled and started shaking.

Then, something in my pocket vibrated. I took out my phone, blinking stupidly at the screen.

One New Txt Message
Unknown Number

I flipped it open, pressing a button to show the message.

The dobe gave me your number. I'll see you tomorrow in front of the alleyway for another 500.

...

...

...

Blink.

...

...

...

"AAAUUUGH!! YOU BASTARD!!!"