Coffee Conundrum

By: Captain Sway

Fandom: NCIS

Characters: Anthony DiNozzo, Leroy Jethro Gibbs

Pairing: None

Status: Complete, Beta'd

AN: So, I know it's a prop, but has anyone noticed the way Mark Harmon handles the coffee cup? Well, I have, and so this little plot bunny was born. And who else would be brave (or stupid) enough to do something like this other than Tony? xD Enjoy!

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Tony's curiosity was always insatiable. That's why he went through people's things. He had to know more about them, and that meant going through their possessions, seeing what they like, who they know, what they owned, and everything else. Kate would never understand; she just got mad about him going through her personal items. Well, if it's there...

He learned at a young age that you could learn a lot from other people's possessions. That's how he knew that his father was cheating on his mother for years, probably even before he was born. His father kept receipts of everything, and the jewelry listed on those flimsy pieces of paper weren't in his mother's jewelry boxes. He knows. He checked.

Tony would look through anything, that's what made him an investigator. Hell, he's looked through trash, body remains, Kate's purse... He would even look through the president's desk if he was ever given the opportunity. But there was one place he would never look.

Gibbs' desk.

That seemed like blasphemy. Sure, he would look at things -on- the desk, but the drawers seemed to radiate something that said "Back the hell off, DiNozzo." Strangely enough, it was in Gibbs' voice. It's not like he was interested in them right now anyway. What he really, truly wanted to take a peek into was sitting right in plain sight. Gibbs' 'Hot Coffee' coffee cup.

Tony's investigating skills went along with his curiosity. His imagination ran rampant, but usually it was more out-of-the-box theories that always happened to be true. Tony studied people, watched things, went through stuff. Lately, he noticed something about Gibbs' coffee cup, and true to his spirit, he had come up with a theory and wanted to investigate.

When he first met Gibbs, he noticed the man drank an unusual amount of coffee. Like, if you gave an ADHD kid that amount of coffee, they'd be dead by the end of the week. After nearly three years working with the man, he came up with an idea that didn't sound too farfetched. He knew that Gibbs drank his coffee black, he's seen the man order and drink actual coffee. However, it's black coffee. Not like Tony's hazelnut latte with cream and sugar, topped with whipped cream that he usually gets at Starbucks. So, why did Gibbs swirl his coffee? He didn't have anything to mix. Tony thought about it for quite some time. Was it a compulsion? Was he checking out how much liquid was left in the cup?

He couldn't come up with an answer for that particular situation. So he continued to watch. Even when Gibbs was shaking around his cup, it was jerky. Something you definitely wouldn't do to a cup that had potentially hot liquid in it. So, Tony's overactive imagination came up with the theory: Gibbs didn't drink as much coffee as he liked people to think he did. He knew that Gibbs did drink coffee, but how much exactly? How often?

Tony looked back on the time when Kate knocked into Gibbs' and made him spill his drink. Oh god, that was horrible. He had been so scared out of his mind that he was frozen on the spot, in ready-to-escape mode. Kate looked like her world had turned upside down and her paddle was stuck in the mud - on the other side of the creek. He also remembered something about McGee... what did the Probie mutter? Something about Rule 23? Rule 23... Rule 2-... Right: Never mess with a marine's coffee.

The bastard would do something like freak out his team by acting as if he couldn't function without coffee. Keep them on their toes.

Tony nibbled the inside of his bottom lip and narrowed his eyes. He looked at his computer and then glanced back at the coffee cup. He raised his wrist to look at his watch and then made a quick peek over to MTAC. His view went back to the cup on Gibbs' desk and he nodded. Rising to his feet, Tony prowled carefully over to the ominous piece of metal. Stopping in front of it, he took a quick look around the bullpen to make sure no one, especially Gibbs, was around or looking at him. He raised his hand, wiggled his fingers and grabbed the cup of coffee.

It was light, surprisingly so. If he hadn't suspected it, he would be extremely shocked. Tony shook the cup around a bit and didn't hear the tell tale of liquid. Gathering up his courage, he opened the lid and took a peek inside.

His head reeled forward.

"What the hell do you think you're doing DiNozzo?" Gibbs' voice wasn't quite a shout, but it still rung through his ears as if it was through a bullhorn. Gibbs snatched the cup and lid out of Tony's hands and put them back on his desk.

"Nothing boss, just checking up a theory," Tony tried to defend his actions. Gibbs stood in front of him and stared as if he was crazy. "Boss... your coffee cup is empty."

"Yeah DiNozzo?" came Gibbs' terse reply.

"And it showed no signs of actually having coffee in it," he tried to continue.

Gibbs simply raised his eyebrows as if daring him to say anything.

"Boss...it's empty...." Tony weakly tried to say his theory, but with that glare coming his way, he sighed internally and gave up. "Yes boss, sorry boss." He turned around and walked to his desk as quickly as possible. Gibbs glared after him for a couple moments and then settled at his own desk, putting the lid back on the cup.

Tony sat down and went back to his computer. After a few minutes, he paused. Tony glared back at Gibbs and then smiled. Leaning back in his chair, he put his hands behind his head and called out to Gibbs. "I knew it. You're a sneaky son of a gun Gibbs."

Gibbs, for his part, actually didn't look angry. Instead, he gave a small grin and replied, "Yeah DiNozzo, I know."