Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I haven't written anything Harry Potter in a couple of years, but the new movie (which had one squeal-worthy scene between my favorite couple) inspired me. This takes place between the Order of the Phoenix and the Half-Blood Prince. Enjoy! Thank you, Lisa, for the awesome beta and title help.

Of Nymphs and Wolves

by Kristen Elizabeth

The heart is the only instrument that when broken, still works. - T. E. Kalem

There wasn't a lot of blood dripping from Tonks's nose, but from the way Lupin reacted to seeing her limping into the front hallway of 12 Grimmauld Place with Bill Weasley's help, one would have thought she was on death's door.

"What happened?" Lupin thundered down the rickety staircase. His characteristically calm demeanor was gone when he reached them and noticed her swollen lip and bruised cheek. "Bill?" he demanded.

The oldest of Arthur and Molly's children ignored the accusation in Lupin's tone. Although his relationship with Fleur was very new, he imagined he'd feel the same sort of panic if he saw her injured in such a way as Tonks had been. "We had a bit of a run-in with..."

Tonks cut him off. "It's nothing I won't be able to mend on my own." She smiled at Bill as much as she could with her broken nose and split lip. "Thanks for having my back, mate."

"Any time," he assured her. Upon catching the mounting look of utter fear and frustration on Lupin's face, Bill made the quick decision to escape. "Well, I should be getting back to the Burrow. You know how Mum gets these days when one of us is unaccounted for. Tonks..." He offered her a grin of sympathetic support. "Take care of yourself."

"I'll try," was all she would promise.

"Remus." Even at hearing his name, the older man's eyes never left Tonks's battered face. Bill shook his head. "Later, then."

With a pop, Bill disappeared, leaving Tonks and Lupin alone in the empty, dusty house that had once been home to the noble Black family. Now, after Sirius Black's untimely death, ownership of the house was in a state of limbo. Would Harry Potter inherit his godfather's childhood home as Sirius had wished or would it revert to a less desirable branch of the Black family tree?

No one, not even Dumbledore, was sure just yet. But in the meantime, Lupin continued to live in the well-hidden rooms where only weeks earlier his best friend in the world had resided along with him.

It was, despite frequent visitors from other members of the Order of the Phoenix, a very lonely existence.

"If you don't mind..." Tonks's unusually soft voice seemed to echo off the walls. "I'll just wash up and be on my way, as well." She paused. "I told Bill not to bring me here, but he thought..."

"He thought what?" Lupin asked when she stopped short.

For the first time since she'd arrived, Tonks looked straight at him. "You do realize that most of the Order believes we're shagging like mad every chance we get, yes?"

Lupin's eyes grew wide; it might have amused her under different circumstances. "They...what? Why? How? I mean...we don't...we aren't..."

"Bloody hell, Remus." Hot tears stung her eyes as her hair faded from a brilliant pink to a sickly lavender. "You don't have to act as though shagging me would be the worst thing you could do." Before he could form a reply, Tonks brushed past him and started up the stairs. "I won't be a minute," she assured him. "And then you can have your peace and quiet back."

In the safety of the bathroom, Tonks shrugged out of her long maroon leather coat, surprised at how much the simple movement made her right side burn. She must have fractured a rib during the short encounter with a masked Death Eater on the fringes of Diagon Alley. If not for Bill's arrival, she might not have walked away as relatively unscathed as she had.

Tonks turned on the faucet and splashed cold water on her face, making the half-dried blood on her face drip down her chin. She looked a fright, she thought as she glaced up at the cracked mirror over the sink. Gripping the porcelain sides of the basin, she let out a chuckle that turned into a choked sob.

No wonder he didn't want her.

When Tonks looked back up, she startled to see Lupin's reflection in the glass, standing just behind her. "You could have knocked," she said, her ribs searing with each word.

"I came to help." She closed her eyes, letting his voice soothe her if only for just a moment. When he reached for her hand, Tonks slowly turned to face him, opening her eyes slowly. "Will you let me?" Lupin asked.

She let her silence answer for her. Lupin reached into the inside pocket of his threadbare coat and withdrew his wand. "Episkey." With a sudden burst of pain, her nose straightened and the cut on her lip closed up.

"Thanks," Tonks whispered.

After pocketing his wand, Lupin wet a washcloth and began gently wiping the blood from her face. A moment passed before he spoke again. "Tell me what caused this."

"I was...distracted," she admitted. "Caught off guard." She paused. "It won't happen again."

"Perhaps I should have clarified." Lupin set the stained cloth aside, but returned his hand to her cheek, as though checking her face for any further injury. Tonks's lashes fluttered at the feeling of his warm, rough hand on her skin. "Who caused this?"

She never wanted him to stop touching her. "Even if I knew, why would it matter?" She looked him straight in the eye as she reached up to cover his hand with hers against her cheek. "I don't need to be avenged, Remus. I'm a big girl; I can fight my own battles."

A shadow crossed his face. "Sometimes I forget just how young you are," he murmured.

His words were like a bucket of ice water being dumped over her head. Numbly, Tonks pushed away from him, backing up until there was a safe distance between them. "And sometimes," she began, "I forget just how thick you are." Her ribs were on fire with each heavy breath she took. "If you don't want to be with me, Remus, that's fine. It's the wrong bloody choice, but it's yours to make. But what you can't do...what you absolutely cannot do is give me even the slightest bit of hope. Don't touch me...don't worry about me...don't come to my rescue. Because it hurts, Remus..." Every word sent a knife of pain through her ribcage and into her lungs. "It hurts too much...when you stop. And you always, always stop just short of..." Tonks closed her eyes. "...everything."

The speech had sapped the last of her strength and robbed her of what little breath she could manage to take. Her hand flew out to grab the wall as her knees gave out from under her and she collapsed to the tile floor.

Through the fog of near unconsciousness, she heard him call her name. "Tonks!" She felt weightless as his arms slipped under her body and she was lifted off the ground. She could feel his heart beating against her ear, so much faster than normal. He smelled of fresh laundry and something else. Something distinctly Lupin.

His lips touched her forehead. Just before the darkness claimed her, she heard him whisper, "Please don't give up on me, Dora."

She was only unconscious for a few seconds, but they were the longest moments of Lupin's life. As he carried her into the nearest bedroom...which just happened to be his own...her dark lashes lifted and she looked up at him.

"I'm...all right," Tonks panted, clearly in pain. "You don't...have to..."

"Don't talk," Lupin gently ordered. "It hurts to talk, doesn't it?" She dragged her full lower lip between her teeth, a reluctant affirmative answer if ever he'd seen one. "So..." Lupin laid her down on his bed with great care. Once she was settled, he looked her straight in the eye. "Don't."

She tried to scowl at him. "You never...want...to talk."

"Why don't we worry about healing your injuries first, before we rehash old arguments." Lupin sat on the edge of the bed, keeping a careful distance between their bodies. "Should I take you to St. Mungo's?"

"No." Tonks began to sit up. "I'm perfectly..." Her protest died as a look of agony came over her face. She instinctively grabbed her right side.

Lupin willed his hands to stay still. If he reached for her again, as he badly wanted to, he was afraid he'd never be able to let her go. "I'm certainly no expert, but it seems as though you might have a broken rib."

Tonks glared at him. "Brilliant, Professor." Supporting herself on one hand, she used the other to begin working at the top button of her form-fitting black blouse.

Lupin swallowed heavily when she managed to get the button undone and the notch of her throat lay exposed. "What are you doing?"

"Taking off...my shirt," she replied, as though she thought him mad for having to ask. "How can my...ribs be fixed...if..." She struggled with the next button. "...if they can't be seen?"

He had no reply. In fact, he was frozen in place as Tonks slowly, but steadily unbuttoned her top, paving a pale road of skin down to her waist. When she began to shrug her arms out of the sleeves, Lupin suddenly forgot how to breathe.

Black lace trimmed with a hot pink ribbon...what lay beneath the blouse was less of a bra and more of a mental torture device. How was a man expected to keep his right mind with such a flimsy garment inadequately covering such incredible...assets?

Apparently unaware of his silent anguish, Tonks tossed her blouse aside and lowered herself back down to the bed. With one hand, she began exploring her ribcage, searching for the most painful spot. Her actions might have been necessary, but the movements she was making also served to display her half-naked torso in such a way that made Lupin's mouth go dry.

When she finally found it, she dug her teeth into her lower lip. "Right here." She drew in a sharp breath as she pressed on the spot again. "Remus?"

He blinked. "Yes?"

Tonks blew out the breath she'd just taken. "My wand's...still in the bathroom." When he said nothing, she added, "I can't heal...myself."

Once again, Lupin blinked, only this time he actually snapped to attention. "Right, of course! Sorry." With his own wand, he pointed at the area she indicated, channeling all of his strength into focusing on the spell and not the way in which her skin resembled fresh cream.

It wasn't at all easy.

"Are you certain you wouldn't just rather drink some Skele-Gro?" he asked a second later.

"Please...don't make me...laugh." Tonks smiled softly. "I trust you, Remus."

Somehow, that was just what he needed to hear. With a smooth flick of his wand, he cast a stronger form of the healing charm he'd used on her nose and lip. A moment later, her body relaxed and the tight look of pain on her face all but disappeared.

Without thinking, Remus reached out and laid a hand on her ribcage, searching for the sore spot. "How does it feel now?"

She didn't answer. She was staring at the place where his fingers lay on her body. When she did finally look up at him, there was hope in her eyes. Her hair slowly brightened back to its usual vivid pink. "Feels right," she whispered.

He should have removed his hand. He should have stood up and put as much distance between them as possible. But he couldn't. The plain and simple fact was that he wanted to be the one who got to touch her like this. He wanted to heal all of her injuries, even the ones he himself had inflicted on her heart in his attempts to protect her.

He wanted to give her everything.

Perhaps she had cast a spell of her own because suddenly Lupin could not hear a single one of the voices in the back of his mind that always told him that he was too old, too poor, too dangerous and that he needed to stay away from Nymphadora Tonks.

All he could hear was one very clear voice demanding that he kiss her until neither one of them could remember their own names.

And so...he did.

Lupin kissed like a man who had just had a death sentence lifted from his shoulders and Tonks wasn't complaining.

From the moment his lips captured hers, nearly knocking the wind out of her, Tonks's heart had been racing in sheer joy. It was everything she'd wanted, to know that Lupin desired her, maybe even loved her. Kissing him back, she felt like she'd just received the greatest gift of her life and would never need another as long as she lived.

Her hands came up to cup his face; her fingers caressed the old scars on his cheeks. He flinched slightly, but she didn't stop, wouldn't stop until he understood that she didn't revile the evidence of his condition. Rather, she reveled in them because they were part of Remus Lupin. Loving him meant loving everything about him, including the wolf.

The scars weren't just limited to his face, she learned after managing to strip him of his jumper and white shirt. His body was thin, but not without a good layer of muscles, which rippled as he held himself up over her.

Still, it didn't take much effort for Tonks to reverse their positions. When he was flat on his back, she perched herself on his waist and looked down at him. With their eyes locked, she reached behind her back and unhooked her bra.

His chest rose with a deeply drawn breath as she tossed the black and pink garment aside. There was no shame in being nude in front of Remus; she wanted him to see all of her just as badly as she wanted to see all of him.

Lupin shook his sandy head against the pillows. "I can't think of a single thing I've done in my life that was good enough to deserve you."

Planting her hands on either side of his head, Tonks leaned down to kiss him softly, but deeply. "And I wish you could see what I do when I look at you, Remus."

She gave him no chance to reply; she kissed him again, harder this time, to which he responded with equal fervor. With her soft chest pressed against his hard torso, they rolled until he was laying over her once again.

Lupin broke the kiss only long enough to look her in the eyes as his hesitant, yet inquisitive hand reached for the top button on her leather trousers.

"Yes," she answered his unspoken question. "I've been ready for this."

Outside the protected walls of 12 Grimmauld Place, the sun had almost completely set, casting London into the dark blue of twilight.

Inside, Remus Lupin was in hell.

Oh, it had been incredible, everything he'd always suspected it would be...passionate and powerful. Being with Nymphadora had reminded him why his life was worth living, even at its hardest and darkest. Up until the very second their bodies had joined, he couldn't remember a single reason why he'd been denying them both this intimacy that they clearly craved.

But all of those reasons had come flooding back in a great, crushing tidal wave of guilt, anger and remorse the moment he'd realized...she'd never been with a man before.

One tiny whimper had nearly been his undoing, the smallest indication of the discomfort she was feeling as he ended her innocence. Her brightly painted nails had clutched his shoulders; her flushed face had screwed up ever so slightly as she braced herself against the pain.

Lupin had frozen in place, terrified to move lest he make it worse for her. "Dora...my god..." he'd panted. "You should have told me..."

Her lashes had lifted revealing wet eyes. "If I had...you never would have touched me at all."

He'd hung his head, breathing in the vanilla scent of her warm skin. "I had no idea, I swear. I just thought...I can't have been your first choice for this."

"For such a smart man, you really can be the king of dunces." Tonks had shifted beneath him, drawing him deeper inside. Her breath had caught in her throat, but it hadn't seemed like she'd been in as much pain as before. "I've been waiting for someone worth waiting for."

Lupin had swallowed heavily. "Why me?"

"Because."

A moment had passed. He'd frowned. "Yes?"

"That's all." She'd shrugged her shoulders with a small smile. "Just because."

It hadn't really been answer, but the way she'd moved beneath him again, wordlessly encouraging him to move with her had effectively ended the conversation.

Now that it was over and she lay dozing against his chest, the euphoria of making love to Nymphadora was beginning to be replaced by all of the usual concerns and complexities.

His age. His standing in the wizarding world. His furry little problem that was anything but little. Lacking funds, lacking prospects, lacking even so much as a home of his own...and now he'd gone and taken something precious from her.

He might have seriously started to hate himself if she hadn't suddenly stirred against him and murmured his name as her lashes slowly lifted. Her lazy smile made him hungry for her again...which only made him angrier at himself for taking advantage of her the first place.

Tonks pressed a kiss against his bare skin. "I think we're brilliant at this," she quipped.

Lupin swallowed heavily. "How would you know?" The words came out before he could stop them; immediately, her impish grin faded away. He refused to look at her eyes. If he looked at her eyes, he would never say what he needed to say. "We shouldn't have done this, Dora."

Her body trembled against his. "Would you be saying that if I hadn't been a virgin?"

Once again, he spoke without stopping to think. "Your first time should have been special."

When she sat up, clutching the covers to her chest, Lupin knew he'd gone too far. But maybe that was what they both needed, a hard dose of reality in order to navigate out of the waters they'd made murky in the space of a single, glorious afternoon.

Nymphadora had been surprising him since the day they'd met, when she'd flat-out told him that she'd always fancied him whenever she'd seen pictures of him and Sirius and James Potter that had been taken during their Hogwarts years.

Her passionate persistence of him had been nothing less than shocking. Never in his wildest dreams would he have ever imagined that a young, beautiful witch would ever pursue him when she was surrounded by equally young, brave men like the eldest Weasley brothers. But she had, with a tenacity and tirelessness that had slowly mended so many old wounds on his heart.

And now, just when he expected her to come out fighting, with curses on the tip of her tongue, she suprised him once again by slowly nodding.

"You're right." Tonks looked down at the rumpled sheet she had bunched up in her hand. "I deserve better than this. I deserve someone who would be holding me right now, telling me how much he loves me." With each word, the anger in her voice grew and her hair morphed from bubble-gum pink to flaming red. "And how utterly grateful he is that I chose to give him such an incredible one-time-only gift!"

Practically yelling now, Tonks threw off the covers and was only seconds away from sliding out of bed when Lupin suddenly reached for her wrist.

There was a war being waged between his heart and his head, but right then, his heart won a huge battle.

"I'm sorry." He lowered his lips to her palm, giving it a soft kiss. "I'm sorry, Dora. I am grateful. More than you will ever, ever know."

All he could see was her beautifully sculpted back rising and falling with each breath. "I won't apologize for waiting." The red in her hair suddenly took on a definite pink tinge. "I always wanted to be able to say that I was in love with my first lover...and now I can."

Lupin closed his eyes briefly. She'd gone and said it, put it all out in the open. She loved him. There was no way to convince himself now that she'd only been seeking physical release, no way for him to dismiss the afternoon's events as anything less than lovemaking in the truest sense of the term.

For whatever reason, Nymphadora Tonks loved him. And since despite all the reasons why he shouldn't, he was rapidly falling in love with her right back...they had a huge problem on their hands.

Lupin took a breath. "I don't have a Galleon to my name..."

She cut him off with an exaggerated sigh. "Bloody hell, Remus! Are you ever going to get it through your thick skull that I couldn't care less about..."

"But..." He held up a hand to stop her. "I feel like the richest man in Britain when I'm with you."

Tonks snuck a glance back at him from over her shoulder. "That's a good start," she admitted. "But are you also convinced that it doesn't matter to me how old you are or what you turn into once a month, either?" Lupin ran his hand through his thinning hair several times before she withdrew the question. "Never mind." Her hair was pink again. "Baby steps, I suppose."

The next thing he knew, she was on top of him, kissing him madly. He turned the tables on her a second later by rolling her onto her back.

"Ow." Her slight protest was muffled by his neck and her chuckle, but he drew away immediately.

"Is it your ribs?" Worried, he frowned. "Are they still hurting?"

"No." He could have sworn that a blush crept across her cheeks. "That's not where I'm sore."

And then it was his turn to blush. "Oh. Yes...well..." He cleared his throat. "Should I apologize for that?"

Smiling broadly, Tonks shook her head. "No way. Never apologize for that, Remus." Her lips found a place just under his jaw that he'd never known could make his knees weak if kissed just right. "I may not be experienced, but I know a good thing when I've found it."

"Me, too." He smoothed a pink lock away from her smooth cheek. "You are a good thing, Dora."

"Then...don't be a prat." She cupped his face in her hands. "Don't let me go."

Although his only response was an even deeper kiss, in the back of Lupin's mind, he already knew he would have to let her go. Voldemort was back. The world was changing. They were on the brink of another war. And although Dumbledore had not yet come out and asked him to undertake any missions, he already knew that his lycanthropy would most likely be called upon soon. At best, he would be a bridge between the Order and the other werewolves of the world. At worst, he would be sent to spy on the others of his kind.

Either way, his life would be in grave danger. It would not be fair to expect Nymphadora to wait for him when it was highly doubtful he'd ever return to her. It would be better to sever their connection before it became too strong, before he needed her love to survive.

Before he could hurt her any more than he already had.

Still, it was impossible to stop kissing her.

Just one night, he promised himself as he slowly, carefully sank back into her warmth. One night to have her, hold her, love her...one blissful night of living his dreams before he faced cold reality.

Tonks went to sleep with her lover's arms firmly wrapped around her sated body. But when she woke up, she was alone.

Before a flood of hot tears could spill over, the bedroom door creaked open. Her heart lept into her throat...only to sink back down when she realized it was not Remus returning, but Kreacher the dour house-elf.

He reluctantly plodded into the room. Tonks frantically secured the sheets around her chest; there was something just not right about being practically naked in front of the grumbling creature.

"Kreacher was ordered by the werewolf to give you this." He barely reached top of the bed, but he tossed a folded sheet of parchment up onto it. Muttering about half-bloods and lamenting the state of the Noble House of Black, Kreacher slumped out, slamming the door shut behind him.

After staring at the paper for a long time, Tonks reached for it, surprised at how her hand trembled. She unfolded it and was greeted by the sight of his perfect penmanship. Tonks bit her lip, holding back a smile. Of couse he'd have good handwriting.

If only the words themselves could have been as beautiful.

Dora,

By the time you read this, I will have left London. I cannot say where I am going or why, but please know that nothing insignificant could have torn me away from your side this morning.

I will never forget last night. Rather, I will carry the memories with me for the rest of my life, however long or short that might be.

But I urge you, as someone who knows only too well how much happiness you bring into a man's life, put me out of your heart and mind.

Find someone else to love.

With regards,

Remus

The parchment floated to the floor as the woman in the bed doubled over in grief, her limp, black hair hiding her tears from the world.

Fin