Leave out all the rest…
Author's note: Yay, a oneshot! The only thing I can possibly finish. Prowl and Jazz friendship fic. =D Oh, and I didn't put the whole song in because that would just kind of be a waste of words and space don't you think?
Oh, and a small thanks to Player4 for giving my oneshot a quick look over and edit.
Leave Out All The Rest - (Song by Linkin Park)
(Try
listening to it while reading this!)
I dreamed I was
missing After my dreaming So if you're asking me When my time comes And
don't resent me Leave out all the rest
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no
one else cared
I woke with this fear
What
am I leaving
When I'm done here
I
want you to know
Forget the wrong that
I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your
memory
Leave out all the
rest
"AAAHHH!!!!"
Prowl jerked out of recharge cycling his intakes as fast as they would go. He sat upright on his berth trying to slow it down and calm his own spark. Then he flopped back down still cycling hard.
"Just -huff- a dream, –huff- a nightmare"
It was the same dream that had plagued his mind for the past week. It was weird. Normally he had a dreamless recharge. And when he did dream it was nothing as imaginative as this. He had thought about telling someone before but his comrades probably had something more important to do than listen to him ramble on about his silly nightmare. But now the nightmare seemed to be getting more and more real, and the need to tell someone was growing. Jazz chose this moment to enter.
Prowl's chamber's door swished open, revealing the grinning Porsche holding two energon cubes. "Mornin' Prowler!" He looked at Prowl and his grin drooped into a frown. "Hey, are ya ok there?" He walked in and sat on the edge of Prowl's berth.
Prowl gave a small weak smile. "Prowl, Jazz, my name is Prowl."
If someone had removed Jazz's visor they would have seen him rolling his optics. "Yeah, yeah, yeah Prowler." He grinned again. "So seriously, wha' could possibly be botherin' our resident stoic statue?"
Prowl sighed. "It's nothing." He said wearily as he stared at the ceiling.
The saboteur snorted. "It's nothin' my aft. It's botherin' ma best friend and that's enough fer me ta need ta know. Now tell me."
Prowl debated for a moment on whether or not he should tell Jazz and finally the decision to tell him won out. He got up from his previous position and sat next to Jazz.
"Well… It's just this… dream I've been having." He confessed. His blue optics were gazing on the floor.
"A dream? Is dat what this is all about?" He smiled until Prowl gave him one of his icy glares.
"Yes Jazz. If you don't want to hear about it the door is right behind you." His doorwings twitched with annoyance. Jazz held his hands up and swayed away from the Datsun, surrendering.
"'Kay, fine, I'm listening." Jazz nodded, "Go on."
Prowl sighed again. "Well, I dreamed I was…" he flinched, "missing. Gone. Never coming back." Jazz's optics widened behind his visor. "And you were scared, about what happened to me I mean. But no one would listen to you when you talked about me, because well… no one really cared." Any trace of humor seemed to have fled from Jazz's face. Prowl's shoulders slumped. "Who would care about the stoic, humorless tactician with the stick up his aft when he dies? Other than you of course." He added quickly. Not giving a chance to answer he continued talking.
"And after my dream I wake with this… fear." Prowl's optics focused on Jazz. "And I there's a lingering question. What am I leaving when I'm done here?" Jazz wanted to speak but he couldn't find the words to say. They escaped him, like he was trying to grab water with his hands. The SIC's optics turned to the floor again.
"So I want you know, when my time comes and I'm gone can you help me leave behind something or just some reasons to be missed? And if you feel empty without me around to fill my space in your life, try to keep me in your memory. I don't want to be forgotten." Leave out all the rest…
Jazz smiled but his spark ached and something in his vocal processor failed to produce even a drop of the normal humor in his voice. "I won't forget ya Prowler. You know that."
"And that's why I have faith in you my friend." He briefly smiled and silence took over for a few moments before quickly being broken.
"You know, I might be strong and stoic on the surface, but that strength doesn't go all the way through. It hurts sometimes, knowing that so few even want me here."
Jazz looked at Prowl. "Well, ya can't be perfect."
And Prowl looked at Jazz. "Well neither can you." Another sad smile graced his faceplate.
Another few moments of silence came and hung in the chamber. Then Jazz spoke up again.
"You know, yer able ta hide all tha' hurt inside, and you've learned ta hide it so well. Sumtimes I wonder how you can keep it all in there." He spoke quietly but it seemed booming loud inside the quiet quarters.
Prowl shrugged, his doorwings emphasizing it. "Well, I can't be who you are. And that's… that's just the way I am."
The two officers looked at each others' optics with intense sadness, and silence once again reigned.
--Leave out all the rest…--
Primus can be cruel. He gave his children the ability to feel emotion and to show it. They were given the ability to laugh when happy, yell when angry, and even drop their jaw when shocked. But sadness, there was nothing a cybertronian could do to relieve themselves of pure sorrow. They could not shed tears and allow their pain to leak out like a human could. No, their sadness lingered for a long time with no easy way to simply let it out.
It was the day after he had talked to Prowl. And Jazz wished for nothing more than to be human just so he could cry.
Because Prowl was gone.