WARNING: This is total crack.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Star Trek (I wish I owned Bones and Scotty, though), or Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.
Pleeeeeeeease, no flames, first fic posting ever!!!!!!!!
Enjoy!
Ice Cold
Cameron: Why are diamonds a girl's best friend?
Jim: …Huh?
Cameron: Why are diamonds a girl's best friend?
Spock: Yes, why is that?
Jim: I…well…hmmm. They're…pretty?
Spock/Cameron: …?
Jim: I don't know! Hang on a sec. Uhura!
Uhura: What?
Jim: These two want to know why diamonds are a girl's best friend?
Uhura: …Oh. They're not, really. It's just an expression.
Cameron: Expression. Figure of speech. Turn of phrase.
Spock: *stares blankly at Cameron* Yes, I believe so.
Bones: *shows up, looking solemn*
Jim: What is it, Bones?
Bones: He's DEAD, Jim.
Jim: What?! Who?! Who's dead?!
Bones: Sulu.
Jim: WHAT?! HOW?!
Bones: He contracted OMGWTFPICKLES syndrome.
Jim: …What?!
Bones: He was eating a pickle and was stabbed by an OMGWTF.
Jim: WTF is an OMGWTF?!
Bones: A giant, floating shark.
Jim: …A giant, floating shark…
Bones: Yes.
Jim: And where is this shark now?
Bones: It's on the holodeck.
Jim: …Oh.
Bones: Along with the tribbles.
Jim: TRIBBLES?!
Cameron: You should write him a note.
Jim: Write who a note?!
Cameron: The one you call Sulu.
Jim: Guys, who is this?
Cameron: It might help with the grief.
Jim: …?!?!
Spock: Is note-writing a common custom for mourning humans?
Jim: Uhhhh….
Bones: …Uhura?
Uhura: What're you looking at me for?! I don't know!
Chekov: Hello!
Sulu's Ghost: MWAHAHA, I'M BACK FROM TEH DEAD!!! *swings lovely collapsible katana of sheer awesomeness*
Cameron: Impossible.
Spock: Not necessarily.
Cameron: No. Impossible.
Spock: *shocked expression*
Jim: Jeez, she's colder than you are!
Fin
Author's Note
OMG!!!! ALIENS MADE ME DO IT!!! RESISTANCE WAS FUTILE!!!
I love Cameron from The Sarah Connor Chronicles. She's hilarious. I was just curious about what would happen if she happened to meet Spock.
Huh.
That was more anticlimactic than I expected.
Sulu's Ghost: SWISH STABBITY SWIPE!
Me: SHUT UP!!!
Chekov: No! Russia!
Sulu's Ghost: Japan!
Chekov: Russia!
Sulu's Ghost: Japan!
Chekov: RUSSIA!
Sulu's Ghost: JAPAN!
Me: SHUT UP!
Chekov: …Russia?
Me: …NEW ZEALAND!!!!!!