Warnings: AU

Disclaimer: I do not own FFVII/Kingdom Hearts or its characters. I do not make any money from this fiction.

Summary: Writen from prompt: Sephiroth/Cloud: (imagined/implied?) mpreg – Riku looks like he could be their child. Don't know where I found the prompt. If it's yours, surprise!

"Ya know," Yuffie said as they watched Riku and Sora spar one lazy afternoon, "Riku could totally be Cloud and Sephiroth's love-child."

Aeris blew lemonade out her nose and howled with laughter. Tifa was just as amused, but refrained from snorting out her own drink of lemonade.

"You're right!" Aeris said, once she had stopped sputtering. "He does look like them!"

"Who do you think was the Mommy?! And how would they have it? Crap it out? I need to knoooooow!!!" Yuffie whined.

Tifa snorted. "You know Cloud would shit a brick if he could hear what you guys just said."

"I suppose that means that I don't want to know."

All three woman froze and slowly turned around. Cloud stood behind them, an amused half smile on his face and arms crossed over his chest. "Well ladies? Out with it. What don't I want to hear?"

"Oh…nothing," Aeris said, trying to look innocent and failing miserably.

Yuffie didn't even try. "Riku looks like he could be mppphmphhh-" The brunette glared at Tifa since her hand was now clamped over her mouth.

"A very good swordsman when he gets older," Tifa interjected.

Yuffie removed Tifa's hand from her mouth only to have Aeris slap her hand over it before she could utter more than a, "he-"

Cloud raised an eyebrow in suspicion. "Somehow, I don't think that's what you were talking about."

Yuffie wiggled out of the other two women's hold and before they could contain her, she managed to blurt out, "Riku looks like he could be you and Sephy's baby!"

Tifa and Aeris both groaned as Yuffie blew them a kiss and ran off. They covered their faces and waited for the fervent and very loud denial that Cloud was sure to explode with in a moment.

The moment came and went, and there was no explosion.

Slowly, both women dropped their hands from their faces to look at Cloud.

Surprisingly, he wasn't even looking at them. He was looking at an oblivious Riku with an expression of such sadness that they didn't know whether they had hit the subject right on the nose, or if they had inadvertently dug up a very painful almost.

Cloud blinked rapidly and took a couple of deep, agonized breaths. "I'm gonna…gonna go. For a bit."

With that, he was gone. Tifa and Aeris turned to watch Riku continuing the spar with Sora, both of them completely ignorant as to what had just occurred.

"Do you think…?" Tifa wondered aloud.

"Well…" Aeris said after a bit, "if we really want to find out, I think I know who we should talk to."

********************

Tifa didn't like it, but if Aeris thought they would be safe she wasn't going to argue with her. Because really, you could only kill someone so many times before it got old, right?

Right?

Sephiroth's usual hang-out was a quiet, serene little outlook over the town the group of heroes called their home. They sat on a hollowed out log and played cards as they waited for Sephiroth to show. It was a gamble as to whether or not he would actually appear, but it wasn't like they had a lot to do today anyway. It was a day off, usually spent playing cards around Aeris' kitchen table.

Well, the cards were still in action, even if the table was a splintery log.

"Are you positive this is a good idea?"

Aeris paused as she went to grab a card from the top of the pile. "Well, it isn't like he's been going on destructive rampages lately. If anything, he's acting like a forlorn puppy. If Sephiroth wanted to cause trouble, he'd have done it already."

Tifa had to concede to that point. All Sephiroth did anymore was play the part of the deranged stalker.

That, and annoy Cloud to no end.

"How do we know he'll tell us the truth?" Tifa mused, laying a card down and drawing another.

Aeris pondered her hand and discarded. "When has he ever lied? If anything, he takes great pleasure in taking the truth and rubbing our faces in it."

Tifa couldn't argue with that point either.

"What, may I ask, are you doing here?"

Aeris didn't even look up from her cards, but Tifa jumped and fell backward off the log, spilling her cards everywhere. Aeris discarded and pulled another from the deck as a tall, silver and black shadow advanced on them. Smiling in triumph, Aeris slapped her cards down. "Thirty one!" she crowed, grabbing the stack of munny and stuffing it into her pocket.

Sephiroth's expression was just as cold and disinterested as it usually was. The only difference was the thin veneer of interest in the green eyes.

"We have a question," Aeris said as she helped Tifa into a sitting position.

The interest flared briefly. "What kind of question do you have that you think I have the answer?"

Tifa tried to think of a way to ask the question without really asking the question. It just seemed so crude to come out and just ask-

"Did you and Cloud have an ass-baby and name it Riku?"

…never mind.

Tifa had the pleasure of seeing Sephiroth totally and completely stunned at Aeris' bold (and extremely crude) question. His mouth fell open, and his eyes were wide with incredulity.

"Excuse me?"

Aeris cleared her throat. "Did you and Cloud do the nasty and make a baby?"

He sputtered for a moment, completely without his usual dignity. "I don't see how that is any of your business."

"So it's true!" Aeris exclaimed, fist punching the air.

"Wait a minute-" Sephiroth tried to forestall her, but Aeris was not to be reigned in.

"You didn't deny it!"

"True-"

"That means I'm right!"

Sephiroth's expression melted from confused befuddlement into anger in the space of a breath. "I'm glad that a subject so painful for Cloud and I gives you such pleasure." He turned from them and stepped to the edge of the overlook. They couldn't see his face, but the quiver in his wings indicated that he was in the grips of some very violent emotions.

"I…I'm sorry…" Aeris said quietly.

Sephiroth snorted.

Tifa, wondering to herself if she had a death wish, stood and slowly approached the deadly warrior. "Listen, we just wanted to know. We were curious. He looks too much like you two for it to be a coincidence. We'll just drop it."

"Did you bring this up with Cloud?" he asked quietly.

"Accidentally, yes."

Sephiroth shook his head, silver locks shifting over his shoulders. "I need to go find him."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Aeris piped up, clearly unfazed at the thought of drawing attention to herself. "Cloud hates you with a flaming passion." She thought about that for a moment then snorted. "Flaming…" she giggled, covering her amused smile with her hand.

"What are you, twelve?" Sephiroth growled in annoyance.

"I may be immature, but at least I'm happy."

Sephiroth snarled, lip curling. "I don't have much to be happy about, flower girl."

"Then find something," she said, making it sound so simple that he almost believed the annoying bitch for a moment.

"If only happiness were something one could find, like a lost set of keys."

"I can give you a map." She looked contemplative. "But your one of those guys that doesn't look at maps and won't stop for directions, aren't you?"

"Didn't I kill you once already?"

"I got better."

Clearly exasperated beyond belief, Sephiroth snarled at the two women one more time before jumping off the ledge. His wing snapped open to catch the air, swooping in a smooth, unhurried arc toward the direction Aeris knew Cloud would be sulking.

"I guess he didn't need a map after all," she said with a smile.

*********************

"Do you always have to sulk?"

Cloud looked up from his slump against the cold rock wall. "Do you always have to be a bastard?"

Sephiroth's eyebrow rose. "I don't know how to be anything else."

The blond smiled a little, but it quickly disappeared. "How did you know I would be here?"

A derogative sounding snort. "I was visited by your cackling hens. They were annoying, so I killed them."

It was Cloud's turn to snort. "You never were good at lying."

"How could you have possibly known I was lying?" Sephiroth sounded almost offended.

"I could always tell. Same as-" he paused and swallowed back instant tears.

"The same as Zackary," Sephiroth finished for him.

Cloud nodded, slumping a little further into the wall. They were quiet for a long time, neither looking at each other.

Finally, after an eternity of silence, Cloud said, "He looks like you."

"And you as well," Sephiroth pointed out.

Cloud smiled slightly. "Not as much as you. He fights like you, too."

"I should hope so. You fight like a drunkard with a tennis racquet."

A chuckle. "Well, this drunkard killed you…let's see here…three times? Or was it four…?"

Sephiroth wrinkled his nose in distaste. "Luck. All of it."

"Suuuuure. Luck. That was it."

Silence again, and the sun started to set, leaving them both in twilight.

"Are you happy with…how he turned out?" Sephiroth asked quietly.

Cloud closed his eyes. "I'm not pleased that he ended up here despite everything we did to protect him. I thought we hid him so well, so far away…" He shook his head in defeat. "I guess I should have known better. Any child of ours wouldn't stay out of trouble for long. It seems like we attract it."

"Indeed."

"If I would have known this is how it would have ended up anyway…" Cloud sighed and drooped his head against his pulled up knees.

"We never would have given him up."

"No," Cloud's voice was muffled by his knees. "I never would have sent him away. I missed out on everything. Everything. All I wanted was for him to be safe…and look where he ended up."

Sephiroth stepped forward and turned to lean against the wall Cloud was sitting against. He slowly slid down to sit in the same position as Cloud, with his legs tucked up against his body and arms wrapped around his knees.

"Should we tell him?"

Cloud shook his head. "What good would that do him?"

Sephiroth chuckled a little, his low voice echoing in Cloud's chest. "It would probably scar him for life, knowing he was born of two…men."

"You mean, two science experiments."

"That, too."

Cloud sighed, pondering for a moment. "Maybe…maybe when he's older. I don't think it's necessary."

Sephiroth reached out slowly, as if extending his arm to a feral wolf. His arm slid around Cloud's shoulders and drew him against his side. The blond was amazed at how right it felt to lean against the bigger man. It had been…years?...since they had touched each other in anything other than anger. It was a natural feeling, like they had been made for each other, just as they had been made to hate each other. Cloud snorted in private amusement. Talk about your stereotypical love/hate relationship.

Sephiroth leaned close to brush his lips over Cloud's ear. "Wouldn't you love it if Riku came up to you, gave you a big hug, and called you 'Daddy'? You could still have that. I've listened to him talk of his life before he came here. Before he opened the door between the worlds. He wasn't exactly happy. He had no real attachment to the woman who called herself his 'mother.' I of anyone should know that mothers are not all they're cracked up to be."

Cloud smiled, snuggling a little bit closer. "I guess you would."

"What's the worst that could happen? He could leave. It's not like we haven't lived without him before."

"True, that," Cloud conceded. He smirked a little bit, nudging Sephiroth with his elbow. "Will you let him call you, 'Mommy'?"

Sephiroth looked disgusted. "Absolutely not. I'll be Father, and you'll be Daddy."

"But technically-"

"Nobody needs to know the technicalities."

"You know he's going to ask."

"That doesn't mean he needs to know."

"Now who's withholding information?"

Sephiroth grumpily jabbed him in the ribs with his finger. Cloud grunted and elbowed him in the gut. They stared each other down, faces just a breath apart. Their eyes dared the other to so much as blink.

In a movement so slow it could hardly be called moving, they leaned in toward each other. Their lips touched so lightly they could feel the little creases and dips in each other's skin. They breathed like that for a moment, barely touching, then leaned a little deeper and pressed a little harder. It was hard to tell who opened their mouth first. The hot taste of one another was so long in coming that neither would remember who gave in to who first.

Despite how slowly the kiss started, it quickly turned into something more. The kiss became heated and deep and wet, tongues lapping and teeth nipping.

Suddenly as if each of them had a epiphany at the same moment, they pulled apart to pant harshly.

"If we are going to continue this," Sephiroth said breathlessly, "you're wearing a condom."

Cloud looked horrified. "I…I don't just carry around condoms."

"Then you're on the bottom."

"No way. I pitch you catch."

"I'm not getting pregnant again. It was traumatizing enough the first time."

Cloud smiled. "Ya. I remember. I thought you'd never forgive me."

Sephiroth carded a hand through Cloud's spiky hair. "I never thought I would either."

Sighing, Cloud leaned his head against Sephiroth's shoulder. "I guess we need to go into town and pick up some…supplies then."

Sephiroth's smirk was triumphant. "That's what I thought, bitch."

Cloud ignored him and unwound himself from the bigger man. He stretched a little as he stood, slightly stiff from sitting in the same position for so long. Sephiroth stood as well and pulled the blond into an embrace. "When are we going to confront Riku?"

"Maybe tomorrow. I think that tonight," Cloud stroked his hands up and down Sephiroth's sides, "we need to have Mommy-Daddy time."

"If you call me Mommy one more time," Sephiroth growled, "I'll find a way to get you pregnant and turn you over to Yuffie and Aeris."

Cloud squeaked. "I'll be good."

"That's what I thought."

*************************

Riku and Sora sat side by side, completely and utterly flabbergasted.

"I, you, them and…wow."

Riku nodded, in complete agreement. They hadn't meant to overhear Cloud and Sephiroth's conversation. They really hadn't. It was just…they had stumbled into the cliffy area and decided to explore. They had heard voices and decided to find out who was talking.

And heard everything.

As soon as the two elders were out of hearing distance, the two friends sprinted back to Aeris' house. The barreled through the house, not even stopping to say, "Hi," to the group gathered around the kitchen table. Once inside their shared room, they flopped down on the bed and stared at each other incredulously.

"Wow," was all Sora could say.

"Ya," Riku breathed, not really knowing how to process the overheard conversation. Should he be happy, embarrassed, mad, grateful, feeling abandoned?

"Dude, you're parents are like, the most awesome fighters ever. You could totally score some wicked sparing sessions," Sora said.

…which wasn't was a bad idea.

They both became utterly silent as they heard thumping coming up the stairs. Two sets of heavy booted feet trod down the hall and to the room they knew belonged to Cloud, which was right next door to Riku's. The door shut and they heard the lock snick into place. It wasn't long after they heard the first moan.

Riku looked absolutely horrified. "Oh there is no way in hell I'm going to listen to my parents have sex."

They beat a hasty retreat, but were waylaid in the kitchen.

"What are you two blowing out of here so fast for?" Aeris asked, throwing down her hand of cards and glaring at a smirking Leon.

"Uhh…" Riku stuttered, not really knowing what to say.

"Cloud and Sephiroth are having sex upstairs," Sora said with a completely straight face.

Everyone at the table choked and coughed in concert.

"Excuse me?" Tifa finally managed to croak out.

"Riku wanted to protect my virgin ears, so we're gonna go stay at Merlin's tonight." With that, Sora grabbed Riku's arm and hauled him out of the house.

Yuffie looked Aeris and jerked her head towards the stairs. "So…wanna find out who's the Mama?"

Aeris grinned maniacally. "As long as we take pictures."

END