Title: The Shadow and the Real, Chapter 6
Author: DianeB
Rating: T
Pairing: Hahn/OFC, Robbins/Torres

Summary: George's funeral, after which Erica and Callie finally have a chance to talk face-to-face. Life goes on.

See Chapter 1 for original Author's Note and Disclaimer.

Chapter 6 Disclaimer: The caterer came from an internet search and was chosen because what they offered worked for this story and I liked the name.

A circle 'round and 'round made up of memories,
And as we finish then again we start,
And at the end we're back at the beginning,
And even in reunion there is parting.

-- Ann Reed, from her song, "Even in Reunion"

oOo oOo oOo

The funeral itself was a solemn affair, attended by nearly all the staff of Seattle Grace who could get away for the hour, many of whom didn't even know George O'Malley, but were attending out of respect for a fallen colleague, much the way police officers did. George's mother and brothers sat in the first pew, his brothers unmoving and silent, his mother openly weeping.

Erica sat with Callie and Arizona in the pew just behind them, and Erica knew many eyes were on them. As arranged the day before, Erica had not gone to the hospital at all, but instead met Callie and Arizona in the church parking lot and walked in with them.

To say a hush fell over the room at their entrance would be like saying Lady Godiva was a bit underdressed.

Erica actually saw Cristina Yang poke Meredith Grey, and she bit back the urge to make a stinging comment about mature behavior, knowing that would only make her sound just as immature.

Callie sat dry-eyed and stoic throughout the service, and she did so without medication. At one point, Callie leaned forward to pat Louise O'Malley's shoulder. When Mrs. O'Malley reached up to cover Callie's hand with her own, Erica could plainly see it was all Callie could do to keep from breaking down. Callie and Louise stayed that way until the service ended, even though Erica knew Callie's awkward position had to have been killing her lower back.

When the final poem was read and the last hymn sung, the pastor gave the benediction, announced there would be a "social time" in the fellowship hall on the top floor, and left the pulpit. People began to stir from the pews, many in hospital scrubs leaving quickly to make their shifts. Erica mentally prepared herself to face a few people she really didn't want to face.

As they moved into the aisle, she on one side of Callie, and Arizona on the other, no one approached them, which was just fine with Erica. She turned her head to find Arizona's eyes on her. Moving around Callie, who had turned to hug Louise, Arizona came to Erica's side and said in a stage whisper, "Looks like we've got the plague, doesn't it?"

"Yes it does, but I'm not complaining. I am curious as to why. You'd think after what happened between Callie and I, Mark Sloan at the very least would be ready to burn me on one of these crosses."

"It's the three of us. People are disappointed there are no fireworks."

"Tell me you're joking."

"I wish I was. Listen, I know this isn't the time or place, but here's the thing. I arrived at SGH just after you left. Callie was a mess, and from the stories I heard, you were a green-skinned witch. To people like Meredith Grey and Cristina Yang, you and I should be at each other's throats. Because we're not, people don't know how to act, which of course works in our favor. Trust me, I know from this."

Erica chuckled softly. "There you go, sounding like Veronica again. Is there some kind of handbook?"

Arizona dimpled. "Yes, I believe there is."

"And I can order this from Amazon?"

Arizona snorted in amusement. "Seriously, if you think about it, it's really no different from straight couples and exes."

"Uh huh. Except it's not straight couples, which makes it so much more interesting, and the last any of these people saw of me, I was storming away from Callie in the hospital's parking lot. Unless Callie's done some recent sharing, none of them know what's happened since then."

"Right. And wouldn't you prefer it that way?"

"You know, now that you've explained it, I'm not sure. Certainly I don't want any confrontations in front of George's mother, but I wouldn't mind slapping Yang."

Arizona chuckled. "I like you, Erica. How 'bout we see what happens when we get upstairs. Hold on. You are coming upstairs, aren't you?"

By this time, they had reached the church's foyer and found themselves quite without Callie, who had gone to George's casket with his mother, where they were standing together with heads bowed. Ronny and Jerry were nowhere to be seen.

Observing Callie and Louise, Erica asked absently, "I wonder what would have happened if Callie had stayed married to George?"

"Are you asking me or just asking the cosmos? Because if you're asking me, I'd say neither of us would have had the chance to love Calliope, and I'm not sure I like that idea."

Erica couldn't disagree.

oOo oOo oOo

Erica didn't go upstairs with Arizona. Instead, she waited until Callie and Louise were finished at the casket and met them in the aisle at the halfway point. Erica expressed her condolences to Louise, who did not need to be reminded of who Erica was (that is, former Head of Cardiothoracic Surgery at Seattle Grace and the doctor who had performed her husband's valve replacement surgery), and then Erica and Callie slipped into an empty pew.

"How are you holding up?"

Callie sniffed and rubbed her nose. "Okay, I guess. Better than I was." Callie cast her eyes to the casket. "I still can't believe he's gone, and I figure it's gonna take a while until I do. I think I'm gonna miss him forever, but there's something to be said for funerals. They provide closure."

Erica struggled to keep her face from reflecting her gut reaction to this comment, knowing Callie had not meant it the way it had sounded. That she'd been unsuccessful was evident in Callie's immediate reaction. "No, no! Oh my God, I didn't mean that as a dig, okay? We had…we're having our closure, aren't we? God. I'm sorry." Callie scrubbed a hand over her face.

"Callie, relax. I know what you meant. And yes, we're having closure. Not to change the subject, but what's going on with your father? Arizona said he went nuts when you told him about the two of you."

"Man," Callie said, rolling her eyes, "I knew you two talked while I was asleep yesterday. That's not fair, you know."

"She's worried about you, Callie. That's all. Besides, it sounds rotten, what he did."

Callie sighed and looked down at her hands, picking at a cuticle. "It was all ridiculous, really. He decided Seattle had 'corrupted' me and he was going to take me home. To Florida! Honest to God, I just lost it. I mean, I love my dad, but he was being impossible! So we yelled at each other a lot. In Spanish. And in the end, he threatened to cut me off, which I didn't believe he'd do and I told him that, but, well, he did. So now…now I have to think about every penny I spend, and I never really had to do that before. It's weird, and I know it sounds pretentious and all, but to me it just means my dad hates me."

"Callie, I'm so sorry."

Callie waved her hand in a gesture of dismissal. "Nah, don't be. I'm okay with it now. Arizona says I have to give him time. Unfortunately, there's no magic number as to how much time, but Arizona says I have to be patient, which isn't one of my strong points, as you know. I haven't heard from my mom or my sister, either, which makes it worse, but for real? I've been all through it, and I've cried and cried and now I'm just done, ya know? Really, I'm not exactly destitute. I thought I was at first – oh, you shoulda heard me, like I was a step away from the shelter, but I'm honestly not. It just hurts that my family has apparently disowned me for…for being me."

Erica nodded, but couldn't think of a word to add. Callie filled the silence with another subject, though it wasn't anything better. "Did Arizona tell you anything more about Izzie?"

Erica spoke instinctively, without thought to tone or content. "She told me they ignored Izzie's DNR, which doesn't surprise me, but aside from that, she didn't say much."

Callie at least had the good grace to wince. "Erica—"

"Callie, I'm sorry, that was unfair," Erica said quickly. "I mean, okay, you know how I feel about that kind of disregard, but it's all right, and I swear to God I mean it. Seattle Grace is what it is, and I've come to terms with it. The hospital was running fine before I got there and continued to run fine after I left. Tell me more about Izzie, please. Forget the rest, will you?"

Callie heaved a great sigh, clearly relieved at being spared this particular quarrel. "Okay, well, she's still in a coma and Alex took a leave to stay with her. Wait. Did you know they got married? Alex and Izzie, I mean?"

Erica nodded. "Yes. Arizona told me."

"Okay, well, they brought another bed in the room for Alex, so he's basically living at the hospital now. Izzie's doctor isn't very optimistic about her recovery, and she's being careful not to give Alex false hope, but he still has hope, ya know? He reads to her, plays music, bathes her, tells her stupid jokes, does all her physical therapy; he's pretty much devoting every waking hour to taking care of her." Callie shrugged. "That's about it. We're all sort of in a holding pattern now, just waiting." There was another stretch of silence before Callie pointed to the ceiling and gave Erica a knowing look. "You're not comin' upstairs, are you?"

Erica shook her head. "No. I don't see the need."

"Are you sure? Because there's going to be some awesome food up there. Bailey ordered from Twelve Baskets, and they're the best. They even have something called Memorial Receptions. Can you believe that? I think that's what Bailey got. You should come upstairs. Please come upstairs. How long are you in town?"

Erica put aside Callie's plea in favor of answering the easy question. "I'm flying back Friday. I thought maybe I'd spend a day sightseeing, you know? I didn't really do much of that while I lived here, and Ronnie's since taught me the benefits of being a tourist in your own town."

"Ah, right. Veronica." Callie gave Erica a stern look. "Does Ronnie make you happy?"

Erica smiled, recognizing Callie's protective tone as the same one she'd taken with Arizona the day before. "Yes, she does. Very much so. And I know for a fact you make Arizona happy."

Callie rolled her eyes again, made a moue of grudging acceptance and pointed to herself, saying, "This is me, accepting the fact that you and Arizona talked about me while I was asleep and couldn't defend myself. I'll bet Arizona wonders if she makes me happy, huh?" Without waiting for Erica, Callie answered her own question. "S'okay, because she does make me happy. Trouble is, I've only recently realized that, and I'm not sure how to actually tell her."

"Callie, that's easy. Just tell her. Do it with flowers, or chocolates, or edible underwear, but just tell her."

"Edible underwear?" Callie's familiar, full-throated laughter echoed in the cavernous sanctuary, until Callie realized where she was and slammed her hand over her mouth. "Oh my God," she said through her fingers, "if I hadn't heard it with my own ears, I'd've never believed it."

But Erica was secretly glad she'd invoked Callie's laughter and was only sorry it had ended so abruptly. "I blame that on Veronica, and I'm sure if I gave it some thought, I could come up with worse. But my point is, don't waste any more time, got it?"

"Got it."

"Good. Now listen," Erica said firmly, "please don't make me go upstairs. You're the only one I wanted to see. Truth of it is, I just want to go home."

Callie nodded. "I get it. Home is Baltimore now, huh?"

"Yes."

"What'm I gonna tell everyone?"

"Oh, I don't know. I'm sure you and Arizona will think of something."

Callie gifted Erica with one of her fifty-megawatt smiles, and it was almost as good as the laughter. "Me and Arizona, huh?"

Erica nodded and returned the smile, knowing hers didn't attain nearly the same wattage. "Yes, 'huh.' And you better get up there, or she'll think of something on her own and you'll miss out on all the fun."

Callie sighed, suddenly somber. "I'll miss you, you know."

"I know. I'll miss you, too." Erica reached out and took Callie's hand. "Callie, it's okay."

"No, it's not," Callie said, shaking her head and looking away. "I-I don't want you to leave. How selfish is that?"

"Pretty darned, I'd say. But I think I understand."

"Good," Callie said, returning her eyes to Erica's, "then explain it to me."

"Nope. Go ask Arizona. Ask her about the handbook."

Callie blinked in confusion. "Huh?"

"Never mind. Just go on. I'll call when I get home to let you know I made it back in one piece."

"And you'll call regularly after that?"

"I promise to try, if you'll do the same."

"Deal." Callie stood and Erica followed suit. Callie, with her hand still in Erica's, pulled Erica into a hug before Erica had a chance to consider the propriety of it. Once in Callie's arms, however, Erica relaxed against her, knowing without quite knowing how, that this embrace was one of genuine friendship, wholly free of the conflicted emotions of the day before. They separated, and Callie made her way to the staircase in the rear of the sanctuary, turning back once to wave.

Erica returned the wave and then lingered until Callie had disappeared up the steps, recognizing the bittersweet irony of the moment. Looking around the sanctuary, Erica allowed her eyes to rest briefly on George's flower-covered casket. Closure, indeed. She didn't really believe in the afterlife, per se, but she hoped George was happy and pain-free, wherever he was.

Gathering her things, Erica exited the church to call for a cab.

oOo oOo oOo

That evening, Erica sat at the nearly-empty gate and pulled out her cell phone. It rang only once before Veronica answered. "Erica?"

"Hey, you."

The relief in Veronica's voice was unmistakable. "Hello, hon, it's so good to hear your voice. You tried to call once before, didn't you?

"Yes. Sorry I didn't leave a message."

"That's okay. I'm just glad you tried. So how'd things go?"

"Fine."

"Just 'fine?'"

"Really, fine. I talked with Callie, I talked with Arizona, I went to the funeral and sat with Callie and Arizona, sang the hymns, and offered condolences to George's mother. I did not speak to anyone else, and I don't feel the least bit sorry about that."

"Uh huh. And I'll bet my dogs all those 'anyone elses' avoided the three of you like the plague, didn't they?"

Erica snickered.

"What's funny?"

"How 'bout I tell you all about it when I get home?"

"Any chance you can get an earlier flight?"

"I'm way ahead of you, Ronnie. I'll be there in a few hours."

End

oOo oOo oOo

I got blue sky by the ocean,
I got a bluebird singing freedom,
And I'm happy to be living,
I believe I'm myself again.

-- Janis Ian, from the song, "I Believe I'm Myself Again"