Jane's boredom deepened to the point that she turned to Kevin and, with a sarcastic smile tapped him on the shoulder and posed the question, "What're you in for?"

With his usual dopey, vacant smile Kevin perked up and, predictably chirped "I'm the QB!"

Daria rolled her eyes. Thus far, Ms. Li's mandatory Super Heroism and YOU! assembly was nothing more than several black-suited "officials" with no names, no credentials, and, supposedly, no affiliation to CertIAn government agencies droning on and on and on about Lawndale's "exceptional youth" having "the future's future" on their shoulders.

After the subsequent jokes following that pearl drop of wisdom, Jane had amused herself by changing her appearance every few seconds, oft times at Daria's request. When asked what her talent was, Daria rolled her eyes.

"Once a day, I can grow one finger on one hand a centimeter longer than the other for the period of seventeen seconds."

Jane had laughed.

"Okay, I can understand why you kept that one to yourself."

"Well if I ever find myself in a situation where I'm restrained behind a line of lasers and the world's salvation depends on me pushing a big red button that's just a centimeter out of reach, I'm sure I'll still feel the same way."

Jane, now with chin-length orange hair, bright green eyes and skin the color of caramel, smirked.

"Actually, there's another employment opportunity you haven't thought of." Daria cocked a brow and waited. "Proctology."

Very calmly, Daria extended her middle finger and as Jane watched, it grew just a tiny bit longer. Daria smirked.

Now, Jane laughed and her hair began to grow at an amazing rate until it shrouded her face and hung down nearly to her thighs.

"Why are you here, Kevin. As in why did Manson sign you up?"

"I don't wanna know, I don't wanna know," Daria muttered under her breath like a mantra, two fingers on each hand massaging her temples in a soothing, counter-clockwise rhythm.

"Oh!" With a sense of idiotic pride, Kevin drew himself higher in his seat and grinned at Jane's bemused expression. "I can suck my own!"

There was a moment of stunned silence, then as Jane burst into hysterical laughter a pained expression creased the area between Daria's brows.

If he offers us a demonstration, I'm blinding myself. she thought in amused disgust.

Much to her dismay, Jane asked for an elaboration between guffaws. Kevin explained in his simple, forthright way that he was able to stretch certain parts of his anatomy up to six feet, his current limit, and it made for interesting times when he and his girlfriend were on a break. His dull brown eyes lit up jovially.

"Wanna see?"

Jane grinned. Daria reached for her back pack and started searching for a pencil.

PPMB "Unusual Superpowers" Iron chef
7/22/08