Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter, the last two books would have gone a lot differently.

Last Twelve!

"52 Pickup lines that will NOT get you a date with Lily Evans"

Line #41

"My darling Lily! I must be dead, since I'm seeing an angel!"

"Potter, you are, sadly, not dead."

"How do you know, my sweetest flower?"

"Because you're breathing, but I can, and will, fix that if you don't remove yourself from my sight in the next 30 seconds."

"Evans, you and I both know that you don't mean that! So how about you do us both a favor and go out with me?"

"20, 19, 18…"

"I'm gone!"

Line #42

"Hi Evans! Come here often?"

"You tell me, you are after all both my housemate and my stalker, so do tell, do I come to the Gryffindor common room often?"

"…Maybe."

*Lily rolls her eyes and walks away*

Line #43

"Hey Evans, you and me, tonight at 12:00, my dorm."

"Hey Potter, you and Black, tonight at 9:00, in detention."

"For what!"

"For being a prick. As for Black, he proposed to Professor McGonagall. Again."

Line #44

"Hey honey, what's your sign?"

"'Warning: Prone to hex annoying gits.'"

Line #45

"Hi Tiger-Lily! Di- wait, where are you going?"

"My dorm. To study. It suddenly get annoyingly loud in here."

"I think you forgot something."

"What?"

"Me!"

"Oh, right!"

"Hu- hey!"

*James is thrust into the air by his ankles*

Line #46

"Hello my lovely Lily-flower, how are you today?"

"I was having a nice day. Then you showed up."

"You know I have a question."

"Shoot."

"Shoot what?"

"What's your question?"

"Oh. If I followed you home, would you keep me?"

"Only to feed you to my sister's dog."

Line #47

"You are the sweetest thing since chocolate."

"You are the most annoying thing since mosquitoes."

Line #48

"This could all be yours for one low low price!"

"Sorry, I have much better taste then that."

Line #49

"Hey, is it just me, or are we destined to be married?"

"Trust me, it's just you."

Line #50

"Your lips look so lonely... Would they like to meet mine?"

"Your face looks so lonely…would it like to meet my fist?"

Line #51

"Hey gorgeous, does beauty and smarts run in the family?"

"It obviously doesn't run in yours."

"…does it run in yours?

"If you've ever seen my sister, you'd know the answer."

Line #52

"Can you pull this heart-shaped arrow out of my ass? Some little kid with wings shot me."

"Oh him? That was Peeves. It's apparently his way of celebrating Valentine's day."

"But it's November."

"Try telling him that."

A/N Hey! If I can get 15 more reviews, then I'll throw in a bonus chapter! If I get more then 15, I'll be very happy! C :