A/N: I'm sick of Lily/James clichés.

Emerald Orbs Meet Hazel Eyeballs in Blazing Love

"Oh my Lily Flower! I love you!" yelled James, assumingly to the general world.

"Silly old James," said Remus-and-Sirius fondly.

Actually, no one knows how they tolerated James, who only talked about Lily, who they didn't like.

Lily came into the unspecified room and bitch-slapped James.

"I hate you, you arrogant toe-rag! Stop giving me presents, you bloody prat!" she screamed.

She was an odd girl. Her only apparent interests were showing everyone exactly how much she loathed James Potter and getting good grades.

Her hair was a glorious, thick, wavy, straight, dark-red, orange-red, curly, flowing, gorgeous, pretty, silky, velvety, shiny, soft, bouncy, swaying, sweet-smelling, delicate mass of fibers. She had emerald orbs.

Not green eyes, mind you, but emerald orbs. If you looked into them, you were hypnotized. We suspect this is related to the Basilisk, but science has not found the connection.

I know what you're thinking - she's a Mary Sue!

Nope.

She has faults!

She….um….well….you see…..bites her fingernails. Yeah.

Nasty habit, that.

James stalked her and NO LIFE LITERALLY until the fateful day when all the main characters played truth-or-dare.

In that moment of truth, (A/N: geddit? Hehe. Don't you hate A/N's in the middle of a story? So do I. Sis-ters‼ We are totally soul mates. Meet up for ice cream after this?)

So, in the moment of truth, Sirius-and-Remus dared James to kiss Lily. No one could believe it. It was truly unexpected and shocking.

They kissed. Fireworks flew. The "Hallelujah Chorus" from Handel's Messiah played.

They then dated and married and lived happily ever after. Soon after, a mysterious little kid named Harry popped out of Lily. He had emerald orbs.

Then they DIED.

Except for the kid, who grew up to marry a woman very similar in appearance and temperament to Lily. Hmm.

A/N: You bloody toe-rag! Immortal words…unfortunately.