Collide

Moving On

Graduation Day. Her days at Starfleet academy had finally come to an end. It was a day of ceremonies, pomp and circumstance, and celebration! It was time to move into the future and leave the past behind. Rebecca Anders was ready.

The majority of the graduating cadets were younger by 10 years. They had parents, grandparents and siblings in attendance to see them graduate. She, however, had traveled a different road that eventually lead to a life altering realization and finally enrollment in Starfleet. No one in the crowd of milling people was there for her.

The typical cadet was granted a two week furlough following graduation, prior to reporting for duty. Rebecca had requested immediate assignment. There was no where on planet Earth that she desired to see and no one she needed to visit. The sooner she could get off this rock the better. She was ready to move on.

The shuttle that would deliver her to her new assignment was scheduled to leave at 0800 in the morning. Her few personal belongings were packed and ready for travel. There was nothing to do but wait for morning to come. She had declined an offer of a few classmates to go out for "one last drink together". The sentimentality was lost on her. She preferred to not keep ties to anyone.

Instead, she caught a shuttle to the beach. If there was anything that she might miss about Earth, it would be the ocean. The sound, the smell, the sheer power that the water embodied. Combined, they brought internal peace and a belief in the strength that was within her.

She walked for miles along the shore. The warm sand between her toes giving her a sense of serenity. As the sun dipped into the western horizon, Rebecca sat with her knees pulled to her chest, her arms wrapped around them tightly. Yes, this is what she would miss. The ocean and the breathtaking beauty of the sun sinking into the Pacific.

It was well after sunset when she became aware that she was still sitting in the same place, having been mesmerized by the waves, and lost in the memories of her life. There were few that brought her joy, most only brought emptiness, sadness, anger and a tingling fear. No, she thought, there is nothing else here worth staying for.

She returned to her small dorm at the Academy. Her roommate had long since left on furlough. Her last night on Earth would be spent alone. She preferred it that way. When you were alone, no one could hurt you, no one could touch you, and there could be no additional pain inflicted on mind or body. It was a good trade for the loneliness.

She curled up in bed with a good book trying her best to fight off sleep. The less sleep she got each night the better - fewer dreams to haunt her waking hours. But, as always, sleep finally overtook her. And with it, the dreams that would leave her exhausted physically and emotionally. She would wake up and find new pains and new bruises. And so the cycle would continue.