A blue bird comes to the center of the stage with a white labcoat on. His name is Big the Bird (OC), as he faces the camera and says "Hello & welcome to a brand new story called 'Fanfiction's Deadliest Warrior'! Here, we will take 2 random warriors from 2 seperate dimensions, place them in a random area where no one but them can get hurt, and let them kill each other. So, to let you guys get a feel for this show, we kick it off with our very first fight, which will actually be pretty weird for all of us: Mickey Mouse vs. Bugs Bunny!
(Weapons)
Mickey Mouse:
Sword
Magical Hat
(*Since Mickey Mouse once portrayed a member of the 3 Musketeers, we're allowing him usage of that sword from that movie he was in. Plus, we'll also let him use that hat he used in the movie, Fantasia! *)
Bugs Bunny:
Wooden Mallet
TNT
(*How many cartoons of Bugs have you ever seen of him using a weapon other then just blowing them up on people for comedy relief? He will be given a mallet for a fighting chance. *)
Big soon says to the camera "And now, we'll let them go at it in a area chosen only by the author, and following the fight, I'll explain why the loser actually lost the fight. Enjoy!" Big then presses a button as the screen heads off to the battle.
(*ACME Factory! *)
Mickey Mouse enters the factory, dressed in a Muskeeter costume, as he catches Bugs heading for the exit with a box in hand. Bugs seems confused at first, seeing Mickey in his getup, as Mickey draws his sword while Bugs opens the box in his hand to reveal the Wooden Mallet. Bugs soon asks him "Eh, what's up, doc?" as Mickey charges towards Bugs, who blocks with his mallet while dropping the box. The fight is on!
Bugs uses the mallet to block the swings of Mickey's sword, but this causes Bugs to back away until he ducks, as Mickey's sword strikes a metal poll and causes him to vibrate in a comedic manner. Bugs takes this opportunity to slam Mickey in the face with the mallet, causing Mickey to drop to the ground and causing his sword to fly a few feet away. Bugs soon swings the mallet down upon Mickey, who rolls away in time, causing Bugs to miss. Mickey rolls towards his sword, and gets to one knee, as Bugs sees this in time and starts to back away. Mickey gives chase as the 2, soon enough, find themselves above a vat of green goo called "The Dip!"
The 2 soon continue on with their fight, as this time, Bugs ducks a swing of Mickey's sword, but Mickey's sword soon slashes Bugs's left arm, as he drops his mallet, and it goes flying into the dip. Mickey snickers, as Bugs tackels Mickey down, causing Mickey to drop his sword as well into the dip, with Bugs soon getting kicked off. The 2 stand, as Mickey reveals his magical hat and starts his hand momemts to cause the magic to begin. The dip itself soon starts to rise into a tornado manner, as Bugs suddenly pulls out a smaller bos from a magical pocket on his right side. Mickey stops his arm & hand momemts, as Bugs hands it to Mickey and takes a few steps back. Mickey seems confused, but hears a ticking noise, as he throws the box into the dip and watches it explode. Mickey breathes a sigh of relief, but fails to notice Bugs, who pushes Mickey over the rail & into the dip itself. Mickey rises from the dip for a few seconds, screaming in horrible pain, before succumbing to the pain itself, and sinking into the dip, dead! Bugs takes out a carrot, comically, chews on it's tip, and asks himself "Ain't I a stinker?"
(*WINNER: BUGS BUNNY!*)
The reason Bugs wins is because Mickey Mouse really isn't funny! I mean, seriously: Not once in a damn Mickey Mouse cartoon are you gonna find any mention of a bomb or something like that. Bugs wins because he used the TNT itself as a distraction to beat Mickey.
Big soon sighs and says 'That's it for this episode. See you guys next time, as the fun gets better & better!"