bijoukaiba: Well, what do you know? Is it possible? Have we really reached the final chapter of TCI? I did say this would be a short fanfic, a good summer-long project. Yay!
Disclaimer: House is the property of FOX. Scooby-Doo is the property of Warner Bros. and Hanna Barbera.
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Chapter 4: The Unlikeliest Suspect
"House? What are you doing?" Cuddy asked, briskly exiting her office.
The doctor was walking down the hallway to his office, with Scooby Doo by his side. He stopped when she addressed him, glanced down at his companion, and then back at her.
"Oh, you know. Just going to have a conversation with a cartoon dog. What's so strange about that?" he remarked with a shrug.
"I thought you said you didn't want dogs in the hospital. I don't want them in here either," Cuddy stated, folding her arms.
"I don't. The only exceptions are seeing eye dogs, and ones that speak English. Speech impediments or not," the diagnostic doctor huffed. "C'mon, Scooby."
The Great Dane glanced timidly up at Cuddy, before following the doctor. "… Rokay."
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Daphne stepped quietly outside the hospital for a moment, explaining to her friends that she was going to call her parents because she needed some more comfort after everything that had happened.
The lie worked.
Daphne dialed the number for Dr. Cameron's office. Relieving some of her anxiety, the real doctor answered, not voicemail or a secretary.
"Dr. Cameron speaking,"
"Hello, Doctor? This is Daphne Blake,"
"I had a feeling it was you," the doctor smiled on the other end. "You want to know how everything turned out?"
Daphne nodded, but realized the doctor couldn't see her. "Um, yes!"
"You were negative for any STDs, negative for cirrhosis, and negative for all forms of hepatitis."
"That's good," Daphne sighed with relief. "So… what about my… other test?"
"That one… came back positive."
Daphne fell silent on the other end. She made her way over to a bench and sat down, feeling slightly woozy.
"Miss Blake, don't worry. We offer counseling for this sort of thing. I can give you the number for -"
"It's okay. I should have seen this coming. I don't know if I want counseling just yet. I might need a few days. You know, to wait and see what happens."
"All right. Is that everything you wanted to ask?"
"Yes, Doctor. Thank you. Goodbye."
"Goodbye."
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"Welcome to my office, Scooby Doo. Did you know, it was said that this hospital was built on a plot of land originally intended to be a graveyard? There was only one grave, and my office was built on top of it."
House gestured to a seat in front of his desk, but Scooby didn't move, trembling in fear.
"Ruh-ruh-ruh-really?"
"No, of course not. Sit," House sat down behind his desk, while Scooby Doo sat, human-like, upon a foldable chair.
"I'm no veterinarian, but I thought I'd ask anyway. How have you been feeling, Scooby Doo?"
"Me? Rorried. 'Bout Raggy. But ralso realthy," Scooby replied.
"Of course you're worried about Shaggy. But, you're feeling healthy?"
"Reah," Scooby replied.
"Perfectly healthy. Nothing wrong or unusual?" House interrogated.
"Ruh-uh," Scooby replied. He shifted himself to sit like a dog to scratch behind his ear. House raised an eyebrow.
"I've noticed you've been scratching your ear a lot. Does it itch a lot?"
"Reah," Scooby responded, setting his ear down. "Roes that rount as runusual?"
"Of course it does," House groaned. "Want me to scratch your ears?"
Scooby appeared surprised by such a kind gesture. "Res, rease!"
Unsure of what to expect when he touched the canine, House cautiously laid his hand on Scooby's head. The dog might have appeared animated, but his fur certainly felt realistic. Amazed, the doctor actually stroked Scooby's fur a few times before turning his attention to the dog's ears.
Scooby did not feel the doctor scratching him; rather, his fingers seemed to be gently palpating the area, as though searching for something. House finally stopped after finding a small lump at the base of Scooby's ear.
"'Jinkies!'" House remarked wryly to Scooby, "I think this mystery's all wrapped up."
He stood up and walked over to his desk, where he removed a pair of forceps and a plastic container for lab specimens.
"You're going to feel a little bit of pain, like pinching. I can't offer you any Scooby Snacks, so… just do it for your friend."
"Ror Raggy," Scooby agreed, holding still. He squeezed his eyes shut, wincing in pain as he felt a tough pinch, then a yanking sensation at the base of his ears. Oh, he wanted to howl so badly! But he kept his voice down to a whimper. Suddenly, the pain was all gone. Scooby sighed in relief. His ear didn't feel itchy anymore, but there was some slight tenderness in the base of it.
"There you have it, ladies and gentlemen," House announced to no one in particular. Scooby watched him make his 'speech' to himself. "The culprit is… Mr. Charles Tickens, guilty of Lyme disease!"
Sure enough, Scooby could see a small tick in the grasp of the forceps. The doctor placed the tick into the container and sealed it.
"A rick?"
"Yes, a tick," the doctor replied. "They're mostly found on dogs, obviously, but when humans spend a lot of time with them – like you and Shaggy, for instance – they can climb onto them and make them sick."
"Rut… I ron't reel sick,"
"It's interesting. I've heard sometimes dogs have a good immunity against tick illnesses. If that's true for normal dogs here, who knows what it means for cartoon ones. You might also have just been a middleman – an infected tick climbs on you, you jump on Shaggy when you're scared, tick climbs onto him, bites him, makes him sick. There's probably a bull's-eye rash on one of his shoulders underneath his hospital gown where he was bitten."
Scooby's tail hung between his legs and he sighed sadly. "So… rit's my rault Raggy's sick?"
"No, not at… actually, yes, it probably is," House concluded. "… But it's also thanks to you, that we found out what made him ill, and now we can help him get better."
Scooby's ears perked up, and he wagged his tail with a smile.
"We'll start Rogers on doxycycline. It's a useful antibiotic against Lyme disease and other tick-borne infections," House decided, then looked at Scooby. "And as for your tick problem, try using some specially formulated 'rampoo'."
The dog grinned.
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Shaggy had been more than willing to take the antibiotic – it was oral rather than an injection. It wasn't a miracle pill, as Cameron had explained, but he would definitely start feeling better as the week went by. Perhaps it was a miracle; Shaggy's appetite had returned enough for him to finish his Shaggy Snack, as well as half of his hospital dinner, and he slept well that night. Maybe it wasn't a miracle pill, maybe the idea of feeling better had motivated him enough to eat and sleep.
As he awakened the next morning, he spotted something purple in his room. He stretched his arms with a groan and blinked away his sleepiness. With his eyes clear, he now recognized the figure as the one person – in terms of humans – he wanted to see most.
"Daphne?"
She had nodded off in a chair beside his bed – she must have gotten here early to see him – but stirred at the sound of her name.
"Did you just wake up?" she asked, stretching her arms.
"Like, yeah. I slept all night. Went to bed at ten, woke up at…." He glanced at the clock in his room. "… Nine-thirty."
"Scooby asked me to tell you hello, and to get well soon," Daphne commented.
"And, like, what about Fred and Velma?"
"They were relieved to know that you're going to get better. Now they want to turn attention back to chasing ghosts," Daphne shook her head with a smile. "But Fred and Velma really do wish you the best."
"But you didn't go with them?" Shaggy asked. "Like, you were always the instigator to go solve a mystery when it was just you, me, Scooby, and Scrappy."
"That may be true, but…" Daphne reached down and gently took Shaggy's hand into her own. "… I've learned that some things are more important than solving a mystery."
The tender moment had finally gotten to her. The sensation made her feel like she was going to explode. She found herself telling him what she had kept on her mind for nearly the past two months.
"I still love you," she confessed.
Shaggy summoned his strength to sit up. He gently took her hand into both of his and looked her directly in the eyes.
"I still love you, too," he replied.
Daphne leaned closer to Shaggy.
For the first time in almost seven weeks, she kissed him.
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"Do you think she's told him by now?" Chase asked outside the closed door.
"I don't think so. She said she wanted a few days to think about this. Really, I think she's just focusing on rebuilding her relationship with Norv… Shaggy," Cameron replied.
"Agh… " Chase groaned. "I will be so glad when he finally leaves. If I ever have to watch an episode of Scooby-Doo again…"
They turned from the door and walked down the hallway.
"Well, give them time. Give him time to recover, and give her some time to tell him," Cameron replied. "She might be a little excited, but at the same time, she's probably very nervous about telling him he's going to be a father."
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The Mystery Machine might have had the appearance of a cartoon vehicle, but it still took up a whole parking space outside the hospital. Freddie and Velma sat in the front seat together, already itching to return to solve the mystery at the Evans Mansion. However, someone was making them wait.
"C'mon, Scoob," Fred protested. "He's not gonna come say goodbye."
"Res he is!" the Great Dane countered.
"No, he's not," Velma argued. "He didn't like any of us. The clues add up. He's not going to-"
The sight of the hospital doors opening, and a familiar doctor of diagnostic medicine walking out on his cane silenced her.
"Roctor Rouse!" Scooby cheered.
"Yeah, it's me," Dr. House replied. "Did you want to see me for something?"
"I… I rust really ranted to say… rank rou. Ror relping Raggy."
The animated Great Dane held out a paw to shake. House was surprised by this gesture, but he slowly took Scooby's paw and shook. Despite being a dog, the grip of his paw still felt human, even if it was furry.
"Rou're the rest," Scooby complimented.
"And don't you forget it," House replied.
The Great Dane chuckled, before turning and climbing into the Mystery Machine. House watched in wonder as the animated vehicle drove off, to solve another mystery.
"Scooby-Dooby-Doooo!"
A small smile crossed House's face as he heard the famous cartoon catchphrase just as the van drove out of sight.
It changed to a smirk as he made a note to purchase a box set of the Scooby-Doo cartoons on DVD. Chase's birthday was in a few weeks…
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bijoukaiba: The End! Ehhh, House seemed a bit too "smile-y" at the ending, but then again, wouldn't you be interested at the chance to shake hands with a 'real' cartoon character?
One thing I found interesting is that Cameron was one of the doctors on the show that I didn't pay a lot of attention to, because House's sarcasm is the best, Foreman is a neurologist (I have a neurological disorder), and everyone is distracted by Chase's pretty face. And yet, she played almost as big a role as House did in this fanfic, Foreman did pretty much nothing, and Chase was indirect comic relief. Poor Wilson, he didn't even get a cameo! But, I didn't really have any place to put him…
LOL, I can just see it…. (bonus mini-ending scene)
Two weeks passed since Shaggy was first admitted to the hospital. About three days ago, he was finally discharged after recovering from Lyme disease. He went home healthy and excited at the news that he would be a father. But the major focus right now is on the Princeton-Plainsboro Hospital…
In the doctor's lounge…
Foreman: (takes a slice of cake) Happy birthday, Chase!
Cameron: (swallows a bite of cake) So, how many candles were on your cake this year?
Chase: (wipes his mouth) Eh, I'd rather not count. So, what did you guys get me?
Wilson: (hands Chase a large box wrapped in red paper) House said he was busy with a patient right now, but he wanted you to open this first.
Chase: (starts unwrapping it) It's probably hair gel or make-up, as some sort of joke. (stares at it in horror)
Cuddy: So? What is it?
Chase: (holds up "All Three Seasons of 'The Scooby Doo Show' Box Set") … … … HOUSE!!!
bijoukaiba: Thank you all for reading "The Culprit Is…", have a nice day!