Written for comment_fic on livejournal

The prompt was Chuck/ Casey, swearing

"What the fuck do you think you're doing? What are you, a fucking idiot?"

"Is there really need to speak to me that way Casey? Is there? Is it too much to ask that you speak with just a tiny smidgen of respect for my feelings?"

Casey responded by pinning Chuck against the wall poking him in the shoulder and saying "Oh, I'm sorry, precious little pathetic whiny Chuck, have I offended your virgin ears? Do my 4-letter words scare you?"

"It's not the swearing, it's the mean sentiment behind them. And my ears are not virginal. Unless that means that I've never done anything sexual in my ear, which is true, I never have."

"Well, gosh golly gee, Chuck, I'll make darn tootin' sure that I don't use any mean swears in front of you lest I make your goshdarn sorry ass cry!"

"First of all, there is no shame in being a man who can cry. Second of all, I wouldn't CRY because you insulted me. Even though it does hurt inside. Third, I don't care about the swearing, I care about the fact that you're reaming me out for no good reason."

"Well, I'm so gosh darn sorry, Chuck, but you you know what else hurts inside? Me shoving my gosh darn foot so far up your patootie that your gee-whillakers pop up out of your throat. Was that pretty enough language for you Chuck?"

"It's not the swearing that bothers me, Casey. In fact, I don't give a fuck if you swear until the Urban dictionary pops out of your asshole. I wouldn't give a fuck if you told me that at night you ask old ladies to shit all over your gun so you can lick it off the barrel, and you call it a dingleberry-dog. I wouldn't give a fuck if you told me that you desperately wanted to be double-fucked by Dirty Harry and a guy wearing a Reagan mask, or if you said that Dirty Harry has both a cock and a cunt, and it's a juicy juicy cunt. Seriously, Casey, they don't bother me. They're just words. Right?"

Casey stared speechless at Chuck.

Chuck just smiled and said, "Oh, I'm sorry, Casey. Did I offend your virgin ears? If you want me to talk to you with more respect, just ask."