A Collection of Masks

Drabble Title: Into Acromania

Author: dragnclaw

Rating: T

Theme #: 37. Ice; Prompt Table One.

Disclaimer: Soul Eater and all affiliated characters and ideas are owned by Atsushi Okhubo; I don't make a penny from writing this.

Warnings: Just a bit of blood and gore, and some graphic descriptions of Asura puking up his weapon that some may find disturbing.

Author's Note: I joined 42_souls on LJ a while back, with the hopes of actually getting back into writing, and improving my writing skills. We'll see how it goes, won't we? : )

Also, acromania is a violent form of mania; incurable insanity.

The first time Shinigami felt anything akin to death was when Asura betrayed him.

It had been sudden- no.

No. He knew that it would happen, had been slowly watching Asura fall deeper and deeper into his madness, paranoia, insecurity as he put on more and more clothing… and could ultimately do nothing.

All he really could do was to watch.

He hoped that maybe, Asura would see the errors of his way, and though he was a bit headstrong, Shinigami was, by far, more patient (and could lecture endlessly in his own little ways).

Mah, Asura, doesn't wearing so many sweaters make everything a bit more difficult?

However, expecting something to happen and actually experiencing it are two different things.

"This looks like a good place, doesn't it? Plenty of sun and space….eh, it's a bit out of the way, but we can work around that!"

Truth be told, Shinigami found the desert's heat to be a bit stifling, but it was a last ditch attempt to force Asura back into the land of the sane by making him shed at least a few of his scarves and perhaps slowly but surely introduce him back into society and free him from the fear of interacting with people if he saw how a city and a community was born and grew.

Shinigami knew that it was too late, though. Asura's mental stability was all but gone, and with it, so went the other six Warriors. (He couldn't blame them. He had heard of and seen firsthand the terrible things Asura as means to an end when it came to missions, recently.) It was amazing that he tolerated even Shinigami's presence at this point, but who knew how long that would last?

Asura was a ticking time bomb, and all it would take was one more little thing to set him off completely. It had been difficult enough discussing plans for a school to teach children- You'd only fill their heads with your foolish naivety, Sensei- but, overall, Asura hadn't done anything to prevent him from fulfilling his goal- yet.

Shinigami expected some sort of retaliation- that went without saying at this point in time- but he had not expected Asura attack in a manner so underhanded. He had turned away from Asura, further surveying the desert while awaiting his answer, when Asura struck with one of his skin scarves- hitting the back of Shinigami's neck while he was unguarded.

It looked like that was his answer.

Shinigami staggered from the blow, but as soon as he whirled around to face Asura, the skin-scarf hastily withdrew, and Asura quickly distanced himself from Shinigami with a few spastic moves, radiating nervousness. It was almost as though he didn't believe that he had actually attacked Shinigami and was now denying his own actions as well as Shinigami's existence.

He observed Asura for a few moments, noting his jerky movements, his scarves weaving about him and his eyes darting nervously. He was like a rubber band that had been stretched to its limit, quivering with tension and a moment away from snapping.

This saddened Shinigami. Of all the Warriors, he had known Asura the longest, had had the most conversations (and arguments) with him, and, most importantly, considered him a friend. The realization that he wouldn't be able to save someone he cared for made Shinigami go cold.

That alone hurt him more than any blow Asura could land, and he just watched Asura silently, waiting for the iciness that seemed to spread through his body - down to his very soul- to stop. The further the coldness spread, the more distanced he felt from everything; his body, surroundings, Asura, anyone and everyone he knew, and, ultimately, the world. What was he doing here, in the first place, in the middle of a desolate desert? It was as empty and dead as he himself was becoming. Nobody would join Death in a futile attempt to create peace and life. How stupid is an idea like that? After all, if he couldn't even save a friend, how could he protect anyone else? Isn't Death an end?

But…the loss of one person shouldn't damn everyone else. If anything, it makes everyone else saved all the more important.

Shinigami shook his head; he didn't want to think about anything right now. The wave of coldness continued to seep through his body, making it feel as though his body was turning to stone; it was becoming so ridiculously hard to move- even the thought alone weighed heavily on his mind. It seemed useless to even try.

Paradoxically, he felt so incredibly exposed and fragile, as though the next time Asura hit him- he was sure now that it was the end- he would shatter into a million pieces and disappear. He had never expected such a thing to happen so soon, that he might actually die.

The thought of his own death had never occurred to Shinigami. He was in charge of taking care of souls after a person died, and although he knew he too would die someday, that day always seemed far off-like something intangible that everyone was aware of but never expected to actually happen. Not anytime soon, at least.

But, Asura, who was extremely capable while sane, could, no doubt manage to kill him now. Shinigami felt a pang of regret go through him- finally, a different feeling!- there were so many things left to do. Despite doubting himself, Shinigami did want to start a school, and bring peace, no matter how foolish or difficult it would be. He knew it wouldn't be easy, and that it would be a long time before anything came out of it, but it didn't matter. All that mattered was that he tried, and if anybody else felt the same, they'd find him. He was well known as one of the Eight warriors (although maybe not for the best reasons…), which would no doubt help and all he had to do now was present the opportunity for something better to exist in the world.

Slowly, the mind-numbing cold had started to recede, and he could feel again. It seemed like ages had passed since Asura had attacked him, but he was ready now.

Friends or not, it didn't matter anymore. Either Asura killed him, or he killed Asura. Unfortunately, there was no other choice.

With renewed purpose, Shinigami waited for Asura to make a move again. His silence alone seemed to throw off Asura more than any attack could have, and the more on-edge Asura was, the more likely he was to slip up. Shinigami would use anything he could to his advantage. He couldn't gamble and take a risk on Asura anymore.

"…Aren't you angry, Sensei?" The honorific was spoken mockingly- why haven't you attacked yet?!- and Shinigami was right. Merely by doing something unexpected, he had already increased Asura's paranoia. Not that that wasn't easy enough to do, in the first place.

"No, I'm not…" Shinigami trailed off. It really was sad that it had come to this, and he gave Asura a pitying look- which, no doubt, must have seemed strange combined with Shinigami's terrifying appearance.

Asura scowled at Shinigami's response, his scarves weaving about him in a more agitated manner. Just a little bit more, and he'd attack again. As erratic as Asura had become, he was also so much more predictable. Nevertheless, Shinigami was on guard. You never knew what an insane person would do next, and it would be stupid to underestimate them.

Seeing that Shinigami wouldn't respond, Asura started shaking in fury. It wasn't happening like it was supposed to! Shinigami was supposed to be furious and attack him, so that he could finally kill him! All he needed was a reason; Shinigami was sure to betray him soon, even though he said he never would. People always betrayed you, always. That was why you had to kill them first. It was safer that way, but for some reason, he couldn't kill Shinigami. Not until Shinigami hit him first. Then, Asura would know he was right, that Shinigami was just like everyone else, using him for his own ends. The past didn't matter right now, and the word 'friend' was just a lie to make you drop your guard. He wouldn't fall for such tricks, no matter how innocent Shinigami seemed. He knew he was lying. He knew it!

"Why not?" Asura whined angrily, frustrated. Why couldn't Shinigami do what he was supposed to, for once?

Shinigami had to hold back a bitter chuckle as he spoke. "Because you're my friend, and I'd rather hear your reason for attacking, before retaliating."

Asura choked on air; this wasn't the answer Shinigami was supposed to give! It was all wrong; he was lying. Nobody was that kind.

Nobody!

The sheer bewilderment caused by Shinigami's answer made Asura feel stifled-for once, it was too warm, too bright, too wrong. His scarves flailed about him, unwrapping from around his head as quickly as possible, and he tore at them with his hands to get them away even faster. It was too much, too much and Asura struggled for breath, on the edge of hyperventilating, when it hit him- this was all part of Shinigami's plan!

Bringing him out to this wretched desert, alone, making idle talk about a school- all of it was to get his guard down, so he could attack him! He knew it, he was right all along! Shinigami was no better than anyone else, just sneakier and a better liar. Liar. He should have seen it from the start! How much time had he wasted with him? Years and years filled with lies! All of it was a lie!

With an unintelligible scream of pure rage, Asura reached for Shinigami with all of his scarves, attacking blindly. If the fool thought he could be so easily tricked, then it would be his downfall! He would pay with his soul.

And there it was, thought Shinigami, as he dodged the scarves, just barely. He didn't think calling Asura his friend- it was the truth, after all- would be what would set him off. Asura was no longer just Asura, but the Kishin Asura. There was no going back.

And only then, did Shinigami fully realize exactly how dangerous Asura was- a few scarves had wrapped around the lower part of his cloak, and two others were snaking their way around his arms, attempting to immobilize his body, squeezing him with all the might Asura could muster. It was working, until Shinigami let loose his wavelength with such a force that it made the air crackle with energy, and sent Asura flying backwards, his skin scarves burned and bleeding from wherever they had held on to Shinigami.

Asura hissed in pain, too angry to let his injuries distract him for long, and watched Shinigami warily, keeping his distance for the moment. Shinigami let his soul's wavelength swirl about him, the black tendrils and skull shapes weaving in and out of each other, acting as a protective barrier of sorts. Asura noticed this, and felt his weapon shift in his stomach, one of few things that felt familiar in his life.

"I'm your friend, am I, Sensei? How could you do this, then?" he asked, gesturing angrily to his burns, which had started bleeding profusely. His scarves thrashed angrily, sending blood flying, but Asura paid no attention to that.

"You would do the same," was Shinigami's curt answer. It pained him to be so distanced, but it had to be done. He waited for Asura to attack again, letting his wavelength accumulate around him, and reached out toward Asura, to confirm that he was truly a Kishin now. In a way, it was to reassure himself that what he was going to do was the only choice. As long as Asura was alive, he would be a threat to every single being that existed on the planet, and Shinigami could not allow that. But… at the same time, Shinigami couldn't bring himself to kill Asura, either.

As he let part of his wavelength flow through his cloak and form two long, clawed arms, he sighed softly, taking a look at the desert around him, and then looked at Asura. They had known each other for so long, only for it to end like this. It was truly a pity. A wave of sadness, reminiscent of the freezing cold that had enveloped him earlier, swept over him , and he let it be. The feeling was more than fitting for the situation, the chill heightening his senses, forever embedding these moments in his memories.

He knew this was to be an end. What kind, however, he could not say.

In his anger, Asura gave up on speaking to Shinigami, and regurgitated his weapon, coughing a few times as it rose up through his esophagus and scratched the back of his throat. As soon as it was safely in his mouth, the sides of the vajra securely held in place by his tongue and the roof of his mouth, he lunged at Shinigami with killer intent.

Shinigami waited until Asura was within arm's reach, and then side-stepped him, swiftly grabbing the back of Asura's neck with one of his hands. His other hand grabbed Asura's torso, with his claw-arms securing his hands and feet, while his wavelength enveloped Asura completely, pervading his body. For a split second, Shinigami could feel all of Asura's fear, paranoia, and absolute terror at realizing what was going to happen, and nearly faltered. Asura struggled even more, falling deeper into insanity at being violated in such a way, but he couldn't escape. This was his greatest fear and it was happening. This was what he had spent all his life trying to prevent, and failed miserably.

All Shinigami could do was whisper an apology that he doubted Asura heard as his wavelength slowly started lifting Asura's skin away from his body, effectively skinning him alive in the most torturous way possible. Shinigami knew that it wouldn't exactly be painless for Asura, but by no means did he want to torture him. A part of him wondered if Asura would be better off dead, but it was too late for that, now.

Another mistake, perhaps, but Shinigami couldn't tell anymore. For at this moment, he had ceased to be human, and was just Death; completely detached from what was happening, indifferent.

Another moment passed, and then Shinigami ripped Asura's skin off with a single movement, ignoring the agonizing scream that had escaped Asura. Shinigami kept Asura supported with one hand as he scooped him up in his own skin, and then created a seal using his wavelength to keep him trapped within his own skin.

It was done.

Only then did he let himself stagger. Asura was thrashing wildly in his prison, and the sheer amount of energy it took to keep up the seal was exhausting. Taking a look about himself, Shinigami finally noticed the blood that had been spilt everywhere, that was running down his skeletal hands and dripping from the bag he held. He could not believe that he had….just skinned his friend alive, that he still had hope that Asura could change.

Maybe he really was a fool.

It had been a few days since the battle, and Shinigami was exhausted. He found that he could not move very far from the spot where he and Asura had battled; he expanded so much of his wavelength that the very ground and air there felt as though they were a part of him.

He was permanently bound to the desert.

That was not what bothered Shinigami the most, however. He figured it was only fair after what he had done, and he would most likely spend the rest of his life paying for it, but what bothered him the most was that he could not feel.

After the scalding coldness that had robbed him of his optimism, and his consequent actions that had lead him to shed his humanity, if only for a moment, Shinigami realized that he was having issues feeling any kind of emotion at all. The emptiness within him was vast, and it felt as though something important was missing, but now he couldn't go anywhere to find it. A certain joy that came from simply being alive that had always been present, was gone. He felt inexplicably cold again.

Maybe, in time, the desert would melt the ice that had settled in his bones.