Author's Note: So I wanted to write a story. Originally, I was going to write a Naruto AU that involved Sasuke as a university professor, Naruto as a student, high heels, and wantonness. I'll probably still write that, but then I began to think other thoughts – which were equally as dirty as the thoughts I thought prior to these thoughts – and I found myself wanting to write one of those stories where Naruto is a broke college student working around rich high school student Sasuke's home with barely any clothes on. Yes, original, I know, but oh so delicious … Hopefully. Forgive the ramblings, I'm very sleepy. Enjoy. –DMH

P.S. I know you all hate me for starting this multi-chapter Naruto fic without finishing up my Harry Potter ones … Sorry.

*

The Mower of Lawns

Uchiha Sasuke regarded his newly acquired nose ring with harsh, dark eyes that scrutinized the small, almost onyx dot as if it was not a form of rebellion, but a SAT question. This tiny dot – which was particularly itchy at the moment – created a maelstrom of heartbreak and despair to cloud the four story mansion he lived in … At least, that was what his mother was acting like ever since his father had seen what Sasuke so pridefully did not hide and exploded into a million, nagging little pieces.

His older brother, Itachi, merely grunted when he saw the newest edition to the sixteen year old's face, but, then again, he rarely said much of anything these days.

He supposed it went well with his narrow and slightly pointed nose, but it was not a fashion statement. No, it was a my-father-just-rejected-the-admittance-of-my-true-sexuality-and-now-I'll-make-it-my-mission-to-anger-him-in-every-little-way statement. He flicked the itchy piece of jewelry even though he knew he was not supposed to touch it and leaned even closer to his bathroom mirror to examine whether or not it made him look any gayer.

His friends assured him that it would when he got it, but it was not until he strolled into school after the lunch period he had skipped to get the piercing that he was practically positive of the gayness the little dot emitted. Any girl in the school who was not already in love with him managed to squee excessively and the drama club began to follow him around and the assistant football couch somehow memorized his schedule with the excuse to see if Sasuke would be interested in any kind of tryout. Yes, because Sasuke so lived for the sport of football.

He finally left his bathroom and laid across his bed, stretching languidly and playing with the nose ring with the tip of his pinky finger for about an hour before he decided the two o'clock was long enough for him to oversleep on a Saturday and got up to slink downstairs; shirtless, shoeless, and gay.

He passed several windows which were freshly cleaned and shined and reflected his slightly transparent figure back at him. Perhaps he should get more piercings, a nipple or his lip? He shrugged to himself and continued down to the kitchen in only his new and almost unbearably tight skinny jeans and nose ring. He passed Itachi somewhere along the way and, without glancing at one another, they grunted in greeting. He finally made his sluggish way to the kitchen and immediately went to the fridge. The taste of fresh orange juice assaulted him as he down about half a gallon of it and left the carton open and on the counter. A lawnmower he had not even noticed had been running until it stopped suddenly stopped and he glanced absently out the window. It was not until his brother rushed into the kitchen, flung open the fridge, retrieved a bottle of water, and ran out the side door and to the lawn that he made a double take at the thing on the lawn. This thing, of course, was a person and this person, of course, had been the one manning the lawnmower a moment before, but was now accepting a cold bottle of water from Itachi. This person, this lawn mowing person was talking animatedly with his hands and splashing the newly opened water everywhere as Itachi watched and was splashed. The hot summer sun beat down on the conversing pair; Sasuke's usually silent brother who was pale and skinny and covered from head to toe in black and the lawn mowing blond and golden epitome of every reason Sasuke was gay from his bared (and glistening!) muscles to the old and faded jeans that hung low on narrow hips.

His smile was big and white, his arms were big and bronzed, his hair was big and gold, and his eyes – from what Sasuke could see of them – were big and – he guessed – blue. Like a Technicolor gift from the gods, this lawn mowing person had appeared on his front lawn half naked and perfect and Sasuke almost did a happy dance before he realized that the blond was still talking to Itachi. Oh, and that Uchihas never happy danced. Never.

Obviously, Itachi knew the nearly nude lawn mower and the two looked the same age, meaning that the blond probably attended school with his brother. But that would mean that he was also a spoiled rich kid and it was unlikely that a spoiled rich kid would be tending other spoil rich kid's lawns … Perhaps, he worked where Itachi worked, interning in the executive branch at … No, that was even more unlikely; the blond did not seem too smart, even from this distance. The only explanation Sasuke could even begin to imagine was that this lawn mowing person was his brother's lover and this explanation was the most unlikely of all because that would suggest that his brother was human in some way.

However the blond knew Itachi, he understood the way his brother was looking at him through hooded eyes and he wanted nothing more to run out on the lawn barefoot and in his skinny jeans to stop the visual raping of this completely ignorant man. But, fortunately for Sasuke's dainty, vulnerable feet, the blond finally downed the water, capped the empty bottle, and handed it back to the non-sparkling vampire before waving and striding over to the abandoned lawnmower. Itachi watched the man's back almost wistfully – well, Sasuke assumed that the look could possibly be wistful, but that suggested that Itachi had emotions – and the brunet pocketed the empty plastic in his oversized hoodie and walked away.

*

Sasuke was grateful for once that his house was so damn big; it made the stalking all the much more easy. The blond appeared to be around six feet tall … then again, Sasuke was pretty tall himself and currently hiding in the bushes so the blond's size could possibly vary. His hair was a rich color, like spun gold with streaks of sunshine and sun bleached white. His eyes were definitely blue; when zoomed in as close as possible, the pictures on Sasuke's iPhone confirmed it. And there were muscles everywhere. Sasuke patted his flat, but definition-less stomach with envy as he drooled over each individual ab and sinewy bicep that flexed and tensed under that sun-kissed golden brown skin.

Sasuke wanted to eat him.

Wearing nothing more than work boots, faded jeans, and the blue boxers those jeans kept slipping to reveal, the blond marched around whistling and picking up things and fixing things and bending over and – Sasuke almost had a heart attack when his ringtone began to blast from the bushes and the blond looked his way. He shut it off after two and a half seconds and a struggle with his tight ass pants, but he was positive the blond had heard it … How could he not have? However, the blond stuck a hand into his own pocket and pulled out a beat up old phone to stare at. He made a face of confusion and dialed a number, then put the phone up to his ear.

"Hey Babe," he said, his voice rich and deep as Sasuke had imagined it, but raspy in a way he almost did not like. "Yeah … I forgot to call you earlier … No … You wanna do it tonight? … I said tonight … I want to see you … Fine … Yeah, fine – Fine! Bye!"

The blond flipped the phone closed and grumpily tossed it aside onto the grass as he made his way to the front of the house. Sasuke stared at the discarded phone from the bushes. And stared and stared and stared.

"I will not look in it," he whispered to himself before he stood from his crouched position and walked over to the device. He picked it up and stared at it. It was small and blue and outdated. He bit his lip and glared at the little device in his palm as if it was the reason the gardener paid no attention to him, regardless of the hiding required for his stalking of the last three days. He bit his lip and tickled the skin beneath his nose ring with his free hand before he finally flipped open the phone and immediately went to recent calls. He needed to know who that moron mower of lawns was talking to and why they were called 'Babe'. He found the last call and the name listed beneath it was 'Babe'. Sasuke growled and almost threw the phone at the side of the house, but instead opted to toss it on the grass where it had been before.

Who in the fudge-knuckles was this 'Babe' person?!!!

He stomped around the house until he found a door, flung it open and stomped into the house. His father was leaning against a kitchen counter and, as if waiting for him to pass, straightened and reached out to his son with a gruff, "Sasuke –"

"Still gay!" the young brunet grunted as he added extra swivel to his step and runway walked out of the kitchen and away from his father. He took the epic journey up four flights of stairs to his bedroom, passing Itachi along the way with a mutual grunt of greeting, and plopped down on his bed to stare up at the ceiling to wonder vaguely that if he painted the white expanse black, would he appear all the more angsty.

He stood and looked out his window and saw the small garden on the side of the house that lead to the bigger one behind the house … where the lawn mower usually worked in the afternoons. He stood, rummaged through several bags until he found a Dean Koontz novel and a pair of sunglasses. He crowed in triumph and rushed down four flights of stairs, presenting Itachi with an excited grunt as they passed, and calmed himself enough to walk with poise from the house out of the back door and into the small garden. He found a seat on a cool stone bench underneath a rather large tree and stretched across it to read. A few moments of pretend reading later, a loud clinking noise alerted him of his target's arrival.

"Oh, hey Itachi," the deep voice rasped and Sasuke mildly wondered if the other man smoked as he lifted his head and looked into the most dazzling pair of eyes he had ever seen. The blond's gaze widened as he hitched the heavy green hose he had looped over his shoulder a bit higher. "Oh damn, you're the other one, right?"

"Sasuke," Sasuke said flatly, not much liking the 'other one' comment.

The mower of lawns flushed slightly under his sun-darkened complexion and reached a hand up to scratch nervously behind his head. "Sorry. I've just never seen you before, but I knew that the family had another son and sorry for calling you Itachi."

Sasuke merely blinked at the other before looking back to his novel.

"So … I'm Naruto, by the way."

The morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy … and Naruto was his name. Sasuke's soul whimpered a little.

"Fishcake?" the brunet asked, pushing his glasses down his nose until the dark metal of his piercing stopped them.

Naruto presented him with a hearty bark of laughter as he allowed the coil of hose to fall from his arm and onto the ground. "I was actually named after a character in my pervy godfather's novel that he came up with while eating ramen."

O, speak again, bright angel!

"Ramen?" Sasuke scrunch his nose up in disgust, but made sure he did it in a cute way.

"Yeah, ramen! Don't tell me you don't like ramen!" Those liquid sapphire eyes lit up with the hopes that Sasuke loved the sodium drenched, carb filled debauchery of a meal as much as he and Sasuke could have sworn that those eyes dimmed a bit when he shook his head no. "You don't?"

"Sorry," the Uchiha said with a slight shrug as he turned his direction back to his book.

"Well, damn. Maybe I should take you to a ramen stand or something 'cuz you're obviously not eatin' the same ramen I'm eatin'!" Dark eyes looked up at him with open shock after the statement and his face immediately crumpled into a frown of worry. "Oh, I'm sorry if that's out of line. I was just –"

"No, I'll go with you!" Sasuke blurted as he bolted straight up from his lounging position.

"You will?" Naruto asked, confusion heavily blatant in his expression.

"You invited me, correct?"

"I think so …"

"So I'll go with you."

"Now?"

Sasuke forced a shrug and looked away from the blond and back down to the book he could no longer remember the title of. "Whatever you want to do."

"Well … ah … I'm free to leave in about an hour or so … so …"

"So in an hour?"

It was Naruto's turn to shrug and he nodded a bit. "I guess. Um, I'll have to take a shower and stuff, so I'll stop by my apartment and come back after."

"Sure," Sasuke said softly as he turned the page he had pretended to read.

"Okay then." Naruto nodded, still slightly confused, and bent to pick up the hose. "See you."

"Hn," Sasuke grunted, but – on the inside – he squeed a little.

*

He had changed into his new skinny jeans a.k.a. his second skin and an equally tight t-shirt that told the world that he was not wearing any underwear along with his favorite pair of Vans and he waited and waited and waited until a soft knock sounded on the back door. He bounded to the door, composed himself before opening it and opened it to reveal Naruto. And all the angels shouted – Boo, he had a shirt on.

Naruto had on a pair of baggy jeans that looked just as old as his work ones and only slightly less dirty and a bright orange shirt that was large and hung on his chiseled frame unbecomingly. Sasuke almost pouted until he realized that the blond's beautiful arms were still visible.

"Ready?" Naruto asked with a bright smile as his eyes flicked down to the other's t-shirt; his smile only widened.

"Hn," the Uchiha grunted as he pushed past the blond and out of the door. He quickly pushed the thought of 'ItouchedhimItouchedhimItouchedhim!' out of his head and strolled to the driveway, taking full advantage of the fact that Naruto was behind him by establishing his runway walk. When they reached the end of the long driveway, Sasuke was surprised to see a modest Honda Civic.

The surprise must have been evident on his face because Naruto then said, "Sorry about that. I have my Dad's car. Mine is in the shop. It's always breaking down."

The brunet nodded and walked over to the passenger side, climbing in as the door was unlocked and suddenly finding himself in a confined space with the mower of lawns. Every stalker's dream.

As soon as Naruto turned the key in the ignition, Nirvana began to blast through the car and jolted them both before the blond turned the volume down. "My fault," he said with a chuckle. "I've been listening to this song for like a week. I'm obsessed with it."

Sasuke did not mind that too much, but sitting beside the blond for the next ten minutes as he constantly sung the words 'rape' and 'me' for an innumerable number of times was possibly bad for his heart.

"So, how old are you, Sasuke?" the man asked when he –finally! – stopped singing.

"Sixteen."

"What is that? Tenth grade?"

"I'm a junior. I'll be seventeen soon," the teen answered, careful to throw that last fact out there for the blond to digest. Naruto hummed in understanding and slowed the car to a stop as they reached a red light. He turned to Sasuke and smiled crookedly. "What?"

"Nothing … You just … Nothing," Naruto snorted as he zoomed the car forward to cut off a guy who then, enthusiastically, gave him the finger.

"What?"

Naruto merely shrugged and began to sing about getting raped again until the car swung haphazardly into a small parking lot. A large sign on the tiny building in front of them read Ichiraku and Sasuke could see why the place appealed to the blond. It was loud and tacky with bright red strips falling straight from the roof to the ground and the oversized sign that the brunet just knew would glow some horrible neon color at night. The place really looked as if it used to be a liquor store or a small strip club or something, but Sasuke was willing to accept it since it was his first outing with the gardener.

Naruto held the door open for him when they walked into the restaurant. God, Sasuke thought, it's worse than Jack in the Box. It smelled, God, it smelled … like ramen. This was to be suspected, but the brunet had not expected the odor to smack him right in the nostrils as soon as he walked through the door. He felt Naruto's hand, large and hot, push at the small of his back to get him out of the doorway and he shuddered violently because of the action, causing the blond to furrow his brow in concern. Sasuke ignored him of course and briskly walked over to the counter to sit down so that his newly wobbly knees would not knock him down. He allowed the lawn mower to order for him and tried not to grimace as he and the owner of the shop began to argue over the best ingredients for ramen. Finally, the owner's daughter came back with two large bowls and set them in front of each man while giving her father a sharp glare for not helping before flouncing away.

"Eat it," Naruto finally said after five minutes of emptying his own bowl as Sasuke's remained full and untouched.

"Why?"

"Because I'm paying for it, so eat up."

A pale hand lifted slim, twin sticks and stabbed them into the pile of steaming noodles and broth. The sticks rose from the bowl, adorned with flavor tanned noodles that dripped and emitted something that seemed to make Naruto drool at them. Finally, the newly captured ramen was taken to pale pink lips, pushed past and slurped down. Sasuke said nothing, only pretended to stare at the bowl as that wonderful thing called peripheral vision took in the sight of Naruto's anticipating expression.

"Well?"

"You want this?" As soon as the words past his lips, Naruto was face deep into the bowl, inhaling the ramen like a stoner with some blueberry yum-yum on 4/20 until it was gone twenty, perhaps twenty-five minutes later. Then the tanned one had the nerve to look at him innocently."Do you eat here every day?"

"Yeah."

"How are you not a blimp?!"

"I can't fly?" Naruto offered with a shrug of his shoulders. Sasuke groaned and stood.

"Pay so we can leave."

"Well, aren't you bossy?"

"Yeah, well, I'm ready to see your apartment."

Naruto's face froze almost comically before sliding into an adorable blank expression until something registered in his brain and confusion overwhelmed him. "My apartment?"

"What? You don't have one?" Sasuke asked as he watched the blond hand the owner a few bills to pay for the meals.

"Yeah, um, I do, but … I didn't know you wanted to go there."

"Well, now you do," the Uchiha informed him happily. "Otherwise, it would have been awkward, without you being prepared and all. Do you live close?"

"About a minute or so away by car."

"Let's go," the teen ordered as he strolled out of the restaurant. He was leaning against the passenger side of the car with a small smile on his face that caused Naruto to frown when he stepped outside himself. The blond scratched the back of his head and opened the Civic's doors with a press of a button. They drove silently; Naruto did not even sing about the sexual act Sasuke really wanted to do to him, despite the music that was blasting. Sooner than Sasuke thought, they were parked in front of a small apartment complex. It was two stories tall with chipping, painted walls and broken, unleveled sidewalks. He followed Naruto up the small flight of stairs and was stopped at the first door when they reached the open balcony. The blond unlocked the door and stepped back, holding the door open for the younger male and allowing Sasuke the first glimpse of a room filled with darkness and smoke. He gulped nervously and mentally scolded himself for acting like a child before he forced his legs to propel him forward. Unfortunately, his knees seemed to be ill-informed and, instead of bending so that he might take a proper step, they locked into place and his straight legs almost sent him toppling to the ground had Naruto not caught him.

"Hey, be careful. I forgot to tell you about the step." Sasuke looked down and, sure enough, there was a small step. Thank God, he thought, mentally berating himself for almost looking foolish. Naruto pushed past him through the doorway and felt along the wall for something. "Why is it so dark in here?!" he called out, his voice raspy and strong and shiver-inducing. "Freaking vampires!" He found what he was looking for and the lights popped on, revealing a small living room connected to a small kitchen. In the kitchen was wedged a small table with two chairs; all three items of furniture were covered by something, old plates, papers, or clothing, but in the small living room, there was only a couch, a chair, and a ridiculously large television that was playing what looked like a French movie. On the beat up, faded brown couch were draped two figures, one snoring and one peeking up towards the doorway as he lay on the other.

Naruto walked into the room, leaving Sasuke to follow after shutting the door and leaned over the back of the couch to give the peeker a chaste kiss on the lips. The freshly kissed redhead flushed a bit and muttered a hello. "Hey, Babe."

At the nickname, Sasuke immediately narrowed his eyes at the other man despite the other man's straddling position on the man sleeping on the couch. And seriously, the man was beautiful. His features were delicate, every single one of them. The fingers that curled over the back of the couch were long and thin and covered with skin that looked as pale and as smooth as cream. His red hair was like the burst of a red star around his head, falling in soft spikes that framed him beautiful face. The lips Naruto had pecked were a light pink, the upper more full than the lower, and the nose above them was dainty and slightly pointed. But those eyes … even if everything else about him was hidden away or covered in grime, his eyes made him beautiful. Like aqua, like liquid, they stared back into Sasuke's harsh glare as cold and as hard as a gem; aquamarine or turquoise, maybe.

"Sasuke, this is the Babe; Gaara, this is Sasuke," Naruto said absently as he toed his shoes off. "The lump under him is Sai, my roommate." Sasuke merely nodded, but continued to stand in the doorway until the blond looked up at him. "Well, make yourself comfy. Do you want anything to drink? Water? Pop? A beer?"

"Water's fine," the brunet said as he tapped his nose ring nervously and stepped across the room to the only empty seat; the chair beside Gaara and Sai.

"You're young," Gaara said as soon as he plopped down into the seat. For such a small, weak looking guy, his voice was sure deep and creepy, deeper than Naruto's rasp, even. "How young?"

"Sixteen," the blond called from the kitchen as he rummaged through the fridge. Sasuke blushed under the redhead's scrutinizing gaze, especially now that the man had laid his head back down on the other's sleeping chest. "He's Itachi's brother."

"Itachi?" Gaara replied, saying the name as if tasting chocolate. "Hn."

"Exactly," Naruto laughed as he walked out of the kitchen and pulled Sai's feet up to sit under them. "Hn." He handed Sasuke a bottle of water before gulping down his own. "We're running out of ramen."

"Sai has been giving it to homeless people," Gaara replied as he trailed his fingers down the pale arm revealed by Sai's tank.

"Why would he do that?!" the blond barked, pinching the bottom of Sai's feet and causing the tall man to squirm.

"He said that only people with penises deserve to eat ramen." Naruto shoved hard at the sleeping man's feet, causing Sai to topple off of the couch. Gaara, remarkably, managed to stay on it and watched with a blank expression as the other climbed off of the floor. The freshly awoken man muttered something incoherently and then something that sounded like "dickless" before walking out of the room and disappearing all together. The redhead stood and looked at Naruto.

"We're going to have sex now." He turned his aqua gaze to Sasuke. "We're going to be loud."

He, too, then disappeared, leaving Naruto the entire couch and Sasuke entirely bright red.

"Sit over here, Sasuke." The young Uchiha jerked at the sudden address and merely stared at the other. Naruto smiled reassuringly and nodded. He hesitated a moment, cursing himself for thinking that this whole going to Naruto's apartment thing was going to be a good idea, and stood. The blond patted the space right beside him, despite the entire length of the couch and, when Sasuke sat, his arm draped along the back, behind the brunet. "So … sixteen, huh?"

"Yeah … I turn seventeen next month," he hastily added as he attempted to keep his eyes on the foreign film that lit the television before him.

"Seventeen? I'm twenty … That's a three year difference until I turn twenty-one in October."

"Yeah?" Sasuke said as the faint pants of the other pair finally floated into the nearly silent room. The volume of the French movie was low, so the creak of the couch cushions sounded all the much louder as Naruto moved closer to him.

"Yeah …So, I was graduating high school when you were still in middle, huh?"

"I guess."

Naruto chuckled and Sasuke shivered a bit when the hand that fell over the back of the couch gently pressed its fingers into his neck. The action seemed to bring him closer to Naruto's descending mouth and when soft lips pressed against the side of his face, right above his ear lobe, his shivers turned into fierce trembles and he held his eyes close to compose himself. The kisses led to the line of his jaw as the gentle fingers turned his head. Slowly, lips were pressed against his and his first kiss was taken. God, it was sweet. The soft presses focused on his bottom lip before moving to the top one, surrounding each pale pink line of flesh and tugging gently to make that perfect smacking noise. The loud moans of Sai and the redhead filled the air as Sasuke allowed himself to be pressed back onto the couch. One large tan hand cupped his face while the other busied itself at his hip, causing him to lift up and press himself against the other.

Fingers threaded into his hair, pulling his hair back, and causing him to gasp. He panted openly into the air as kisses were pressed into his neck and moaned a bit when Naruto licked at a certain spot.

"That's good?" Naruto asked, kissing back up to him mouth to swallow Sasuke's answer before the teen could give it. The blond's tongue tasted sweet against his despite his sodium filled diet, so Sasuke continued to moan into the kiss. His hands found purchase in blond hair and at the nape of Naruto's neck, pulling them both deeper into one another.

Naruto tasted so good!

And was hard against him, pressing himself and grinding himself into Sasuke's arousal until it was all the brunet could do to not call out and beg. Suddenly, a vibration between the two of them had them jerking apart and Naruto sat up to pull his phone out of his pocket. He had obviously gotten a text message and cursed softly when blue eyes quickly scanned it.

"Damn, sorry," he told Sasuke as he stood and pocketed the phone. "I gotta go. I'll give you a ride home."

"Where are you going?" Sasuke forced himself to ask so not to focus on the pain of the giant erection in his pants. And, of course, to drown out the screaming in the next room. As soon as Naruto's back turned, he winced and tugged violently at the front of his snug skinny jeans. Stupid skinny jeans.

"Work."

"Where do you work?" he asked as he followed Naruto out the door and down the stairs.

"My godfather's bookstore downtown." Sasuke nodded and remained silently as they climbed into the car. He glanced over at the blond and noted how swollen and pink the man's lips were. He licked his own, tasting a foreign, but pleasurable taste that made him want to close his eyes and remember. "We're here."

The brunet jumped in surprise as all thoughts came flooding back into his head and he realized that they were, in fact, in front of his house. "Oh … thanks."

"Anytime," Naruto said with a smile, leaning over to peck Sasuke on the lips before unlocking the door. "See ya."

"Bye." Sasuke stepped out of the car and began the long walk up the driveway, determined not to turn and look back at the car.

As soon as he heard the screeching of tires, he turned.

*

Author's Note: So, I totally just posted this thing despite the fact that I need to be studying for my Othello test in my English 520.01 Shakespeare course and it is 1:30 in the morning. Oh well … I never wanted a college degree anyway … Anywho, for all the young whippersnappers reading this story (cuz I know you are, you little pervs, lol) this really is how college boys are, well maybe not Gaara or Sai, but how Naruto is, that's how college boys are … or any male around that age, I guess. If you felt like something was off about that make out scene, you are correct! Now, Naruto is not going to be a villain in this story with Sasuke as his beautiful hostage that he ties to the railroad tracks, but I want this relationship between them to be real, so there's a little of my experiences and some of my friends and some made up others that will be in this story. –DMH

P.S. There may or may not be a lime in the next chapter.

P.P.S. I love Sai, even though his only line in the chapter may or may not have been "dickless."

P.P.P.S. I really, really need to study now. Love you guys!