Disclaimer: I own none of the characters, few of the plotlines, etc., etc.

I saw your sky fall down today
Suddenly turn from blue to gray
'Til one by one the raindrops
Turned to tears upon your face

Matthew West

For a heartstopping moment she can't remember where she is. She's in the basement, hiding, only she's not, because it's too familiar, and besides she can hear Elliot, it's crowded and he's yelling, but that's not right either because she's not moving, she ought to be shaking with anger or fear but she's not, she's not –

"Hey, Liv."

That's real, she calculates in an instant; that's real and the voices in her head are not. Olivia blinks at the shadowy underside of the top bunk and suppresses a sigh. Usually the dreams are better in the crib. She feels drained, as though she's been living two or three nightmares at once.

"Liv," the voice hisses. Elliot.

"D'I have to get up?" she murmurs.

"No."

"Then go 'way. I'm takin' all my time."

"Take it at home. They picked up Cotone over on 68th."

She summons the energy to turn her head toward him. "So you woke me up to tell me to sleep?" Not that she minds escaping the dream, but even half-asleep she has to poke fun at his logic.

"Yes," Elliot says unrepentantly, heading past her towards the lockers.

"Go away," she repeats. "I'm not moving."

"Have it your way," he calls over his shoulder.

Thanks, I will. Olivia closes her eyes – God, but it's been a long few days – and, hearing the comforting sounds of her partner banging around in the locker room, slips quickly toward sleep.

It's been a very long chase, Elliot thinks wearily, squinting into the depths of his locker. Their work isn't over yet, of course, but now that Robert Cotone's off the streets – before having the chance to snatch another little girl – at least they can all catch some serious sleep. He extracts his coat and the rolled-up newspaper he abandoned – yesterday? Two days ago? Apparently his brain shuts down the moment he doesn't actively need it.

Maybe he should crash in the crib too. For a moment he thinks jealously of his partner, who is probably dead to the world by now. But no. He owes his family an appearance, at the very least. Maybe he'll get home in time to take an afternoon nap with Eli; they both get a kick out of that. Once last week he woke up with an arm draped over his son and Kathy and Lizzie standing in the doorway, wearing identical soppy expressions. You are too cute, Lizzie said, giggling.

Contemplating such things, Elliot smiles to himself and heads out, banging his paper absently against the bars of the bunks as he passes. He barely makes it halfway to the door before he is jolted from his reverie by a voice yelling, "Fuck!"

Two beds ahead of him, Olivia bolts upright, gasping for breath. He can feel himself gaping at her, shocked; it takes him a beat to realize that it must have been her voice – the tone was far too close to afraid to be his partner.

"Liv?" he ventures.

"Don't. Do that," she says tersely.

"Do what? Walk?" He sits on the bed by her feet, mind racing with possibilities. He startled her? She was having a nightmare? Both? She's still breathing hard; when he goes to touch her shoulder she jerks away so fast that his stomach turns over. Liv.

"Just don't," she snaps.

Well, he wants to retort, that's very informative. He jams his hands under his thighs to keep himself from reaching for her. "Liv. I can't stop until you tell me what I'm doing wrong." He waits, but she just sits there looking at her own lap. "Liv?" He tries to make his voice as gentle as possible. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

She shakes her head sharply and glances up at him. "Go home, El." When he looks skeptical she adds, "I'm fine."

"Just don't do that?" he guesses, and she smiles slightly.

"Class dismissed."

"Yeah, except I still don't know what I'm not supposed to do."

Olivia picks up the newspaper that he's dropped between them and hits him on the head with it.

"Geez," he says, snatching it back. "I'm going already."

Fuck, she says to herself after he leaves, flopping back onto the bed. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Damage control. Does she need damage control? Or will he brush this off?

He could forget about it. Hopefully. Oh, she should have looked him in the eye, she should have said something witty, but she didn't have it in her. He'd have seen it in her eyes if she'd let him look, and she can't have that.

Probably he's forgotten already. She doesn't know whether to be relieved or depressed at this thought. Relieved, she eventually decides, because really it works in her favor. The man's on his way home to his family, after all. That's more important.

Oh, she can't stay here anymore; she's awake now. She'll go home and crash in her own bed. Yes. Meanwhile Elliot's forgetting about this, tomorrow they'll both act as though nothing ever happened, and it'll be okay. It'll be okay. She repeats this to herself because there's no-one to say it to her.

Olivia gets up, slowly, because she's remembering a time when she could confess to her partner and it takes energy to remember that far back. She used to be able to say to him, I made a mistake. God, it would feel so good, to let the weight settle on someone else's shoulders, just for a moment….

No. She checks herself right there and digs her shoes out from under the bed. This is where the vicious circle starts again, with wanting… it's impossible. How stupid, to have moved past Sealview only to get hung up on this.

TBC...

Hold on tight; this will get interesting. And please review!