Disclaimer: Ouran High School Host Club and all of its characters belong to Bisco Hatori; this is just a shameless work that isn't for profit.
Notes and Warnings: This story involves heavy doses of twincest and is some... fairly shameless self-indulgence. I also ran away with a luxury shower 'idea' (actually, it's based on one I've seen before). Let's see, what else. If you haven't read from about chapter 45-ish through chapter 69 of the manga, there's going to be some spoilers in here for you. Also, this came to about 25-and-a-quarter pages long, so I'd suggest grabbing a cup of tea and maybe a sandwich if you're going to be reading in one sitting.
In Place of Modesty
by Josie (artes)
It all started with what he mistook as an innocent suggestion.
Really, it shouldn't have surprised him in the slightest that the whole thing had been cooked up. That he'd managed to walk into such a cleverly-placed trap - although, in retrospect, he realized that it wasn't particularly clever at all; when had either of them ever made an innocent suggestion, after all? He'd just, for some reason that he couldn't quite place, not taken the mischievous look in golden eyes identical to his own as anything out of the ordinary. After all, where they were concerned, mischief - or, as they liked to put it, creative expression - was a given. It was the norm. Questioning that look in his twin's eyes would have been about the most abnormal thing that he could have done. No, if anything, it would have made his brother suspicious of him.
That was something that - as he knew from experience - never ended well.
Of course, thinking on it further, it probably had something to do with the fact that they had just woken up. Yes, if he hadn't still been so groggy, he certainly would have seen the wheels turning in that devious head that mirrored his own, coming up with some wicked form of torment. It was too late to regret his inattentiveness now, however. Far too late.
Well... really, if he was honest, it'd been too late three weeks before that morning ever arrived. Three weeks ago, when things had suddenly gone and taken a sharp turn towards 'too far.'
. . .
Irritation had never sat well with Hikaru.
Most people never bothered to look closely enough to notice this fact, but it was the truth, nevertheless. It was the core of why, if he was involved, discontent had always led to some shouted, childish outburst of anger, a reaction that Kaoru had patiently tried to train out of him (although, when he looked back on it, Hikaru couldn't help but wonder if Kaoru's 'help' hadn't been some form of cruelty; it wouldn't be the first time that one or both of the twins could be accused of bearing some sort of sadistic streak within him, and it most certainly wouldn't be the last, either). It had come in the form of a penalty game of storing a feeble one hundred yen into their raccoon-shaped bank for each time that he could withhold from an outburst for three minutes and thus diffuse his rage. This procedure, Kaoru had decreed, must be repeated one thousand times. "Hikaru, you're such a hothead, there's no way it'll help you if you do it any less than this." That had probably been the first time he'd ever come close to wishing true, physical harm onto his younger twin. But Kaoru was only trying to help, so he'd squelched the urge and agreed to the terms. Not that it did anything to stop the seemingly involuntary twitch every time that Kaoru appeared to exude some sort of twisted joy out of seeing him squirm as he pulled him aside and started the stopwatch that he'd begun to carry around, or each time he added some sort of 'assignment' for him to complete if he did have an outburst.
"You won't win, the way you are now," was what Kaoru had said to him. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Hikaru knew that his twin was right, that if he wanted to get anywhere, he'd have to curb his natural urge to shout first and worry about the feelings of whoever was in the way of his warpath later, but even knowing that on some level didn't stop his frustration from growing. This - all of this - had started after Kaoru had said that he would do whatever he could to help him win Haruhi over; time had passed, he'd learned to control himself better (certainly, no one could expect him to be perfect about it just yet, could they?), and the situation had, in its own way, evolved. Oh, there were feelings there still, that was for sure.
However, more than feelings of whatever sort, he was realizing rather quickly that old habits died hard. This was, perhaps, a piece of the puzzle that Kaoru hadn't considered.
That in and of itself was odd, if Hikaru were to honestly consider it. On the other hand, it did leave an opening for him.
It started simply enough: all he had intended to do was push the envelope a little. It was payback, pure and simple - payback for his copper-haired little brother's apparent entertainment at his expense. It wasn't too drastic, certainly not something that was too far beyond anything they'd ever done to each other. That was the plan, at least.
His plans usually worked out flawlessly, however twisted they were. 'Usually' being key. There were a few occasions where they hadn't, but he'd always chalked it up to some simple bad luck, never seeming to notice that any flawed performances of his were ones that hadn't been planned out to the very last letter with Kaoru by his side, laughing in a way that made anyone in hearing range cringe and run for cover. It was nothing short of unmistakable to most by now, that shared chortling by the Hitachiin twins which could only mean that the devilish duo was cooking up some diabolical scheme, and no one wanted to be around when it came to fruition.
Yes, a plot by Hikaru and Kaoru was a dangerous tool. Then again, a plot by just one or the other could be, as well, if the scheming twin would only take his own shortcomings into account. Kaoru always did, on those exceptionally rare occasions that he bothered to plot without his older brother. Hikaru didn't.
Which was why his otherwise flawless machinations were consistently doomed to take anyone caught in their path through twists and unexpected turns before he ever put them into motion.
Hikaru would never be mistaken for a patient person. No, it seemed Kaoru had taken the lion's share of that particular trait, so much so that his older twin had been left with only the most minuscule scraps of it. This was why, in the event that he did plan anything without his brother, Hikaru generally wasted no time in enacting whatever his scheme was; this was especially true when it had something to do with his twin. Kaoru knew this - there was no way that he couldn't, knowing his brother so perfectly as he did - just as he knew how poorly he dealt with his irritation. Both were present that morning as they walked into their classroom, mutually greeting Haruhi, Hikaru with some forced concern about how her night had been - at least he no longer needed a nudge to be reminded to make such an attempt - and Kaoru with what would have been surprisingly friendly laughter as she told them about some mishap with her father, had it only been a few short years ago.
As they took their seats, Kaoru couldn't help but frown to himself; there was something about his brother's movements that morning that he couldn't quite place, and that was odd to him; it spoke of a sort of hidden danger for whoever was in the way of... whatever was running through his head. He was positive that it was something, and part of him wondered if maybe it was a plan involving Haruhi. Perhaps something that might get her to question her feelings for him...? But if that were the case, Kaoru was sure that his brother would have at least let him in on the idea... wouldn't he? He thought on it and considered that maybe Hikaru had wanted it to be something entirely from his own mind, and that wouldn't have been especially surprising; if anything he considered it almost admirable. But only almost, because he knew all too well how his brother's mind worked.
And yet, no. As he sat at his desk, halfway paying attention to what their current teacher was saying at the front of the room, Kaoru watched his brother carefully, noting his actions. If this had anything to do with Haruhi, there would have been something different in how he reacted to her. Most didn't look closely enough to notice that, either, but Kaoru knew. There was always a telltale hint that could be used as a warning for whoever his brother had something in store for. A change in how he reacted to them, however minute. There would be a slight pause before everything that he said to whoever his victim was, a pause that Kaoru knew was the time necessary for Hikaru to bite back a revelation of his own anticipation. This hint was absent when Hikaru spoke with Haruhi.
He'd gone through the day keeping an even more watchful eye after coming to this realization, further baffled when he couldn't find his hint anywhere at all. It couldn't have been possible that Hikaru had figured out just how he always managed to have some idea of at least who would be subjected to his whims, could it? No, even if Hikaru had finally realized that, there certainly hadn't been enough time for him to learn to mask it.
Kaoru shook his head, turning his gaze away from his twin as their final teacher entered the room. Maybe he had misread the signs. Maybe it was only the irritation.
He mulled over this and finally reasoned that, yes, that must have been what it was. Happy with that conclusion, he set the thought aside and let himself relax, paying attention for this one class.
It was after that final class was over when things started to set into motion. Kaoru stood, taking a few steps over to Hikaru's desk as their classmates vacated the room, running his fingers through his brother's dye-darkened hair and closing his eyes as he did so. It was a simple action, one that was familiar and almost expected of the two of them, although any other pair of siblings would shy away from such an act. A display that could so easily be construed as intimate. In the back of his mind, Kaoru wondered if it was alright to continue this particular familiarity; there would likely be a time soon where a stop would be put to it, all as part of their growth. He wasn't sure if he particularly looked forward to that day.
He didn't notice the momentary pause before Hikaru leaned back against him. Or, if he did, he chalked it up again to the irritation. That was the entire reason he was doing this in the first place, after all; it had always been a pretty good way to calm his brother's frayed nerves.
"Cooling down yet?" he murmured, leaning forward to rest his chin on the other's head. "You've been like this all day."
Another delay. "I'm fine."
"Doesn't feel that way." His hands slipped down from the other's hair so that he could wrap his arms around his brother's shoulders. Another show of familiarity; they'd done it for years, these touches and holds. "Stop hiding it from me."
As soon as the words left his mouth, he realized what he'd said, and the last few minutes replayed through his mind. The two pauses were so glaringly obvious now, and he knew beyond any shadow of a doubt that his earlier theory of his brother devising something shouldn't have been dismissed so quickly. He knew, as sure as he was standing there, that there was, in fact, something that Hikaru had planned out, and he knew that he would be the one in for one hell of ride sometime before the day was over. He knew now that he was the object of Hikaru's scheme.
Oh shit.
"It's nothing. I'll get over it." The words went unheeded by the younger twin, causing Hikaru to shift enough to take a look up at him, frowning as he reached up to grab onto Kaoru's hands and give them a shake. "You alive in there?" He almost smirked - almost - when he felt his brother's slight jolt. But he didn't. That would be giving something away; of course, little did he know that he was given away already. "We should get going." He started to stand up, only to realize that Kaoru wasn't moving. Or, rather, to find that Kaoru wasn't pulling back to let him stand. Instead, his brother's arms tightened around his shoulders.
"You're irritated again."
"This really isn't the time for that, Kaoru. It'll pass." He shifted in his chair before Kaoru could retort to him giving in to his irritation, even if only slightly, turning around and dislodging his brother's chin from his head; he raised an eyebrow at him. "Stop worrying so much." One hand reached up to the back of his little brother's head, pulling him closer so that their foreheads were touching. "I just didn't sleep well." The skeptical look in Kaoru's eyes betrayed the fact that he didn't believe the excuse for even a second, but he didn't say a word, simply nodding, reaching up to place his hands on either side of Hikaru's head.
"Sorry."
He pulled back just enough to let Hikaru get up from his chair, heading together to the third music room of the south building in relative silence. To the students who passed by, it could almost seem as though they were trapped in avoidance once again and yet were refusing to part from each other's side for fear of the situation developing into a second bitter and silent fight. The impression was only solidified if anyone looked closely enough to see Hikaru almost twitching with aggravation or Kaoru casting glances at his older twin, seemingly nervous. But in truth, it was a companionable silence in spite of these otherwise awkward actions. They simply needed no words as they stayed side-by-side.
It was never a surprise to anyone when they opened the doors at the same time, stepping past the threshold in the same fluid motion. It wasn't even planned anymore - there was a time where they had to practice that timing, back in their early childhood, but those days were long past and it was simply second nature now. Kaoru wondered, every so often, when that would change as they slowly developed into separate and distinct people. Each time the question crossed through his mind, he found himself fighting down the slight panic the thought brought with it; he had to force himself to not consider that he didn't want that to change, just as he'd fought off the fear that had come along when Haruhi had been able to tell them apart that first time so long ago now.
However, like all things, he knew that his questionable, yet personally comforting, intimacy with his brother would eventually come to an end. Even if it was Hikaru who had demanded that they not break apart from each other, who had convinced him that the best way for each of them to grow was to do so side-by-side, and even if it was Hikaru who tended to initiate their contact, he knew that there would be a time soon enough where his twin would pull away from him. He hated to admit that he dreaded that day, in spite of the fact that it would signify his brother finally taking his life and happiness into his own hands. In that regard, Kaoru was still the same selfish child that he had always been.
If he was going to honestly help Hikaru in his quest to win Haruhi's heart, then that was simply how things would be.
A quick glance in Kyouya's direction told the twins that they were nearly late, but both shrugged it off immediately. Unlike their themed days, there were no special costumes for this day. Neither hesitated in walking past the other members, each reaching up as they neared Haruhi; Hikaru's hand rested on her head, while Kaoru's found her shoulder. A simple gesture of closeness, made up of one part that she was truly their friend, one part that they simply wanted a reaction out of Tamaki, and one part that Hikaru enjoyed the contact. Even if he had been rejected. If anything, the two of them had taken to picking up such actions even more frequently, almost to the extent that they had towards the beginning of their friendship with the girl. Ever since Tamaki had also clued in.
Immediately, violet eyes turned to them; before Tamaki could say anything to either of them, however, Kaoru had already removed his hand and begun walking towards the area where he and Hikaru usually entertained their customers. His dark-haired twin soon followed after leaning in to tell Haruhi something that Kaoru couldn't quite catch. Sinking into his seat, he closed his eyes, only to feel his brother's arm around his shoulders moments later. "Are you sure I'm the one who's irritated?" he teased, tugging his little brother closer to himself; Kaoru turned his nose up faintly at the insinuation before resting his head on Hikaru's shoulder. "You're worrying still."
"But it's not the time for that, right?" he said, echoing Hikaru's words from earlier, eyes opening to look up at him with a smile. "They'll be opening the door soon, so it'd be advisable to just focus on that for now. And we'll talk at home."
Hikaru raised an eyebrow at him before simply nodding, pulling Kaoru marginally closer to himself before turning his head to rest their foreheads against one another. "I'm going to have to hold you to that," he murmured just as the doors opened and some of the first of the day's patrons entered the third music room. Breaking apart mere moments before two of their regulars came to sit on the loveseat opposite them, Hikaru rose from his own seat, greeting the girls before excusing himself.
The two of them had always had a fairly standard routine for entertaining their guests; at each switch-off of customers, they would change which of them would sit and continue conversing with the young ladies while the other would go to pick up a tray with tea for them. The girls' moods seemed to really dictate just whether or not they were enthusiastic with which twin stayed behind - it wasn't to say that they particularly minded having one over the other, but their conversations always seemed geared towards which one stayed behind. On days where their guests were feeling considerably more mischievous, they greatly preferred having Hikaru sit with them to 'talk behind Kaoru's back' about what they were certain the older twin had in store for him. And on days when the young ladies were feeling a bit more docile, Kaoru was the twin of choice, for quiet conversations about how his brother would treat him. So much of what either said when left behind with the girls was pure fabrication, a true test of their improvisational skills.
Kaoru was the one who sat with the girls on the first group that they would be hosting that day while Hikaru went off to get their tea. He chuckled softly along with them as they exchanged some light banter before launching into a short narrative for them about the previous evening. Taking a moment to let his mind run away with just what he could say as the girls urged him on, he smiled kindly before shaking his head. "That might be best to ask Hikaru..." he responded, feigning shyness; resisting the urge to roll his eyes, he turned his face away as the girls began to squeal softly at his actions, forcing himself to blush. The timing could not have been more perfect; Hikaru returned to them just as he'd done so, setting the tray down onto the coffee table set between the extravagant loveseats, raising an eyebrow at his younger brother before moving with careful calculation to pour a cup of tea for each of their guests, as well as one for himself and his brother.
"It seems I missed something important..." he drawled, handing off one of the teacups with a smile before looking over to Kaoru. "I trust that you ladies didn't harass my dear Kaoru too badly while I was away, did you? He's so... delicate sometimes, you see." Kaoru trembled, turning his face a little farther away as his cheeks darkened fractionally, and Hikaru smirked; his twin's act was truly perfect. Certainly, it was more than enough for the girls to buy every last second of it. There never seemed to be even a single question as to why the 'gentle quaking' often seemed more like a shaking laughter with how smoothly he managed to play it off, not to mention how well Hikaru had come to cover for that. In this case, he languidly reached one elegant hand forward, long fingers brushing over his brother's cheek, eyes sparking with amusement as the other boy recoiled demurely. "I'd almost say you're lovely like this."
"Hikaru..." He was warning this time; they hadn't even truly begun their latest script, even if Kaoru had given enough of a nudge to their onlookers that they would be able to easily get into it. His brother shrugged and straightened up, retracting his hand as he did so and leisurely stepping around the loveseat that Kaoru was seated on, his every action nonchalant.
"Hikaru-kun!" he heard one of the girls cry out brightly; he turned to her with a raised eyebrow and an almost impish grin. "Kaoru-kun is being ever so bashful about it; I'm afraid that he won't tell us a single thing whenever we ask, regardless of the fact that he brought the topic to light in the first place. But you'll tell us, won't you?" Her airy giggle was almost too enthusiastic.
"I'm afraid that I am at a loss here, ladies. Just what is it that you were discussing?" He seemed a perfect picture of innocence, as much as it couldn't be further from the truth. Kaoru turned his face away just a hair further, successfully hiding a laugh under a new show of bashfulness.
"Why, we were discussing what each of us had done last night when Kaoru-kun just clammed up."
"Yes, well, he would clam up. But last night..." Hikaru's grin turned fond at that; trust Kaoru to craft such a flawless setup while he wasn't there. "Last night was rather... stimulating for us, you could say." He didn't even have to listen to know that all of the girls watching had immediately sucked in a startled breath and held it. It was predictable, but, then again, they had scripted it to get that exact reaction. His leading line was cunningly crafted to draw their thoughts to something dangerously forbidden. "You see, our parents are away again, and Kaoru always feels like he just has to try something whenever they-"
"Hikaru...!" The distressed exclamation - oh god, but it was so painfully false to him that Hikaru couldn't help but wonder how their designators bought it time and again - was followed quickly by muffled squeals as the girls forcibly clamped their mouths shut in an attempt to avoid disrupting the scene playing out before them. Kaoru turned at his waist, shifting his upper body away from his brother and glancing down at the floor. His movements were followed shortly by Hikaru leaning over the back of the loveseat, reaching one hand out to touch his cheek lightly with his fingertips.
"Kaoru..."
"Y-you don't have to say it that way..." The slight stammer hadn't been part of their script; small slips like that always seemed to work their way into their act, but it was never questioned. Hikaru knew by now exactly what caused the impromptu additions: Kaoru would do it to cover up a slip that would have ended up with him laughing. For him, a quick stutter was all that was required to amend the flub. For Hikaru...
Well, for Hikaru, he simply had to roll with it. He'd gotten good at making even his most cruelly amused laughs come off as gently mocking while hosting, and the effect would be accentuated by a quick improvisation in the form of tugging Kaoru towards himself.
He kept contact with his brother's cheek as he slowly walked around the loveseat, smoothly lowering himself onto it to sit right beside Kaoru, making sure that they were pressed against each other's sides. Kaoru reached one hand up to push Hikaru's away once he was seated, turning his face to the other side. He kept his hand raised, fingers curling and one knuckle pressed lightly near his lips, a soft blush lighting his features. It never ceased to amaze the older twin how the younger was able to make himself blush on command now. "Ah... forgive me, Kaoru. It's just that, you'd never dream of suggesting to cook for me when they're home." He reached up again, hand coming to rest at Kaoru's chin and gently turning his brother's face back to him. "Truthfully, I'd rather you suggest such things more often. It's exceptionally becoming for you."
There was no resistance as Kaoru faced his brother again, glancing shyly to the side momentarily before meeting his eyes. "Hikaru, th-that's..." That time, the stammer was predetermined. Hikaru leaned in a little closer, and Kaoru glanced downward, eyes appealingly closing halfway. Their designators each hissed in another anticipatory breath, not daring to let out so much as even the tiniest squeal this time as the brothers' lips nearly touched.
"I like seeing you act so..." That was where he ran into a snag: his impatience to begin his personal plan began to rear its head and the final word of Hikaru's line blanked from his mind. He was left to trail off suggestively, feeling a slight nudge from Kaoru - given surreptitiously - as he ran the line through his head again, covering for his flaw by turning his body a little more fully towards Kaoru, his free arm wrapping around his brother's waist and pulling him closer to himself; his only mistake in doing this was that he hadn't considered Kaoru's current position, and the younger twin ended up forced to lean on him in order to save himself from getting twisted around uncomfortably. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the girls grabbing onto each other's hands. Their thoughts may as well have been written in the air before them. Still, he continued, lowering his voice ever-so-slightly, the effect deepening his tone seductively, as well. "...So domesticated." Their lips brushed with the words, and Kaoru shivered.
It was then that realization began to set in for him, but he already knew that it was too late. Kaoru had let himself fall right into the trap that Hikaru had laid out for him - it suddenly dawned on him that his brother had even led their script to be written just perfectly to accommodate for what he would do - and if he even dared to attempt extracting himself now, there would be far too much negative attention and far too many repercussions following it. Still, he couldn't help but try. He breathed in to try to steady his thoughts, only to find that he was inhaling the same breath that Hikaru exhaled. He could taste his brother in that breath. To the avidly-watching girls, he sounded just as he always did in their acts when he finally spoke; to his brother, the gentle warning was evident. "Hikaru..."
But Hikaru chose to ignore the tone. "No need to be shy about it," he whispered, his head tilting a hair's breadth closer. Kaoru shivered again at his brother's lips moving a bit more firmly against his own "It's just another reason why you can never leave my side." And it was those words that caused the younger twin to notice that his arms were effectively trapped between their bodies after Hikaru had brought his arm around him. A part of his mind had to commend his older brother for the meticulous preparation he'd put into this, particularly in that he himself had been tricked along into it without even realizing. The fact that he'd worked so much into their script that could be used to further benefit his scheme was certainly admirable.
"I-I would never want to." The redhead cursed himself mentally; that had to be the first time he'd ever truly stammered for their act. He was nervous. Hikaru had managed to honestly make him nervous. That was new.
"Promises, promises..."
If they were to follow their script from there, Kaoru would turn his head to the side after those words. He would have had room to move back and mumble some 'shy' words about never breaking a promise to his beloved brother.
If they were following their script, there would have been a pause just long enough to allow for Kaoru's action.
But they weren't following their script any longer; they were following Hikaru's script. And in Hikaru's script, there was no pause; in his script, his hand moved immediately from its place below his brother's chin and slid to the back of his head, pulling him just that tiny bit closer for a kiss. It was simple and mostly chaste, nothing too terribly different from the quick pecks they'd given each other since childhood - a tendency that they hadn't ever broken away from, done as a simple means of comfort. This was firmer than that, of course, and it lingered. Somewhere in the back of their minds, both twins registered that the girls watching them had broken out into screams. That same part of their minds understood that the other girls in the room would quickly come to investigate what had happened, and that their fellow club members would be close behind.
Hikaru's script had only included that one, single, mostly harmless kiss. But that script was part of his plan, and his plan hadn't taken into account Hikaru's impatience and great lack of self-control. Which was how what he had intended to do morphed very quickly into what truly occurred.
One simple, mostly harmless kiss became two, two turned into three, and three tumbled into a series of quick, gentle kisses, slowly increasing in fervor as Kaoru began to respond, managing to pull his arms up from between their bodies and around his older brother's neck, where they rested comfortably. Hikaru's hand on the back of his head made him tilt it slightly, allowing the kisses to become a little more natural, and then it happened.
Hikaru's control snapped.
The entire room watched, transfixed, as Hikaru suddenly pushed forward, his lips still attached to his brother's as he pinned Kaoru down onto the loveseat, tilting his head to the side just a little more. The kiss grew deeper the instant he was on top of his twin. It was demanding, burning with a forbidding heat as Hikaru's tongue pressed against Kaoru's lips and Kaoru's fingers tangled into dark ash hair. He resisted at first, resolutely keeping his mouth closed, but the older of the two was persistent. He refused to be denied by Kaoru, and the redhead slowly parted his lips, keeping just enough control of himself not to let any sound out as he felt that warm, wet tongue slip past his lips and into his mouth, running lightly over the roof of his mouth, teasingly touching against his own...
He couldn't be sure if it had lasted barely an instant or if it'd gone on for at least a few minutes, but Kaoru did know that the kiss ended abruptly as Hikaru forcefully pushed himself up off of him, staring down into his eyes as he regained his breath and tried to reign in his instincts. There was an apology in those amber eyes, he could read it clearly, but he also saw that the sudden separation had been because the where, the when, the what had managed to dawn on Hikaru. Kaoru knew, in some distant part of himself, that he should have been worried by he momentary wave of disappointment that washed over him.
Slowly, very slowly, the twins turned their heads, fully conscious of the crowd that had pulled up around them, of the fact that all eyes in the third music room were currently on them. A couple of the girls, they saw from a quick scan, had apparently fainted. The other members of the Host Club were watching them with mixed expressions.
Kaoru turned his head back to face Hikaru, eying him questioningly, wondering just what could have possessed him to do that. But he wouldn't ask. Not there. Not until they were in the safety of their own home, behind the closed doors of their bedroom. Until then, he would play it off as part of their act. Or he would try to.
He almost opened his mouth to say something, in spite of not knowing what words he could possibly use. Hikaru beat him to it, though, reaching down and cupping the side of his face, brushing his thumb over Kaoru's lips. The younger twin blushed at that, a true blush. "Sometimes we need more than just promises, Kaoru," he said, sounding almost sincere. But Kaoru was probably the only one to catch that it was still an act - it only helped that understanding for him as the words were ones they had formulated together - as Hikaru's hand slid down from his face and arms, covering one of Kaoru's hands warmly before taking hold of it. Their fingers interlaced immediately, and he pulled his younger brother up to sit beside him.
"Hikaru...!"
He watched his brother shake his head, felt his finger on his lips again to silence him. "Later, once were home; we've done too much for now."
Whines of disappointment filled the room from the girls crowded around them, but not a single person moved. It was as though they were expecting Kaoru to question Hikaru's words, to press up to him and give his older brother another kiss, gentler than the one they'd just broken away from. When it became evident that no such thing would occur, the club's patrons began to slowly shuffle out of the room, most glancing back over their shoulders in hope of catching some display between the two, but there was no reward to that hope.
The doors closed behind the final girls to leave the room, and silence prevailed. It seemed, at first, that no one wanted to break it, to be the first to speak after the previous display, but Kaoru quickly realized that everyone was just waiting to ensure that none of the girls had remained by the door to listen in. Five minutes passed, then ten, and finally it was shattered.
"I'm sure that the two of you rea-" Kyouya began, but he was cut off by the still red-haired twin pushing his darker-haired counterpart roughly in the chest.
"What the hell were you thinking?!" Well, so much for waiting until they were in the safety of their own room. Kaoru leaned forward, grabbing onto the periwinkle fabric of the front of his brother's blazer and looking right into his eyes. The message in his own golden eyes was clear as day. Since when am I one of your toys? When had he become just like everyone else in his brother's mind?
"It wasn't supposed to go that far." In spite of the words, Hikaru didn't sound particularly remorseful. But, then, Kaoru knew that he wouldn't. At least part of that had been intentional, after all. But there was still that brief hint of an apology in his eyes. Not for the kiss, never for the kiss. For momentarily recategorizing Kaoru.
His grip loosened slightly, but he didn't let go of Hikaru's jacket. He was aware of the fact that Kyouya was talking to them, that he was saying something and being interrupted every so often by Tamaki's interjections, but he couldn't bring himself to pay enough attention. He found himself staring at his brother openly, trying to sort through his thoughts, to understand why this had happened and why he wasn't more annoyed by it, but he had a feeling that he knew the answer to that already. "But Hikaru is more important to me." Maybe he'd been the only one who hadn't seen the words for what they were. Did Hikaru also... He didn't want to think about that, didn't want to think that his brother had planned this just to... what, give him a reward for helping him out?
No. Hikaru wouldn't do that. Underhanded though the two of them may have been, there were limits to what they would and wouldn't do, particularly towards each other. Even if few people could believe that. If Hikaru had an inkling that Kaoru felt something stronger for him, he would never do something to lead him on, something that would inevitably irreversibly hurt him.
He'd enjoyed it, once the initial shock had worn off. Sure, he'd probably have liked it better if they hadn't been in front of a room full of people, but that didn't change the simple fact that he had enjoyed having Hikaru kiss him. There was something familiar about it, a warmth that simply was, that felt right and natural, even though the voice in the back of his head was screaming at him that it was wrong. That it shouldn't have happened.
That hadn't ever been a problem for them before. They'd always done things that shouldn't be done by the rest of the world's standards. By the standards of them. But their standards - the standards of us - had always been so much looser. For a moment, Kaoru was caught back in those old, familiar thoughts before reminding himself. There was no more world of us and world of them. They were trying to grow past that, and yet here he was, clinging to some of those same old thoughts, behaviors, and beliefs. He considered for a moment if it was that he was so desensitized that he didn't feel that something like kissing his twin brother was wrong. But there was more to it than that. Feeling how he did for Hikaru... he didn't find that wrong, either.
Kaoru couldn't lie and say he had never considered it before.
He didn't notice the concerned brown eyes watching him, didn't notice that Kyouya had stopped talking because Haruhi had said, "It's not really our problem. Let them be." He did, however, vaguely register Tamaki's voice saying something about their actions being unbecoming, that they had gone too far, and that they could very well have put them all in jeopardy. There was surprisingly little conviction behind the words, but it was true; Kaoru knew that it was true. If word were to ever get out about what he and Hikaru had just done, there surely would be a lot of attention placed on the club, not to mention the scandal for their family name. And even if it didn't, the girls who visited would expect a repeat performance of something that had been initiated as - as best as he could determine - a joke.
But Kaoru did realize, without any delay at all, when Hikaru pulled out of his grasp and rose quickly, hands angrily clenching into fists. "I don't really see how any of this is your concern. It's the sort of thing we were expected to pull in the first place, right?" He took a menacing step towards the blond 'king' by way of adding some additional sort of threat to his words. "If you want to go on about what we've done, then consider today as a huge step up in customer satisfaction. Or didn't you notice it?" Of course, they had noticed it; it would have been impossible not to, really, since they had been as much a part of that crowd as their patrons were.
Kaoru watched, helplessly stunned, as Mori placed a hand on Hikaru's shoulder to keep him from saying anything further, and then his attention was drawn to his side as he felt a tug at his arm. Blinking a couple of times, he turned to see Hunny standing there, motioning away from where they were now gathered; it took a second for the silent message to register, but Kaoru nodded, silently rising from the loveseat and walking over to a more secluded corner of the room. The sounds of the other members talking seemed a little more distant now, although he could just barely make out that it seemed that some terms were being set. Shouldn't I be there for that, too? he thought, but the idea wasn't entirely appealing right then.
"Kao-chan..." He shook himself slightly, looking down at the older and yet strikingly smaller blond with a raised eyebrow. Hunny had spoken lowly enough that they were the only ones who could hear. "Kao-chan, are you alright?" He nodded slightly in response, eyes still on the small group that they had just left, but it seemed that the petite upperclassman wasn't accepting that. "Then, why do you look so sad?"
That took him by surprise; he turned to stare at the blond for a few moments before nodding again. Suddenly, it felt like déjà vu. "I'll be fine, Hunny-senpai," he said quietly, and he figured that he truly would be. Hikaru hadn't meant any harm and probably didn't realize what he would be doing to him. His brother may have managed to take him off guard with some unexpected moments of maturity and wisdom, but when it came down to it, he was still the sort of person who acted before thinking too deeply.
"Hmm... maybe that's true, but..." Those big, brown eyes stared up at him thoughtfully for a few moments before Hunny looked down at the stuffed rabbit that he held in his hands, almost as though he were confirming something. Kaoru could just barely heard him whispering, "...Maybe I saw it wrong?" before looking back up at him. "You know, when you told Haru-chan that Hika-chan is more important to you...what did you mean, Kao-chan?" Kaoru looked away at the words; it wasn't the first time that Hunny had managed to see right through his thoughts and feelings, right into the truth that he was barely admitting to himself. It was uncanny how he could do that; it made him feel bared to the world.
"What did I mean, huh..." he muttered, seeing his friend hold up the pink plush doll to him, much as he'd done that night at his house when Kaoru had gone there to discuss the dilemma he'd been in. When Hikaru hadn't been speaking to him after he'd opened his mouth with revelations. Kaoru didn't hesitate, accepting the stuffed animal and holding it to himself with one arm, looking down at it for a few moments. He didn't want to say it; he felt that admitting his thoughts would make everything come undone. However, he also knew, beyond any doubt, that Hunny already knew what it was. The admission was quiet, barely audible, yet he felt as though he may as well have shouted it, it rang so clearly in his ears. "...lately, I've been wondering that myself, Hunny-senpai."
Hunny regarded him still, frowning to himself before taking a step closer, resting a hand on Kaoru's forearm. "What do you want?" he questioned quietly, echoing their conversation from that night. "Forgetting everyone else for a little while... what is it that you would like to have happen, Kao-chan?"
He smiled faintly at that. "This again..."
Hunny nodded, squeezing his arm lightly. "I know that you want Hika-chan to be happy, but you're hurting yourself again to try to make that possible, aren't you?" Golden eyes widened slightly at that, and Kaoru look back over to where his brother stood, discussing things still with Tamaki and Kyouya while Haruhi and Mori apparently moderated, as animated as he always was; their conversation, surprisingly, seemed to be lacking the tension that he expected, and he could faintly hear the words that his brother was saying, about how it had really just been a reward for their loyal customers. A pleasant lie, but one that would hold up. "Even though you know he can't be happy if you aren't. But, you were happy before, right? Hika-chan surprised you, but you were happy, Kao-chan."
The redhead shook his head, turning so that he couldn't see his twin anymore. It was starting to really unnerve him that the small blond read him so easily. Every time that Hunny proved to him that he knew exactly what he felt, what he wanted, it blew him away. He'd been so used to Hikaru being the only one to know him that well. But he smiled faintly, shifting his hold on Usa-chan so that he was holding the doll in both hands and staring down at it. "It can't happen."
"Kao-chan..."
"Please don't worry about it, Hunny-senpai." He smiled again, handing the stuffed bunny back to his older friend. He started to take a step away, but he hadn't even managed to get his foot back onto the ground when Hunny cut him off.
"You're not caring about yourself again." His voice was low, filled with a sad pain. "I thought I'd told you before, Kao-chan... you can't protect Hika-chan if you don't care about yourself. If you care for him, then... isn't it better if you stop running away from it? Isn't it better to be honest?"
The words froze him in place. Isn't it better to be honest...? Even with something like this? He nodded slowly, looking back towards his brother for a moment before ducking his head down, hiding his eyes behind his bangs. "Probably. You're probably right. But it's different this time."
He walked back towards their small gathering of friends before Hunny could respond, stepping into place at his twin's side. Hikaru cast him a questioning glance, but he just shook his head slightly; he wouldn't say anything now, not here. That was truly a conversation for when they were alone.
I want to see Hikaru's real smile again...
"We're leaving, right?" He didn't even wait for a reply, pushing Hikaru towards the door slightly and holding up a hand as his brother turned to him to protest. "We're going home." When Hikaru still didn't move, he stepped past his brother, grabbing onto his arm and pulling him. Again, that feeling of familiarity, of we've-done-this-before, passed over him, and he knew that it was all for the same reason; this was the exact way that they'd left Mori's home that night when their fight had ended. He couldn't let himself think on it. "'Milord,' Kyouya-senpai... ah, all of you. Sorry for the trouble."
Saying it like that, it was as though he were taking some responsibility, at least, in spite of having no idea what Hikaru had discussed with them or even if his brother had taken the full blame for the incident. Saying it this way, it put him in on the planning of the whole thing, and it was better that way, he felt. It wasn't anyone else's business if it the entire thing had been a surprise to him. It wasn't their business if it had been a stunt that Hikaru had planned on his own. That was something that would be dealt with between the two of them, for them to work out.
He didn't look behind himself as he dragged his brother to the doorway, just barely hearing his muttered, "Oh yeah... sorry," as they passed through, the door shutting behind him. Hikaru moved more naturally once out of the third music room, at least, and Kaoru no longer had to drag him; he let his hand drop from his twin's arm, only to find it immediately held by one of Hikaru's.
...not some fake smile filled with worries.
He almost stopped walking as the thought passed through his head. Why was he thinking of that again? They'd settled that problem and moved past it. Everything was fine between them, Hikaru wasn't forcing his happiness anymore. Was it just because so much was playing out in the same way that it had then? Or was it because, in wanting his brother's happiness, he was effectively saying that it was the thing that would make him happiest? Wasn't that what everyone said is the sign of true love? He shook his head to force the thoughts from his mind, just walking hand-in-hand with Hikaru as they had so many times in the past. No words were spoken, but the silence was oddly uncomfortable for them this time. Neither knew what to say, neither wanted to get any of it out in public. So they walked in silence, climbed into the backseat of the car that was waiting for them in silence, endured the entire ride in silence. It was stifling, suffocating. But it was preferable to the alternative.
. . .
The silence continued once they were home, making their way up to their bedroom and closing the door behind them. Kaoru pulled away finally, setting his bag down near his desk and unbuttoning his blazer before removing it and laying it over the back of his chair. He was just reaching up to loosen his tie when he felt Hikaru's arms around his waist, pulling him back against his brother's body. He didn't resist, tilting his head to the side and closing his eyes when Hikaru rested his chin on his left shoulder. Another form of intimate contact that any other siblings would completely shy away from, and yet had always just been something the two of them had naturally always done.
"Sorry." Kaoru said nothing in response, just leaning back against his twin a little more. He felt Hikaru's sigh - he could tell that he was frustrated - just before the dark-haired twin turned his face. "...didn't mean for it to go that far..." He kissed Kaoru's neck lightly, holding him a little tighter; Kaoru's spine stiffened momentarily, and Hikaru could feel it. The action caused him to frown; Kaoru had never been uncomfortable with him doing that before. "It was only supposed to be once, Kaoru. You know I didn't mean for it to go that far, right?" He sounded almost desperate for some form of positive response; Hikaru had never done well with being left hanging for too long.
But Kaoru remained silent, not sure how to respond to that. How could he respond to it? Hikaru's hold on him tightened again, a silent plea for a response, for him to say something, anything, but he still said nothing, closing his eyes and reaching one hand up to rest on one of his brother's wrists. "Why?" he whispered finally, dropping his head marginally. "Even just once, why did you do it?" He thought, at first that he would get no response as he felt his twin exhale frustratedly before twitching. Hikaru shuffled his feet just a bit, turning his head to rest a cheek on his twin's shoulder. But Kaoru was ready to wait for whatever the response would be, not to mention that he was content to do so for as long as it might take. Moments like this proved how childish Hikaru could still be, that was for certain. He'd answer in his own time, and not a moment sooner.
Seconds passed by and quickly turned to minutes before the quiet was broken. "It was payback." He sounded almost embarrassed by the words, something that struck the younger twin as out of place but acceptable for the time being. He tilted his head towards Hikaru's slightly, urging him to continue. "...You just seemed to be getting too much enjoyment out of all of it. Out of seeing me screw up and get pissed off, only to stop me and remind me of that damn... game you came up with." Not that Hikaru didn't appreciate his brother's thoughtfulness in actually crafting it. He just hated what it entailed.
"You would have enjoyed it, too, if you were sitting in my position," his redheaded mirror retorted. "Besides, it was for your own good, and it's been a while since we even did that. You learned to not just explode and throw your feelings in everyone's faces. You're growing up." Even if he did have to admit that, sometimes, he did really like Hikaru's brash way of yelling out when he was frustrated. The raw emotions that he would state so hastily and oftentimes so improperly were refreshing in their own way. Not that Hikaru had completely outgrown his outbursts or anything of the sort. Thinking about it, Kaoru wondered if maybe he'd just given up on seeing that through, and another part furthered the consideration of wondering if maybe he'd done so for the selfish reason of keeping that part of his brother around a while longer.
"Doesn't mean you have the right to enjoy my suffering," Hikaru muttered, although he knew that Kaoru was right. If the situation had been reversed, he'd be getting plenty of entertainment from it. He shifted, nose rubbing against his brother's neck. "Anyway, I just figured I'd get you back for it."
"By embarrassing me in front of everyone."
"I didn't think you'd get embarrassed by one damn kiss."
"You were just hoping I would." Kaoru sighed, not bothering to point out that even if one kiss wouldn't have embarrassed him - he couldn't say for sure if it would or wouldn't have, honestly - the string of kisses that led to Hikaru's tongue ending up in his mouth was a different matter entirely. Still, he sounded more annoyed than he really was, and he moved his hand to squeeze one of his brother's reassuringly before teasing him. "But no, I know. What really happened is that you forgot that you don't know how to keep yourself from doing something incredibly... stupid."
"Hey!"
"No self-control..." he murmured, shifting backwards again and letting himself rest even further against Hikaru, reaching his free hand up to touch the dark spikes that his brother's hair had been artfully arranged into.
"Look, I said I'm sorry." Hikaru was getting exasperated, his little brother could tell, although he tried to cover it by placing another kiss on his neck. "Forgive me yet?"
Kaoru seemed to consider what his response would be - although they both knew that Hikaru had been forgiven long before they'd even left school, let alone stepped into their family's mansion - before nudging Hikaru's head up with his shoulder. The older twin raised his head as the younger turned his own to give him a light peck on the lips. The same gesture they'd always shared. A sign of comfort, of acceptance, of forgiveness. "Always."
But then it happened again. Normally, they would have pulled apart after that, changing out of their uniforms and probably moving onto some game that one or the other (usually Hikaru) had found, or Kaoru might have picked up a book to read until Hikaru inevitably got bored and began to pester him to alleviate said boredom. But this time, they lingered, lips almost touching, breathing softly, taking each other in, the events of that afternoon replaying through their heads.
This time, it was Kaoru who bridged that infinitesimal gap, kissing his brother lightly, one hand still on Hikaru's at his waist while the one touching his hair took gentle hold there. Hikaru responded immediately, returning Kaoru's kiss with one of his own, which led directly into another. Each successive kiss was longer and more desperate than the one preceding it as the darker-haired twin loosened his hold just enough to allow his brother to move to face him. Kaoru obliged, not once breaking contact; he was only halfway through the turn when the kisses became open-mouthed and Hikaru's tongue experimentally touched his lower lip before withdrawing.
And then he was pressed flush against Hikaru, arms around the other's shoulders and fingers tangled in his dark ash hair again, nipping and licking at his brother's lips and shivering whenever their timing caused their tongues to meet. One hand slid up his back, the other moving further down, effectively trapping him to his older twin's body, although the measure was not even remotely necessary. Kaoru moaned softly, involuntarily, directly into Hikaru's mouth and the sound seemed to die there, only to be followed quickly by another. His twin was encouraged by this, kiss deepening as his tongue entered Kaoru's mouth, immediately pressing to his younger brother's. Kaoru attempted to turn the tables there, tried to force both of their tongues towards Hikaru's mouth instead, but Hikaru almost seemed ready for that, trapping Kaoru's tongue under his own. Instead, both stayed in Kaoru's mouth, partaking in a sort of dance almost. It was sloppy and it was heated... but it was, most importantly, them. And both twins loved every second of it.
As one would try to pull back, the other would pull him forward, forcing the kiss to remain longer, to intensify; it happened again and again, until both felt as though their lungs were on fire and were forced to separate, but only just enough that they could breathe in little panting gasps of air. Their faces were kept close to one another, lips brushing with each exhalation. It was blissful, their own little piece of heaven. Kaoru's hands remained tangled in Hikaru's hair, tugging lightly every few breaths. The older twin smiled, giving his brother a quick peck.
"What was that you said about embarrassing you?"
Hikaru's right hand reached up to the base of Kaoru's neck as he spoke those words, and then he shifted it to trail his fingers up to play with the nape of his brother's red hair. Kaoru groaned, though whether it was from that contact or from what had been said, neither of them could really say. "Shut it." He closed his eyes, shifting so he could rest their foreheads against each other, the tips of their noses touching. They remained silent like that for a few minutes, simply enjoying the feel of being so close together, sharing in the knowledge of what they'd done and not worrying about where it might lead, before he spoke again. "It might've been nice not to have my first kiss in front of a room full of people, though."
He watched one dark eyebrow raise as his brother stepped forward, causing him to take a step back. Calculated, it was all so very calculated, and he knew exactly what Hikaru's aim was. "We've kissed before," he heard his twin whisper, but Kaoru simply shook his head.
"Those didn't count."
Laughter met his ears, sweet, deep, and beautiful. Kaoru had always loved that sound. There was something just so deliciously enticing about it, something so Hikaru, and he was certain that there was no way that his own sounded quite as pleasing. Hikaru's voice had always been just a small fraction deeper than his own. A tiny little difference that anyone would have to listen very closely for - they so rarely did - and that Kaoru took great satisfaction in. Hikaru's laugh was his guilty pleasure. But it died out quickly enough when Kaoru didn't join in and the two were left staring at each other, the situation that they had created - for Kaoru could never let his brother take the blame for it all onto himself, even if the plan had been his - finally catching up to them. They seemed to realize at that moment just what they had done and what it might mean. They looked away from each other. How could either look into that identical face and say a word of explanation?
Or maybe it was because there was no explanation to be said. For them, maybe this was just the natural course of things. They had always been closer than was normal for siblings. Holding hands, arms around each other, pecks on the cheek or lips... these were things that were simply common actions for them from long before they'd joined the host club.
"Anyway, weren't you the one who kissed Haruhi in an amusement park?" Only to then go to Mori's place to find his twin to repeat the gesture.
"That's different. It was only on the cheek."
"Got an explanation for everything, don't you?"
The facetious inquiry caused him to draw back, tapping a finger to his lips while seemingly weighing the possible responses he could give. "Only for the obvious."
Hikaru raised an eyebrow again, taking another step forward. Kaoru stepped back, and the process was repeated. It wasn't until the backs of his calves hit against the bedframe that he realized that Hikaru had managed to turn them at some point without him even noticing. Distantly, he wondered if this had also been part of his brother's scheming, but it was driven from his head when Hikaru continued to advance, pushing him back onto the mattress and quickly lowering himself onto him before Kaoru could move. "So, then, my dear little brother," he whispered into Kaoru's ear, his voice slipping into the deeper and dangerously seductive tone that he was so used to using now in their acts. "What would be your explanation for this?"
One red eyebrow raised as a playfully confident smirk lit the younger twin's features. He kept his voice even, speaking in a simple matter-of-fact manner as he retorted, "Obviously that you're a horny bastard who doesn't know how to keep it in his pants."
"I didn't hear you complaining." Any reply that Kaoru may have considered making was forestalled as he felt Hikaru's lips on his again, stealing away his breath and tearing another faint moan from his lips. His brother's hands found their way to his wrists, holding them down onto the bed as he pressed himself down just a bit harder, lightly biting at the redhead's lower lip, demanding entry into his mouth. There was no delay this time, and the older twin immediately slipped his tongue into the other's mouth. It was a slow, lazy, largely inexperienced kiss, but neither could find any complaint with any of those facts as their tongues met one another, pressing together and swirling around each other before Kaoru seemed to recapture his confidence in spite of the position that he found himself in. He reciprocated the attention his brother gave to him, letting out a moaning sigh as he pressed into Hikaru's mouth, tongue running over the roof of his brother's mouth just as he felt Hikaru's slide along the inside of his cheek. He thought he heard a deep chuckle that cut off into a groan, and knew that he felt the hands on his wrists tighten. A small part of him, at the back of his mind, wondered if he might have distinctive bruises there the next day. A much larger part of him didn't care either way.
He flinched slightly when he felt Hikaru's tongue move again, pressing against his soft palate; the action caused him to squirm under Hikaru's body, pressing up slightly and instinctively trying to free his arms, but that warm, soft mass of muscle just continued to delve farther in, almost to his throat, drawing a soft whine from him. His squirming became more insistent, and he heard a soft grunt from his brother before feeling him draw up leisurely; breathing hard, their lips still nearly touching, two pairs of golden eyes opened and stared into each other. Hikaru freed one of Kaoru's wrists to bring his hand to his twin's cheek, drawing a design there almost listlessly, as though this were the most natural and casual thing he could have ever done.
"...Hikaru."
"Shh." That one long finger trailed from his cheek to his lips, pressing against them. Kaoru couldn't help giving the skin of his fingertip a kiss, closing his eyes and humming pleasantly. He knew Hikaru's lips twitched into a smug grin as he breathed out invitingly, "More?" Kaoru nodded, kissing at Hikaru's finger again before his eyes lit up mischievously, parting his lips and sucking the elegantly slim extremity into his mouth. He heard the darker-haired Hitachiin hiss in a breath as he lightly scraped his teeth over his finger before swirling his tongue about the digit, grinning around it. "I've always loved the way your devious little mind works." He began to pull his finger back, smirking as Kaoru sucked a little harder to draw it back into his mouth. His grin grew more impish at this, leaning in again.
He watched Kaoru carefully, amused to note that his brother's normally treacherous amber eyes were filled with confusion when he didn't pull his finger away to replace it with his lips, instead continuing forward, lips brushing against his left ear. "You've wanted this, haven't you?" he whispered almost knowingly; in truth, he wasn't entirely sure of his own words, but it sounded good enough and he knew better than anyone - which was to say that he was the only one who knew - that the best way to get any amount of information out of his little brother was to trap him with leading questions. Eventually, he would hit on the right ones enough times that Kaoru would inadvertently give the truth away. Right then, he was fairly certain that it would take far less than normal, considering the state that the redhead was clearly in. His little brother would certainly try to pay him back in spades later for anything that he did, but that was a risk that he was willing to take, he decided as he felt those sinful lips press tighter around his finger, felt that wicked tongue twist around the extremity.
"How long, Kaoru? How long have you wanted me to do this to you?" There was a soft sound that Hikaru couldn't quite make out as Kaoru shook his head slightly, pressing up against his body. "No? You didn't want this?" There was a moment hesitance; the redhead paused in his sucking before slowly trying to tug him a little farther in, as if to say that it was exactly what he wanted. Hikaru smirked against his skin before lightly blowing onto his ear, feeling his twin shiver pleasurably beneath him. "You little minx; you did want this. You've always wanted it, haven't you?" That particular inquiry elicited a low moan from his twin, and Hikaru felt himself smirking again, although he couldn't be exactly certain of why. Was it simply the power he felt at the knowledge? Was it the sense of domination? Wait... since when did I ever want to dominate Kaoru?
The question left his head reeling for a moment as he pulled back, looking into eyes that so often mirrored his own, only to be shocked by what he saw there; the look in those golden eyes was so foreign and unfamiliar, filled with confusion, with hunger, with longing. He briefly wondered if his looked the same right then, but pushed the thought aside. Slowly, he pulled his hand back, the feel of his brother's tongue torturous as the redhead attempted not to let his finger go. Hikaru prevailed, staring down at the boy beneath him worriedly, watching his chest heave as he drew the corner of his lip into his mouth with a needy whimper. "Kaoru..."
But golden eyes simply looked away from Hikaru nervously as Kaoru began to struggle, his hazy mind catching up to the situation. He attempted to free the arm that his older brother still held firmly down onto the bed. "Just stop."
"Kao-"
"It's not a game, Hikaru!" he cried out suddenly, cutting his dark-haired counterpart off. "I'm not one of your toys. You can't... you can't just kiss me to get a rise out of me, all because you think it's a fantastic way to pay me back for getting amused. Stop playing with me!"
Silence. The memory of the scandalized look on Kaoru's face back in the third music room from earlier that afternoon suddenly came to the forefront of his mind as Hikaru stared down at his little brother in bewilderment, not sure just what to make of the words before slowly removing his hand from the other's wrist, peeling himself up off of him carefully to just sit and watch him. Kaoru drew his wrist to his chest, massaging it with his previously-freed hand. There would be marks there in the morning, Hikaru could tell just from looking, and he winced. He hadn't meant to hurt his brother... he never meant to hurt him. And here there would be such obvious bruises on pale skin, in the shape of his fingers. Marks that perfectly fit his hand.
Neither moved for what felt like an eternity before Hikaru finally pushed himself forward, hands finding their way to Kaoru's shoulders to force him onto his back, pressing their foreheads together and closing his eyes. "I never saw you as a toy." Whispered words that he intended with the fullest comfort. "If it was just a game to me, then none of this would have happened here. Or do you think that I felt nothing?"
Kaoru shuddered before slowly bringing his arms up to wrap around Hikaru's shoulders, sighing when the older twin's arms moved under him and wrapped around his body. It took a few moments, but he nodded in understanding. "'...But Hikaru is more important to me,' I told her that day..." he whispered, laughing faintly to himself. His brother said nothing in response to this, not quite sure just where he was going with his words. "Even she must have been able to see it then. Kind of sad that I couldn't."
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm probably an idiot. Maybe even close to as much as you or 'Milord' are," Kaoru murmured, closing his eyes again and sighing, pulling Hikaru down against himself. "I told her I loved her, even though the only person I was even thinking about was you. I spent that day with her - all of those days with her - and the only person on my mind was you. Even confessing to her was for your sake. Maybe it's that-"
Whatever he had been about to say was halted by warm lips pressed against his again; there was no demanding desire this time, just simple and comfortable understanding. A gentle, soft, lingering kiss, the very sort that Hikaru had intended to give him earlier that day as their sole kiss, and the very sort that had led them to where they were. He pulled back slowly, drawing Kaoru's lower lip with him as he did and enjoying the soft, longing sigh that came in response to his action.
"Was it love, or were you in love," he whispered unquestioningly against his brother's lips, noting how the other shifted his head ever-so-slightly, nose rubbing against his cheek. "How long have you felt this way, Kaoru?" The only response was a slight shake of the head, and he understood: his younger twin had no idea. It simply was. And he sighed as well, pulling the other boy closer to himself, tilting his head up to press a kiss to the other's forehead before reaching up to brush his fingers through soft, copper-toned hair. "How about this: we'll see how far it goes." Kaoru shivered at the words, leaning into him again. "You've always been the first person I think of. And it's like I said before... isn't it a wonderful gift, that we have each other?" Sure, the situation now was a little different and those weren't exactly the words he'd used on the morning that he'd convinced Kaoru not to pull away from him, but it sounded good and he was sure it'd work out alright. Improvisation had always been his forte, anyway. "It might be exactly what we're both looking for."
"But what about-"
A finger pressed to Kaoru's lips before he could finish the question as Hikaru's eyes slid closed; he shook his head almost imperceptibly, a faint smile on his lips. He knew that his brother had been about to ask him about Haruhi, and it wasn't that he didn't understand why he would be asking, just that he wasn't sure if it honestly mattered to him right then. He thought on it as they remained there silently, trying to determine just what to say about that particular situation. "I also suffered an... was it an 'honorable defeat'?" He heard the soft snort of Kaoru's laughter, which brought an easy, familiar grin to his face. They shared a few moments together in humor just like that before sobering up. "I'll probably always be grateful to her, for being the first person to truly show us that there are people who notice that we are separate."
"That isn't all you feel for her," Kaoru said slowly, eyes on his brother's face; the dark-haired teen shook his head slightly.
"I could say the same for you, you know. But, that's besides the point." He opened his eyes, rolling off of Kaoru and staring up at the ceiling for a moment before grabbing the other boy's arm and tugging, indicating that he'd like his twin to roll over onto him. Kaoru obliged without hesitation, smiling down at him. "Probably, it's the same as you. I've wondered a couple of times... who is it that I can't see myself living without. And always, you're the one my mind keeps coming back to."
As Hikaru reached up to touch the soft copper spikes of his brother's hair, Kaoru took the time to study his face intently. There wasn't any lie in what he was saying, he knew that much; he would have felt it right away if it hadn't been the complete truth. In a way, though, it was almost... "How boring."
Fingers grabbed onto some of the redhead's spikes, tugging lightly. "Shut up, you." The tone was an affectionate growl, and Hikaru leaned up, kissing the tip of his brother's nose. He enjoyed these affectionate gestures that they'd always had, the small intimacies that they'd shared for years that needed no words to explain to each other. To hell with anyone else if they didn't understand it, he'd always felt. And if they were developing into something more... all the better. His gaze locked with Kaoru's as his head rested on the bed again, noting the concern in his twin's golden eyes.
"Hikaru, you're su-"
Frowning, Hikaru decided to cut him off immediately.
"Shh. Stay with me. Be with me. And just let me worry about the rest for once."
. . .
He'd listened. Against his better judgment, Kaoru had listened to Hikaru, entertaining his request to allow him to worry about everything this time. He honestly did try his hardest not to let himself grow too concerned over anything, simply losing himself in sensations. That was how evenings alone in their bedroom led to Kaoru being pressed down onto their bed while Hikaru sealed their mouths together. It was how he found himself concentrating on his homework one moment only to feel Hikaru's teeth scraping his neck the next. It was how he ended up finding Hikaru's hands unbuttoning his shirt whenever he turned his back to him, forcefully turning him around and peeling the cloth from his body, letting it fall to the floor before his hands began exploring his skin. Sometimes, Hikaru's hands wandered too far, dipping just inside of his pants. Every time that happened, he pulled back after just a few moments.
That wasn't to say that everything was initiated by the older of the two. Kaoru would give as good as he received, backing his brother into walls - or down onto the floor, and once or twice onto one of their desks - for a kiss. He came to realize quickly how advantageous physical contact could be as a weapon of sorts; Hikaru would lose his train of thought if Kaoru pressed up against his back just so, or if he would wrap a leg around his brother's while they were watching television together. He learned to simply give in to his curiosity because of this, grinning madly as Hikaru tried to suppress a shiver as dexterous fingers trailed up his spine, drinking in every groan as palms flattened over his abdomen to smooth their way up to his chest before retreating. Occasionally, Kaoru would wonder just what it was that made him enjoy those moments as greatly as he did, only to conclude that it must have had something to do with the sense of control that he felt every time that his lithe body pressed against his twin's, arms wrapping around shoulders and face pressing contentedly against his neck.
The intimacy wasn't confined to their home, behind closed doors. There were new touches at the Host Club speaking of an almost dangerous relationship between them, soft kisses when 'no one was looking' - perfectly planned, of course, to ensure that their fans would, in fact, see every last one - and Hikaru's hands wandering almost too low. It never went unnoticed, and every last second of it brought new satisfaction to the growing crowds of girls that would come to watch the two embrace their forbidden romance. An act, the girls would tell themselves. It was the ideal way to get away with everything they did out in the open.
Three weeks passed, and the touches became more familiar, the kisses more frequent and experienced, the hands more knowledgeable. Their nights became almost unbearable, filled with fantasies of one another while they lay in each other's arms. Their bodies would press against one another, moving together sensually as they lost themselves to their separate, and yet complementary, desires. They would wake in the morning, breathless and sweating, sticky with the evidence of the previous night's dreams and momentarily lost in the illusion that whatever their minds had shown to them still continued. Hikaru's lips would find the his younger brother's throat, arms would tighten around each other's bodies, and he'd slowly kiss his way up to Kaoru's lips, tongue trailing over skin left salty from perspiration, teeth lightly scraping him in gentle nips. Those morning kisses, heated by the fierce passion of a vivid mirage, were bittersweet as awareness slowly took hold of them and they grudgingly parted to prepare for another day filled with teasing, caressing, and delicious indulgence. The long, slow, tender kisses were reserved until they were safely locked back into their room in the evening, forging new material to plague their nights.
Everything led up to that one, lazy Sunday morning. The sun shone brightly through their windows, falling onto their bodies curled up around each other. Hikaru woke first, watching his twin sleep, feeling his body rubbing against him; he had to admit to himself that Kaoru looked nothing short of irresistible, both legs wrapped around one of his as he rubbed himself against him in agonizingly slow movements. A soft moan was pulled from Kaoru's throat, and Hikaru couldn't help but smirk at it, an idea forming in his head as he slid one hand down his brother's body to rest on his ass. His touch was met with a gasp and a muffled, "Mm, Hikaru..." as his brother's face buried into his shoulder. His hand squeezed lightly and he heard a muted squeak as Kaoru stirred.
"Good morning, sunshine."
Amber eyes blinked up at him in confusion for a few moments before Kaoru began to unravel himself from his body, frowning up at him before reaching up, eyes narrowing into a glare as he smacked his fist into Hikaru's chest. "What're you waking me up for..." he grumbled before leaning forward and pressing his face into his brother's shoulder again.
He grinned slowly, fingers reaching up to brush through the limp copper hair at the back of Kaoru's head. He remained silent for the time being, turning just enough so that he could bring his other arm around his twin's waist, his playful grin turning into a fond smile as the redhead snuggled into him, mumbling something that he couldn't quite catch before sighing contentedly and settling down. It was peaceful, even with Kaoru's hips shifting suggestively against his thigh every so often. The images running though Hikaru's head became clearer with that and the mischief returned to his eyes as he leaned in to whisper into the sleeping teenager's ear. "Kaoru, take a shower with me."
There was a questioning hum as Kaoru nuzzled against his neck, clearly half-asleep as he murmured, "That's nice... whatever you want, Hikaru..." and pressed closer. It took all of his willpower not to laugh at this, instead shaking the sleeping form of his twin gently.
"I'm serious. Let's go, get up."
Golden eyes finally opened again, blinking owlishly up at him before one eyebrow raised as Kaoru tilted his head to the side for a moment, apparently contemplating if he'd heard correctly in his haze before nodding very slowly, sliding backwards and away from his older brother. Hikaru had to force himself not to close his eyes with a moan as his brother's hips wriggled against his leg for a moment before he released him. It took a few minutes for the two of them to finally extract themselves from the warmth of their sheets, stretching as they stood; Hikaru noticed a faint blush on Kaoru's cheeks, but he said nothing. That was becoming an altogether too common - but appreciated, nevertheless - sight in the mornings now, and he knew that it had everything to do with the dreams that his brother had been roused from. Sometimes, he thought to question him on just what Kaoru had envisioned them doing, but he would stop just short of doing so. The discussion would only end with arousal, and that was a barrier that they hadn't quite passed yet. Not that he hadn't considered the possibility - not that he wasn't considering it right then, for that matter - but it was a discussion that could wait, anyway. He wondered, though... were Kaoru's fantasies the same as his? Or was he, perhaps, turned on by something that Hikaru hadn't considered?
Shaking his head slightly to clear his thoughts, he wrapped his arms around the waist of his still-waking brother, pulling him close against himself and dropping a feather-light kiss to his neck. "Come on, this'll help," he whispered, shifting slowly towards their en suite bathroom, refusing to remove his arms from around the other's waist; he heard Kaoru's appreciative hum, feeling it against his lips as he closed his eyes momentarily.
"Still tired..." the younger twin muttered as they neared the doorway, allowing himself to be shuffled into the room and leaning against the countertop when Hikaru let him go to turn the water on. "I was enjoying that dream..." He frowned when he heard his brother's laughter, fixing a withering glare on him as he turned around. The glare died quickly, however, as warm hands found their way to his hips, slipping quickly into the waistband of his pajama pants and sliding them down. Kaoru was certain that his brother was trying to torture him with this action, fingers trailing over his thighs, agonizingly slow. He wanted to kick himself for the gasp that managed to make it past his lips, the sound encouraging Hikaru to stroke his skin as he allowed the loose, light cloth to drop carelessly to the floor and he dipped his head down to kiss Kaoru's shoulder.
"I could feel that you were enjoying it." There was humor in his voice when one hand slid behind Kaoru's body and rested on the smooth skin of his butt, rubbing lightly. Dark hair tickled at his cheek as Hikaru raised his head just enough to press his lips to his ear. "So I'm that good in your thoughts, hm?"
Immediately, Kaoru pushed halfheartedly at his twin's chest. "Idiot." But the word was simply met with another laugh, lighthearted and uplifting, as Hikaru pulled back, shedding his own pants before taking his hands and leading him into their shower. Kaoru's golden eyes slid closed at the feeling of warm water hitting him from multiple directions. Mornings like this, when he was still caught half-asleep, he could truly appreciate the luxury of the apparatus as water cascaded down onto him from the oversized showerhead of thirty-centimeter diameter above them, while six far smaller ones were attached and angled along the walls on either side of them. The effect was akin to a hydro massage, soothing and rousing all at once; the effect caused him to hum again, chest rumbling and the sound almost coming out as a purr when Hikaru's hand found its way to his hair again, running through it for a few moments before pulling back, only to bring one of his arms around Kaoru's waist once again to pull him back and out of the water's streams. His other hand came up to lightly grab Kaoru's chin, turning his head to the side and meeting him halfway with a soft, warm, prolonged kiss, drawing back from him leisurely to see the redhead blinking at him again.
"Awake now?"
"Mm... getting there." He started to turn to his dark-haired twin, intent on getting another kiss out of him, frowning when Hikaru pulled away from him. "Cheater." Another laugh was his only response as his brother brushed past him, a hint of something glinting in his eyes as he unhurriedly picked up the bottle of bodywash, his long and slender fingers just barely holding it as he reached for a white shower puff with his other hand. Kaoru frowned at this. "Hikaru, shouldn't your hair come first?" His brother appeared to not have heard him, however, and proceeded to pour some of the liquid soap onto the puff before replacing the bottle on its shelf, squeezing the object in his hand until soft, foamy lather formed on it. The whole time, he kept his face hidden, and Kaoru could only watch on curiously.
Slowly, tauntingly, he moved his arm so that his hand was just over his shoulder and squeezed the shower puff, sending suds cascading down his back and immediately drawing Kaoru's attention, his gaze following the foam as it traveled down perfect, unblemished skin. The sight caused him to blush, his mouth suddenly feeling dry and his throat constricted as he swallowed hard and attempted in vain to tell himself that the sight wasn't as erotic as his mind was telling him that it was. After all, how many times had he and Hikaru washed together? Certainly, he'd seen his brother wash himself plenty of times in the past. He'd just... never moved so slowly - so deliberately - before. No... I'm just imagining it. Maybe I'm still drea-
His thoughts were rudely interrupted when he suddenly felt himself being embraced from behind again. When did he... Blinking, he turned his head enough to see his brother, shivering as he felt the shower puff being pressed onto his chest, squeezed between his body and Hikaru's hand to force the lather onto his body before moving the soft object downward. Amber eyes slowly slid closed, only to snap back open a brief moment later as Hikaru's other hand pressed flat against his skin, sliding down unhurriedly, rubbing over his skin sensuously and spreading the soapy substance across him. Kaoru's breath caught in his throat as nimble fingers briefly brushed over one of his nipples and he groaned, letting his head loll back onto Hikaru's shoulder.
"Hikaru, what the hell do you think you're doing?"
"I'm just cleaning you off, Kaoru. You're so... dirty." The nonchalant words were purred into his ear as Hikaru's hand - that treacherous, teasing hand - smoothed over his abdomen and came to a rest just below his naval, flat against his skin and dangerously close to his pelvis; it was painfully obvious just how much of a lie was being spoken. He whined softly, squirming under the touch, wanting more and yet fearing that he would receive just that. Hikaru's breath played hotly against his ear in controlled puffs as his brother leaned his face closer, just enough to lick behind it, sending involuntary shivers down Kaoru's spine. There was a soft laugh at his reaction as that hand pulled him back to rest snugly against the other's body, his ass resting firmly against Hikaru's crotch - Kaoru could feel Hikaru's erection slide between the cleft of his ass as he was pulled tightly to him and just barely managed to bite back a low moan - as his twin spoke once more. "...But, then again, so am I."
He would never admit it, but it took a few moments for the words to register in his lust-fogged mind. Hikaru wouldn't need him to acknowledge that shortcoming, though. Oh, no. Hikaru never needed Kaoru to admit to anything at all, and admission was never a wise choice where either of them was involved to begin with. And so knowing without needing words to tell him so, the older twin smirked against the perfect skin at the back of his brother's neck, and Kaoru felt the action from its initial twitch. But, then, he would have known his brother's expression regardless of seeing or feeling him. It made something click in his mind: the tone in his brother's voice, the words he was saying, the knowing laugh, the superior smirk. There was only one thing to describe him right then. "Asshole."
"I do try."
Whatever retort Kaoru had been considering making died in his throat as Hikaru's left hand, the one that had been holding the puff mere seconds earlier, was suddenly resting on his thigh, fingers lightly stroking his skin and forcing him to moan again. He cursed himself; Hikaru would certainly be feeling even more superior after hearing that, he knew, but the thought was wiped from his mind again as his twin's right hand slid back up his body, firmly pulling him back and pressing him painfully close to a firm chest. Kaoru felt his cheeks heating up as he belatedly realized that his brother was rolling his hips into him very slightly, his cock rubbing the cheeks of his ass and causing the redhead to whimper. "Hi-Hikaru, don't..." His brother's head shifted, lips coming to rest at his ear as he hummed quizzically and continued to slide his hand upward on the younger twin's chest, fingers catching at Kaoru's left nipple, pinching lightly before soothingly rubbing at it with his thumb. "Don't..." The word was met with a gentle shushing into his ear before the dark-haired twin's tongue slid along the skin there, his head moving just slightly closer so that he could graze his teeth over the soft, fleshy lobe. Kaoru shivered, pressing back, face burning as the action pressed his brother's erection more firmly against him, and those sinful lips smiled as his left hand slid to his inner thigh, running up slowly, sensually, until it rested at the juncture of his leg and his pelvis and tore a soft whine from the younger twin's throat.
"For someone who keeps saying 'don't, don't,' you sure aren't resisting, my dear Kaoru," he murmured, obviously amused. He heard the soft grumbling in reply as he slid his hand just a bit higher, brushing over his twin's rather obvious erection; his smirk was now a rather permanent feature on his lips, he was sure, as he slowly took advantage of the undeniable interest his little brother showed. "You want this." He dropped the pitch of his voice, sliding easily into the deep, rich tone that he would use while hosting, filled with dominance and seduction. "You belong with me - to me - don't you?" He knew now that Kaoru couldn't resist when he spoke like this; he'd seen his brother's reactions to it, discovered just how it affected him. It had confused him at first, but somehow, he'd begun to understand just what made his little brother tick. This is your fantasy, isn't it, Kaoru? To feel like I'm controlling you. His breath ghosted over the other teen's skin, causing him to shiver.
"Hikaru..." Golden eyes slid closed and Kaoru turned his head to the side again, chest heaving, arms reaching up to grab onto Hikaru's dark hair and hold him in place as his lips blindly sought his brother's out. They met, crashing together with insatiable passion; Kaoru felt as though he was filled with desperation, needing more of his twin - needing all of him - right then and there. He broke that first kiss too soon for his own liking, taking a quick breath before pulling Hikaru into another, tongue quickly forcing its way into the other's mouth in time with a low moan, and he couldn't for the life of him determine if it was his own or his brother's, although he found that he didn't much care either way. All he cared about was satisfying the extreme, intense hunger that he felt growing with every passing second, and he knew that the only thing that would satisfy that need was his brother: his skilled hands, his irresistible lips, his sinful tongue, his...
Kaoru's thoughts broke off there and he flushed again, fingers clenching momentarily in Hikaru's hair as he nipped desperately at the other's lower lip, tongue running over the area as soon as he removed his teeth. Each time they parted for air, he was panting harder and harder. "Don't stop..." he whispered breathlessly, barely audible over the falling water, tugging his brother's face back to his own so that their lips met again. The hand at his crotch grabbed him lightly, teasingly and he whimpered into Hikaru's mouth, hips shifting back against him so that he could revel in the feel of that hard length so torturously close to being inside of him. He wanted it. He'd wanted it so badly for a while now, and he was grasping desperately to his last shreds of control to prevent himself from demanding it, even if a part of him knew, knew beyond any shadow of a doubt, that his brother was counting on him losing it completely. He knew that Hikaru wanted him to beg to be taken, and he knew that he so desperately wanted to. Smug bastard.
Their kiss broke off again, and Hikaru managed to force his head down as Kaoru's hold slackened marginally, lips meeting the soft skin of his brother's shoulder. The faint sucking and delightful licking had the younger twin quaking in his arms and fingers finally unraveled from his head as arms slowly slid down for a loose, backwards hug around his neck. The words spilling from the redhead's mouth could barely be heard, couldn't even be properly understood, but they were heavenly to him nevertheless, a perfect encouragement to everything that he did. His fingers pinched again at the hardened, pink nub on his brother's chest, his other hand releasing the other teen's hard member and letting his fingers dance over it tantalizingly. He nearly laughed outright at the desperate groans and needy whimpers, just managing to bite back his amusement and continuing to shower his attention on the divine vision in his arms. Kaoru's control was snapping, his resolve ebbing away slowly but surely. He just needed to go a little longer, a little further, and he'd get exactly what he wanted.
Kaoru, meanwhile, tossed his head to the other side, gasping for air as his entire body felt like it was on fire. It was cruel, sweet torture, and he craved every light touch, each blissful moment of pressure, and every last teasing lick. He groaned again as fingertips brushed over his balls, mentally cursing and exalting his brother in the same instant as his head fell back onto the other's shoulder. "Damnit, Hikaru, just fuck me already."
The helpless, desperate demand was met by a deep chuckle. "And here I thought you'd never ask." His hands shifted, gliding along Kaoru's body only to come to a rest at his hips as his amber eyes surveyed the situation; suddenly, he realized that he hadn't quite planned out exactly how he would go about any of this beyond the very basic 'insert Tab A into Slot B,' and that, he knew, was a bit of a problem. After all, it wasn't like he wanted to hurt his twin or anything like that, and he knew they needed some way to actually support their weight. Frowning momentarily, he brushed his lips against Kaoru's ear again, voice no more than a heady whisper. "And just how would you like me to do it?" His words were accentuated by a slight rolling of his hips, Kaoru eliciting a careless gasp in response. A quick glance revealed the lovely blush dusting the other's cheeks as his eyes opened; it was so painfully obvious that shameless possibilities were running through his wicked head.
Kaoru's eyes lit up suddenly at one particular thought and he mumbled something incoherent, receiving a questioning hum in his ear that he knew was a request for repetition. His head declined by a couple of degrees and he mumbled again, blush deepening before he finally spoke clearly enough that the words would be distinguishable. "Against the wall..." The silence that followed his words wasn't very troubling to him; he knew immediately that Hikaru was presented with a mental image and was weighing the idea in his head.
He wasn't disappointed in the least when he felt that heated breath dancing over his ear again, forcing him to whimper with desire; it was such sweet torture to him now. "Almost like I'm forcing you?" Some might have found his mischievous tone to be almost malicious, but Kaoru knew that there was no such ill will in the words. He nodded slightly, feeling his face burn even hotter, and he knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that Hikaru had raised his right eyebrow before leering at him. "Keeping you pinned to it?" Another impassioned gasp was the only response that the elder twin truly required, but the younger still nodded quickly, squirming desperately in his grasp. Hikaru angled his head down, sucking on the juncture of his brother's neck and shoulder momentarily before murmuring into his skin, "I can do that."
Hands still on Kaoru's hips, he turned them just enough that his brother was facing one of the marble walls of their shower, feeling thin arms move from his shoulders and then watching as they came forward so that palms rested against the smooth, cream stone inlaid with gold. They took shaky breaths in unison as he massaged his twin's skin lightly before slowly, carefully retracting his hands, pulling back just enough to watch him as he stood there, leaning against the wall to support himself, shoulders rising and falling with each breath as he gradually turned his head to look over his shoulder, drawing his lower lip between his teeth and watching him expectantly. "Hika-"
"Shh..." He leaned in to kiss Kaoru's shoulder, right hand resting on the small of his back before lazily moving down his back to come to a halt on the curve of his ass; Kaoru's eyes clenched shut and he turned his face away as his teeth bit into his lip just a bit more as Hikaru slid one finger between the cheeks, his left hand coming up to rest on Kaoru's, gripping tightly for a moment before pressing it to the wall. A shivery gasp escaped the younger twin as the fingertip pressed lightly against his entrance. "Relax," he murmured smoothly, pressing in carefully. "Just relax." He watched as his brother nodded his head slowly, a faint whimper urging him on; he slid his finger farther in, frowning as Kaoru's whole body seemed to tense as each minor knuckle passed into him, and he would pause to allow his twin to calm down. Slowly, he drew his finger back out almost entirely before sliding it back in, a little faster this time; the redhead's shoulders sagged and he rested his forehead against the wall, legs shifting apart, encouraging the elder twin to repeat the action. This time, it was met with a soft moan, and he kissed his shoulder again, removing his finger entirely in spite of the disappointed whimper, only to replace it with two. A sharp gasp met his ears and he paused, concerned. "Am I hurting you?" Immediately, Kaoru shook his head.
"Keep going... please, Hikaru..." The words were anxious and eager, pleadingly urging him onward, and he had no desire to disappoint him. Still, he was cautious, stretching his twin carefully to avoid causing him too much pain or discomfort. He continued to slide his fingers into and out of him, hand twisting somewhat and tearing more moans from Kaoru's throat; he loved that sound. Fingers pressing back in, he curled them at their joints very slightly, the tip of a third rubbing lightly at the other's entrance and causing Kaoru to let his head fall back, eyes snapping open to glower at him. "Stop being such a fucking tease."
"I'm just trying to make sure I don't hurt you," he retorted with a throaty chuckle, withdrawing his fingers and watching with amusement as Kaoru instinctively moved back along with them; he brought one knee forward to press into the back of the other's leg, forcing him forward again. "After all, you're such a fragile girl." He immediately felt the tension in Kaoru's body as he attempted to close his left hand into a fist, knowing that there would be a retort if he waited to long. Of course, Hikaru had no intention of allowing his twin to reply this time, pressing up against his back and taking hold of his own erection in his right hand, guiding himself between the cheeks of his brother's ass and pressing the tip to his entrance, pushing just his head into him without any hesitation. Instantly, Kaoru's spine went stiff and his mouth fell open in a silent cry, Hikaru's hands taking hold of his wrists in a tight grip even as he whispered soothingly into his ear. "It's alright, just try to relax, Kaoru. I don't want to hurt you." Yet, even as the younger twin nodded in response, he still couldn't manage to relax himself at all, his fingers curling against the wall and his whole body shaking. The darker-haired teen couldn't help but frown at this, kissing his neck reassuringly. "Do you want to stop?" But he shook his head quickly, without even needing a moment to think on the matter, and Hikaru nodded against him, trying his hardest not to move forward just yet.
"Hika-" He cut off before he could finish saying his brother's name, hissing in a breath and clenching his eyes shut; Hikaru's hands released his wrists, coming to rest on his hips again and rubbing gently, causing him to shiver pleasurably. "Hikaru..." He felt his twin nod against his neck again before placing another kiss there, which brought a small, fond smile to his lips, but it faded as he pressed his lips together determinedly and adjusted his palms against the wall, trying to push back slightly. He stopped almost immediately as a strangled, pained yelp escaped his throat, and he hung his head. Hikaru's hands on his hips continued to rub his skin consolingly.
"Give yourself a chance to get used to it, idiot." The words were muttered into his ear, a mix of admonishment and concern as the older twin watched him breathing hard, chest heaving. One hand reached up to brush through copper hair placatingly. "Relax, we've got all the time in the world here. We don't have to move until you're ready." Kaoru nodded slightly, eyes still shut tight as he tried to force himself to calm down.
What the hell is wrong with me? It's Hikaru... it's just Hikaru. He won't hurt me. I wanted this. I want this. He nodded again, managing to take a deep, calming breath, muscles loosening; Hikaru smiled against his neck, kissing his skin again, and that gave him an idea. "Hikaru, kiss me." He turned his head to the side, a small amount of fear written clearly in his eyes as he gave a shaky smile. His brother watched him worriedly for a moment before nodding, tilting his head to press their lips together, tongue slowly, cautiously sliding into Kaoru's mouth. The younger twin sucked in a little, concentrating solely on that kiss, and Hikaru seemed to understand, his hand moving away from Kaoru's head to brace himself on the wall, pushing himself farther into his brother's body while he was distracted. The action caused the redhead's attention to split again and he whined painfully into Hikaru's mouth, tensing momentarily before the dark-haired teen stroked his tongue with his own, drawing his attention back to the slow, deliberate kiss that they were sharing, calming him back down for long enough that Hikaru was able to fully sheathe himself inside of Kaoru's ass. Their kiss lingered for a moment longer before breaking. "Hi...karu..."
He shushed him kindly again, rubbing their cheeks together and slowly removing his hand from Kaoru's hip so that he could cover both of Kaoru's hands with his own, not moving after that save for the panting breaths causing his chest to rise and fall deeply. "It's alright now; we'll stay like this as long as you need." He smiled gently as Kaoru nodded and pressed back against him; physical contact with one another had always had a calming effect on them, and he knew that his twin was relying on that to do the trick for him now, too. His thumbs stroked along the sides of the younger twin's hands. "Take your time, I'm not going anywhere." He pressed a quick kiss to the tip of Kaoru's nose before placing a gentle one on his lips, whispering against them after, "I love you." He kept his golden eyes open as he spoke, watching his brother's reaction closely; it made him smile to see Kaoru's blush deepen, and he pushed forward so that his brother could rest against the wall comfortably without losing any of their contact from each other.
"Love you, too." The words were almost sighed out, a faint hint of elation to them as Kaoru's head lolled back to rest on his older twin's shoulder. He worried at his lower lip for a moment, amber eyes searching their mirror image. "And... I trust you. Please..." There was a brief pause again before Hikaru nodded, pulling out very slightly before pressing back in; Kaoru whimpered at the minimal retreat, only to gasp as Hikaru was fully inside of him again. It was uncomfortable and even a little painful, but he couldn't deny that it was extremely pleasurable at the same time. Certainly something that he could get used to, if nothing else. The motions were repeated, settling them into a slow, gentle, extremely careful pace for the time being while Kaoru adjusted to the sensation of his brother's cock stroking inside of him. Each time that Hikaru moved pulled another moan, whimper, gasp, or whine from Kaoru's lips as his muscles loosened further. "Ah... my god, Hikaru..."
"Glad you think so highly of me," came the grunted response, and the younger twin probably would have hit his counterpart right then if his hands weren't held to the wall as they were.
"Just shut up and go faster."
An amused laugh. "So impatient. But sure, I can do that for you, my delicate little Kaoru." He knew that he'd be in for it later with the jibes he was making at his brother's expense, but for now, he really couldn't care less; the sex was more than worth it. Hikaru's hands slid from Kaoru's, down to his wrists to hold him firmly again, suddenly pulling out almost all the way before thrusting back in quickly. Kaoru cried out at this, and he almost stopped moving before hearing him whimper for him to do it again; Hikaru obliged, his thrusts growing faster and harder each time that he pulled out, and Kaoru nearly screamed before settling on breathlessly repeating his name and begging for more.
Each piercing plunge of his engorged member into the tight heat of his twin's ass tore another gasping, eager word from Kaoru's throat, urging him further onward. The words were repetitious, bordering on the verge of imploring whimpers until, suddenly, as Hikaru thrust into him again, Kaoru shouted and threw his head back almost violently, spine rigid for a moment before relaxing back with a sort of purr. "Hika...ru... g-god... nn... oh god, Hikaru... don't stop... do it again..."
But he had stopped as soon as he was fully enveloped by Kaoru again, watching worriedly once his twin had tensed up until the words encouraged him again. Licking at Kaoru's neck once, he grinned, almost as though he were a cat and Kaoru were the poor canary that he had caught within his grasp, slowly drawing his right arm downward and thus forcing Kaoru's to come along with it. "Really, I'm glad you've finally seen the merit in worshiping me." Still, he pulled their right arms downward, loosening his grip on his younger brother's wrist slightly as he brought Kaoru's hand close enough that his fingertips were brushing his own erection. His smirk remained firmly on his lips as Kaoru gasped at the sensation. "Your god commands you to touch yourself, Kaoru." There was a momentary sound of confusion before a nod of understanding that preceded Kaoru's long, slim, elegant fingers wrapping around his own cock; Hikaru's gaze traveled down to watch before he kissed the juncture of his brother's neck and shoulder again, left hand slowly forcing Kaoru's hand up above his head as he released his right wrist, fingers trailing over the other boy's chest en route to his lips. There was no hesitation as those sinfully rosy lips parted to suck two of his fingers into his mouth, and both brothers groaned as one.
Finally, Hikaru began to move again, inclining his head a small degree so that his mouth rested against Kaoru's right ear. "So good, Kaoru..." he breathed, thrusting quickly and forcefully into his brother's waiting body; he was rewarded with a long, low sound that was a cross between a whimper and moan, and his gaze traveled down again, watching the spot where Kaoru held himself, stroking in perfect time to each aggressive thrust. Once, twice, three times, then a fourth, and suddenly the copper-haired twin's eyes went wide as he came, his mouth opening in what started as a keening wail but quickly became a cry of his older brother's name as Hikaru's fingers slipped from his mouth. His muscles tensed, the ones in his ass clamping tightly around Hikaru's cock, and the older twin grunted momentarily, right arm wrapping around his brother's shoulders to pull him tightly to himself. He completed one final thrust forward before reaching his own climax, releasing into Kaoru's body with a similar shout.
They remained like that, Kaoru's forehead pressed to the wall with Hikaru still inside of him, both panting and gasping to regain their breath. Kaoru's left hand was still being held to the wall and his right remained at his crotch for a minute before he trusted himself enough to move. Slowly, he raised it into his own view and knew that Hikaru was watching with an expression of bored disinterest, although what he was feeling was anything but. He regarded it with a sense of detachment, gaze fixed on the milky white fluid on his fingers. His awareness was invaded by a voice whispering into his ear, "Taste it." The younger twin blanched, turning his head just enough to look at Hikaru with questioning amber eyes. "Taste it," he repeated.
Frowning again, in consternation this time, he turned his gaze back to his hand before raising it to his lips, a small dash of pink visible through his lips as the tip of his tongue peeked out to sample his own semen. He scrunched his nose slightly at the salty taste before raising his hand over his shoulder in offering to Hikaru, who also licked at one of his fingers; the sweep of his tongue over the digit was far less reserved, and he hummed thoughtfully. "Nothing too amazing," Kaoru commented dispassionately.
"Not bad, though," Hikaru replied, also indifferent before he reached his own right hand up, taking hold of Kaoru's chin and turning his face to look at him; a smirk lit his features again. "But you'd probably like mine better." The comment earned him a light, affectionate whack on the nose.
"Idiot." Kaoru followed the word up by giving Hikaru a one-armed, backwards hug, leaning his head back and closing his eyes with a smile before murmuring, "I like everything about you better." They remained that way for a few moments before Hikaru finally released his younger twin's wrist, bringing his own arm around the other's waist and kissing him lightly while Kaoru let his left arm fall to join his right around his brother's shoulders. They both hummed faintly, basking in each other's embrace and sharing another gentle kiss before Kaoru frowned against his brother's lips. "Plan on getting out of me anytime soon?"
"Well, I wasn't planning on it, but if you really insist..." This earned him another light smack, to the back of his head this time, and he chuckled, slowly running both hands down to Kaoru's hips, holding him in place and carefully pulling back and out of him, arms immediately wrapping around his brother's waist once more. They were silent as they rested against each other, Hikaru turning them around so that he was leaning back against the wall and Kaoru back against him, mirroring each other's soft smiles. "I could get used to this." His twin nodded, humming in contented agreement. Neither bothered to mention the obvious, that there was no going back after this; in both of their minds, they understood that they'd passed that point weeks earlier.
Grudgingly, Kaoru peeled himself out of his brother's arms, drawing a groan of disappointment from the dark-haired teen before he turned himself around and settled back down, face resting on Hikaru's shoulder as he found himself enveloped in a warm embrace once more, his own arms trapped against his twin's chest. Their breathing was evening out now as water splashed them just barely, as it had been doing all along in spite of neither twin noticing it while they had been all over each other. One pair of amber eyes drifted closed as the other turned up to look at the ceiling; Hikaru's right hand trailed up Kaoru's back so that his fingers could play with his brother's hair idly. "You're amazing, you know," he murmured, and Kaoru smiled against his skin.
"I know." Hikaru laughed at that, the same rich, lively laugh that Kaoru had always adored and cherished, selfishly guarding as his own special treasure, and he couldn't help but join in, leaning in and rubbing his nose against his brother's chest. But they settled down quickly, simply relaxing again before Kaoru turned his head to watch the water pouring from the showerhead with indifference. "We should probably get cleaned up," he said thoughtfully.
"What if I wanted to keep you dirty?" A light smack was heard as Kaoru raised one hand from Hikaru's chest only to hit him with it a moment later; it wasn't a forceful smack, and it was clear that he was amused by the comment. Sighing dramatically, Hikaru nodded, pushing off the wall and releasing Kaoru, bringing their hands together and taking hold of his twin's gently as he stepped backwards carefully. "Well, join me, then," he said, smiling as the redhead nodded, embracing him under the falling water. They stayed there, silent once more and simply holding each other. Slowly, their heads tilted to each other, lips meeting in a slow kiss, not lit by the desperate fervor that they were used to but by a soft, gentle love that was no less passionate. Their tongues passed into each other's mouths, neither exploring before they pulled apart lazily, lingering for a few moments before smiling as one once again. No words were needed then as Hikaru reached for their shampoo, opening the bottle and pouring some onto his opposing hand before handing it off to Kaoru, who did the same before replacing the bottle onto its shelf. Hands lifted up, each to the opposite twin's head, and fingers lost themselves in hair, gently caressing and massaging at scalps.
This continued, with each washing the other, until both were cleaned off and the last of the suds were washed from their hair and bodies. Hikaru turned away from Kaoru to close off the water, missing the glint in the other's eyes that disappeared as he turned back to him. He extended a hand to his younger twin, who accepted it without hesitation, and the two stepped out from their shower, each reaching for a towel to dry off with. Kaoru dropped his into the hamper when he was finished, grabbing his robe from behind the door and sliding it on, tying it loosely; Hikaru simply wrapped his towel around his waist. The younger twin had always rolled his eyes at this, but he knew that his brother had always been just that small bit more shameless than him. It was one of those quirks about them, a small point of difference that no one else could possibly know. That was something that, when he thought about it right then, excited and comforted him. A small reminder that no one knew Hikaru as well as he did, and the same in reverse.
Hikaru raised one dark eyebrow at him, questioning the introspective look in his eyes, but Kaoru simply shook his head, walking out of the bathroom with his twin following just behind him. Once he was in the middle of the room, he paused.
"By the way, Hikaru?"
"Hm?" Without any further warning, Hikaru felt a fist slam into his chest and all of the air he'd managed to get into his lungs rushed out immediately. He raised one hand to the abused area, rubbing lightly and frowning.
"I'm not a girl, you jerk." It took half a minute for the words to process before the darker-haired twin suddenly began to laugh happily as he recalled the jibe he'd made in the shower, and Kaoru glowered at him, smacking his arm this time, now that he could. "I'll get you back for that."
Suddenly, Hikaru's arms were around his waist and the twins were flush against each other's bodies. "Hm..." Hikaru leaned in, lips brushing over his brother's in a manner that had become so familiar to the two of them over the previous few weeks. "I'm looking forward to it. Feel like starting now?" This time, it was Kaoru's turn to take a few moments to process what had been said, a slow grin forming on his lips before he nodded, bringing one hand behind his twin's neck and pulling him nearer to close the infinitesimal gap between them.
It was going to be a long, long Sunday.