A/N: This is a short little one shot that I just had sudden inspiration for. I was testing out my HTML skills in Notepad, wondering what to format. I decided to write a little Tiva one shot. I have never written a one shot before, so, here goes…

I don't know how to say this... I don't even know if I can...

Well, I will try.

We have known each other for a long time. We have worked together, partners. I guess that doing that does create some sort of bond...

We have been on many missions together, including one very 'memorable' one where we posed as Jean Paul and Sophie Ranier.

It is when you have to work that... close... with someone that you realize some things.

I remember when, three months ago, my apartment was flooded. I had nowhere to live for a while, and so I stayed at work. You came back in to collect something, and found me asleep at my desk. The "Israeli Ninja Chick," sleeping at work.

You asked me why, and I made up an excuse that I had just fallen asleep, but you didn't fall for it. Ziva David? Falling asleep at work? Yes, right. That happens a lot.

You eventually coaxed the truth out of me, and offered for me to stay with you. I agreed, trying to be reluctant, when really, I had been waiting for you to ask.

It was only when we got to your apartment that we both realized something. I had no clothes, as we hadn't stopped at my apartment. And your apartment only had one bedroom.

You had no issues with sleeping with me, but I said that I didn't want to. In reality, I wished that the night could be like a real experience of our undercover mission.

You offered to sleep on the couch, which surprised me. I told you that I would sleep there, that it was your house, but you wouldn't take no for an answer.

You offered me some clothes to borrow for the night, as well. I was surprised at just how neat your bedroom was, also.

I was almost asleep when I heard you enter the room. I pretended to be sleeping, and you approached the bed. I wasn't sure what you were going to do, but what you did do surprised me the most.

You leaned over me, and kissed my forehead. You said, "I love you, Ziva. Even though you will never realize how much, I do." You turned to walk away, but I grabbed your wrist and pulled you back. I remember your reaction...

"Shit, you heard that?" I remember laughing at that, and telling you that I certainly did. I pulled you down next to me, and that night, we slept together.

The next day we went to work as usual, pretending that nothing had happened.

I stayed at your apartment for two months, until they had cleared up the mess made of my apartment block. I was sad to leave, and I guess you were too.

And now, one month later, you are gone.

Gone.

The man who did this to you, I knew him. I knew him from school, although only Gibbs knows this. I do not want Abby and McGee knowing that I, inadvertently or not, caused your death.

I killed his brother two years ago, in a shoot out that killed one of my other partners. And now you are gone too.

I only found out yesterday, that you aren't gone completely.

A piece of you will stay with me.

Six months to go.

I wish you could be here to see your baby... If it is a boy, it shall be called "Anthony" after his father, who served his country, and died for the woman he loved. If a girl, "Antonia Talia" after the two people who have ever mattered most to me.

And now, both of you are gone.

I miss you...

Why did you have to leave me?

Ziva.

Please review, and say what you think.

And, please, no bashing because I killed Tony!