Done for the SSBB Kink meme! Prompt was as follows:

"General: IkeMarth. Marth inexplicably turns into a kitten! What does his gentle dope of a lover have to say about it? Have some fun with this one, Anon. :)"

Ike was sitting on his bed reading a magazine and mumbling quietly to himself, just like he had been for the past two hours. He sighed and leaned up into a sitting position, deciding to take the bull by the horns and confront it. He sauntered up to the en suite bathroom door tiredly, and knocked on it a few times.

"Marth, you've been in the shower for two hours! Shake a leg, princess, before you use up all the hot water again!"

He waited.

The only response was a sound like 'Eep!' and a crash. The mercenary tensed, it sounded like something fell. He tried knocking again.

"Marth, are you okay in there?"

Silence.

"Marth, I'm coming in, okay?"

More silence. He figured he had given the prince enough of a warning and he quietly turned the knob and pushed open the door. His lover was nowhere to be seen in the small bathroom, but there was evidence of a slip, as one of his fluffy bath towels was in a heap on the tiled floor. Ike continued prowling around, looking for any sign of him. There were no windows, and Ike had definitely heard him in the bathroom.

"…Marth?" he called quietly, pacing around. He even opened the pair of cabinet doors under the sink, but there was nothing there. As he stood up again to collect his thoughts, there was a short, high-pitched groan coming from the tub. Almost reflexively, the mercenary rushed over to the bathtub and pulled back the shower curtain, only to find, not his friend, but a tiny white kitten instead.

Ike stared at it blankly. The kitten mewed tiredly and paced around the floor of the tub, eventually deciding to plop down for a nap in the middle of the floor. Ike swooped down and picked it up by the nape of its neck, and the little kitten stared at him, somehow managing to look irate.

"Oh no you don't. I don't know how you got in here, but if you think I'm going to let you go to sleep until I find out, you're sadly mistaken." With that, he brought the kitten out to the main room of his shared dorm room, sitting it on the carpeted floor—soon after following suit and sitting cross legged in front of it.

"Okay, you. Now, I'm assuming Marth brought you in here, even though he knows he isn't supposed to bring home strays…" The kitten seemed to react to that name, and it bolted upright to stare at Ike's face as he thought. Looking enlightened, he padded closer to the sitting mercenary, opting to hop into his lap. The little cat meowed excitedly, pawing at Ike's thigh. The traveler watched it with mild curiosity, wondering why it responded so forcefully to Marth's name. "Um. Well, in any case, I guess the first thing I have to do is find Marth so he can explain things to me, then we've got to find a home for you." The kitten turned around slowly to stare at the mercenary's face again, and Ike quirked an eyebrow at it. Suddenly it started mewing sadly, pawing uselessly at Ike's chest. Ike picked it up by the neck and held it close to his face, only to be batted at with a soft paw. He sighed and held the cat in both of his hands—it really did seem small, even for a kitten. In response, it melted into his palms, purring and gently rubbing its head against his fingers.

"What's wrong, kitty?" he cooed quietly. In his mind, he made fun of himself—as if this cat could understand human speech. The kitten jumped out of his palms and sat in his lap again, meowing indecipherably. It shoved its head into his leg and purred at him. Ike sighed. "This is getting me nowhere…" he murmured, changing positions so he was laying chest-up on the carpet. The kitten padded around on the floor until it reached his face, and pawed at his cheek softly, trying to get his attention. It failed, however, as Ike began to slowly close his eyes. The cat made a face that could only be accurately be described as a pout if it were human, and bounded onto Ike's chest, patting his ribs in another attempt to wake him. That really didn't catch his attention either, but he stared tiredly at the cat as it comically was moved up and down by his steady breathing.

At last the tiny white cat had enough of the mercenary's disrespect, and it quickly walked around on his body until it reached his thigh again, laying down to take a nap right on his pelvis. Ike snorted.

"You're a little pervert, aren't you?" he muttered, reaching down to stroke the kitten's head. However, it wasn't until the little cat showed all his pointy little teeth and hooked one of them into the zipper on the mercenary's jeans that it hit him. He sat up too fast, the cat falling off his leg and meowing in discomfort. He picked it up and stared at it as the cat stared back at him with round eyes.

"…Marth?" he asked tentatively, bouncing the kitten in his palms. It sounded ridiculous, but what other explanation could there be for a tiny kitten in his bathroom that responded very well to his touch, the prince nowhere to be found, and no other leads?

The cat mewed happily, turning around in his hands until it made a complete circle and staring at the mercenary's face intently when it was finished. Ike started laughing, the small vibrations in his body causing the kitten to stir and nearly fall over.

"I don't believe this…" he said to himself, holding the kitten—sorry, Marth—in one hand and using the other to stroke his tiny face. "Marth, did you seriously turn into a cat? How did that happen?" he asked between chuckles, as if expecting a tangible answer. Marth only made a sound that could pass for a scoff and licked Ike's palm. The mercenary lifted up his little furry prince and sat him on his head, the kitten immediately making a makeshift nest in his hair.

"Come on, you. I have to go find out what the hell happened to you." He laughed a bit more before standing up and exiting his room to go ask around. He doubted anyone would believe his story, but if they didn't, the little white kitten on his head could complain at them until they did.

I REGRET NOTHING.