Miko: So my idea is for this to be a 3-shot (1st Matt, 2nd Mello, 3rd Reunion). I may add a 4th to take place right before they die. Let me know if you think I should. (:

This story was inspired by 'The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot' by Brand New. You should listen to that song. Its so MattxMello

Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Death Note or Brand New.

Flashes of You

"I'll always love you, Mel." The red-haired teen whispered to the picture in his hand. He could almost see the blonde's mouth twitch into a smirk, though the annoyed glare was permanent on the blonde's face. "No matter what you say to me."

The red-head tucked the picture into his pocket carefully, making sure not to bend the corners. He knew what Mello would say if he could see Matt now. For a moment, he could almost see Mello sitting on the twin bed across from him. The blond would roll his eyes and push a lock of gold hair from his perfect face. A lazy smirk would then dominate his features a moment before he spoke in a lazy drawl.

"Don't be ridiculous Matt." Then he would snap a bite of chocolate with his teeth and flip onto his back to stare at the ceiling. His hands would drift behind his head and his legs would bend at the knees. Matt would just watch him until the blonde grew bored of his audience.

"Get out of here, Matt." He would say, tilting his head to see the red-head from the corner of his eye. "You're such a fucking retard." And Matt would smile and leave because he knew what Mello was really saying behind the hostility.

But then Mello had left, and not even Matt knew where he had gone to. From the pocket he had just discarded the picture into; he pulled out a torn piece of paper. The words were scrawled hastily, and were almost intelligible.

Matt,

Don't try to find me. I don't want to see you again. Enclosed is enough money to start your programming business.

Goodbye,

Mello

P.S. Don't waste it on cigs.

Matt would not have followed Mello anyway, no matter how his heart shattered in his chest. He knew that one day Mello would come back for him, even if only to tell him how useless he was. However, part of him wanted to retreat into a ball and cry on the floor. What if the words were true? What if Mello really didn't want to see him again? But no. Mello must care about him if he left him the money, almost $15,000 American dollars. But Matt refused to use the money, because it was one of the only things he had left from Mello.

Despite everything his heart told him, life continued without Mello. If the daze the red-head walked around in could be counted as a life. If Matt was indifferent to the world while Mello was around, he had now withdrawn totally into himself. With Mello and Near gone – the albino had left days after Mello – Matt was consistently the top of the class. But he didn't care about that. Every day he would walk back to his room hoping he would see the blond waiting just inside the door, leaning against the wall. He would be holding a bar of chocolate, which he would take a bite of just as Matt walked in the room.

"I knew you would come back." Matt would say. He would be stopped in the doorway, not daring to move in case he broke the illusion and the blond angel ran away again.

"Of course." Mello would say, shrugging, just a rise of his shoulder so slight no one but Matt would even know what he meant by it. But Matt would know, and he would let a smile drift over his lips for the first time. "Ready to blow this crap hole?" And Matt would grab his jacket, goggles, and game boy and they would leave together, the envy of every orphan in the house.

But Mello never came, and the years passed. The burning fire in Matt's chest turned to a dull ache that kept him lying awake at night, unable to cry, but still unable to sleep. On those nights, he would pretend he could hear Mello's steady breath in the bed beside his. At first, the high pitched snore had kept Matt awake and grinding his teeth. But all too easily it had become a soothing lullaby, without which he couldn't sleep. Somehow, Matt made it three years without Mello.

It was only the hope of turning the corner and running into the blond that kept Matt moving. The suspense – tension - building as he neared a room. The door would open and his eyes would light in hope, only to fade as he realized there was no one waiting for him, smirking and annoyed. The paper containing Mello's last goodbye was so worn from being read that it was almost white. That was when Matt decided something had happened to Mello. But the picture of Mello, lying hurt and broken on the ground, did not match with any of Matt's memories, so he rejected it. But still…

When he walked towards the gates of Wammy's with a backpack slung across his shoulder, he almost thought he saw Mello leaning against the gate, smirking sideways at Matt as he approached. But the only person standing at the gate was Rodger, who didn't say anything as Matt left Whammy's House for the last time. In fact, Matt thought he almost saw approval flash across Rodger's face, but soon the old man was pushed to the back of his mind. Already, Matt could picture his reunion with Mello.

The background was nondescript, but Mello would be busy – sometimes eating a bar of chocolate, sometimes arguing with Near – and he wouldn't see Matt's approach. Matt would have a minute to just look at the figure of his best friend in silence, as he never could do when Mello was staring back at him. Then some sound – the scuff of a boot, the beep of some electronic device – would alert Mello to the second person in the room. The blond would turn quickly, rising into a defensive stance, to face Matt. His face would go slack and then spread into one of those rare smiles Mello saved only for Matt.

"What the fuck took you so long, Matt?" He would ask, quickly hiding the joy behind the hostility again. Matt would smile and walked up to Mello so they were standing face to face.

"I was waiting for you." Matt would say, and Mello's face would contort into another rare emotion – shame and pity. Then the older boy would wrap his arms around Matt and pull him close.

"I didn't want to leave you." Mello would whisper into the red hair. "I thought you would find me sooner. I was so certain you would use the money to find me." And Matt would pull back to look at the older boy.

"I found you now." He would say. "And now you never need to run away again." And he would press his lips to Mello's as he had only dreamed of doing before. Then he would pull away and burry his head in Mello's chest. "Now we can be together forever."

"Forever." Mello would agree.

Matt didn't know where to start looking for his happy ending, but he knew that nothing would stop him. The thought of possibly seeing Mello again soon was enough to keep Matt searching forever. And he knew just where to look if Mello ever intended them to meet again. Once safely out of Whammy's, Matt pulled out his unused laptop and powered it up. Searching through the memory, he found what he was looking for.

Miko: So this is my first attempt at Matt/Mello. Let me know if you could follow it, because I tried something weird with the time(sort of - the flashes forward don't actually happen, Matt just imagines them). After I hear back about that, I'll write the next chapter, this one in Mello's POV.

UPDATE: Fixed a few spelling/grammer mistakes. If you see any more, PM me please. (: I wrote this at like 11 at night when I should have been studying for a history test, so I'm sure I'm missing some mistakes. xx;