A/N: Okay, so yesterday when I was watching Twilight with my sister, I thought: Do Light and L like Twilight? I myself am a Twilight fan (though not so much the movie) but I just recently discovered that not everyone is, and it just sort of evolved into this weird…story? I believe it would be better defined as a crackfic.
Maybe slightly AUish, since Twilight does not exist in their timeline. OOCness for both L and Light as the story progresses. I didn't really go back and edit it since it was getting early, so feel free to tell me if something sounds strange.
I do not own DeathNote. Otherwise, L would still be alive, and those handcuffs would have never come off.
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"Twilight? You seriously rented that movie?" Light asked incredulously.
"No. Watari rented it for me."
"You like Twilight?!"
"Of course," L replied matter-of-factly. As he continued spooning sugar into his coffee, L turned to face one of the several surveillance cameras in the kitchen. "Watari, I would like you to ask the taskforce to take the day off. Spend it with their families… or whatever."
There was a crash as Light dropped his coffee cup. "Be careful not to cut yourself when you clean that up," said L. When Light did not respond, he waved a hand at the closet. "There is a broom in there, probably."
"You gave the taskforce the day off so you can watch Twilight? You're going to watch that movie rather than work on the Kira case?!"
"No." L looked over at Light, who was still standing next to the coffeepot. "We are taking the day off to give you time to read the novel that this movie was based on."
"What?! Why –"
"Well," continued L, ignoring Light's protests, "it is obvious by your disdain of the series that you have never read it. I do not want to be interrupted by your questions during the movie." He took a sip of his 'coffee', grimaced, and began adding more sugar to it.
Light slowly walked over to the table and sat down next to L. He rested his head in the cradle of his arms. It was silent except for the sound of L stirring more sugar into his coffee. "L," Light ventured after a moment, "what, exactly, makes you think that I am going to watch Twilight with you?"
"First of all, we are handcuffed together." L shook the chain lightly for emphasis. "Therefore, you will be in the same room with me. I believe it would be considered rather rude for you to work on the Kira case while I am trying to watch a movie. Just as it would be rude for you to leave that mess for Watari to clean up."
"Grumbling, Light retrieved the broom from the closet and began sweeping up the remains of his coffee cup. "Why didn't you just go see it in the theater with the rest of the fangirls?" he asked.
L either didn't notice or chose to ignore the sarcasm in Light's question. "I did want to go on opening night, but Watari forbid it. Apparently it was too dangerous even as Ryuusaki…" He sighed regretfully, and then looked over at Light. "Now then, when you finish that, I would like you to begin reading. Otherwise we might not start the movie until midnight."
"Fine," Light said as he grabbed the book and stalked from the room, dragging L behind him.
9:38 am:
'I don't understand why L even likes this story! It's so candy-coated –' He looked over at L, who was admiring a chocolate-covered strawberry, 'actually, that's probably why…'
"Light, have you finished yet?"
Light sighed. "L, if you simply looked over here, you would see that I am not even halfway through the book yet."
10:02 am:
"Light, are you –"
"No!" Light nearly yelled out of exasperation. "If you would stop asking me whether I have finished every five minutes, I might be able to finish!"
"Actually, it's been 24 minutes since I last asked."
Light's head jerked up at that. 'It's been that long?' he thought. Glancing down at his watch, he saw that over 2 hours had passed since he had begun reading. "Whatever," he mumbled. Then he got off the couch, moved as far away from L as the chain would allow, and sat down – on the floor. "Just stop asking me whether I'm done yet, okay?"
12:30 pm:
"Light? Light-kun? … Kira?"
"…not Kira…"
"Watari brought lunch. Would you care to eat?"
"…"
1:49 pm:
"Light, would you like to eat your lunch? Watari is taking it away now."
Once again, there was no response to L's queries, as had been the case for several hours. L grabbed a bag of chips and waved it in front of Light. "I believe these are your favorite. Wasabi-flavored. Would you like one?"
"Stop…trying to read." Light's reply was just barely coherent.
2:15 pm:
"Light?"
"…"
"Light?"
"…shut up."
L was silent for a moment, then, "Do you like Twilight?"
"Yes…" Light replied, rather reluctantly.
"Good."
2:20 pm:
"Light! You are over three-fourths done!" L exclaimed.
This comment was lost to Light as he continued to read, oblivious to L's joyous proclamations and the rattling of the chain as L began setting up a "theater", or rather, directing Watari as to how the theater was to be set up.
3:10
After Light had finished, he continued to sit on the floor, almost in a daze at the fact that he was finished. He might have stayed like that for a while had L's face not appeared in front of him, jolting him from his reverie.
"Ah. I see you have finished; the movie is ready over there." L pointed to a corner of the room where a TV and couch were set up, no doubt by Watari.
As Light moved to stand, his legs cramped up, and he fell back to the floor. Startled, he checked his watch and was shocked to see that he had been sitting like that for over five hours. 'No wonder I can't stand,' he thought as he tried to rub some life back into his legs. After a bit, he was able to move enough to stumble over to the couch and collapse next to L.
"Hey, L…"
"What is it?" After nearly eight hours of waiting, L was itching to finally start Twilight.
"What was the second reason?"
"What?"
Light guessed he might have been grasping at straws thinking that L would remember, but he really wanted to know. "In the kitchen this morning, when I asked you why I would be watching Twilight with you. Your answer indicated that there were multiple reasons why, but you only mentioned one."
"Ah, yes. I do recall that conversation."
They sat there for a few minutes, and then Light asked, "Was there a second reason?"
"Well, isn't it nicer to watch a movie with someone else?"
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A/N2: Yes, I did in fact calculate approx. how much time Light took to read Twilight. If eight hours seems a little short, then you have probably not read Twilight. Personally, I think it is a bit long for Light, but keep in mind that he didn't really want to read it (at first).
Reviews are love!